STM+ question: second chance do-overs — The Bump
July 2017 Moms

STM+ question: second chance do-overs

STM+: what are you planning to do differently (or the exact same!) this time around? I'm talking pregnancy, infancy, gear, habits, everything. 

Our first isn't a great sleeper, so I have some grand notions about doing all the right things this time around (mainly: an actual routine).

I also vowed just to invest in a pregnancy pillow, after suffering through many sleepless nights last pregnancy. Need to get on that. 

What about you? What will change for you with this "clean slate" and your hard-earned experience?
mrscate88OperaSingerMommyalcrimmins
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Re: STM+ question: second chance do-overs

  • For number 3 I'm really going to try and just enjoy it. I'm not sure if this is our last baby or not but with the last two I was so caught up in what their next milestone would be that I didn't really give myself time to enjoy the moment. I'm also going to try to nurse longer than 8 months and lose my baby weight in a timely fashion.

    Daisypath Anniversary tickers

    Married: 05/26/2012

    DS Born Happy and Healthy via C-section: 10/04/2013

    Natural M/C: 07/08/2014

    DD Born Happy and Healthy via Emergency C-section: 06/30/2015

    BFP #4: 11/15/2016

    EDD: 7/27/2017



    mrscate88OperaSingerMommyPinkPrincessPipersupermom83
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  • **Lurker from August 17

    I am going to hire my own newborn photographer this time around. I didn't get any good hospital pics of my last baby (my princess), but have beautiful pics of both boys. I really regret not having newborn pics of my baby girl! 
    virginiaunicorn11mrscate88alcrimminsnikkiandchris
  • I'm going to wait longer before being induced and speak up more during the induction process. I was induced at exactly 40 weeks 6 days and I felt pushed by a doctor I had never seen before to get in right away when after I felt like I should have waited a couple more days. Also out of the 3 nurses one kept uping and downing the pitocin which felt awful. I will speak up more and tell them to calm down if I'm uncomfortable. 

    I will put less pressure into breastfeeding. I felt like I ruined two weeks of our lives forcing and worrying about breastfeeding.  Breastfeeding does have so many positives but formula is not the devil and I will still have a healthy child if we go that route. 

    Also this is our case but looking back I wish I hadn't waited to put ear tubes in. I was trying to find a "better" way and for us there wasn't. 

    Overall im going to try to worry less and go with the flow. There's already a few things I'm just going to wait and see how it goes. 
    lph4248mrscate88
  • I was uncharacteristically "low-key" during my last pregnancy...too the point where DH was like, "You weren't even the same person."  I'm typically very type-A.  I worked out regularly, and didn't worry about much.  I took advice from lots of STMs to make everything go as smoothly as possible, and it was great.  This time the nausea is making that harder, but I'm hoping for that to let up soon.

    During infancy, DH had trouble latching, and I put way too much pressure on myself to not give him a bottle.  He was 5 lbs. 8 oz. (born at 38w1d) when we left the hospital, and the medical staff was very insistent that I make sure he gained weight FAST.  No pressure, for a kid who wouldn't latch...they had me "cup feed" him for a while, which is ridiculous.  I was terrified of nipple confusion, and that my baby would suffer from "failure to thrive." Once I gave him a bottle, though, things were fine, and when he got stronger, nursing was simple.  He got stronger and grew, and no problems.

    Then, I stressed myself out to pump enough for three days away from him when he was 9 months old, and that was a lot.  I never even once considered he could just use formula.  I actually have no idea why I didn't even consider it...I wasn't against it.  I think this time, breastfeeding will be different because I know how it works.  I know my body will do what it needs to do, and my baby will take what he/she needs to take.

