IVF with donor eggs

JamieH2000

@chitown16- how is it going? I hope the fluid resolved itself and you are transferring any day now!!

@cmiller73- I definitely remember you from other groups. Sorry you are here with us, but there is lots of hope in Donor eggs! Feel free to ask us any and all questions!! I don’t have any recommendations on agencies since I went thru am in house Donor. But I know some of our other ladies here did use an agency! Hopefully you will be able to find someone you like soon! 

laurad75

@cmiller73 Welcome.  I'm sorry you find yourself here but this group is a wealth of DE knowledge. 

I was at Boston IVF and they gave me a list of agencies that they worked with.  We ultimately used Northeast Assisted Fertility Group which is a little more expensive than some of the others but that's where my girl was.  

c-town18

Transferred cancelled!!  It's been a terrible week. I recently was tested for the BRCA gene mutations (unrelated to my fertility treatment, I just wanted to have it done because of family history) and found out 8 days ago that I have the BRCA2 mutation which greatly increases risk of breast and ovarian cancer (my grandma died at 41 of breast cancer).  So then I wanted to get a mammogram and breast MRI done quickly before my transfer as that is recommended annually for BRCA positive women and I was paranoid because I had not been doing heightened screening in the past since I did not know about the mutation before.  Mammogram came back clear but they saw something small on the breast MRI and they want to biopsy it before I potentially become pregnant.  Radiologist believes it's benign but wants to be sure because if it is early cancer the increased hormones from pregnancy could cause it to grow. So I was instructed to stop all meds and we will regroup once we know results of biopsy next week.  FML.  And the cherry on top is that at my lining check on Monday my lining and bloodwork looked perfect for a transfer.  

rachelh0912

@cmiller73 welcome! These ladies are the absolute best and have always had the best answers and support! Good luck as you begin the process!!

@JamieH2000  still a few more days until ERA results right?! Hoping for good news!

@radmom27 getting so close to transfer day! So excited for you! 

@ChiTown16 I hate that you had a fluid issue! What did your RE end up saying about it involving your cervix?! 

AFM- I have been a TERRIBLE poster lately due to a busy hectic schedule! I’m so sorry but I hope that everyone is doing well! I’m STILL on Lupron. I had an appointment Wednesday and I actually had a flare effect from the Lupron so we’re pushing it back another week or two. UGH. So ready for a real shot at this! It’s all so frustrating! 

c-town18

I am meeting with my RE in a couple of weeks once we know results.  I am kind of paranoid about putting all this estrogen in my body yet AGAIN since I know that is not good when I am already at heightened risk for cancer.  Has anyone ever done a natural cycle prep for transfer?  Nurse has said that might be an option but says the timing is harder.  I will discuss with RE assuming this fricking biopsy is normal and we are clear to move forward.  Ugh. 

laurad75

@ChiTown16 I'm so sorry.  That's incredibly frustrating.  I hope your results all come back clear quickly and you can get started again soon. 

JamieH2000

@chitown16- omg what a horrible weeks you have had! Seriously haven’t you been thru enough with all of this? I am praying that the biopsy is just fine and you will be on your way soon. A natural transfer is totally possible. I did a stimulated natural transfer. Some clinics like to schedule FETs, but I would hope they can make an exception in your case! Thinking of you and hoping this is the last bump in the road! I guess one silver lining with DE is you don’t have to worry about passing that gene on...

@rachelh0912- delays just suck! That is crazy the lupron gave you a flare with those higher doses!! Hopefully you are only pushed back a little!! When is your new date?

c-town18

laurad75 - Thanks Laura.  Any update on your end?  I could really use some good news from somebody!   Aren't you going for another U/S soon if not already? 

The crazy person in me wanted to skip the MRI even though it was strongly recommended and just plow forward with the transfer despite the BRCA result.  My sister made the point though that the goal isn't to just crank out a baby asap, the goal is to have a baby and actually be healthy and alive to see him/her grow up. She of course is right.  I need to make sure there isn't something serious going on with my health before I try to get pregnant. 

rachelh0912 - Hang in there!  Ugh, I hear you on being frustrated.  

cmiller73 - Welcome!  Let us know if you have any questions as we're always happy to share what we have learned/experienced in all of this. 

radmom27 - I'm taking your approach and drinking lots of wine this weekend.  

