My toddler and her baby friend were playing in the play room. I'm sitting in the floor with them and when my husband came into the room he tripped over my feet and totally busted it.
My toddler screams "OH NO! OH NO!" and rushes over. I'm all like "awww that's so sweet!" and then she pushes her dad out of the way to check on the toy he fell on.
DS1: Mama, I'm going to make you a grandma! Me: Not for a long time, Buddy! DS1: No, I'm going to visit you, and you'll be a grandma, and I'll visit for two more minutes, then go to my home. But not for a long time! Me:
DS1: Mom, Alex is crying again. Me: I know, he's grumpy today. DS1: Don't worry, I got this. Me: Thank you, you're a good big brother. DS1: I know. Me:
Also, DH and DS1 are playing Zelda: Ocarina of Time and now DS1 is running around calling everything the Tri-fore-es (Triforce) and that Ganadorf (Ganandorf) the bad man is trying to steal it. I'm amused and proud.
My son pops up out of bed the other morning and barely opened his eyes before saying "ICE CREAM?" while pointing to the kitchen. What were you dreaming about, kid?
Oh, I can't wait for DS to talk. Well maybe I can. I'm afraid I am raising one of the kids that never shuts up. He is constantly babbling nonsense with a few words I can recognize sprinkled in. Sometimes he uses a stern voice and I can tell something has displeased him He seems to have a good sense of humor so I'm curious what will come out of his mouth.
"Okay mom. You work on not putting noodles in my soup, and I'll work on not telling you it's yucky." - After ONE noodle snuck into his soup yesterday and I told him he was being rude about it. Eddie, age 4
DS at 4: "Are there roller coasters in heaven? I bet there are because Heaven is a fun place. But they won't be scary and I won't be scared because Heaven is fun and roller coasters on Earth are too scary."
DS at 5: "Mommy, if the baby farts in your tummy, do you fart too?"
Also DS at 5: "Mommy, I'm wearing my rain boots to play in the sprinkler because they're for when it's wet outside!" he says as he's emptying the flooded boots for the third time.
@mississippicatfish he talks about death a lot. It has subsided since he feels more of an understanding, but it's on his mind frequently. My mom had to put her dog to sleep and he wanted to know and understand everything about the process. That one was a bit harder to make 5yr old friendly. He's very introspective.
@MississippiCatfish Omgoodness!! DD said almost the exact same thing! DD: "Mommy, I want to die." Me: "What??" DD: "I want to die on a cross so that I can go to heaven like Jesus." Me: *thinking to myself* (We may need to revisit our approach to this...)
Also recent: DD: *In a fussy voice* "Daddy! My banana keeps getting smaller!" DH: "Well that's what happens when you eat it."
~Ziggy
Me:27 (diagnosed anovulatory May 2016) DH:29 (normal) Met 2008 | Dated 2010 | Married 2012 TTC#1 since June 2015 June 2016- 50mg generic clomid CDs 5-9 w/TI | 2 follies (14 & 12), thin (2.45) lining | BFN July 2016- 1mg estradiol CDs 1-7, 50mg generic clomid CDs 5-9 w/TI | 2 follies (14 & 10), thin (~4) lining | BFN August 2016- 1mg estradiol CDs 1-7, 50mg generic clomid CDs 5-9 w/TI | BFN | Referred to specialist, visited once, was told we have less than a 3% chance even on medication, recommended to IUI for up to a 50% chance, decided not to pursue at this time | Stopped "trying" October 2016- We became licensed foster parents November 9, 2016- Arrival of DD#1, 4yo March 1, 2017- 1 day late, feel like crap (low fever & exhausted) | Mom suggested test before taking meds, I laughed but did it anyway | BFP! *shock*
@zigzag8412@mariposa_767s I pictured myself being this mom that is like, "Sure sweetie, we can talk about all the tough topics!" And I do...but I want to say, "Dude. No one's dying. Let's talk about this in ten years." They ask tough questions for being so little!! I was glad to be able pretty much guarantee he won't die on a cross?
Dinner time is always a battle with my 5 year old. She's so damn picky. Last night she said "Mom, why do you keep making such disgusting dinners that aren't my favourite?" I made a chicken and asparagus pasta bake that I thought was delicious. Apparently it was "disgusting". I asked her what SHE would prefer I make because I make healthy meals and she said "Whatever I'm in the mood for. Ask me every day and I'll tell you." Insert brow raise here.
DS2: Mom why do boys have knickers? Me: Knickers? Like underware? Everyone wears it. It helps to keep you clean. DS2: (seriously annoyed with me). No mom, Knickers (points to his nipples). Me: Oh nipples! Yeah...ummmm....not sure but your normal...boys have them! (trying hard not to laugh).
We started potty training DS last week. He gets an m&m if he pees in the potty. The other day he ran into the bathroom but I was helping DD so couldn't go watch him. I hear the toilet flush and he yells, "I did it!" and comes back and I give him an m&m. Later I went into the bathroom and see pee on the floor. I ask him, "Did you pee in the potty or on the floor?"
