Monday Bitchfest 12/26

SaphireSweetie88

It's Monday and after the holidays. Anyone have something / someone to bitch about? Post it here.

Itsnotyourturn

My husband is incapable of cooking pork chops all the way through.  I have weirdness about under cooked pork. 5+ years together and he always acts offended when I have to throw the under cooked chop back on the grill.

Grrrrr.

SaphireSweetie88

I have so many from the holidays but one of them is my aunt. Her profession is a nutritionist. She spent a good 30 minutes asking about everything I eat / drink etc. I was currently drinking a fruit punch Caprisun (kind of like kool-aid) and she kade me feel like a POS mama for drinking it. I was like sorry, would you prefer I drink the rum infused drinks instead??

SaphireSweetie88

Itsnotyourturn said:

My husband is incapable of cooking pork chops all the way through.  I have weirdness about under cooked pork. 5+ years together and he always acts offended when I have to throw the under cooked chop back on the grill.

Grrrrr.

@Itsnotyourturn - I am the same way! My husband feels so bad (then I feel bad because he does) since he always under cooks or burns them.

Itsnotyourturn

SaphireSweetie88 said:

I have so many from the holidays but one of them is my aunt. Her profession is a nutritionist. She spent a good 30 minutes asking about everything I eat / drink etc. I was currently drinking a fruit punch Caprisun (kind of like kool-aid) and she kade me feel like a POS mama for drinking it. I was like sorry, would you prefer I drink the rum infused drinks instead??

My grandmother (who was a terrible mom as far as protecting her kids from stuff) tries this crap on me.  

I just stay away from her as much as possible.  She's just not a very nice person.  I won't invite her to ultrasounds or birth.  If she said something inappropriate (she would), I would slap her down like the hand of God.  

SaphireSweetie88

@Itsnotyourturn - I unfortunately couldn't get away from her during this. I was thankfully freed by another aunt who needed her for something. I know she means well but ugh

mrscate88

SaphireSweetie88 said:

I have so many from the holidays but one of them is my aunt. Her profession is a nutritionist. She spent a good 30 minutes asking about everything I eat / drink etc. I was currently drinking a fruit punch Caprisun (kind of like kool-aid) and she kade me feel like a POS mama for drinking it. I was like sorry, would you prefer I drink the rum infused drinks instead??

Oh your aunt would hate me haha. I drink a coke every day. It's my one bad habit, and I'm not giving it up. I hate when people try to impose their health positions on me...even though I'm a pretty healthy and active woman, I keep those opinions to myself unless you actually ask for advice. 

Itsnotyourturn

Also, I just want to go sit in a hot tub.   I get why it's not safe but I just want to anyway.  Ugggh.

@SaphireSweetie88, I'm sorry you were trapped , your just like a billion times kinder and more patient than I.

mrscate88

Itsnotyourturn said:

Also, I just want to go sit in a hot tub.   I get why it's not safe but I just want to anyway.  Ugggh.

@SaphireSweetie88, I'm sorry you were trapped , your just like a billion times kinder and more patient than I.

Me too! There's a local spa here with 19 heated pools, natural hot springs, steam rooms etc. It's calling my name. I'm so bummed I can't relax in an insanely hot tub for another year. Boooo

mj8215

@saphiresweetie88 that sounds like a super annoying conversation! Your aunt is lucky you're so nice lol!

 Aw man, now I want to sit in the hot tub too! Preferably with a glass of wine.
I've been making mental lists of the specific kinds of wine I'd like to drink when the time comes... 

Otherwise not too much to bitch about on my end. Quiet long weekend with lots of napping for me. Not excited about going back to work tomorrow though...

manillabar

@SaphireSweetie88 ugh I had a similar situation with my MIL. Yesterday after dinner, H's grandma passed around fudge that she brought and I had a tiny piece (like 1/2 an inch or less). Then maybe 20mins later she offers me another piece and I said "Oh I don't know," and she says jokingly "have a piece for the baby" so I joked back "that's how I get in trouble!" And MIL says to grandma "no, mom she needs to watch her weight!" And the  says to me "you're a doctor, you should know better!!" I was so embarrassed I couldn't come up with a good reply so I just said "it's just a tiny piece" and ate it anyway.  Then today out of nowhere while I'm getting a cup of water she asks me if I'm watching my salt intake -_-  I know she means well but my own mom doesn't even nag me so much!

Itsnotyourturn

@manillabar I just got pissed for you, that is some BS. I can't even with my MIL though. Luckily she lives on the other side of the country but I won't even talk to her on the phone. I do text though. She text me the other day to ask if I had given the name Angelica any thought. My first reaction was, no, why would I? I just thought it was super ballsy to make a name suggestion when her and I really have no relationship. People are odd.