    As far as the rest goes, DS was a great baby one we figured out the feedings.  The only real "issue" was that he didn't sleep through the night, but nursed/had a bottle once or twice a night until 15 months old.  Now I realize that it is totally normal, and my friend who had the baby who slept through the night at 2 months old was way not normal.  DS had just started sleeping through at 9 months, but that's when DH had a stroke, and it messed up everything about our life and routine...it wasn't the same after that.  I'm hoping this one does not have to deal with such a huge life change.
    lph4248virginiaunicorn11mrscate88
  • @chiquita928 so sorry to hear about your husband. 

    This time I plan to get a sling to wear the baby from the start. I have a carrier that was too big at first plus it is so bulky. 

    I also want to try a different nursing pillow. I had the My Breast Friend and didn't like it. 

    I hope to exercise more. I'd like to have strong legs ready for third trimester. 

    Last time I birthed unmedicated by chance. It was something that I hoped to do but didn't believe I would. Looking back, if it goes fast again, I'd love to go unmedicated. But I know to keep my options open. 
    Pregnancy Ticker


    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    lph4248virginiaunicorn11mrscate88alcrimmins
  • One thing I forgot to mention was I had pain down there after birth. It was mainly when I carried any weight even my 7 pound baby and I was taking ibprofin until my 6 week appointment. I thought it was normal because I had just given birth. But it wasn't however it wasn't a big deal either I got some estrogen cream I just had irritation where I was healing. So looking back I wish I called at maybe 3 or 4 weeks and got in to see my doctor to fix it. Being my second this would be a way bigger deal and I'll definitely call and ask my nurse for advice. 
  • @chiquita928 so sorry to hear about your husband - that must have been really hard on him, you, and your family.  I hope you have settled into a new normal.

    @morgarita, if it's an option for you, I can't recommend a doula enough.  We cover the cost with our HSA.  I only spoke through my doula or husband to the hospital staff.  I found it empowering and it enabled me to focus on managing my pain, staying calm, breathing etc.  Also, if they have it near you, I found the natural childbirth classes (we did a 6 week stint) helpful in terms of learning ahead of time what the medical practitioners protocol is, what the risks are based on research, and talking through how to gently ask "Is there another option?" and "What about 'x'?" - this would have been so hard to do in the moment without any preparation or background knowledge. 
    virginiaunicorn11
  • I am not finding out sex this time. I am also going to buy a wrap to baby wear. I did not use a carrier at all last time around and definitely think it would be helpful. 
    virginiaunicorn11
  • Pregnancy: Well, this time I'm doing my best to keep moving so as to not gain 50+ pounds.

    delivery: this time we have a scheduled csection, in going in knowing I'm not trying for a VBAC (not a candidate), so that's gonna be less stress (hopefully). Also, we know exactly when the babe will be here so we will know where our other 2 will be. And I'm putting my foot down, no visitors besides my kids (and their babysitters because duh). 

    Baby: I will cosleep again, much easier for nursing. I will continue to have consistent routines from the beginning, and I will do my best to get baby into the habit of napping in a crib/pack and play/whatever but NOT ON ME! (My daughter wouldn't nap unless on me until she was almost 1 - it was wonderful/awful!). Since this will be our last I will do my best to live in the moment. 
    married 7.18.12   DS1 4.29.13   EDD 11.23.14

    image
    image

    my happy boy

    lph4248virginiaunicorn11caribbeanmama-2mrscate88
  • This time I will be hiring a doula and taking birthing classes.   Last pregnancy I did not take a birthing class (or have a doula).  I ended up with a second degree tear from one hole to the other, because I listened to the nurse who basically told me to blindly push as hard as I could, for as long as I could.    It was a full 6 weeks of extremely painful recovery.    
    I will do whatever I can to hopefully avoid that bad of a tear again.   

    lph4248mrscate88
  • I'm loving this thread. I know everyone is different and I won't be able to plan for everything, but it's edifying to get all these perspectives on what could make a positive difference.
    ~DD arrived July 4, 2017~
    virginiaunicorn11mrscate88satsumasandlemons
  • If I'm there to be induced I'm there to be induced and will be on a drip, if I want an epidural again I will get one and not feel guilty about needing pain meds. If I need a section then I need a section and so be it. My daughter was in a shitty position and I only got her out because you can drive a Mack truck through my pelvis- I did everything to turn her and she wouldn't budge. I know I will tear regardless because that's just usually what happens, even though DD crowned and stretched for 20 minutes. 

