I had terrible back labor with my first and she was sunny side up- my water broke at home and contractions started immediately afterwards lasting a minute and 3 minutes apart from the start! The pain was absolutely unbearable and I labored for 17 hours before delivering her so I had an epidural. I was stuck at 7 for quite a few hours so the epidural helped me relax and it allowed me to dilate from 7-10 in an hour. I'm hoping this time I don't have back labor so I can try to labor and deliver without an epidural - I think the epidural with DD made it take forever (2+ hours) to push her out, I couldn't feel when to push or how hard I was pushing, and if I was pushing the right way (if that makes sense?). I had terrible labial tears and I really struggled to pee after the epidural was discontinued. While it was really nice to relax and push with no pain, I'd really like to try and go without one this time.
@sevenn definitly recommend a class if you want to go med-free as Plan A. I took a class offered by a local doula group that combined hypno, bradley, massage, etc. Try a local doula group or if you have a midwife ask for a recommendation. In order to give birth at the birth center we use you are required to take a class with a med-free focus bc it is the only option without a transfer.
I loved my epidurals so much I almost named my kids after the anesthesiologist.
But seriously though, the only thought I have reading all this is more to second what others have mentioned. It's great to have an idea in your head of what you want, but be open to change based on what you feel you need in the moment. Any delivery where baby and mom are doing well is a great delivery regardless of method (eg unmedicated vaginal birth, medicated vaginal birth, c-section)
I wasn't sure with DS since I had no idea what the pain would really feel like. I felt pretty good at first and they broke my water and I got "stuck" at 5cm for an hour or two. I got the epidural. An hour later I was 10cm. Nurse said the epidural helped my body relax and finish dilating quickly. I liked that I could enjoy DS' birth without any pain. I didn't have any side effects from it or any issues pushing. I only pushed for 40 minutes. I am going with the same "let's see how the pain is" mentality.
Me: 34 DH: 35 Married: July 2009 BFP: November 2012 after 2 years of TTC DS born August 2013 Diagnosed with PCOS April 2016 3 months of trigger shot with timed intercourse BFN x3 First IUI: 9/17/16 BFP: 9/30/16 EDD: 6/11/17
This will be my 3rd VBAC. I had an epi with my first VBAC, despite having every intention of not getting one. I had crazy back labor that had me screaming for the epi shortly after I got to the hospital (I was 6cm when I got there, 7 when I got the epi). Pushed for 2 1/2 hours. Recovery was... eh.
My second VBAC was a dream. I saw a chiro throughout pregnancy to encourage good positioning, and he adjusted me on my way to the hospital. Labored at home a long time (purposefully), and got to the hospital at 6/7 cm. She was born barely 2 hours later. No pitocin or anything. Recovery was a breeze. Like a PP said, the worst pain for me was the ring of fire and it was hellacious, but over in a blink. I practically danced outta that bed. Showered and peed and felt like a million bucks. No swelling from fluids, so I wasn't puffy for a day or two.
Definitely am hoping for a similar experience this time and knowing what I know about birthing without an epi, I don't think I would ask for one unless the situation were extreme.
I read the Bradley book and Ina May's book and loved them both. Watched birth videos on YouTube and read tons of birth stories. Sat on a birthing ball at home pretty much all the time once I was in 3rd tri. Made a birth playlist and tried to tune out everything around me and just stay in my zone. It was harder once I got to the hospital but it also went quick after that. I remember thinking.... oh my gosh I cannot do this for 12 more hours, thinking it would be long like my first VBAC. That was probably transition. Ha!
I felt like my pushing was much more effective without the epi and the way I felt afterward was motivating to avoid it this time, too. I do look a little shell-shocked in some of the pictures taken immediately after... like WTH did I just go through? And then that changed quickly into I AM WOMAN HEAR ME ROAR.
Homeschool mama Married 7.28.07 DS 9.16.10 DD 8.3.12 DD 3.1.15 #4 EDD 8.7.17
These stories are all so helpful! I also wonder how many women didn't get an epidural last time but will this time. I haven't read too much that way but I think it would be interesting.
