June 2017 Moms

Baby's First Days

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Re: Baby's First Days

  • @jesselayne8 oh I'm right there with you. DD will only be 19 months when baby is born. I have to lift her constantly. She still flat out refuses to walk on the daily. I think regardless of help you'll still end up having to lift some. I just thought some help would be better than none. Do you mind if I ask if you had any indication your incision was in danger of opening prior to it doing so?

    im stuck in the box!!
    there was a hard lump on that end that was tender so it really needed to open up to prevent a full blown infection.  It was super annoying.  Took about 3 weeks to close back up.  I showered 3x a day and kept it as dry as possible and was able to prevent any need for antibiotics.  


    TTC#1 for 19 months with PCOS and MFI IUI#3 + injectables = BFP!!!!  Beta#1-134(13dpiui) Beta #2-392(15dpiui) 
    #1 born December 2011
    TTC#2 - Beta #1 -51@10dpo Beta#2 -1353 @16dpo
    #2 born May 2013
    TTC # 3 June 2014 BFP 12-1-14
    #3 born August 2015 
    #4!!!!!!! due June 2017 
  • After reading through all of this, I'm starting to appreciate our lack of family support in some way. We won't have visitors because we don't have family in town or even family willing to travel to visit. It used to make me sad, but in all honesty, it sounds like a huge pain in the butt after reading through everyone's posts. Good luck to you all! 

    Our plan is to hire our sitter while we're in the hospital and she'll stay at our place while we're away.  I'll have to stay at least 3 nights with the c-section. When I come home, the sitter goes home. DH will return to work in about a week, then I'm on my own. I'll figure it out. I always do. 
    Lilypie Kids Birthday tickers
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    BFP #1 9/1999. DD Born 6/7/2000
    BFP #2 10/2011. EDD 7/11/12. MMC discovered 11/2/11. D&C 11/4/11.
    DX PCOS 10/2012.
    BFP#3 1/11/13. DS Born 9/17/2013
    BFP#4 9/30/17. Grow baby grow! 
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    silliegirlie143
  • JessyKVJessyKV member
    Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its 500 Comments Name Dropper
    This is our first time living 2-3 hours away from
    family.  For my other two births we lived in the same city so we had tons of visitors. I really don't mind hospital visitors because I get bored just sitting at the hospital but I will definitely still stay the 2 nights to rest and bond before I have to go home and take care of 2 toddlers as well. I cherish that time where my only job is to cuddle and nurse that new baby. 

    Our parents will drive up to stay with the kids when I go into labor and I have some friends and sitters on back up in case I go into labor quickly and need someone to watch them until our family arrives.  

    Im not sure who is staying with us for how long. We have 2 guests rooms but 3 sets of parents (mine are divorced).  I'm hoping my mom and MIL trade off and each stay a week at some point after.  They are both retired and have the time.  

    I don't mind my mom, MIL, Aunt (who helped raise me and I'm super close to) being in the room while I'm in labor but when things get serious they all have to go and it's just me and DH.  

    I bet DH goes back to work a day after I'm out of the hospital.  So he won't be much help. 
  • Honestly, I didn't mind hospital visitors either and almost preferred them to those who decided to drop by our home after we were discharged.  I felt so much more obligated to host them at home and didn't feel that way at all in the hospital.  Plus, people seemed to make shorter visits in the hospital
  • BellaO21BellaO21 member
    500 Love Its 100 Comments Name Dropper Photogenic
    edited March 18
    I'm almost positive that the hospital I will be delivering at requires us to stay for 48 hours for a vaginal delivery (which is the plan). So depending on when I go into labor, my SS will either already be with his BM or will get dropped off at my MIL's house. My parents live in Michigan, so she is going to drive down as soon as I give her the word. I will have her stay and check in with my fur babies while we are in the hospital, and she says she's staying for about a week after Victoria's born, but she will be either in a hotel or at my MIL's house. 
    I told DH I don't want anyone staying with us. 1- we don't have the room anymore (the nursery was our guest room/office). And 2- I really just want to get back to "normal" as quickly as possible. And visits are limited to certain hours of the day- no random visits, and when I kick 'em out they better go lol 

    IAmPregnant Ticker
  • We can leave as soon as 24 hrs after a vaginal delivery, but I'm planning on using the full 2 nights. If I'm a c section I'll probably go home on day 3 instead of day 4. 

    @Stankonia2014 I cannot wait to get some of that cheesecake for myself! I see it every time I work and then have to wipe the drool off my face before I do my assessments, lol. 

