What You Might Do Differently

ForwardnBackward

This might be tailored for S+TMs to respond but would be a good read for FTMs.

What do you think you might want to do differently this time in regards to your pregnancy, labor, and post partum/newborn stage?

ForwardnBackward

1.  I won't have my provider strip my membranes.  It was uncomfortable and I think may have contributed to my water breaking without being in labor yet which lead to induction.  I'm gonna practice patience if possible.

ForwardnBackward

2. I really wanna prep freezer meals this time.  I think that would've been helpful

dogperson11

Last time I didn't get dressed in the hospital until the afternoon we went home. I instantly felt human when I put on real clothes, so I plan to get back into real clothes in the hospital ASAP this time.

beezeee

+1 to freezer meals! And I'd like to be more organized and motivated (maybe not the right word) this time. I was such a blob last time, spent so much of my time laying around with DD. DH was home on summer break, so I didn't have to do much of anything really. Obviously, relaxing and enjoying baby is important, but I'd like to keep my days a bit more structured this time. At least try to get out of the house 1x per day, lol.

beezeee

@dogperson11 definitely! I labored in my own clothes (a sports bra) and wore my own stuff for the hospital stay, rather than the hospital gown, and that made me feel better and more comfortable.

lemonlyman

This might be a UO, but I definitely plan to introduce the concept of pumped bottles/pacifiers to this new baby sooner.

The nurses and lactation consultants at the hospital freaked me out so much about "nipple confusion" that I waited a week to introduce them to my son, and by that point he wanted nothing to do with either—it was mama or nothing.

I nursed him for 15 months and loved the bonding experience, but it sure would have been nice to pump even one bottle a day and let my husband take a turn feeding him!

sdarling2010

We made about 10 freezer meals ahead of time and it was the best thing we did! My mom came over and she, DH and I did assembly line cooking for a day. Highly recommend!

This time around I plan to have the lactation consultant come in multiple times and ensure our latch, the way I'm holding baby, etc is good. DD and I had such a hard time BFing that I want to do whatever I can to make sure we're on the right path before leaving the hospital. Anytime we're offered an LC I will be saying yes!

KSweet

I spent the last trimester doubling meals and freezing the second one....I had a good month's worth of meals and it was awesome.

I have dealt with gestational diabetes in the last six pregnancies but have managed to control it through diet/exercise. It's not my favorite way of eating but I generally feel very good while eating this way. My plan this time is to just keep eating this way after the pregnancy instead of having every kind of junk food I've been missing. 

jessafishy

I'm hoping to be able to not use the nipple shield or wean off of it much earlier. I think (hope) it will help my supply and baby's weight gain.

If baby has a lip tie I will get it fixed much sooner.

I will probably bedshare sooner too. I got so much more sleep once I started that.

keiraanne

Count me in for freezer meals too! Seems like a really good idea.

I'm a planner to a fault. I figure if this babe is likely going to be born in November (my EDD is October 31st), I'm going to have zero time/energy for holiday baking, so I plan on making a lot of cookies, Christmas treats, etc. in September and deep-freezing them. I imagine that there will probably be family and friends dropping by over the holiday season and it'd be nice to have something to offer them. Plus, even if no one shows up, I'll have a freezer full of cookies to eat! 

carries2018

1. Stay on top of PPD I've never been treated for it but I most def had it. 

2. Relax. With DD2 I was so set on keeping DD1 busy so she wasn't upset about the adjustment. I left the house every morning took her somewhere with a newborn strapped to me. I was so warm out. And I never gave DD2 the attention she needed. 

3. Keep the girls in school. 

4. Put a better effort forth with BFing than I did with DD2. But not be as intense as with DD1. 

5. NOT eat a big heavy meal the night before. No adding to that first poop. 

ksf13

Definitely another vote for freezer meals. I didn't think I'd need them with DD since my mom came to visit for couple of weeks, then DH took his paternity leave, but they would have been nice for when I didn't have as much help and she wanted to nurse nonstop.

I'll also be sure to see the lactation consultant this time and have baby checked for lip/tongue ties at the hospital (It was the weekend when DD was born and she was already off). DD took to nursing great and self weaned a month before her 3rd birthday (haha, may be an OMG thing for some, because had you told me I'd breastfeed past a year when she was born I would have laughed. I plan on letting this one self wean too ). We found out at the dentist appointment AFTER she weaned that she has a pretty bad upper lip tie. They were surprised she breastfed successfully and for as long as she did. I did have a lot of pain the first few weeks and she was always small; I'm almost positive her tie was the cause for both. 

I plan on baby wearing A LOT more this time too. I wore DD some, but I think it will definitely make things easier with two. 

OliveOyl2014

I want to try harder at breastfeeding. I gave up too easily with my second and I regret it. 

