UO Thursday 9/14

peachy13

rainbowdashh

I don't know why everyone is obsessed with Joanna Gaines' style...

peachy13

@rainbowdashh yeah, i agree with that. Granted I've watched the show only a handful of times but it always seems like they do the same sort of thing to each house.

I guess this ties into an UO of mine which is that I actually don't really care for decor that is straight out of HGTV or pinterest or wherever. Similar to my thoughts on weddings, I think it's way more interesting and far cooler to just be creative and figure out your own style rather than copy everyone else's. My BIL and SIL swear by HGTV and their house is decorated with all the current trends. It looks fine but I think it lacks personality in my opinion. 

elcd458

@rainbowdashh  I like it, but it's definitely become the PSL and Ugg boots of home decor. BASIC.  I also think there's a time and place for this type of design, as simple as it is.  As in, I don't know why people want their uptown loft/beach condo/brick McMansion to look like a farmhouse on the inside? It'll be interesting to see how long these trends stay popular. 

blueskies17

@rainbowdashh I like some of her stuff but damn she is obsessed with shiplap! 

rainbowdashh

Shiplap has no place in southern CA lol. 

I have no room to talk because I have no style, I just don't love the farmhouse look. I'm more of a "mismatched furniture that will last until my kids are old enough to not destroy it" kinda person.

Amber_Waves

Elf on the Shelf is creepy. Never gonna do it. 

kyrwyn

I had no idea what shiplap was... google taught me this: https://thecraftsmanblog.com/no-joanna-thats-not-shiplap/
  

babytimeagain

I actually live in Waco where Fixer Upper is filmed, and I just don't get the appeal. Every house she designs ends up looking the same, and the city of Waco honestly sucks. I've lived here over a year now and can't wait to move on.

I think it's hilarious that people were freaking out about their new line over at Target- trolls on social media were saying what an unchristian company Target is (b/c of the bathroom controversy), and they were mad that Chip and Joanna were doing a business deal with them. People need to get a life!

ameliabedelia-2

Elf on a shelf is totally creepy. And I had never heard of it until the last few years, mostly from friends that don't live in the DC area. Is it more a regional thing? Is it new?

My UO is that I don't really care about DD using electronics. She's 3 and can fully navigate around the iphone/ipad/fire.  When I was pregnant with her, I had this huge aversion to her having anything battery operated or electronic...but then I came to terms with the fact that's the world we live in. She is going to be using (and expected to use), those things every day of her life. I figure I might as well monitor how often/what she's watching/playing than try and shield her from it completely. It was sort of freeing once I gave up on the idea that she'd only be playing outside or with wooden blocks and puzzles for x amount of years. It took the pressure off me to feel like I always needed to be entertaining her. I still have friends that are very "screen free" and they claim it's working out fine, but she seems to be learning a lot from some of the shows/games she watches and I get a little sanity when I get home from work and have to do chores/cook.  I think in 20 years, there won't be a big push for kids to be screen free...we are sort of this bridge generation that has seen life with and without it, but our kids won't ever know the difference. 

breezybee

I think it's a little strange when people post in HDBD when I've never them seen post anywhere else lol. No one this week, but there have been some where I'm like...

ameliabedelia-2

I guess my other UO is that I love Joanna Gaines! Lol, I get her magazine and like her style. I think their show is sort of boring and everything looks the same, but overall I like her clean/simple designs.  

ameliabedelia-2

@kyrwyn, mind.blown.

babybison

Since the house we bought last year hasn't been updated since 1973, we've been slowly making improvements everywhere. And whatever we're doing, DH will tell me Joanna Gaines says we can either get [insert item here], french doors, or shiplap. Could be new carpet, could be a full-sized dishwasher, but french doors and shiplap are always the other options. 