JamieH2000 - Are you in Hawaii right now? 

c-town18

JamieH2000 - My thoughts exactly.  I couldn't even get a PGS normal embryo period with my own eggs.  I never would have gotten one that was not only chromosomally normal but also BRCA negative (there's a 50-50 chance of inheriting it), as I would be testing embryos for that now if I were using my own eggs.  Makes me feel even more glad that I used DE. 

rachelh0912

@ChiTown16 your post hadn’t shown up before I posted mine! I am SO SORRY. I know how devastating that can be.. My sister is actually dealing with the exact same thing. I know words don’t make things better but I am so pulling for you and hoping things get sorted out quickly and you can move past this! 

laurad75

@ChiTown16 Yes, my ultrasound was on Monday and everything looked great.  Baby was very active and is measuring ahead of schedule.  It was such a relief.  

cheerfulboots23

@ChiTown16 I am so sorry to hear.I know that's annoying. I really hope all the tests come back okay. Keep your head high. I am wishing nothing but positivity.

radmom27

@cmiller73 Welcome to the board!! I'm in RI so not that far away.  I did my donor cycle with CT Fertility with an in house donor.  One of my friends also did a donor cycle there recently and currently is pregnant.  
@ChiTown16 WHAT???  I just let out an expletive at work when I read your post about being cancelled.  I'm so so sorry that you're going through all of the BRCA stuff in addition to fertility stuff.  
I've done one natural transfer and aside from it requiring more monitoring and less meds, it wasn't that much different.  The only frustrating thing about it, is that you won't know your transfer date until really close to the transfer.  
Wine helps with everything.  Absolutely everything
@rachelh0912 Ugh.  Any delay after going through this whole process feels like 10,000 years.  Did you mean that you were having an endo flare?
@JamieH2000 I hope that Hawaii is amazing!

prudence9-2

@ChiTown16 I’m so sorry to hear that!!! I’m probably also a BRCA carrier but have been refusing to test until I have a baby because my doctor told me she’d want to remove my ovaries if I’m a carrier. So far I’ve had every type of biopsy there is and 2 surgeries... and every time I put the estrogen patches I’m thinking how this is probably not good for me. 

I hope this cyst turns out to be nothing. The fact that it doesn’t look suspicious in the MRI is a good sign. 

AFM... I’ve been following this thread for a while now. I have a feeling that I’ll be joining you all here on Monday after my WTF Appt... ****TW**** I had 4 PGS normal embryos and now I have none. Last BFN I got was the first one after an ERA tweak of 12 hours. So I was really hopeful that embryo will be the one. But it wasn’t. *** END TW***

A quick question... I know most of you are doing fresh DE. And I understand the benefits. But I’m 42.5 (almost) and at this point my goal is one baby. So does any of you know how many embryos you get from 6-8 eggs? I see that most places will promise 1 embryo. But in reality, do you think you mostly get 2 embryos?

rachelh0912

@JamieH2000 I don’t have a new date yet because I’m waiting for AF to show while on Lupron! My RE said he suspects AF by Wednesday but I’ve learned that my body will probably do the opposite of what we suspect/hope! Haha I’ll get my new date when/if AF shows! Hopefully soon!

@radmom27 My RE said that instead of suppressing my ovaries, the Lupron stimulated me which he has seen before! I had 2-3 large follicles at my last u/s! He said usually after I get and estrogen surge from the Lupron that things will drop off and I’ll end up with the same results as most women, it’s just taking me an extra step! I’m very frustrated but I do want it to be as good as we can get since we only got one embryo from our donor! 

@prudence9-2 I am (eventually) doing a FET from DE! I got 6 to begin with that we’re frozen and 5 survived the thaw! All 5 fertilized but only 2 made it to blasts! We did PGS testing and ended up with one normal out of the two! My donor was actually older than me! Haha 

prudence9-2

@rachelh0912 that’s great that you were also able to do PGS and got a normal one! Can I ask which bank you used?

cmiller73

Thanks ladies. Currently looking between Tiny Treasures and NAFG. Hoping to get back on the board more often once we get through filing taxes ... the bane of all of our existences I am sure, but at least you can deduct some IVF costs. Hoping this gets us in a better position to move forward quicker!