    I don't mind visitors at the hospital if I'm feeling well but I also have no problem telling people to gtfo if I feel shitty or need a nap. They have 12 weeks to come visit us before I go back to work so if they'll be fine.
    Stankonia2014
  • @halfthetree , we've missed your presence!
    graceriesz
  • I'm one for visitors at the hospital and home as well. I think it's such a fun and happy time and I love that it continues with the visitors. 
    neludelumamaelle27
  • I will only have my husband in the delivery room. My son will be with my parents. After I deliver her (and this is dependent on when she comes), my husband will go pick up my son. We will spend as long as we feel hanging out just the four of us. When we feel ready we'll call my parents and then alert my immediate family and like one close friend we are up for visitors (my sisters, nieces/nephew). 

    My husband will be taking two weeks off and then after that my mom and sisters will probably pop in from time to time to help when I need it. 

    It'll be summer so my 16 year niece is super excited to be a "mother's helper" for me throughout summer when I need it. 

    Teacher Momkrex-2Kylieslip24silliegirlie143
  • kensbbykensbby member
    10 Comments 5 Love Its Photogenic
    I really don't know how this is going to go. I'll want my BF, dad and aunt with me (if she can make it, she lives several hours away so depending on how fast this kid wants out) and possibly the adoptive mom. For the pushing idk if they'll let my boyfriend stay as he's only 16? I don't know what the policy on that is.
    I want to stay at least one day with baby but I'm not sure how I'll feel. I don't know, I'll either not let go of her until I have to or barely be able to look at her. After she's here I expect my grandma, BFs grandma, and my sister will come meet her. We'll take some pictures for my mom and her family I guess. I don't know how any of the paperwork is handled here or how long it will take or anything. I'll let the new parents have their time with her too, but I know BF will be really teary and attached to her no matter what so they may have to wait. To be honest it's going to be really hard and I may not be safe to go home so there's a possibility of getting sent to a psych hospital instead, which I hope doesn't happen but you never know. All of this assuming it's a vaginal birth without complications. 
    TLDR: I have no idea what's gonna happen. 
  • @kensbby, does your adoption agency offer any counseling services? I'm not familiar with the process, but there has to be something available for both you and bf either through the hospital or adoption agency or somewhere. Maybe you can mention to your OB that you want to set something up in the hospital before you leave. Mental health is as important as the other care you will receive during this process. My prayers go out to you as this must be a really difficult time. 
    Lilypie Kids Birthday tickers
    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers  
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    Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
    BFP #1 9/1999. DD Born 6/7/2000
    BFP #2 10/2011. EDD 7/11/12. MMC discovered 11/2/11. D&C 11/4/11.
    DX PCOS 10/2012.
    BFP#3 1/11/13. DS Born 9/17/2013
    BFP#4 9/30/17. Grow baby grow! 
    ~Everyone Welcome~
    Stankonia2014merryleaKylieslip24kyreno11
  • lmudralmudra member
    500 Love Its Third Anniversary 100 Comments Name Dropper
    @kensbby a lot of my birth mom friends regret letting the adoptive parents have time in the hospital.  Most say if that had to do it over again they would keep baby to themselves until they were discharged.  The AP's will have baby forever, cherish those few days in the hospital.  Don't let the agency tell you that the AP's deserve time right away, she's YOUR baby and only you have the right to make decisions intil
    you sign TPR.  They will be anxious to meet her of course but their time will come.  With my son we didn't get there until after a two days after he was born.  By that time his mom decided she wanted to go home (against medical advice she checked out) so the hospital let us stay and care for him.  I feel like having those couple of days without us helped her make sure she was making the right decision.  

    Also, each state has a mandatory waiting period before you can sign but that doesn't mean you HAVE to sign st the time.  Can I ask what state you live in?  I know agencies will tell you the minimum times so I want to make sure you have all the info.  Please let me know how I can help!
    Stankonia2014Kylieslip24
  • kensbbykensbby member
    10 Comments 5 Love Its Photogenic
    @Imudra I live in Oklahoma and am not going through an agency anything you can tell me would be a huge help! 
    lmudra
  • lmudralmudra member
    500 Love Its Third Anniversary 100 Comments Name Dropper
    So are you using an attorney?  Do you have a separate attorney from the AP's?  How did they find you?
  • lmudralmudra member
    500 Love Its Third Anniversary 100 Comments Name Dropper
    In OK once you sign it's not revocable so give yourself time before you sign.  It's permanent as soon as pen hits paper.
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