rainbowdashh

Screens forever. Not all day long, but I need some time for me. And if that means they watch the iPad, fine with me! Also totally agree that the future is moving towards electronics and technology, not away from. My kids can use an iPad better than my mom lol

peachy13

regarding Elf on the Shelf, ugh. I don't know. I don't really want to do it but I also don't want my kid(s) to feel left out if all their friends have an elf. Christmas is fucking epic when you're a kid and I don't want them to have any doubts about Santa and Christmas magic for as long as possible. So, maybe I'll do it. Who knows. What does annoy me though are the parents who have their elves randomly give presents. WTF are you doing to everyone? Now some little kid is going to brag at school how their elf gave them a cool toy and my kid is going to think her elf is a cheapskate. Let's just keep presents for Christmas, no need to turn the month of December into a bigger circus than it already is (especially since most of us are going to have to celebrate our kids' birthdays in this month).

kaylawing

@rainbowdashh and @ameliabedelia-2 I'm with you on the screens thing. I try to limit it as much as possible, but if twenty minutes of YouTube kids playing OldMacDonald lets me get dinner on the table, I'll take it. Some of my friends are pretty hardcore about it, but I just can't/don't care enough to be strict with it.

 

ameliabedelia-2

@peachy13, so I saw this fbook post the other day about an idea for wrapping 25 books, one for each day of December before xmas, and then having your kid open one each night to read before bed.  I mean, I support reading to your kids at much as anyone, but 25 books in a month? Not only is that expensive, it also seems to enforce this idea that you should be getting gifts all month long. And who the hell has all this room for tons and tons of new books every year??

elcd458

@breezybee  LMAO. I know exactly who you're talking about and I think the same thing every week!

breezybee

Hahahahaha @elcd458 you just made me laugh out loud 

kyrwyn

@ameliabedelia-2 My family is German and we did Advent calendars as kids.  Small gifts each day were a part of my holiday experience, but they didn't come from an elf and often they were little more than a single piece of chocolate.  My favorite Advent calendar was one where each door had a small ornament that we hung on the tree together -- I still have a few of the ornaments, and my brother has a few more.  When we lived next door to a Hungarian family, we cleaned our rooms and cleaned & set out shoes out for St. Mikulaś on Dec. 5 -- who filled them with a little tütte of oranges, nuts and chocolates. 

I am hoping to share these traditions with my kid, and the stories from around the world that go with them.  I think there's enough really cool world heritage around winter holidays to not worry about the latest invented holiday fad.  My mom also had a great pre-Christmas plot she enacted every year before Thanksgiving.  According to mom, the Christkindl, St. Mikulaś and Santa will not bring presents to little children who already have full rooms.  First we had to chose some toys and things to give away to other children, to show the holiday spirits we could appreciate their gifts.  I was most of the way through elementary school before I realized that not every one had to clean their room or give things away at Christmas.  

babytimeagain

@kyrwyn I've never heard of the tradition of clearing out your room to show appreciation, but I love that sentiment. I'll have to remember that one!

kyrwyn

@hellothere47 I'm pretty sure my mom made it up, in order to make sure our rooms were clean when out of town relatives came to visit.   But I'll totally steal it.  "Don't believe me? Go ask your Oma..."  

whiska

@ameliabedelia-2 I've seen that on pinterest too and I'm just like, what?  We're opening presents on Christmas Day.  And when the families get together for our official celebrations.  That's it.  It's not get-a-gift-every-day month.  I agree that 25 books times how many years = A fuckton of books????  Also I love wrapping presents, probably more than most (it's my favorite holiday to-do!), but that's a lot of waste as far as wrapping paper goes...

ETA @kyrwyn I know a lot of families do advent calendars so the small piece of chocolate every day doesn't phase me.  In fact I have no problem making it a month of chocolate grazing and cookie making  But giving or receiving a lovingly-picked gift has deep meaning to me and I want to pass that on to my kids.

I've thought the elf story was crazy weird since he first got super popular a few years ago.  H is hardcore anti-elf, but the thing is I like his retro/vintage kitschy look.  I can see us getting one to put on a shelf with the other Christmas decor, and for our kids to see it, but not give it a name or backstory or purpose or do the "look what that zany elf got into last night!" thing. 