Sorry to hear the bad news @ChiTown16 the meds we put into our bodies on this quest constantly freak me out. I do second the wine therapy.... and cookies. For me, tough news and baked goods / wine go hand and hand. 

@laurad75 WOOHOO on that u/s  

radmom27

@prudence9-2 I went back and forth between fresh and frozen donor.  I was lucky enough to have insurance coverage but strangely, my insurance only covered a fresh donor cycle and would not cover frozen donor eggs at all.  I was most definitely open to either.  In hindsight though, I've already failed with 2 PGS normal embryos so I'm thankful that I still have some others to try while I try to figure out why I keep going wrong.  If I didn't have insurance coverage, frozen embryos were more economical. 
I hope you get some answers at your WTF appointment.  I think the road to getting to donor eggs is hard, but once I made the decision, I've never looked back.  I just want one take home baby.

prudence9-2

@radmom27 that’s wild that fresh DE was covered but not frozen! 

My WTF appt is tomorrow. So I’ll know more in less than 24 hours. 

radmom27

@prudence9-2 I totally agree...I could not believe that they wouldn't even entertain frozen but then said fine for a fresh.  It sounded like complete insanity to me (and not cost effective from an insurance standpoint).  Keep us posted!

prudence9-2

@radmom27 just because I went thru 4 PGS normal embryos and I’m back to square 1, I kinda feel like fresh DE might be a better choice for me. But I’m all out of pocket and my goal is one baby. So I’ll ask about frozen DE if it gets to it tomorrow. 

JamieH2000

@prudence- good luck today and I hope your RE has some good ideas. Have you considered using donor embryos at all? If your goal is just one child and you need a sperm/egg donor, that may be the most cost effective option? Also, have you looked into a reproductive immunlogist like Braverman or Kwak Kim? I feel like  after 4 PGS normals, it just can't be the embryos. I know at least 3 girls that saw Kwak Kim (in Chicago) and were able to have success. She will be my next call if I have another failed transfer probably. 

@rachelh0912- come on AF! SO Much waiting in this process is just torture!!

AFM- I had a bit of a rough Friday (even though I was on the beach!). My nurse emailed me to schedule a follow up call about my ERA results, so I knew it wasn't good. The not knowing what was going on gave me sooo much anxiety. I gave in and emailed my RE who actually emailed me back on a friday evening. Apparently my results was post-receptive, which is attypical according to her. I have never seen anyone on these boards get that result. Most ladies need 12-24 hours MORE of progesterone, not less. So hopefully I can schedule a call this afternoon to go over the results with my RE on the phone. I'm guesssing we are going to have to repeat to make sure I am receptive earlier than normal, since its just such a rare result. Here I was thinking my transfer would be 5 weeks from today... but probably not until April can't believe I started the DE last April and I am still not pregnant... This was supposed to give us fast success, but has led to the most heartbreak yet

laurad75

Oh @JamieH2000, I'm so sorry that this continues to be more complicated.  I'm praying for you. 

In regards to frozen donor eggs not covered by insurance, that's actually pretty standard.  I was told to anticipate the possibility of some coverage with fresh eggs and no coverage with frozen.  Frozen eggs are usually less expensive and easier to coordinate since the donor has already done the ER but in most cases you will get a set of around 6 eggs so after fertilization waiting to see how the embryos develop you are likely to end up with less.  Many clinics offer a guarantee program where you pay a flat fee for everything and if the cycle fails you are refunded a portion. 

With fresh, its certainly more complicated to sync cycles but you are more likely to end up withe more eggs and then more embryos.  

prudence9-2

@JamieH2000 Yes, I definitely thought about DE and even started looking at profiles of women at some banks.  As for immune issues, they did do some immune testing on me and blood clots and everything came back good. The only thing that needed change was another 12 hours of PIO.

As for your ERA, have they told you how many hours? if it is 12 hours, they might just tweak your protocol without doing another ERA. If it 24 hours, they will probably do another ERA. 
When I did ERA, they did 2 biopsies, one of them on day 5 and one on day 7. But since my day 5 came back as needed another 12 hours, we ended up not testing the biopsy from day 7. So I think it is the same case if it is 12 hours the other way...