    I know there are most things I cannot control or change about labor but I will not feel guilty about getting an epidural. My coworkers are already telling me I WILL NOT get an epidural this time around and I just side eye them. 

    Breastfeeding wise, I will NOT exclusively pump for 9 months. If this baby's mouth is jacked up then it's jacked up and it will get a mixture of formula and breastmilk. I'm not doing that again. 
    TTC: 1/2014 BFP: 9/24 EDD: 6/8/2015 Sorry for the poor man's siggy...ticker won't load regardless of how many tips I read.
    virginiaunicorn11mrscate88alcrimmins
  • If I'm there to be induced I'm there to be induced and will be on a drip, if I want an epidural again I will get one and not feel guilty about needing pain meds. If I need a section then I need a section and so be it. My daughter was in a shitty position and I only got her out because you can drive a Mack truck through my pelvis- I did everything to turn her and she wouldn't budge. I know I will tear regardless because that's just usually what happens, even though DD crowned and stretched for 20 minutes. 

    I know there are most things I cannot control or change about labor but I will not feel guilty about getting an epidural. My coworkers are already telling me I WILL NOT get an epidural this time around and I just side eye them. 

    Breastfeeding wise, I will NOT exclusively pump for 9 months. If this baby's mouth is jacked up then it's jacked up and it will get a mixture of formula and breastmilk. I'm not doing that again. 
    Why in the world are your coworkers commenting on how you will get your baby out of your uterus?  I think you are entitled to do more than side eye them.  They need to shut up!


    alcrimmins
  • @caribbeanmama because our job is to figure out how to get babies out of said uteruses :smile: it's totally normal and understood since they know I had a crappy experience with my last epidural but still that's not what I want to do. If I come in and it's too late for one than so be it but more than likely I'll get one. A crappy epidural is better than no epidural. 
    TTC: 1/2014 BFP: 9/24 EDD: 6/8/2015 Sorry for the poor man's siggy...ticker won't load regardless of how many tips I read.
    alcrimmins
  • @caribbeanmama because our job is to figure out how to get babies out of said uteruses :smile: it's totally normal and understood since they know I had a crappy experience with my last epidural but still that's not what I want to do. If I come in and it's too late for one than so be it but more than likely I'll get one. A crappy epidural is better than no epidural. 
    Wait - are you a certified nurse midwife or a l&d nurse?  If the former then my mouth is open and I understand lol!

    Sorry you had a bad experience with the epidural, I had always heard women regret getting one if it didn't take or didn't take properly.  (Of course, when it works I've heard mostly positive things!). How is a crappy epidural better than no epidural?
  • @caribbeanmama thanks for the push. I'm been considering meeting some. They had a speed dating with doulas so you meet 5 in an hour and then you can meet more if you like one. I totally forgot about our hsa, dh deals with insurance, that's a good idea. 
    caribbeanmama-2
  • I won't have a morphine drip after this c-section. 

    I will babywear a lot sooner this time.

     I won't cry for weeks if I still don't get a drop of breastmilk.  My girls were formula fed and are both very healthy!


    Me (K)-27 DH (T)-30
    2 Rainbow DDs L-10/26/10 and A-03/27/14
    2 Angels- 10/26/09 and 02/03/15
    Surprise BFP on 10/25/16!!! Baby Firecracker is due on 07/02/17! 
    alcrimmins
  • @caribbeanmama because our job is to figure out how to get babies out of said uteruses :smile: it's totally normal and understood since they know I had a crappy experience with my last epidural but still that's not what I want to do. If I come in and it's too late for one than so be it but more than likely I'll get one. A crappy epidural is better than no epidural. 
    Wait - are you a certified nurse midwife or a l&d nurse?  If the former then my mouth is open and I understand lol!