I agree that the JoGa aesthetic seems pretty generic and stale at this point.  But I don't want to throw shade at people who follow it because it's a really easy way to decorate.  Meanwhile, I'm over here 4 years after moving in to a bedroom with no matching furniture, no curtains, no walls painted -- all because I haven't had time or energy to consider what creative looks like to us or what fits our personality.  

My UO is I prefer talking on the phone.  Please just call me.  I'm too lazy for texts. 

disneyfan0511

There will be no wrapping 25 books in this house, what the crazy is that? Who comes up with these things and who is like, amazing idea. That's a big no. 

Elf on the Shelf - you say now you won't do it but when your kid enters preschool/elementary and all the kids have one... you might change your mind. We do the elf, it's fine, we do NOT do the elaborate insane, Pinterest crap. The elf just moves each night, if we remember... He doesn't arrive until St. Nick's day and brings the girls their Christmas PJ's for the season. 

My UO? Pinterest has ruined parenting. At first I loved Pinterest, now, I think it's a pile of BS. It just sets unrealistic expectations for how things should be... As if us parents aren't under enough pressure already. So over it.

skc040512

I guess my UO is that we don't/will continue to not do Santa at Christmas. 1. Because *I* go to all of the trouble of shopping and wrapping gifts, so I want the credit (we do small stockings, but they're tradition and from mom and dad). and 2. Christmas isn't about Santa. So we also won't be doing elf on the shelf. He's creepy AF, and I'm too lazy anyway...

eazybreezy225

Pinterest sucks.
Elf on the Shelf is super overrated.
And 25 books is far too many.

We follow the rule of 4 when we do our holiday shopping, we save a lot of money doing so because it keeps us from getting carried away.
Each child gets: something they want, something they need, something to wear, and something to read.
I can't take the credit for this, I saw it on Facebook a couple of years ago and never looked back. We had tried all kinds of tactics, such as a spending limit per kid, or a specific number of gifts per kid. But it was often such a challenge trying to make everything even for everyone.

UO:  i hate it when parents give their kids live animals as gifts. They have a much higher chance of being resold, abandoned,or given away, than pets that weren't given as a gift during a holiday (usually easter or christmas). I think a lot of it has to do with people not being totally prepared or committed to caring for the animal. 

failuretofly

@ameliabedelia-2 I actually did that last year with DS and it was great. However I have no intention of getting new books this year, I am going to wrap the same ones year after year, maybe upgrade a few here and there to more age appropriate ones. They will still be special because you will literally only get to read each book once a year!

@whiska omg please do not fucking call me. Like ever. Absolute hate. 

@Skcobb we will be doing *minimal* Santa as in... each kid will get 1 gift from Santa and the rest are from mom and/or dad etc. 

I'm too tired from work today to think of my own UO lol

rainbowdashh

You know I love someone if I answer a phone call from them lol

MJDsquared

I love shower games. Granted I've only been to two wedding showers (one being my own) and zero baby showers, but damn I loved the games both times.

I also agree that Pinterest is the worst. I mean, I definitely use it for recipes and crap, but curating my entire life like that is not for me. In that vein, no thank you to the super themed cute birthday parties for kids. IDGAF if that's your thing, but I grew up with birthday parties at the pool with a sheet cake or when I was older sleepovers with a DQ ice cream cake and I effing loved them. And my mom didn't have to bake or craft or decorate.

ETA: Like I said the other day, I'm lazy and I'm sure I'll take the "easy route" for many other parenting things aside from birthday parties.

elev2017

I'm planning to steal the advent book idea and use it for Hanukkah instead. I think 8 books seems way more reasonable than 25 and they'll actually just be part of the nightly gifts. I know most people LOVE Christmas, but not having to think about things like the elf or Santa make me pretty relieved those are non-issues for me and my family! My biggest concern will be not making the house smell like oil and potatoes for weeks on end lol.

darkfyre

@leilagphillips you can make the latkes at my place. I don't care if the house smells like oil and potatoes for a month!