@laurad75 Since my goal is one baby, I think frozen makes more sense. But knowing that I did have failures with 4 PGS normal embryos, I wonder if it is ME that causing all these failures and not the embryos.

I had my WTF Appt with the new doctor as mine is on her maternity leave. Basically, he thinks its my embryos. As all my tests were good and we did ERA to tweak that last cycle... But with that said, he still thinks I have a chance with my own eggs as I was responding well to IVF before.... He told me that if I want to use DE, he would recommend frozen DE as my goal is one child.

I am going to use a new sperm donor this time around. I started wondering if there was some problem with my match to that sperm donor that was causing some of the failures. 

JamieH2000

@prudence9-2 - that is interesting they think its the embryos despite the PGS normal testing! I don't believe PGS is everything or anything like that, I just wonder what they think its wrong with them besides a Chromosome issue. Are you leaning one way or another after the consult? As far as my ERA, I am not able to to talk to my RE until Wed now so hopefully I will get more info then. I am not sure if a post receptive result comes with timing or not... just hope the next 48 hours pass quickly so I can get some more answers.

prudence9-2

@Jamieh2000 he said that embryos of older women might stop being viable and not make it to implant... I'm a little confused because even though he still thinks nothing is wrong with me and it is the embryos, he still thinks I have a chance with my own embryos. I'm thinking to try one more IVF. But as I type these words I wonder if that is a mistake and I should just got with DE.... 

The nurse already sent me an IVF calendar.... so if I start, I start very soon! 

As for the ERA, I think POST ERA does come with result. Because when I did the second ERA on day 7, the idea was that if day 5 is 24+ hours PRE, then they will have another point to compare... and see if the day 7 was 24 hours too late or only 12 hours too late...

So hopefully you only need 12 hours tweak and in that case, you will most likely not need another ERA... 

fivetimesnoluck

@prudence9-2 coming out from lurking to offer my experience with frozen eggs. After five losses with natural conceptions and my own eggs, I started working with an RE who specializes in RPL and who did extensive testing on immune system issues and other root causes. Eventually, I opted to use frozen donor eggs to try and conceive. We used My Egg Bank and received a lot of six eggs, of which all thawed, all fertilized, and all made it to blast. We did not do PGS testing. We implanted two on May 1 and TW: one implanted and I am holding my perfectly healthy nine week old daughter right now. She was born about 6 weeks early, but that was due to pre-eclampsia linked to the issues we believe led to my previous losses. Despite being early, she had no significant complications. We have four embryos in storage. End TW

Of course it is a personal preference but for me, frozen was more economical, less complicated due to fewer moving parts and therefore much faster. I ordered my eggs at the end of March and had our transfer about 5 weeks later. Needless to say, I'm thrilled with my outcome. I think level of success depends on on the clinic you use and the embryologists and their experience level. If they have a depth of experience and familiarity with frozen eggs, then your chances of having a good result are higher. My Egg Bank has affiliate clinics that have been certified in their recommended techniques and therefore offered a guarantee on the thaw. They didn't guarantee any number of embryos, but we came out ok anyway. 

I haven't been very active lately but still lurk here and have been rooting for everyone. It was five years ago yesterday that I found out I was pregnant for the very first time. I never thought it would be so painful or challenging and definitely never thought it would take so long, but we persevered and made it to the other side of infertility. I hope for the same outcome for each one of you here. 

prudence9-2

@fivetimesnoluck congrats!!!! I remember you from last year! So happy it worked out for you! Did you have any immune issues?

I have to say that you are giving me so much hope! Thank you so much for sharing! 

Having 6 eggs make it to blast is amazing! I checked My Egg Bank but they don't work with my clinic, so I'll have to check if I can still use them. 

This week I will have to decide. But I'm thinking to try one more IVF cycle and then one FET (assuming I will have one embryo) and if that fails, even if I have more embryos left, switch to a frozen DE.

radmom27

@JamieH2000 This is a post I found talking about people who got post receptive on their ERA (at least one woman made some adjustments and had a positive outcome). 
https://ivf.ca/forums/topic/104281-era-results-post-receptive
I'm hoping you don't have to repeat your ERA and can move on to transfer.  
@fivetimesnoluck CONGRATS on your new little peanut.  It's nice to hear success stories of people that are on the other side. Thanks for rooting for all of us.