Rotu101

manillabar said:

@SaphireSweetie88 ugh I had a similar situation with my MIL. Yesterday after dinner, H's grandma passed around fudge that she brought and I had a tiny piece (like 1/2 an inch or less). Then maybe 20mins later she offers me another piece and I said "Oh I don't know," and she says jokingly "have a piece for the baby" so I joked back "that's how I get in trouble!" And MIL says to grandma "no, mom she needs to watch her weight!" And the  says to me "you're a doctor, you should know better!!" I was so embarrassed I couldn't come up with a good reply so I just said "it's just a tiny piece" and ate it anyway.  Then today out of nowhere while I'm getting a cup of water she asks me if I'm watching my salt intake -_-  I know she means well but my own mom doesn't even nag me so much!

umm...what she said would have really pissed me off...I think I would have said something offensive back out of rage. 

Sassenach1743

Oh where do I start? People in general annoy me as it is but family and holidays completely exacerbate this...

First, my Mom made me nuts on Christmas eve because she kept arguing with me (lightly) over a new recipe I found for fish/seafood soup. I wanted to make this in lieu of several fish dishes (there were only four of us this year) because I didn't feel like cooking all the usual fish and seafood that is traditional for Christmas in my family. Anyway, she insisted on altering the amounts of the ingredients, mainly adding more tomato paste than called for, 2 teaspoons, so she added an entire 6 oz. can + 12 oz. of water! She ruined it. It didn't have the right flavor and instead of a light broth it was more like stew. It still tasted okay, but way too tomato-ey! I was mad because I had my heart set on a delicious fish broth with a touch of heat/spice, but it didn't turn out that way. *That's what I get for bringing a recipe into an Italian kitchen! My Mom didn't care she just started throwing stuff in the pot and before I knew it, it was too late.

Then my FIL, who really is a sweet and generous man, but tends to say a lot of ridiculous and sometimes offensive things... He's sitting on our couch with one of our cats (we have 2) in his lap and he says "So, what are you going to do about the cats?", to which DH and I respond "What do you mean?" and he proceeds to tell us that cats shouldn't be around babies because they could jump in the crib and suffocate them! Um, yeah that probably could happen but we are pretty diligent and confident that we'll be able to keep an eye on them and the baby, to make sure this doesn't happen. But to my, irrational, pregnant ears it sounded like he was insinuating that we needed to get rid of our cats... to which my response would be, FUCK NO!

meggaroo

Mine is with my husband. He is not feeling well, but isn't really sick, but he is acting like it and getting him to do anything is like pulling teeth. We have a 9 month old who is all over the place so trying to get anything done is next to impossible but husband doesn't seem to get that. I know he wouldn't let me sit around if rolls were reversed so it bothers me a lot that he thinks he gets a pass.

shanana_3

My MIL commented under her breath that she can tell I'm losing weight and it's not good for the baby, I'm not eating enough, I'm doing it on purpose just like last time (This is my second HG pregnancy) but what really pisses me off is she says it in Spanish which I understand enough to know she's talking about me.  Then makes my SIL a messenger after she leaves to tell me my husband is getting too fat and I need to talk to him.   I didn't realize I married into the weight police. 

OperaSingerMommy

Sorry to everyone who is getting food lectures from relatives.  That's truly obnoxious and I'd probably say something super rude that I'd regret- good for you all for keeping your cool.

I have been at my in-laws for a week and I'm finally getting the hell out of here tomorrow morning.  No one in this family communicates!  They never say what time we are going to eat a meal or ask everyone if they want to watch a certain movie or decorate cookies, etc.  Things just kind of randomly happen and then people get passive aggressive when you don't do exactly what they want.

Also, no one in this family is respectful if someone else is sleeping.  I put DD down for naps and they are talking full volume right outside her door and going in the room where she is to get things while slamming doors, etc.  Don't eff with our nap schedule, ya jerks.

ashaw512

SaphireSweetie88 said:

I have so many from the holidays but one of them is my aunt. Her profession is a nutritionist. She spent a good 30 minutes asking about everything I eat / drink etc. I was currently drinking a fruit punch Caprisun (kind of like kool-aid) and she kade me feel like a POS mama for drinking it. I was like sorry, would you prefer I drink the rum infused drinks instead??

I would have slurped the entire pouch really loud, and then drank another one.

Xath

@Sassenach1743 That actually did happen when my sister was born, but my cat was a feral rescue and never acclimated to people.  There are tons of resources on how to adjust your cats to a new baby.  I'm sure they'll be fine.

alcrimmins

OperaSingerMommy said:

Also, no one in this family is respectful if someone else is sleeping.  I put DD down for naps and they are talking full volume right outside her door and going in the room where she is to get things while slamming doors, etc.  Don't eff with our nap schedule, ya jerks.