Another thing I want to do is not have visitors at the hospital. With my son, I was having a hard time getting him to latch. As I'm struggling to get him to feed, visitors showed up. I felt 1000x more pressured and ended up asking for formula. I regret it to this day. I should have had DH tell the visitors that they would either need to wait or come back. I just want to get settled with nursing before having people just show up this time around. 

buttercream_frosting

Take a full shower no matter what time Im going in unless it's obviously urgent. I went in because my waters broke and ended up not having a proper shower for over 48hours. I felt disgusting. So full shower, blow dry and some make up for me this time. 

Maksim's Mom

Don't let the pushy doctors rush you into pitossin to induce labor. I had no idea the contractions would be stronger and it could have been avoided if they just let labor progress naturally. 

ForwardnBackward

Another vote for babywear more.  DS didn't  care to face inward it seemed i didn't push it... but with a toddler and newborn i think I'll try harder.

ForwardnBackward

I had a decent breast milk stash when I returned to work... but I want MOAR! So I think ill try building that more aggressively earlier

riverrainez

Start pumping a little earlier to build a stash. I waited until I went back to work last time and never had a good stash and it was constant stress. I stopped BFing after 8 months mostly because I just hated pumping. I want to figure out a better relationship with the pump and make it a year. 

ForwardnBackward

I might consider IUD for birth control post partum instead of condoms.  That sucked and definitely didn't help our sex life recover.

Maksim's Mom

I'm with everyone on building a great milk stash. I had a stomach virus when DS was 13 months and my supply tanked. Thank goodness for the frozen milk. Also, I got to go on a girls spa getaway for a night and DH fed DS with the stash. I pumped while away of course. 

Boobopgirl

1) Not just freezer dinners, but freezer breakfasts and freezer snacks and freezer smoothie packs.  Breakfast has always been harder for me to manage than dinner anyway.
2) Have a fully stocked diaper changing set(diapers, wipes, butt cream, foldable changing pad, garbage can with a lid) next to the bed and another one next to the couch. Also a basket of snacks/water for me and the children and a box of distraction/books for the kids too.
3) Something I'm already doing different is staying on top ofy fitness and mental health stuff.  Hopefully both of those things will help me have a better labor (more stamina plus more ability to relax)
@ksf13. i can't tell you how happy I am not to be the only extended breastfeeding mama in this group.  BOTH of my girls are still nursing (although DD1 is nearly done and only occasionally asks at bedtime). And fully expecting DD2 to still be nursing for quite some time.

canonmom413

I will be nicer to family- I was very "I can do it on my own!!" 

I will be more active- I complained a lot and hated even walking for exercise. 

I will have more of the sex- uh, let's just say maybe 3 times the entire time I was pregnant with DD2.  

I will not rush time - this is my last. I do not want time to hurry. 

beautyundefined

-I will exercise this pregnancy
-I won't get my cervix checked weekly in those last few weeks
-I won't let anyone else influence my labor and delivery 
- I won't have an unnecessary induction, or my waters broken by the doctor
-I will buy a changing table, and a bottle warmer
-I won't trap myself in the house after the baby is born

MrsCFB

No stripping of my membranes.

Put baby in his/her own room sooner than we did with DS.

Try baby wearing...maybe, ha!

sjohns908

@beautyundefined I'm curious as to what you mean by not having your water broken by the Dr? Like at all or as a way to induce? Mine never broke with any of my 3. My 2nd and 3rd, I was fully dilated with waters intact, so they had to break them and baby came right out (literally within 10 minutes with #2 and 3 minutes with #3)

Since this is #4, I have done a lot of trial and error and got most of it down. Except this time:

-I will be more strict about visitors. I didn't allow many last time but this time will be even less knowing the post delivery cramps get worse with each baby. I'm not in the mood to visit with people when I'm in pain and exhausted

-I will be more observant of people before they hold the baby to make sure they aren't sick. With my last, my MIL was sick and she didn't say anything until after she had spent hours holding the baby at easter. So my 3 week old then got her first cold that night 

stefanirn06

I'm planning on limiting visitors in the hospital so I can attempt to rest a little. I won't be as social or a good hostess either. If family come over to visit, this mama is taking a nap! 

I don't think I'll try as hard to BF as last time. Definitely pushed me to the brink of PPD, and that's not a place I want to go to again.  

carries2018

Am I the only one who likes visitors? Haha. I get so bored and I'm so excited to show the new baby. Everyone gave us our space with dd1, H and I were like where are all the people?! 

beautyundefined

@sjohns908 my doctor broke my waters when I was 4cm dilated to "speed things up" .... even though I had just went into labor 

MamaStreeter

I made freezer meals and it was awesome!! Totally worth the work. 

Pregnancy - I did walk a ton the first time, but I want to include more vigorous exercise and strength training this time. Also, not sharing a ton of details about my pregnancy on social media like I did last time out of respect for those who have experienced MCs or struggle with infertility. Also hoping to go to the chiro this time!