So, a few weeks ago DS asked where poop and pee come from and why we do each one. We have a great book on poop but I simplified it all and told him that when we drink water, that makes us pee and when we eat food it makes us poop. (He loves that poop book with all his little heart though).
Tonight at dinner he sees me take a bite and gets this horrified look on his face. I asked him what was wrong and he said:
If eating makes us poop does that mean the baby in your tummy is just eating your poop all the time?!?!
Also, he thinks the baby on my "Sprout" app is a real-time look at what this baby is doing and always wants to check my phone to see what she is up to, haha. He refuses to believe me when I tell him it's not really our baby.
When DS2 was 3.5 when I picked him up from preschool:
DS: Mama, does Miss Pam eat babies? Me: *horrified* What?? No!! Why would you ask that?? DS: She said she has a baby in her belly, and things go to your belly when you eat them. Me: *trying not to laugh at how adorable he is* oh, no, that's not how babies get there. Don't worry, she doesn't eat babies. DS: Well, then how do babies get in bellies? Me: (oh, poop! I don't want to have this conversation right now) Do you want to go get ice cream?? DS: yes!!!! End conversation!
DS2 age 5: "sometimes people have bones inside them." yup, they do.
DS1: Mommy, all boys have a penis. Me: Yup, that's true! DS1: Me, and Alex, and Daddy, and You! Me: Nope, buddy, I don't have one. DS1: You don't! Me: I'm a girl, girls don't have a penis. DS1: (silence for 5 minutes)
DS just weaned in March. Today he saw me changing and asked me for a hug. He just grabbed each of my boobs, hugged them and said "miss you boobies!" Didn't try to nurse, just said hi like they were old friends lol
Me: okay, time to get ready for school. DS2 (age 5): I don't want to go to school. Me: Buddy, you have to go to school, it's Monday. DS: *Bursts into tears* you didn't tell me it was Monday!! I don't want it to be Monday!! Me: me neither, buddy, me neither!
@BayCamp basically roflol at work right now... I think that takes the cake fore my favorite. But @ooodalollly is a pretty close second!
DD asked me the other day if the baby's going to drink milk from my "belly" when s/he gets here. (She's been in foster care since three years old and I'm pretty certain has never seen breastfeeding as the only siblings she's ever had were foster children as well and were bottle fed. She witnessed my god-baby's mama breastfeeding her newest kiddo the other day and was fairly confused... That was a fun conversation...)
~Ziggy
Me:27 (diagnosed anovulatory May 2016) DH:29 (normal) Met 2008 | Dated 2010 | Married 2012 TTC#1 since June 2015 June 2016- 50mg generic clomid CDs 5-9 w/TI | 2 follies (14 & 12), thin (2.45) lining | BFN July 2016- 1mg estradiol CDs 1-7, 50mg generic clomid CDs 5-9 w/TI | 2 follies (14 & 10), thin (~4) lining | BFN August 2016- 1mg estradiol CDs 1-7, 50mg generic clomid CDs 5-9 w/TI | BFN | Referred to specialist, visited once, was told we have less than a 3% chance even on medication, recommended to IUI for up to a 50% chance, decided not to pursue at this time | Stopped "trying" October 2016- We became licensed foster parents November 9, 2016- Arrival of DD#1, 4yo March 1, 2017- 1 day late, feel like crap (low fever & exhausted) | Mom suggested test before taking meds, I laughed but did it anyway | BFP! *shock*
Re: STM+ sh*t my kid says
My toddler screams "OH NO! OH NO!" and rushes over. I'm all like "awww that's so sweet!" and then she pushes her dad out of the way to check on the toy he fell on.
Me: Goodnight, little love. Sweet dreams.
DD: Goodnight, Mommy. I'll miss you when you die.
Thanks, DD. Slept really well last night.
Me: Not for a long time, Buddy!
DS1: No, I'm going to visit you, and you'll be a grandma, and I'll visit for two more minutes, then go to my home. But not for a long time!
Me:
DS1: Mom, Alex is crying again.
Me: I know, he's grumpy today.
DS1: Don't worry, I got this.
Me: Thank you, you're a good big brother.
DS1: I know.
Me:
Also, DH and DS1 are playing Zelda: Ocarina of Time and now DS1 is running around calling everything the Tri-fore-es (Triforce) and that Ganadorf (Ganandorf) the bad man is trying to steal it. I'm amused and proud.
"You don't look fat but you act fat"
"I don't want to ever have a baby because I don't want to throw it up."
"If a princess farts, does she fart into a tissue?"
DD1 at various ages.
Me "why not?"
Ds "my tummy is too big!"
DS at 4: "Are there roller coasters in heaven? I bet there are because Heaven is a fun place. But they won't be scary and I won't be scared because Heaven is fun and roller coasters on Earth are too scary."
DS at 5: "Mommy, if the baby farts in your tummy, do you fart too?"