I could have written this word for word! I'm used to it by now but it still annoys the crap out of me. It's like they forgot what it was like to have small children and think naps are optional. Then they get mad when dd wants nothing to do with them and call her crabby. I did smart off to my mil's newest husband when dd wanted nothing to do with him and he acted offended. 

tuxielove93

The holidays didn't even go that bad this year, but my husbands great aunt (oh yes, great aunt) started out the day by asking me if I was considering going back to school to finish my degree, and then continued to suggest different careers that I could have. In truth, I want to be a SAHM, but we're possibly not financially ready for that, and I just haven't said anything yet. Mostly because every time anything about me working comes up, it's "but you're so smart, and you have half a degree, and...." and I want to stay home with my kids, there isn't a career that really appeals to me, and school is too damn expensive. That's why I left in the first place. It's like that information just doesn't sink in. Then she got going asking me if there was going to be a waiting room for her to be in at the hospital. 1) I don't care if there is one, I don't even want my own mother at the birth. I don't do people, and this is probably going to be the most trying time of my life, and I need my peace and my husband, not to deal with a bunch of people. 2) You're a GREAT AUNT. You don't have hospital privileges. I'm not inviting a bunch of people. 3) I'm probably not even going to a hospital. I'm probably going to a birthing center that is 2 hours away. So really woman? She's normally really nice, but it pissed me off, and I guess I'm going to have to set some harder boundaries around who exactly can see the baby and when. I know it's kind of mean, but I need my sanity, and time to adjust to being a new mom, and I will not tolerate a bunch of people holding the baby while he cries away because he's terrified and just wants me. Nobody needs to see me that angry when they won't give the baby back. 

oheliza44

@SaphireSweetie88 and @manillabar I am so annoyed for you guys! I would freak if any family members made comments about what/how much I ate. So annoying!

I'm in DH's hometown for the week. He wants to meet up with friends from high school today and I am dreading it. I like his friends but their wives are AWFUL. They are sooo rough around the edges and we have nothing in common. To top that off, one of them made a huge scene at our wedding and I still haven't forgiven her for it. Normally I'd just drink my way through this interaction but that is not an option this year.

manillabar

@Itsnotyourturn and @Rotu101 I really did want to say something back but it's like my brain stopped working out of sheer shock that she would actually say that to me, especially in front of everyone! My husband didn't hear it, but he was also pretty pissed when I told him about it later.
I've got to come up with good comebacks in case there is a next time. I may have started this pregnancy overweight but I'm not going to spend the rest of this pregnancy feeling bad for what I eat. So far both I and the baby are healthy and my doctor has had no comments or complaints about my weight.

@kerils I think it's insane that your husband's GREAT-AUNT thinks she needs to be there where you give birth... like that is in no way a high priority relationship for that kind of moment, especially if you're not even going to have your own mother there. 

ljd2010

@manillabar That's the kind of shit that makes me go blind with rage. Kudos to you for not losing it. 

PurplePoppy424

I'm so sick and I'm super pissed that there's very little I can take to clear this up. I just want it to go away!

ginger1228

@PurplePoppy424 - I hear ya! DH and I were both sick last week and he got to take the good stuff while I'm stuck with Tylenol cold. Needless to say, I still have some congestion bc Tylenol does NOTHING. 

PurplePoppy424

@ginger1228 Yes!! My DH and DD both have this too. I'm so irritated. DH isn't near as sick as I am because he's getting the good stuff. I just need some sudafed. 

VMonte

Holidays are so annoying for us. We have three familys that wanted us to come down especially since we have a DS and this was his first christmas. We normally do our best to accommodate everyone else, this year, we took care of ourselves and got an earful. 

My family wanted us to come down for Xmas and asked us to do that 3 WEEKS before, when the agreement was for them to come to us (we live about a 4 hour drive away) but since their plans changed they thought we could drop everything go down there. Which is just impossible because we also promised Christmas day to my MIL (who hosts a bit of family so wouldn't have been able to drop everything to go down to florida). So I got an earful about how I was denying a grandparents first christmas with their grandson *eye roll*. P.S. they did manage to come up a week before christmas so we did a pre-christmas with them... and I still got the guilt trip. 

My MIL - my bitching about her is really because lately I've been on Team Petty and when you say you're going to host a family event, its really weird to have your friends drop by and watch us (the family) as we open our presents. You could have let us know that was happening so we would have bought them some wine or chocolate or something. Just super awkward. 