Labor - not having regular checks for dilation; not having them break my water to "speed things up"; waiting longer to go to the hospital and only staying if I'm actually in active labor; hopefully avoiding the epidural this time (although it was awesome, I got it at 9cm and was really hoping for all natural). 

sjohns908

@beautyundefined gotcha. That makes sense.  Luckily my OB with 2 and 3 waited until I was ready to push to break mine, even when I had to be induced with my 2nd. My first OB did it to "speed things up" about half way through and it was miserable. Not only did it make the contractions more intense, it didn't make things go any faster. Plus I really, really hate bodily fluids, like it's anxeity-inducing. So leaking fluid with each contraction was awful (I realize that probably sounds ridiculous considering so much yuck goes on during birth, but still. The less the better)

stefanirn06

@carries2018 I didn't mind CERTAIN Visitors. I was super annoyed by my in laws though. FIL wanted to hold my baby the entire time and got snippy when I wanted/needed her back. They were over every day for multiple hours each day (since they're only a 5 minute drive away) and I thought I had to stay awake and entertain them. I didn't mind certain friends coming over or my family. I felt like they weren't as pushy and let me do my thing and only hold the baby when I was ready to give her up. But then again DD was their first grandchild, this time may be different, especially now that they know how we are as parents and what support DH and I like/need. 

TallMomma29

Get the babies checked sooner for tongue/lip ties.

Get help ASAP if I have signs of PPD again. 

Babywearing was a huge goal this time but with twins......  I dunno.  

Designmamauk

A big up to the freezer meals. I made a few of these last time and they were a god send when we didn't want to cook. Love a good crockpot meal. 

With DS, I was really on edge for the first month. Completely scared that I was going to do something unfixably wrong or accidentally hurt him. It made me unable to relax and really enjoy that period. I felt really vulnerable. If I feel the same at this birth I'm going to be sure to talk about it and ask for extra support. I think being more social in the first month will help too. 

I also want to get more "me time" in earlier. When I started adding in a morning run, trip to the nail salon, or date out I started to feel like life was finding it's new normal. With DS I waited till three months and will start waaaaay earlier this time.

jesssssr

Im hoping to labor more at home this time around. 

For the moms that are in their last pregnancy, what are you guys thinking about birth control? 

kkerner87

I will ask for the epidural sooner this time lol. I had 1 failed and had to wait forever to get the 2nd one because it was the busiest night for L&D. I almost wasnt able to get one,and I was so done from puking from the pain and being just exhausted, that i said next time i will get it sooner.
 I will also be more likely to tell people NO when they try and push a formula suppliment on me. DD had horrible latch issues and 2 nurses told me she had tounge tie and i should get it snipped if I wanted BF success. I gave DD formula in the hospital and almost had her tongue tie clipped, but something told me no. Don't snip shit on your 2 week old baby (until you *know* at least) Long story short, we kept going and nursed her successfully with no formula until 13 months old.
 Also, i am going to buy a super cute and comfy robe. A hospital gown was really hard to BF, so i just took it off from the top down. And it would be nice to wear around the house on maternity leave. Oh and make sure you GRAB AS MANY OF THOSE MESH PANTIES AS YOU CAN!! They were so great to have in those early weeks when you're still bleeding and healing. Cause lord knows there will be blood... I was surprised how much actually...

ETA the"until you know part" on the tongue tie. I didnt want to imply that it should not ever be done, I just didnt want to take 2 nurses word for it. I needed another opinion.

shan24

I'm planning on baby wearing more, for sure. 

@stefanirn06 I agree!  I know my limitations with bf and I'm ready if it fails again. I won't let myself be made to feel bad if I don't. 

@jesssssrg SO is getting snipped once babe is born. We're done done. 

carries2018

i feel like i dont have a choice. but i HATE baby wearing. but i think October baby will be easier than a May baby. i felt like i was in an inferno with DD2.

bluejeanbabi05

@carries2018 was it just the temperature that made babywearing uncomfortable or anything else in addition?

carries2018

@bluejeanbabi05 i dunno i am a mover and a shaker haha. i dont like to sit still. but wearing i feel like i need to be careful and move slower...i ain't got time for walking carefully. i am sure it has to do with the carriers i selected but since i am not really in love with doing it i didnt want to spend a million dollars on them. and i felt like it was faster to just hold the baby and use one hand for whatever i was trying to do. i mean wearing def has its benefits but i just don't have the attention span to deal with it. i wore DD1 like 3x total. with DD2 i wore her at least once a week when she was a newborn. with this one i assume i will up my game a little more.

bluejeanbabi05

@carries2018 I'm definitely concerned about the hot aspect of it. Even October can be sweltering down here. I'm going to get a couple different carriers so I have options, and pay attention to what the reviews say about how hot they get.