These stories are all so helpful! I also wonder how many women didn't get an epidural last time but will this time. I haven't read too much that way but I think it would be interesting.
I'm more willing to get one this time going in than I was last time going in. Does that count?
It's sort of like... OK, the worst things I was afraid of (pushing wrong and getting hemorrhoids, tearing) all happened and, like, weren't that bad. I mean, I know it could have been worse since I only had a second degree tear. But I was most afraid of long-term effects.
The long term effect of the hemorrhoids is... I have to be more careful about not getting constipated because it's more unpleasant. That would have happened anyway as I got older, especially since I tend toward constipation.
The long-term effects of tearing is... nothing as far as I can tell. And that was after my stitches ripped & the hospital staff didn't catch it and I had more pain and healing time.
And I personally have no pain where the epidural went in. I have no idea where it went in, actually. Somewhere behind me that I can't see.
Me: 35 | DH: 46 MMC: 09/13 (9 weeks) DD: Born 8/22/14 Babies #2 & 3: Due dates 6/9/17 And my other love: writing
I had DS, my one and only, with no epidural. I will say my labor was relatively short, at 9 hours, which definitely helped... although I was pushing for what seemed like an eternity.
My suggestions: - I moved around A LOT and waited as long as I could handle before going to the hospital - If you don't want an epidural, tell your nurse up front. I said "please don't ask me if I want one, I am trying not to get one and I will tell you if I change my mind". She never offered, I never asked. - I didn't go to any classes specific to "natural" childbirth (I hate that term). I just went to the normal childbirth classes and kept all the pain management tools in mind. - I watched "the business of being born" which was lame because it has Ricky Lake in it but good because it sort of reinforced that interventions often lead to interventions. My DH watched it with me and was finally on board with why it made sense for us. - I read some excerpts/quotes from Ina May Gaskin's books. They are pretty hippy-ish but made me more confident. - I made a list of mantras/affirmations and repeated them to myself over and over in the weeks leading up to delivery so I could quickly remember them when I had to rely on them during childbirth. Happy to share those with everyone if they are helpful. - I listened to some hypnobirth stuff on Spotify but it was a little too fluffy for my liking.
It is pretty intense, not going to lie to you. However, you are completely capable of getting through it if you can get out of your head and have a labor without any unforeseen issues.
The second time around I was much more into an intervention-free labor for some crunchy reasons but also because I just really didn't want to go through the insertion of the epi again and I really wanted a shorter labor. So I read Ina May's Guide to Childbirth and I learned pain management techniques without taking any classes and talked to so many who did it. I felt extremely empowered going into labor. I knew my body was made to do this and my mind was the largest factor in whether or not I could accomplish it. It went very differently this time - from the first contraction to birth was 5 hours. I wasn't even sure it was the real deal for the first 2 hours! So by the time we got to the hospital I was already at a 7 and it was moving quickly. Honestly, at no point did I ever have that "I need drugs" moment and I have to say I totally expected to have that moment. The worst part was the "ring of fire" and that lasted what seemed like 2 minutes. I always tell people that I thank God I was planning to go med-free because there was no time for it anyway!
@lmc929 Thanks for the suggestions. I would love to know your mantras/affirmations. I think that would really help me.
My body was made for this
My body is working with me, not against me These contractions are not stronger than me, they are part of me I can do anything for one day Each contraction is one less contraction I am letting the contractions wash over me like waves My body knows how to have this baby just as it knew how to grow this baby My body is not a lemon (from the Ina May quote below)
“Remember this, for it is as true and true gets: Your body is not a lemon. You are not a machine. The Creator is not a careless mechanic. Human female bodies have the same potential to give birth well as aardvarks, lions, rhinoceri, elephants, moose, and water buffalo. Even if it has not been your habit throughout your life so far, I recommend that you learn to think positively about your body.”
@lmc929 Thanks for the suggestions. I would love to know your mantras/affirmations. I think that would really help me.