    Sorry you had a bad experience with the epidural, I had always heard women regret getting one if it didn't take or didn't take properly.  (Of course, when it works I've heard mostly positive things!). How is a crappy epidural better than no epidural?
    My epidural wore off about 2 hours before pushing/delivery, but I am still glad that I got one. I did it 16 hours in. It let me sleep for 2 hours before they broke my water and things got real, fast. Without that nap, I'm not sure if I could have pushed on my own. As it was, the doctor was getting concerned about my energy level. 


    Last: my birth plan was just to have a baby. I will use that plan again this time. For me personally, it is empowering and liberating to let go of expectation and control, and just trust my birth team. (Normally I am Type A!)
    Xathdancegurl1118alcrimmins
  • -I won't use bumpers in the crib this time because now I know better....
    -I plan on getting that halo bassinet bedside sleeper thingie to help with nighttime BFing so I'm not constantly getting up all the time.
    -I will stress less about my usual milk supply issues and will do as much as I can without weighing myself down with all the extra guilt. If we need to use formula, then so be it. I exclusively BFed DS2 for 6 months and stressed through TWO nursing strikes that lasted a week each. ugh, I will pump and I will BF and do as much as I can, but I refuse to put all the unesseasry guilt of trying to never give any formula. I'm trying to be kind to myself :)
    -I'm taking the boppy with me to the hospital
    -I'm getting a scheduled C-section this time since I'm not a good candidate for a VBAC (2 previous C-sections) and part of me is so relieved because I can easily plan childcare for my two other kids, and I'm getting my tubes tied.
    -I'm trying to be very relaxed and chill this pregnancy. I was a crazy pregnant lady last time when I was pregnant with my rainbow baby (DS2), I googled everything, stressed about everything, it was awful. I don't even google anything this time around because it's all doom and gloom. I'm trying to be chill and positive.
    cssme13Sassenach1743mslynn2012
  • @virginiaunicorn11 I still vividly remember your "THOSE ASSHOLES WHO SAY YOUR CERVIX OPENS LIKE A FLOWER ARE LIARS". 
    TTC: 1/2014 BFP: 9/24 EDD: 6/8/2015 Sorry for the poor man's siggy...ticker won't load regardless of how many tips I read.
    tripledaggerWed95976OperaSingerMommyvirginiaunicorn11alcrimmins
  • @caribbeanmama because our job is to figure out how to get babies out of said uteruses :smile: it's totally normal and understood since they know I had a crappy experience with my last epidural but still that's not what I want to do. If I come in and it's too late for one than so be it but more than likely I'll get one. A crappy epidural is better than no epidural. 
    Wait - are you a certified nurse midwife or a l&d nurse?  If the former then my mouth is open and I understand lol!

    Sorry you had a bad experience with the epidural, I had always heard women regret getting one if it didn't take or didn't take properly.  (Of course, when it works I've heard mostly positive things!). How is a crappy epidural better than no epidural?
    My epidural wore off about 2 hours before pushing/delivery, but I am still glad that I got one. I did it 16 hours in. It let me sleep for 2 hours before they broke my water and things got real, fast. Without that nap, I'm not sure if I could have pushed on my own. As it was, the doctor was getting concerned about my energy level. 


    Last: my birth plan was just to have a baby. I will use that plan again this time. For me personally, it is empowering and liberating to let go of expectation and control, and just trust my birth team. (Normally I am Type A!)
    Wow - 16 hours in!  I should say that although I wanted a natural unmedicated birth, there was room for an epidural.  I was acutely aware that the whole thing was pretty much out of my control.  I also wasn't going to be bullish about a natural birth if there was a complication requiring a c-section.  Simply put, I am scared of the drugs and scared of surgery.  I just wanted to try without intervention first- so the plan was that it had to be my idea.  I had a super fast freaky labor so I can't say that I wouldn't have whispered/yelled the secret word to my husband lol!  I delivered the baby a couple hours after getting to the hospital.  We didn't even have time to open my hospital bag!

