Randoms - Week of 11/13

kaylawing

@MJDsquared I also agree you should give beets another chance when they are roasted. So tasty. 

mdcd44127

@rebeckyjoy Awww, I want to reach through the screen and give your pup some pets. So sweet!

@failuretofly I just said to DH last night that I feel like a switch was flipped at work and all the comments have gone from "you have so much time left!" to "oh wow, any minute now!" Um.... well, no, I do have over 2 weeks left before my due date, but thank you for your concern. I keep making the standard "just hoping to make it through Thanksgiving dinner!" joke.

 Tomorrow is my last day of work, woohoo!! I'm practically falling asleep every time I blink and my house is a complete disaster, so the time off will be much needed/appreciated.

balletnerd

@failuretofly I don't know why some people see pregnancy as a "condition" you can't work through... I'm surprised I haven't gotten more comments from parents about me still teaching dance and demonstrating etc. But I'm glad I haven't! How Annoying!

failuretofly

@djd0404 same here! Also, that bob's burgers gif is amazing! I love Linda haha

@balletnerd right? I had someone give me shit for pushing an empty wheelchair... like wtf? I'm not inept!

MJDsquared

@failuretofly I was wheeling an empty office chair into my supervisor's office for a meeting and my coworker was like, "Let me do it so [the controller, our boss's boss] doesn't give me crap for letting a pregnant woman do it."

Seriously? It's like 2 pounds...and I'm not even carrying it, just pushing it.

Also, my mind is blown about roasted beets. Last night DH was like, "What do people do with beets?" and I was like, "Idk, I've only seen them eaten on salads." I had no idea there were other things to do with them. Hahaha.

flowerpower5838

So fun story about beets. I was cutting up a beet to use in the juicer and it looked like I had blood all over my hand and I SCREAMED at Dh that I just cut my finger off and we needed to go to the ER. For some reason he didn't find me yelling "gotcha" funny after he freaked out, jumped up and ran upstairs. 

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

 

weaver15

Talking about beets reminds me of Doug Funny 

MJDsquared

Talking about beets reminds me of Dwight Schrute.

flowerpower5838

Marley629

I don't think I've ever had a beet. 

whiska

For people taking some time off work before your edd, how were you able to do that?  Are you cutting into FMLA time, or did you just have a ton of vacation saved?  Teach me your ways lol.  

(I'm planning to work right up until the end, but a work end date is looking so attractive since the actual labor date is a big fat )

flowerpower5838

whiska said:

For people taking some time off work before your edd, how were you able to do that?  Are you cutting into FMLA time, or did you just have a ton of vacation saved?  Teach me your ways lol.  

(I'm planning to work right up until the end, but a work end date is looking so attractive since the actual labor date is a big fat )

I'm working til the end, but ultimately it's a crap shoot. Some start FMLA if they can get their doctor's to sign off on it, some states provide leave on the front end of a due date (CA and NJ are two that come to mind), some work in countries that have actual paid leave (cough @failuretofly you lucky dog cough) and most are likely just taking vacation time leading up to their leave. Don't forget that many women here have RCSs planned so it makes it a bit easier to plan an end date! 

anewadventure

@whiska for me, i'm not really taking time off early. RCS is tuesday. have to run around and do pre-admission labs on monday. so my last day is tomorrow. 

first pregnancy i was in your boat. it's tough having no clue within a 4 week window when you'll go into labor! you want to maximize your time off AFTER your LO is here. 

weaver15

@MJDsquared oh my I completely forgot about that. The DH has a shirt that has Schrute farms on it. 

failuretofly

@flowerpower5838
How un-Canadian of me 

@whiska to be fair though, I'm only starting my maternity leave 1 week before my due date, I took vacation to allow me to be off for 2 1/2 weeks before. 

It's so crazy cause here it's like "omg don't go off early, you'll have to be back to work before baby's first birthday, and you wouldn't want that!" So most women do still save vacation!

kyrwyn

@whiska I'm in California and we're allowed up to 4 weeks before our due date on disability (SDI), as long as the doctor writes you a note.  I can't imagine spending 4 weeks at home WAITING, so I took just two weeks off.  My OB's office wrote me a medical note a few weeks ago, I filed it with HR, and then when I file for SDI the doctor's office will fill in their relevant info for my claim -- it's apparently all available online and "should be simple."  If you don't use the 4 weeks before your due date, you can't add them to your SDI claim after the baby's born (which is 6 weeks if vaginal or 8 weeks if c-section), so I'm technically "leaving time on the table" but I'm fine with that. 