My body was made for this
My body is working with me, not against me These contractions are not stronger than me, they are part of me I can do anything for one day Each contraction is one less contraction I am letting the contractions wash over me like waves My body knows how to have this baby just as it knew how to grow this baby My body is not a lemon (from the Ina May quote below)
“Remember this, for it is as true and true gets: Your body is not a lemon. You are not a machine. The Creator is not a careless mechanic. Human female bodies have the same potential to give birth well as aardvarks, lions, rhinoceri, elephants, moose, and water buffalo. Even if it has not been your habit throughout your life so far, I recommend that you learn to think positively about your body.”
I just screenshot-ted the heck out of those mantras! Thanks, @lmc929!
@lmc929 Thanks for the suggestions. I would love to know your mantras/affirmations. I think that would really help me.
My body was made for this
My body is working with me, not against me These contractions are not stronger than me, they are part of me I can do anything for one day Each contraction is one less contraction I am letting the contractions wash over me like waves My body knows how to have this baby just as it knew how to grow this baby My body is not a lemon (from the Ina May quote below)
“Remember this, for it is as true and true gets: Your body is not a lemon. You are not a machine. The Creator is not a careless mechanic. Human female bodies have the same potential to give birth well as aardvarks, lions, rhinoceri, elephants, moose, and water buffalo. Even if it has not been your habit throughout your life so far, I recommend that you learn to think positively about your body.”
I just screenshot-ted the heck out of those mantras! Thanks, @lmc929!
Same- screen shot and favorited! I especially love the wave comparison. You'll never have that "wave" wash over you again, each contraction is one less wave of pain.
@lmc929 Thanks for the suggestions. I would love to know your mantras/affirmations. I think that would really help me.
My body was made for this
My body is working with me, not against me These contractions are not stronger than me, they are part of me I can do anything for one day Each contraction is one less contraction I am letting the contractions wash over me like waves My body knows how to have this baby just as it knew how to grow this baby My body is not a lemon (from the Ina May quote below)
“Remember this, for it is as true and true gets: Your body is not a lemon. You are not a machine. The Creator is not a careless mechanic. Human female bodies have the same potential to give birth well as aardvarks, lions, rhinoceri, elephants, moose, and water buffalo. Even if it has not been your habit throughout your life so far, I recommend that you learn to think positively about your body.”
When I was pregnant with DD, someone in one of the birth months I was following said something about labor that I never forgot. A loose paraphrase is, "my body is causing this pain, and I am not stronger than myself, therefore I can handle this pain."
Re: I Don't Want an Epidural THIS Time
But seriously though, the only thought I have reading all this is more to second what others have mentioned. It's great to have an idea in your head of what you want, but be open to change based on what you feel you need in the moment. Any delivery where baby and mom are doing well is a great delivery regardless of method (eg unmedicated vaginal birth, medicated vaginal birth, c-section)
Me: 34 DH: 35
Married: July 2009
BFP: November 2012 after 2 years of TTC DS born August 2013
Diagnosed with PCOS April 2016
3 months of trigger shot with timed intercourse BFN x3
First IUI: 9/17/16 BFP: 9/30/16 EDD: 6/11/17
This will be my 3rd VBAC. I had an epi with my first VBAC, despite having every intention of not getting one. I had crazy back labor that had me screaming for the epi shortly after I got to the hospital (I was 6cm when I got there, 7 when I got the epi). Pushed for 2 1/2 hours. Recovery was... eh.
My second VBAC was a dream. I saw a chiro throughout pregnancy to encourage good positioning, and he adjusted me on my way to the hospital. Labored at home a long time (purposefully), and got to the hospital at 6/7 cm. She was born barely 2 hours later. No pitocin or anything. Recovery was a breeze. Like a PP said, the worst pain for me was the ring of fire and it was hellacious, but over in a blink. I practically danced outta that bed. Showered and peed and felt like a million bucks. No swelling from fluids, so I wasn't puffy for a day or two.
Definitely am hoping for a similar experience this time and knowing what I know about birthing without an epi, I don't think I would ask for one unless the situation were extreme.