    I am also Type A, so trusting my husband and doula was a big deal!
  •  The only thing I'm going to change is MORE ME TIME after baby number two!!! I still can count on one hand the number of showers I have had alone...and not with DH. LOL I'm going to ask for help when I need it.....my parents and in laws and sister clearly won't offer!! I just have to ask! 

    Still to this day my in laws and sister have never watched my son, or offered to...my mom has a few times in 15 months and only because I asked. It's just me. DH is always at work, I'm a SAHM. I want to find someone I trust to come over and help me once a week for just a few hours....and I refuse to feel guilty about it! 

    Back story: my parents watch my sisters kids several days a week and she's also a SAHM. My inlaws always have their daughters two kids. I seem to have been left out of the babysitting circle! 
    mrscate88Sassenach1743virginiaunicorn11alcrimmins
  • I plan to just go with the flow and not stress. I was so stressed when I was pregnant with my first. My job was very stressful and my H and I fought a lot. I have since changed to a less stressful job and am trying to remind myself that there's no need to stress. I tend to be a highly anxious person so I'm working on that.

    My birth experience with my first was wonderful. I had the birth I had dreamed of and prepared for - 6 hr labor, unmedicated, peaceful birth with a midwife. As a postpartum nurse, I realize that every birth is different and that this next one may not go as smoothly. I am preparing myself mentally for that possibility.

    Once baby is here, I will be better at establishing sleeping routine and boundaries. I coslept with my first and he was the absolute worst sleeper until I finally had a mental breakdown due to sleep deprivation. He was 9 months old and we had to hire a sleep consultant for support. I know a lot more now than I knew with him. I kind of went into parenting blindly. I read books but felt that none truly prepared me for a baby that nursed non stop and wouldn't sleep anywhere except while being held. I can't go through that again. :(
    caribbeanmama-2mrscate88
  • LoveLee85 said:
     The only thing I'm going to change is MORE ME TIME after baby number two!!! I still can count on one hand the number of showers I have had alone...and not with DH. LOL I'm going to ask for help when I need it.....my parents and in laws and sister clearly won't offer!! I just have to ask! 

    Still to this day my in laws and sister have never watched my son, or offered to...my mom has a few times in 15 months and only because I asked. It's just me. DH is always at work, I'm a SAHM. I want to find someone I trust to come over and help me once a week for just a few hours....and I refuse to feel guilty about it! 

    Back story: my parents watch my sisters kids several days a week and she's also a SAHM. My inlaws always have their daughters two kids. I seem to have been left out of the babysitting circle! 
    Good for you!! 
    virginiaunicorn11
  • @satsumasandlemons can I just plagiarize and put some of this on my fridge?
    satsumasandlemonsSassenach1743virginiaunicorn11
  • I think I'd like to try epidural/pain meds free this time. Last time I was like "if I want it or need it, I'll get it, but no worries either way" and I made it to 6 or 7 cm last time, and the MW was about to break my water and goes 'wait, do you want the epidural? because if so, now is the time, it's about to get really intense' which made me nervous and decided to get it. I don't regret getting it, because he did not like, shit got intense and at the end they gave me a 'little' pitocin to help her rotate just a little. Plus, I think they turn it down/off when it's time to push anyways. Anyways, now that I "know" what it's like, I think I'd like to go without. 

    I'm going to eat before going to hospital, because last time I was too excited and didn't. Labor was long, and I got very hungry and they wouldn't let me eat. I had to beg for jello... which later I puked onto my darling husband. So I'd like to eat when I have the chance to save that. 

