Sleeping Babies

Rhubarb7216

I don't think we have a thread devoted to this topic yet, and now that some of us have had our babies, I thought it would be helpful to have a place for advice/discussion on this topic.

Specifically, I'm hoping some STMs might have some advice for a sleeping issue with my son. He is about a week old now. Our plan was for him to sleep in a bassinet in our room for at least the first 3 months or so, and then at some point move him to the crib in his room. First day home from the hospital, he napped in the bassinet and slept in there at night without a problem (of course waking up to eat periodically). Second night home, he hardly slept at all. Third night, he slept well again. The fourth and fifth nights (last night was the fifth night), he would not sleep in the bassinet for more than 20 minutes or so, if we could even get him to settle down in there at all. My husband ended up holding him the whole night while sitting in the glider and I got up to nurse him periodically. Obviously, my husband holding him is not a long term solution, nor is it safe since my husband falls asleep while holding him. I'd really like him to reliably sleep in the bassinet - the only other safe option is the crib and if he doesn't like the bassinet, I don't think he's going to like the crib either! He sleeps really well during the day and mostly for daytime naps we have him in the mamaroo because it's on the first floor of our house, where we spend most of the day, and the bassinet is on the second floor. I'm thinking to try to get him more comfortable with the bassinet I should have him take more naps there...does that make sense? We also have been going back and forth between swaddling him with his arms in and his arms out and I'm thinking arms in should be more effective for the bassinet. Thank you for any ideas/advice you have!

lap018

Are you swaddling him? That really helped my DS sleep soundly in his bassinet, I've heard too that putting them in something like the rock and play helps because it's slightly elevated and feels like they're being held but then you could run into issues when you want to transition to a flat surface like the crib. He will adjust, I would definitely swaddle if you aren't doing that, it keeps their Moro reflex from waking them up! Also we sleep with a box fan on have you tried running some kind of white noise? It's pretty noisy in the womb and newborns like that soothing sort of background noise

eta wow somehow I missed the last part of your post, I would keep swaddling arms in because it really keeps the swaddle tight! He may fight it at first but it should help! He sleeps better in the mama roo because it moves and sort of hugs him while the bassinet is just flat, if you do more naps in the bassinet I think it would help but then he might not nap as well. Ahhh baby sleep, the most frustrating thing to figure out, but you will get there! 

JustBored10

The only thing that worked for my DS was getting a rock and play so he slept upright. He hated the crib and bassinet and it got to the point where he only slept on us for almost two weeks until we got the rock and play. The transition from that to crib was a disaster though so we are really going to push sleeping in the bassinet with this one. Good luck mama! 

Rhubarb7216

Thanks @lap018 and @JustBored10! We do use a white noise machine and usually also have the fan or air conditioner on, so plenty of noise for him! We have a rock and play we got as a hand me down, but technically I don't think it's supposed to be used for sleeping at night, so I'm afraid to use it. We'll keep working on the bassinet, but if that doesn't work we may have to try the rock and play! I have to remind myself he's only a week old and we are first time parents, so it's going to take some time to figure out what works. It's just frustrating because he had a couple good nights in the bassinet so we know he can do it. I think he got too used to the coziness of the mamaroo.

jessieR358

We used a sleep consultant at 13 months because we couldn't figure out the sleep thing haha. The main thing ill be doing differently with this baby is putting him down drowsy! At a couple weeks old I wouldn't stress too much. 

mamaofthegarden

DD1 slept in the bassinet, swaddled, no issue. 

DD2 would not settle down in the bassinet, swaddled or not. She ended up sleeping in the rock'n'play. It was a tough habit to break (she didn't successfully transition to a crib until 6
months) but it was the only thing that worked at the time!

good luck!

coffee-2

Definitely swaddle with arms in at this age. Reflux could also be a factor. None of mine would sleep on the flat mattress but we bought an incline to place under the mattress and it helped a ton. 

ColoradoHiker

Fwiw, DS1 slept much better with arms out than in!  He fought the swaddle from the first moment he was born, until we did it with arms out.  

The others covered most of what I would suggest pretty well.  I know it's popular, but I recommend doing your research before using things like the rock n play long term and unsupervised.  Not just for safety concerns, but a lot of friends had a hard time getting the babies to transition to the crib later on.  We kept DS in his crib from day 1, and used the pack n play for naps during the day when he was tiny.

Try checking how warm or cold your LO is when sleeping.  I believe the rule of thumb is to check the back of their neck for sweating or if it is cold to the touch.  Also, the usual recommendation is plus one layer from whatever you are wearing.  Babies thermoregulate poorly at this age, and they don't sleep well if they're too warm or cold.

Last-  you have a newborn.  It takes them a little while to sort out their sleep cycle, and they can confuse day and night sleeping.  Congrats on your new baby, momma, and let us know how your LO is doing soon!

lilpoots

How good are his naps? If he is sleeping a lot, he may be reversed in his day night sleep cycles. It is super common. Also babies are really crappy at sleeping in general, so give it some time and then expect some hiccups. 

Every baby is incredibly different, which makes giving sleep advice difficult. There is no one size fits all. Definitely try to do what is safest, try to be consistent, but also do what you need to do to get through. 

I do agree that swaddling with arms in is a good idea and white noise is helpful. If you trust your pediatrician, they may have some advice.

Rhubarb7216

Thanks everyone for your advice! Yesterday I got him to nap in the bassinet 3 times during the day - one was just 40 minutes, but the others were close to 2 hours. I was feeling optimistic he might sleep better in the bassinet last night, but he didn't. I wasn't able to get him to sleep there for any length of time until 6 am - apparently he hates the bassinet when it's dark out. We are swaddling him with arms in now and that was helpful for his bassinet naps yesterday, but didn't seem to help the night issue.

When we were at the pediatrician on Saturday, the NP we saw suggested he might have days and nights mixed up and told us to make sure to keep things bright and noisy during the day and quiet and dark at night. We have been trying that, but I think it still takes a little while for it to help. We also won't let him sleep for more than 2 hours at a time during the day. Sometimes he will wake up on his own before the 2 hour mark and sometimes we have to wake him up. He will sleep at night if one of us is holding him, but otherwise he's not happy. He falls asleep nursing, I put him down in the bassinet and he'll be quiet for up to 10 minutes, but then he gets upset.

I know he's still very young and I can't expect him to sleep reliably or predictably, but I just want to avoid getting into bad habits early on (e.g., him getting used to us holding him at night to sleep).

lilpoots

https://www.preciouslittlesleep.com/baby-sleep-what-is-normal/

This may or may not be helpful to you just as a reference.

sarahufl

DD slept in her crib at night from day one with few issues. It took her about 4 months to nap in there, which was super annoying. She napped great in the Rock & Play, but would scream bloody murder if you tried to put her in the crib during the day. I would try it in 5 minute increments till one day she just seemed to respond to it.

coastalmomma2

I think you've already gotten some great advice here. I took our son outside frequently on walks during the day to try to encourage the awareness of day vs. night. Also, it helped me maintain my sanity.  

In addition to everything listed above, I also swaddled DS in a blanket that I kept tucked into my shirt while around the house/nursing. Some people say that if baby can smell you, it is comforting to them. I'm not sure how much it helped, but it is certainly worth a try. 

Hang in there -- that first month is rough! 

kmac1982

DH was the baby whisperer with DS, and learned everything he knew from the book Happiest Baby On the Block. He recommends it to every expectant dad he meets, and says if they're going to read one book it should be that one. It deals with the newborn stage, and how to settle baby. It might have some useful tips and tricks for you. 

Good luck!!

jessieR358

The happiest baby on the block is a great book and works.