Mandayno

@kyrwyn I love that you brought up these traditions!!! My family is German too, and I also grew up with MANY of these traditions. Advent calendars were always a must, and we always got them from Oma!! I can't wait to share some of these with my LO! 

cait5413

Like @kvacmak said, I think some (maybe most?) people who do the 25 books thing re-use books they already have, adding maybe one new one a year. You could even do library books, and stick then in a gift bag. Use the same bag each night! I don't think we will do this, but there is a way to make it doable.

We are also trying to follow the something they want, something they need, something to wear, and something to read plan, with a few extra gifts from Santa. 

And I am also on the no-elf bandwagon. So creepy. 

MJDsquared

I've read about kids getting bikes for Christmas from Santa and then at school their friends who have less money get something cheaper from Santa (and then it's like why does Santa like this kid more?) so I'm definitely going to stick to probably one gift from Santa, and it will be a less expensive one. Anything expensive will come from us. I love the idea of want/need/wear/read. My mom buys us all six million presents every year though so I'll have to figure out something there... I don't want to get my kid four presents but then my mom buys everyone like 20 lol.

kyrwyn

I also love the want/need/wear/read idea. We often got new PJs for Christmas, and got to open (and wear) them on Christmas Eve.

Marley629

My UO is tho creepy, I love elf on the shelf as a tradition.  I started it with my son was an infant (not nightly then because he had no clue) but I took a pic of the elf watching over him in his crib sleeping so I can tell him later on that his elf was with him since he was a baby (Yes I totally realize how creepy that sounds haha) but last year we got into it and DS loved seeing the elf in a new hiding spot every morning and i saw a noticeable change in behavior when the elf was "watching". 

kyrwyn

@Marley629 Off topic, but is that a monsters inc mobile? So cute.

Marley629

@kyrwyn yes!! One of my favorite movies it made for a super cute nursery for an infant BUT totally wasn't thinking ahead to his toddler days when he would tell me he couldn't stay in his room because there were monsters in there...ummm because he was totally right hahah 

elcd458

I'm loving this holiday discussion and ideas!  I can't stand it when I see friends on FB who have gotten their kid like $800 worth of crap from Santa, plus all the other stuff from family.  I don't even have room in my house for all of that nonsense, sorry kid.  For anyone here who is looking for some alternatives, I read a version of the want/wear/need thing that relates it to the Christmas story of the magi bringing gold, frankincense and myrrh to the baby Jesus which seemed like a cool idea-- so I'm thinking Santa will bring 3 gifts: a want (gold), a wear (myrrh), and a need (frankincense). I thought that was a cool idea for anyone who didn't want to scrap Santa completely but wanted the giving to be meaningful/relatable to the season if you celebrate that part of it! 

I also love the idea of leaving donations for Santa-- a good way to get kids to part with stuff they don't play with anymore.

Growing up, our Santa gift was the thing we wanted most, plus candy in the stocking, then we had one other gift from mom and dad.  My ILs, although they don't do expensive gifts per se, go wayyyyyy over the top on the physical quantity of gifts given to the grandkids and I don't foresee that changing just because I disagree, unfortunately.  They also say all of those gifts are from Santa which bugs me.  One SIL lives close by my MIL/FIL and the other is always here from out of state, so they've had no issue pretending Santa came to grandma's house instead-- but I just can't get into it.  I want my kiddo to have Christmas morning here with DH and I, at our house!  I don't expect everyone to suddenly change their traditions to make my kid happy, since niece and nephews are older and these habits are well-established by now, so DH and I are having a hard time knowing what to do.  Guess we will have another year or so to really figure it out 

skc040512

On the Santa topic, my parents always told me and my sister that Santa didn't work for free.. parents had to pay for the gifts and delivery, so some kids got more from Santa because their parents paid Santa to do all their shopping