California has its own FMLA equivalent called CFRA -- and if my HR lady is to be believed, then it doesn't overlap with the time allowed for by SDI.  They are separate protections.  She told me yesterday that my 2-weeks pre-baby and my first 6 weeks post-baby will be disability, and then I'll transfer into "bonding time" under CFRA and since I'm only taking 6 weeks of that (for a total of 12 post-delivery) then I'd have the other 6 weeks to take later in the year. 

Which sounds like witchery.  And I'm never 100% sure my HR lady is right about things until they actually work out that way.  I also have a ton of vacation saved (8 weeks PTO).  So if my HR lady is wrong about any of this, I'll be covering my time off via PTO after my disability claim expires.  

Marley629

@whiska In NJ, you can take up to 4 weeks off prior at 60% of pay through the state. I did that with DS1 but I was bored out of my mind. It did cut into my FMLA time, but I work for a very family friendly company that will not let me go for going over my FMLA time so I was in a good position to do that. It is definitely not a good business practice for companies to let woman go for taking longer than the allotted 12 weeks but Unfortunately some companies need to for work flow.  This time I chose to work from home for 3 weeks and then use a week of my vacation time since it's use it or lose it that will take me right up to my c-section date. 

weaver15

Do we have a breastfeeding thread? If so someone tag me? If not here is my random, I have 3 melada breast pumps and want to try a different one through my insurence. Anyone have suggestions of any they like? 

Marley629

@weaver15 I used the medela last time but this time at the recommendation of many here, I opted for the Spectra 2.  I'll try to find the pump thread but I can't  remember if it was a dedicated thread or in one of the FTM questions for STM threads. 

failuretofly

Oh! I also just learned as of December 3rd I can legally take 18 months instead of a year at 33% of my pay (about $1200/month) if I want... you guys really need to move to Canada. 

Marley629

@failuretofly I tried to convince DH to move to Canada after DS1 Was born (and again approximately a year ago for reasons unrelated to maternity leave haha) but it was a no-go. So jealous! 

mdcd44127

whiska said:

For people taking some time off work before your edd, how were you able to do that?  Are you cutting into FMLA time, or did you just have a ton of vacation saved?  Teach me your ways lol.  

(I'm planning to work right up until the end, but a work end date is looking so attractive since the actual labor date is a big fat )

I saved 2 weeks vacation specifically for this purpose. I would have had 3 weeks, but I took a week off for a trip I didn't end up taking (right after I found out I was pregnant), so it was a total waste of vacation time. For me (in MA) short-term disability doesn't kick in until the day baby is born, followed by Childcare Leave/FMLA.

ETA: Not knowing my actual delivery date did make it a little tough to plan, but I have 2 weeks' worth of personal and sick time, so even if I go overdue (my OB promised me she wouldn't let me go past 2 weeks) I don't have to go back to work, I just burn through the rest of the time I'll lose at the end of the year anyways.

babytimeagain

@failuretofly I wish I could move to Canada. That would be my dream!

failuretofly

@hellothere47 what's stopping you?!

babybison

I'm in NJ so we're similar to @kyrwyn. I get 4 weeks disability before, 6 weeks after, and then 6 weeks family leave after that. I think you have to use all your company time first, but my company doesn't offer benefits so I have no time. 

On an even more random note, the squirrels have started eating my corn stalks and gourds, which I'm totally excited about because I love animals, but they're making a mess on my front steps. 

whiska

Thanks everyone for the insight!!

@Marley629 I can definitely see getting bored being at home, which is why I haven't pursued this seriously.  But I just realized that if I actually liked my job I would work until the end, but I think things have gotten so stressful with my boss that I'm looking for ways out.  She is borderline abusive and after the majority of our interactions I feel so upset with my blood pressure up and me shaking and then I have to 1) calm down for me and baby's sake and 2) try to refocus to get things done.  So I'm just like, there has to be some way that medically we can classify this as a bad situation and I can get out of here sooner???

