I grew up wearing lots of my brother's hand me downs and a gender-ambiguous hairdo. I do wish my parents would have dressed me just a tad bit more feminine. I think it would have helped me feel more comfortable in my skin as an adult woman (with ginormous boobs)
Just jumping in to say that I let me boys play with whatever they want to... and to be honest, one of my boys was obsessed with the baby dolls in his toddler and Two's classrooms... now he is all Magnatiles, Legos, Ninja Turtles and Power Rangers. I just let both of my boys do what they want... I do dress them in more traditional boys clothing but they've had pink oxford button downs and pink T-shirts, no big deal. They like to wear my shoes and purses around just as much as my husband's shoes and hats... I'll love them no matter what so whether they fall anywhere on the LGBTQ+ spectrum at any point in their life or not, I guess I'm just not all that focused on it but more focused on them as people.
@ellie111227 I should also address your question... I am mindful and use the word sex instead of gender in reference to our unborn babies, but you're right, I did go right into raising my boys in a way that was aligning their male sex to a boy gender. I'm more careful as I'm educated on the difference between the terms sex and gender but I'm not perfect, I know that...
@michaela0704 you reminded me that my son is at that stage now. He carries my little make up bag around on his arm and will slip on my glittery toms and it cracks us up. He looks so adorable. But he also slips on my husband's shoes and likes to "wear" his ties. To him they're just play objects, he has no idea. And I won't shame him for it. I've seen that and it makes me sad.
@michaela0704, my boys (2&4) each have a baby doll and they make the cutest mini daddys I've seen. . I'm with you on letting them do what they want and I try to make no assumptions on what their preferences will be. I go so far as to not use phrases like "when you have a wife someday" because I don't want them to feel that I have any expectations for them related to their sexual preference. My stepmom is extremely homophobic (she turns into a three year old and uses the word 'ewww' whenever the subject comes up) and I feel terrible for her children.
@JAGinMI I did use the word gender results many times. That is exactly what it is called on my test result sheets and that is why I worded it that way.
@LOTON01 Interesting! That would piss so many people off! I didn't have the test so I don't have a frame of reference. I wonder how many others' said "gender" on their results as opposed to "sex".
Me: 36; DH: 38 DD: 7; DS1: 4; DS2 due 6-21-17! **TW** MMC & D&C Aug 2016
@LOTON01 I was curious how many weeks too. I was only about 12 weeks when I got cell free dna done. I'm getting the anatomy ultra sound in a couple of weeks.
Maybe somewhat helpful for those worried. I was concerned about this due to recent miscarriage. NIPT came back as healthy boy. We like to overthink things so... maybe my miscarried embryo was a boy and the results of this 'healthy boy' are wrong/based on prior DNA? Genetic counselor was useless with our question. Couldn't answer it. But my doctor said that it is fine since it's been more than 30 days. They recommend not to test if your miscarriage is within 60 days though and mine was at least 90 days. Any prior DNA that is still floating around is simply too small to sample/mistake.
Previous full term pregnancies are even less of an issue because much less genetic material is absorbed by your body compared to a miscarriage.
As far as the sex though, my decor is space and science which would be the same for girl or boy so thankfully that part wouldn't matter if wrong.
Anyway, thank you for sharing. I am very curious how this did happen. I like the vanishing twin hypothesis. That would be crazy if it was just a data entry glitch of all things.
Not to put a damper on things, but if a MC happened during your previous period and you didn't know (like at 3 weeks immediately after implantation?), then that would be within 30 days. I know a lot of people are charting and paying extra attention to everything that happens around that time, but it is possible... ?
Me: 35 | DH: 46 MMC: 09/13 (9 weeks) DD: Born 8/22/14 Babies #2 & 3: Due dates 6/9/17 And my other love: writing
Hmm good point. I guess it's still a miscarriage, but maybe too early for DNA transfer. Plus I'd think the NIPT inaccuracy rates would skyrocket from 1-5% to much higher given the 50-80% of very early miscarriages. I have no idea though. Just guessing. Maybe that does account for it.
YEP!!!!! This happened to me with this baby. Not with gender but they told me my daughter had Turners Syndrome. I had to have the FISH test and micro ray from the aminiocentsis to confirm she is fine chromosomally. It's very stressful and for me it was earth shattering.
@Wearmi1 - I just saw this! (bump break) CONGRATS!!!! Sorry for the whirl wind stress.
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DS #1 born 05/25/2012 BFP#2: 06/12/2013 ---- loss DS #2 born 4/08/2014 BPF#4: 2/1/2016 --- 2/23/2016 suspected molar pregnancy--- 3/15/2016 D&E - diagnosis MM BFP#5 - 9/22/2016 * formally bornmommy
Yup, this just happened to us. I had a vanishing twin. The NIPT picked up a Y chromosome from the one that didn't develop. Then the 20 week sono showed a girl. We were very anxious because we were told it could be the vanishing twin or a rare syndrome where the baby is really male with female parts. We ran the NIPT test again at 30 weeks because by then the genetic material from the vanished twin should be gone. THe second test came back female.
Many people have pregnancies that start off with a vanishing twin and don't even know it. This can result in wrong NIPT results and a lot of unnecessary stress for parents. Take those results with a grain of salt and try to stay calm if results are off. I wish I had known before we went through this!
Re: NIPT test wrong
Edit: making no sense
Sorry for derailing this thread further.
Me: 36; DH: 38
DD: 7; DS1: 4; DS2 due 6-21-17!
**TW**
MMC & D&C Aug 2016
Orrrrr do you????
Previous full term pregnancies are even less of an issue because much less genetic material is absorbed by your body compared to a miscarriage.
As far as the sex though, my decor is space and science which would be the same for girl or boy so thankfully that part wouldn't matter if wrong.
Anyway, thank you for sharing. I am very curious how this did happen. I like the vanishing twin hypothesis. That would be crazy if it was just a data entry glitch of all things.
MMC: 09/13 (9 weeks)
DD: Born 8/22/14
Babies #2 & 3: Due dates 6/9/17
And my other love: writing
DS #1 born 05/25/2012
BFP#2: 06/12/2013 ---- loss
DS #2 born 4/08/2014
BPF#4: 2/1/2016 --- 2/23/2016 suspected molar pregnancy--- 3/15/2016 D&E - diagnosis MM
BFP#5 - 9/22/2016
* formally bornmommy
Many people have pregnancies that start off with a vanishing twin and don't even know it. This can result in wrong NIPT results and a lot of unnecessary stress for parents. Take those results with a grain of salt and try to stay calm if results are off. I wish I had known before we went through this!
and who are you??