    I tore a little, and got stitches, no big deal. But at 1 week pp we went to get family pictures. The photog told me to straddle a chair behind a chair my husband was sitting on... and... I ripped my stitches- which hurt like a 1000 bee stings, and took 8 weeks to heal. So- this time I will straddle NOTHING. 

    As far as parenting, I think we did an okay job, no regrets that I can recall, so no major changes. We are toying around with doing cloth diapers this time, but we both work full-time and aren't sure we want to commit to that kind of laundry. 
    ***** TTCAL/Forever Buddy to Cour10e******
    -m/c at 11w2d due to partial molar 2008 -m/c #2 2009
    Beautiful daughter born February 2011
    image
    **Ultimate TTCALer 2009**

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    alcrimmins
  • I'm also in the group that will do better with sleep routine this time around! DS was a horrible sleeper, and only started sleeping the whole night in his own bed 2 weeks ago at 2.5... not something I'm proud of, but I nursed him to sleep for 2 years out of exhaustion. I will not nurse this baby to sleep

    I will ask for help when I need it! I went into a really bad rheumatoid arthiris flare around 6 months pp and my doctor expects the same this time so I'm going to need to prepare to ask for help when I'm in pain. I also will go out and leave the baby with DH sooner! Even if it's just to go sit in a bookstore or grab lunch alone between when baby needs to nurse. Getting out alone for the first time felt amazing and I had wished I did it sooner without feeling guilty. I need me time even for an hour or so.

    I will make my own baby food again. It was so easy and cheap and I actually had fun with it. 
    mrscate88virginiaunicorn11alcrimmins
  • mrscate88 said:
    LoveLee85 said:
     The only thing I'm going to change is MORE ME TIME after baby number two!!! I still can count on one hand the number of showers I have had alone...and not with DH. LOL I'm going to ask for help when I need it.....my parents and in laws and sister clearly won't offer!! I just have to ask! 

    Still to this day my in laws and sister have never watched my son, or offered to...my mom has a few times in 15 months and only because I asked. It's just me. DH is always at work, I'm a SAHM. I want to find someone I trust to come over and help me once a week for just a few hours....and I refuse to feel guilty about it! 

    Back story: my parents watch my sisters kids several days a week and she's also a SAHM. My inlaws always have their daughters two kids. I seem to have been left out of the babysitting circle! 
    Good for you!! 
    Thank you....I felt like asking for help made me look like I couldn't even handle one baby! Lesson learned, and really stupid thing to think. This SAHM shit is hard. Everyone needs help and deserves good help! 
    virginiaunicorn11
  • @satsumasandlemons love love love the baby connect app!
    TTC: 1/2014 BFP: 9/24 EDD: 6/8/2015 Sorry for the poor man's siggy...ticker won't load regardless of how many tips I read.
    satsumasandlemons
  • @plumpous  @caribbeanmama Thank you...I've mentioned some of his health history in previous posts, but we are definitely in a better place now.  He had brain cancer in college, and has had 3 strokes and several episodes of seizures since.  He has no functioning pituitary, so he takes a bunch of medicines daily.  He also becomes hypothermic because radiation therapy damaged his hypothalamus, too.  Between the emergencies and the regular doctor's appointments, we have seen a LOT of doctors over the years.  Thankfully, DS is a pretty smart kid, so he has coped pretty well.  We had to buy one of those "Help, I've fallen and I can't get up!" buttons, and teach DS about it this past year.  I was too worried that something would happen when he was home with his dad.  I am truly hoping that our scares are over, and this next baby never needs to know that the ER was part of our "normal."