I could go ahead and take some sick time.  It just means I don't get paid for the last two weeks of leave.  Which seems silly/self-indulgent when I could work for a few weeks now AND get paid at the end of leave.  My edd is 12/7 and I'm thinking about telling them my last day is 12/8.  Just to settle something more definite on the calendar.

whiska

Question about board organization...
I'm 100% in favor of keeping the birth announcements thread clutter-free, but where do we post congratulations or put chatter about the labor and delivery experiences?  I know the lovetits kind of act like Congrats, but for those of us who have been hanging out together this whole time we might want to comment and have a back and forth?

I was going to ask on the birth stories thread but didn't want to muck up @jlemons-2's thread in case we want to keep that strictly to each member telling their birth story

anewadventure

@whiska my 2 cents? that's what jlemons' thread is for. although not everyone will be gung ho enough to post both places. you can also send PMs or i guess even comment in the FB group for whom that applies to. it's HARD to not comment on the birth announcement thread, i feel you  

MJDsquared

Anyone else notice that it seems like TB is a statistical anomaly?

I think it's something like statistically, only 10% of women have their water break before they get to the hospital (something like that, not gonna Google the specifics). I feel like everyone on TB had their water break elsewhere. Or maybe only the ones who did are the ones who talk about it?

Also, my OB said that there's a 50% chance I'm still pregnant on my due date. So basically it's 50/50 whether I go early or late (put the due date on either end there, I don't care). And I always thought FTMs were more likely to go late. But I've seen so many FTMs say the went before their due date (even when you don't count multiples or scheduled c-sections/inductions due to complications it seems like there are a lot).

I'm very stranger danger-y, but I swear I'm not suggesting anyone is lying, lol. I just find it fascinating.

jlemons-2

I think the birth stories thread is appropriate for all sorts of congrats and chatter. 

jlemons-2

I think the birth stories thread is appropriate for all sorts of congrats and chatter. 

whiska

@MJDsquared Were you temping the cycle you conceived? I read about a study where they measured how long it took until spontaneous labor from ovulation, and 50% went by 38w2d from ovulation. 

Super long blog post here:
https://evidencebasedbirth.com/evidence-on-inducing-labor-for-going-past-your-due-date/

It does seem like more people have their water break than the commonly cited 10%!

MJDsquared

@whiska I was temping! Now I have to go calculate that...

Well, I got my due date of 12/30. My due date based on ovulation would've been 12/28, but we went with 12/30 based on an ultrasound. When I count 38 weeks & 2 days from ovulation I got 12/30. (I shouldn't have had to count that, I should've been able to just realize in my head that it would've been 12/30, haha.)

elcd458

Y'all. I begged DH to take me out for Mexican food tonight. I ate so much that I had to lie down when I got home. Now I can't get up because my hips hurt.  Don't know what I'll do once my phone dies 

splsmama2016

@MJDsquared with DD1, i had her a week early And didn’t know my water broke. But yes, statistics show that 10-12% of moms do have their water break on its own. 

weaver15

@MJDsquared with my first I went 2 weeks over due 0% effaced and 0 dilated. 

muskratbaby

I somehow spent over $100 grocery shopping at Aldi tonight. It's just me and my husband. A typical bill is around $60. "I better get 2 of everything" NESTING!! 

anewadventure

muskratbaby said:

I somehow spent over $100 grocery shopping at Aldi tonight. It's just me and my husband. A typical bill is around $60. "I better get 2 of everything" NESTING!! 

that's actually impressive. when i break 100 the cashier always notices, haha! 

whiska

@MJDsquared Sounds like your dates are right on!  I always ovulated closer to CD17/CD18, which was true my last cycle.  So the LMP I gave my ob is what it would be if I o'd on CD14 as they assume when they calculate edd from LMP (my RE told me it was fine to do this; she said if I tried to explain cycle days and ovulation to ob staff it would be a dead end )  Baby measured on track from this adjusted date on every ultrasound.

ETA So using o date I'm crossing my fingers I'm in the 50% that would go by 38w2d, so 12/9!

MJDsquared

@MJDsquared I didn't ovulate until CD 21, so I'm glad offices don't just automatically go by LMP anymore!