JamieH2000

@fivetimesnoluck- Congrats! Wow that time went fast!! How exciting your baby is already here. So happy to hear your daughter is doing well!! 

@prudence9-2- It is a hard decision! I know I agonized over it, especially when the RE is saying you have options and its your choice! Hopefully thinking on it for a few days will tell you which way to go!

@radmom27- thanks for finding that post! Its good to hear others have had success.  I am really just hoping the next day goes quickly so I can talk to my RE and find out the specific results. Nothing is just ever simple in this journey and the decisions are so hard! Are you getting excited for your transfer in 2 weeks?! You have vacation coming up soon too right?!

prudence9-2

Thanks @JamieH2000 one of the toughest things about IF is that you don’t have all the answers and have to make a decision without knowing why things happened. 

Hope today goes by as by as quickly as possible and that you get more answers tomorrow!

radmom27

@JamieH2000 Only one more day until you get to talk to your RE and get some answers and a plan!  I hope you get some good news.  I have my lining check tomorrow and I'm a little freaked out.  I'm just hoping that they don't see fluid like they did last cycle.  

rachelh0912

@JamieH2000 Hoping for nothing but comfort and confidence from your appointment tomorrow! Let us know how it goes!!

@radmom27 Hoping you have an awesome appointment as well! FX for great news and the go ahead to keep things moving! Yay!! 

@prudence9-2 I’m sorry it took so long to get back to you! We used an in house donor so things went very quickly and smoothly! I’ve heard great things about other banks too!! 

JamieH2000

Thanks ladies. Unfortunately the clinic called today and my RE has the flu. I think I am just cursed. Hopefully she is better by Friday since I am supposed to stop the pills on Monday if we are going to start a cycle...just so tired of limbo  

JamieH2000

Ladies- I also meant to ask when some of you were talking taxes earlier... I am wondering if anyone got definitive tax advice on if the donor fee and agency fee count as a medical deduction? I have googled a little and asked my financial coordinator at my clinic and she didn't know. I am actually a CPA and they def don't cover this My guess is that its not deductible as a medical expense and only the IVF/Meds part is?

laurad75

@JamieH2000 I included it on all our expenses but I'm not sure it will be eligible for deduction.  I will let you know when we submit to our accountant.  

BTW, my siggy has a TW now.  I don't want to be insensitive to this group so I wanted to ask if I should put it in the spoiler.  

prudence9-2

Oh no @JamieH2000 sorry for the delay... hopefully you’ll hear back by the end of the week!

c-town18

JamieH2000 - Ugh, hang in there. Glad you got some info but I hate that you're in limbo.  Also re: tax deduction, I cannot find a straight answer but please let me know if you find anything out for certain. My accountant didn't know off the top of his head. 

laurad75 - I don't mind your siggy!  Gives me hope  

prudence9-2 - Do you know if the sperm donor you used in the last cycle has produced any live births in the past?  It's such a tough call, one more cycle with your own versus moving on to DE.  I really struggled with it and second guessed myself a lot but I am at peace with my decision now. 

AFM, had my biopsy today and hopefully results tomorrow or Friday.  If results are clear I could maybe still do a March transfer according to the nurse I've been emailing with.  We'll see. 

prudence9-2

@ChiTown16 yes, he had confirmed pregnancies. Even though I have one vial left, I’ve decided to at least switch donors. I also read about DQ Alpha and it made me wonder if he’s just not a good match for me. 

I will go ahead with one more IVF cycle with a new sperm donor, followed by one FET (assuming I’d have any embryos!). And I’m thinking if the first FET fails, to re-evaluate and even if I have more embryos, maybe go directly to DE. 

JamieH2000

@prudence9-2- yay for getting started again soon! Maybe if you have two or more embryos you can transfer 2 at a time?

@chitown16- Praying SO hard for good results from your biopsy for you, hopefully today!! Thinking of you and hoping you can get started ASAP with no other issues/delays!