My FIL's wife - they got thanksgiving day this year, so they knew that christmas day wasn't fair for them to have too, but we were willing to do christmas eve at their home(they live about 2 hours away). Well that just wasn't possible for them - which is fine, we are all adults and have lives and schedules. But they tell us they are doing christmas day dinner at 5pm... which would not work for us, hauling a 10 month old on a mini road trip who goes to bed at 8, already overstimulated from the morning... sounded like catastrophe to me so we declined. But that didn't stop the FIL's wife from bitching about how we should have been there, and she told my SIL that I must be exaggerating my morning sickness because she never had any. Because, that had anything to do with it? I. hate. her. 

ginger1228

@VMonte - don't you know every pregnancy is the same?!
Family has such a great way of ruining the holidays!

LoveLee85

We told my in laws on Christmas Day we were having another baby.....my MIL only said 'oh'. It took everything I had not to flip out. She's not worth it!!!!!!! 

cssme13

My bitch is my BIL. He's a freaking bum and it drives me up a wall. He got a girl knocked up and now she refuses to live anywhere but with her family 3 1/2 hours away, which is no big deal I get it. But BIL refuses to move out there. Instead he chooses to live in my in laws and literally lay on their couch all day everyday doing nothing! He refuses to get a job so my in laws end up paying for everything for him truck, insurance, food, etc. He's the baby and it definitely shows. 

This is morning he rolls his butt out of bed at 10 and then makes the comment "geeze DH is still sleeping? What a bum." uh wtf? My DH is working graveyard shift, 10pm-6am he literally has only been asleep for 3 hours so yeah he's still sleeping you freaking bum he worked all night. 

I love my in laws and we are so lucky that they are letting us stay with them while we find a house but I am so annoyed that it also requires me to clean up after and cook for my lazy BIL. 

oheliza44

@cssme13 you are a better woman than me. I would have smacked him. 

cssme13

@oheliza44 for my MIL sake I try to keep the peace. I have a SIL who is always fighting with everyone and it takes a toll on MIL so to make her life easy I just bite my tongue.

PAengineer06

We didn't spend Christmas with either set of parents this year, so we decided to call them after dinner to let them know we are expecting. My in-laws finished dinner first so we told them first. Then before I could talk to my parents, my FIL posted about it on Facebook and even tagged me!!! Thankfully I'm not Facebook friends with any of my current co-workers or my boss!

Sassenach1743

PAengineer06 said:

We didn't spend Christmas with either set of parents this year, so we decided to call them after dinner to let them know we are expecting. My in-laws finished dinner first so we told them first. Then before I could talk to my parents, my FIL posted about it on Facebook and even tagged me!!! Thankfully I'm not Facebook friends with any of my current co-workers or my boss!

This makes me so thankful that neither of my inlaws are on Facebook! I would lose my shit if they did this! 

VMonte

@PAengineer06 Agh! Its great that they are excited but I hate for you that he made the announcement public without your go ahead!

LoveLee85

VMonte said:

@PAengineer06 Agh! Its great that they are excited but I hate for you that he made the announcement public without your go ahead!

Seriously who do people think this is OKAY TO DO?!?!?! Ugh. 

irishrose54

@LoveLee85 with my last pregnancy my mil had the same "oh" response and I'm still annoyed. This time my DH will be telling her himself...

OperaSingerMommy

PAengineer06 said:

We didn't spend Christmas with either set of parents this year, so we decided to call them after dinner to let them know we are expecting. My in-laws finished dinner first so we told them first. Then before I could talk to my parents, my FIL posted about it on Facebook and even tagged me!!! Thankfully I'm not Facebook friends with any of my current co-workers or my boss!

WHAT IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE?!  I would be livid!

LoveLee85

irishrose54 said:

@LoveLee85 with my last pregnancy my mil had the same "oh" response and I'm still annoyed. This time my DH will be telling her himself...

Our plan was to send them a picture via text message on NYE....but DH had a change of plans! I was annoyed but they are his parents. He sent me a text and was like CAN I TELL THEM? I said DO WHATEVER. We knew they would be this way because they did this with DS1 pregnancy. Now I'm mad at DH because I said I didn't want to be around for their shitty response and yep, I was and yep, it was still shitty!!! Grrrrr. 

supermom83

PAengineer06 said:

We didn't spend Christmas with either set of parents this year, so we decided to call them after dinner to let them know we are expecting. My in-laws finished dinner first so we told them first. Then before I could talk to my parents, my FIL posted about it on Facebook and even tagged me!!! Thankfully I'm not Facebook friends with any of my current co-workers or my boss!

I would be so mad if that happened to me! I don't plan on announcing on FB till 35 weeks. Yes I know I'm a tad extreme, but personally, I'm just not an announcing kind of person and only post pictures after the fact (be it a new baby or any other significant happy life event). 

How are you feeling about them annoucing like that? Did you mention something to them or are you just letting it go?