Also DS at 5: "Mommy, I'm wearing my rain boots to play in the sprinkler because they're for when it's wet outside!" he says as he's emptying the flooded boots for the third time.
DS1 is 7. DD is 1. DS2 is coming in late April.
DS1 is 7. DD is 1. DS2 is coming in late April.
DD: "Mommy, I want to die."
Me: "What??"
DD: "I want to die on a cross so that I can go to heaven like Jesus."
Me: *thinking to myself* (We may need to revisit our approach to this...)
Also recent:
DD: *In a fussy voice* "Daddy! My banana keeps getting smaller!"
DH: "Well that's what happens when you eat it."
Met 2008 | Dated 2010 | Married 2012
TTC#1 since June 2015
June 2016- 50mg generic clomid CDs 5-9 w/TI | 2 follies (14 & 12), thin (2.45) lining | BFN
July 2016- 1mg estradiol CDs 1-7, 50mg generic clomid CDs 5-9 w/TI | 2 follies (14 & 10), thin (~4) lining | BFN
August 2016- 1mg estradiol CDs 1-7, 50mg generic clomid CDs 5-9 w/TI | BFN | Referred to specialist, visited once, was told we have less than a 3% chance even on medication, recommended to IUI for up to a 50% chance, decided not to pursue at this time | Stopped "trying"
October 2016- We became licensed foster parents
November 9, 2016- Arrival of DD#1, 4yo
March 1, 2017- 1 day late, feel like crap (low fever & exhausted) | Mom suggested test before taking meds, I laughed but did it anyway | BFP! *shock*
Married 9-19-2009
Baby Karrot 2.0 - 6.25.2015 - He's here! Via VBAC @ 36 weeks.
Me: Knickers? Like underware? Everyone wears it. It helps to keep you clean.
DS2: (seriously annoyed with me). No mom, Knickers (points to his nipples).
Me: Oh nipples! Yeah...ummmm....not sure but your normal...boys have them! (trying hard not to laugh).
Tonight at dinner he sees me take a bite and gets this horrified look on his face. I asked him what was wrong and he said:
If eating makes us poop does that mean the baby in your tummy is just eating your poop all the time?!?!
Also, he thinks the baby on my "Sprout" app is a real-time look at what this baby is doing and always wants to check my phone to see what she is up to, haha. He refuses to believe me when I tell him it's not really our baby.
Me: But Mommy is a girl.
DS: *sadly* But I want you to be my boy.
He's also told my fiance "You're an asshole" because he wouldn't make him cookies. That didn't go over very well for him.
When my 2 year old says prayers at night he says, "God bless EddieBoy, HowieBoy, FrankieBoy, DaddyBoy and MommyBoy." Just one of the gang, I guess!
DS: Mama, does Miss Pam eat babies?
Me: *horrified* What?? No!! Why would you ask that??
DS: She said she has a baby in her belly, and things go to your belly when you eat them.
Me: *trying not to laugh at how adorable he is* oh, no, that's not how babies get there. Don't worry, she doesn't eat babies.
DS: Well, then how do babies get in bellies?
Me: (oh, poop! I don't want to have this conversation right now) Do you want to go get ice cream??
DS: yes!!!!
End conversation!
DS2 age 5: "sometimes people have bones inside them." yup, they do.
Me: Yup, that's true!
DS1: Me, and Alex, and Daddy, and You!
Me: Nope, buddy, I don't have one.
DS1: You don't!
Me: I'm a girl, girls don't have a penis.
DS1: (silence for 5 minutes)
DS2 (age 5): I don't want to go to school.
Me: Buddy, you have to go to school, it's Monday.
DS: *Bursts into tears* you didn't tell me it was Monday!! I don't want it to be Monday!!
Me: me neither, buddy, me neither!
is a pretty close second!
DD asked me the other day if the baby's going to drink milk from my "belly" when s/he gets here. (She's been in foster care since three years old and I'm pretty certain has never seen breastfeeding as the only siblings she's ever had were foster children as well and were bottle fed. She witnessed my god-baby's mama breastfeeding her newest kiddo the other day and was fairly confused... That was a fun conversation...)
Met 2008 | Dated 2010 | Married 2012
TTC#1 since June 2015
June 2016- 50mg generic clomid CDs 5-9 w/TI | 2 follies (14 & 12), thin (2.45) lining | BFN
July 2016- 1mg estradiol CDs 1-7, 50mg generic clomid CDs 5-9 w/TI | 2 follies (14 & 10), thin (~4) lining | BFN
August 2016- 1mg estradiol CDs 1-7, 50mg generic clomid CDs 5-9 w/TI | BFN | Referred to specialist, visited once, was told we have less than a 3% chance even on medication, recommended to IUI for up to a 50% chance, decided not to pursue at this time | Stopped "trying"
October 2016- We became licensed foster parents
November 9, 2016- Arrival of DD#1, 4yo
March 1, 2017- 1 day late, feel like crap (low fever & exhausted) | Mom suggested test before taking meds, I laughed but did it anyway | BFP! *shock*