I read the Bradley book and Ina May's book and loved them both. Watched birth videos on YouTube and read tons of birth stories. Sat on a birthing ball at home pretty much all the time once I was in 3rd tri. Made a birth playlist and tried to tune out everything around me and just stay in my zone. It was harder once I got to the hospital but it also went quick after that. I remember thinking.... oh my gosh I cannot do this for 12 more hours, thinking it would be long like my first VBAC. That was probably transition. Ha!
I felt like my pushing was much more effective without the epi and the way I felt afterward was motivating to avoid it this time, too. I do look a little shell-shocked in some of the pictures taken immediately after... like WTH did I just go through? And then that changed quickly into I AM WOMAN HEAR ME ROAR.
Married 7.28.07
DS 9.16.10
DD 8.3.12
DD 3.1.15
#4 EDD 8.7.17
I also wonder how many women didn't get an epidural last time but will this time. I haven't read too much that way but I think it would be interesting.
It's sort of like... OK, the worst things I was afraid of (pushing wrong and getting hemorrhoids, tearing) all happened and, like, weren't that bad. I mean, I know it could have been worse since I only had a second degree tear. But I was most afraid of long-term effects.
The long term effect of the hemorrhoids is... I have to be more careful about not getting constipated because it's more unpleasant. That would have happened anyway as I got older, especially since I tend toward constipation.
The long-term effects of tearing is... nothing as far as I can tell. And that was after my stitches ripped & the hospital staff didn't catch it and I had more pain and healing time.
And I personally have no pain where the epidural went in. I have no idea where it went in, actually. Somewhere behind me that I can't see.
MMC: 09/13 (9 weeks)
DD: Born 8/22/14
Babies #2 & 3: Due dates 6/9/17
And my other love: writing
My suggestions:
- I moved around A LOT and waited as long as I could handle before going to the hospital
- If you don't want an epidural, tell your nurse up front. I said "please don't ask me if I want one, I am trying not to get one and I will tell you if I change my mind". She never offered, I never asked.
- I didn't go to any classes specific to "natural" childbirth (I hate that term). I just went to the normal childbirth classes and kept all the pain management tools in mind.
- I watched "the business of being born" which was lame because it has Ricky Lake in it but good because it sort of reinforced that interventions often lead to interventions. My DH watched it with me and was finally on board with why it made sense for us.
- I read some excerpts/quotes from Ina May Gaskin's books. They are pretty hippy-ish but made me more confident.
- I made a list of mantras/affirmations and repeated them to myself over and over in the weeks leading up to delivery so I could quickly remember them when I had to rely on them during childbirth. Happy to share those with everyone if they are helpful.
- I listened to some hypnobirth stuff on Spotify but it was a little too fluffy for my liking.
It is pretty intense, not going to lie to you. However, you are completely capable of getting through it if you can get out of your head and have a labor without any unforeseen issues.
Me: 29 DH: 35
Married: 9/29/12
DS #1: 3/8/15Me: 29 DH: 35
Married: 9/29/12
DS #1: 3/8/15My body was made for this
These contractions are not stronger than me, they are part of me
I can do anything for one day
Each contraction is one less contraction
I am letting the contractions wash over me like waves
My body knows how to have this baby just as it knew how to grow this baby
My body is not a lemon (from the Ina May quote below)
“Remember this, for it is as true and true gets: Your body is not a lemon. You are not a machine. The Creator is not a careless mechanic. Human female bodies have the same potential to give birth well as aardvarks, lions, rhinoceri, elephants, moose, and water buffalo. Even if it has not been your habit throughout your life so far, I recommend that you learn to think positively about your body.”
Me: 29 DH: 35
Married: 9/29/12
DS #1: 3/8/15I just screenshot-ted the heck out of those mantras! Thanks, @lmc929!
Me: 31 DH: 34
Married 11/09/2013
LO#1: LMP 09/14/2014 BFP 10/15/2014 EDD 06/24/2015 DS Born 06/14/2015
LO#2: LMP 09/18/2016 BFP 10/19/2016 EDD 06/27/2017 DD Born 06/27/2017
LO#3: LMP 05/16/2018 BFP 06/18/2018 EDD 02/20/2019