    One thing to add to this "things I'd do differently" is asking for help.  I used to get upset and offended when my in-laws would just help with something, without me asking for help.  I used to think that it was a judgement of my capabilities that they thought I needed help.  Nothing is actually further from the truth - they help to help and to give us a break.  They know we have been through a lot, and want to make something easier for us, since nobody has control over DH's health.  I have learned the hard way to be honest about the help I need, and let them know when something is stressing me out.  That openness and honesty has made our relationships 1000x better, and has taken my stress level down sooo much.
    caribbeanmama-2satsumasandlemonsvirginiaunicorn11LoveLee85
  • @caribbeanmama I'm totally adding this to my bullet journal (because of course I bullet journal too, lol) there are some fundamental truths that new moms learn to accept this new reality and some women pick it up way earlier and some struggle with it - I was one of those ladies who had to get my ass kicked by colic and motherhood to learn how to be a mom to my daughter but bottom line, I will get help and I will take care of myself. 

    @chiquita928 you are you are a strong woman and glad your in laws are so thoughtful. 
    virginiaunicorn11caribbeanmama-2
  • I had a c-section with both babies but with my first even though the actual procedure was tougher I bounced back in less than a week, it took 2-3 weeks with my second. One thing I had wish I had done with both was have a stockpile of dinners I had frozen and could just pop in the oven. After the first few days we didn't really want company and me and my husband were fighting over meals especially with our last baby (he worked long hours and was exhausted and I had a newborn and a 1 year old recovering from a c-section so I was exhausted). If you can't cook things ahead, get some convenience meals and/or easy to cook food or if you live in any populated area with delivery (which we donnot...) get some gift cards and try not to worry about cooking the first couple weeks. I know it's a little thing but it can cause some big issues depending on your situation.

    And keep a stash of treats in your night stand or next to your chair or wherever you do your midnight nursing - you will appreciate a little snack when you are stuck nursing and can't decide if you are more tired or hungry. 
  • Has anyone read The Language of Flowers by Vanessa Diffenbaugh? I read it when ds was maybe 2 or 3 months and I just cried. It put into a story exactly how I felt. It's not all about having a child but in the second half the main character has a child and the story of how she struggles the first few days. 

    @Dcwtada that's a great idea to stock up on gift cards! I'll have dinners made but sometimes I want to order in but with everyone on maternity/paternity leave I feel like I have to be frugal. Dh gets paid paternity leave but it's less bc of how he gets paid. 
    virginiaunicorn11
  • - I will bring a swaddle sleep sack to the hospital.  DS loved to be swaddled and neither DH or I ever mastered the swaddle.  After 283744 YouTube videos and an epic hospital room fight that ended with DH yelling "I'm not an effing origami master" the lesson has been learned
    - I will also take a few cheap, huge, flowy nightshirts to the hospital.  The stupid hospital gown was so uncomfortable but I couldn't put pants on (mild hemorrhage after delivery so nurses were checking my bleeding constantly).

    -Will try to put baby in the crib for naps early on to try and save myself the grief of the crib nap transition.  We just let him nap in our arms, mamaroo or wherever but this time I want to do it differently.

    -make sure my house is fully stocked with easy to prepare one handed foods.  I went days where I'm not sure I ate anything until dinner which is terrible especially while BF.  DH works from home but he's very busy during the day.  He didn't get to take any time off when we brought DS home because ironically his business partner's wife delivered the exact same day I did.  Since she had a section and they had an older son she needed her husband off more than I needed mine so back to work H went.  
    cssme13
  • @abmommy15 LOL to the origami quote, bahahaha.  It took us like a whole month to really up our swaddle game.  We finally watched The Happiest Baby on the Block and it saved our lives!
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

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  • I think this time, I may line up some marriage counseling sessions pre-emptively. Last time it took us a few months to get ourselves there, and I wish we hadn't waited. I had weird beliefs about what needing counseling meant for our marriage. People on the Bump always encouraged it, but until we got to a really dark place, I didn't feel like we were "the kind of people who needed counseling." In hindsight, that was so silly. And even after our marriage got back on track, we enjoyed our counseling sessions as a way to deepen our bond. 
    alcrimmins
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