Small, supportive, Facebook group :-)

anna13013

Hi girls! My husband and I recently found out that we are expecting our 2nd little munchkin in June! We are so excited and perhaps equally as nervous with the anticipation of juggling our now 13 month old and a new baby! 

  

When I was pregnant with my daughter, I joined a very small group of amazing mommies on Facebook all due in September. The idea was to create an unbiased and judgment free zone for all of us to support each other throughout pregnancy and beyond! Our group "limit" was 100 members. This allowed us to get to know each and every mama as an individual. It's something that I was so thankful to have while I was pregnant and now as we all raise toddlers! Some of us are stay at home moms, some of us work 60 hours per week. Some of us breastfed our babies, some of us formula fed. Some of us supported the cry it out method, some of us ran to our babies at the very faintest whimper. We're all so different yet support each other in all choices that we each make as parents.... As long as no child is put in imminent danger, of course! 

I am hoping to find a similar group of mamas who would like kind and gentle support from other mamas who are having a similar experience! Please let me know if you are interested, and I will send requests to the first 100 ladies who are ready to take this journey on with me :-) 

Hope to see some of you soon! 

Anna 

 

n0soup4u

Hi There Anna. I am all for FB groups but not quite yet. With DD, ours didn't start up well into the second trimester. This gives enough time to sort out the lurkers and drive-bys. Also, FWIW, I don't personally think it's a great idea to set a number limit. If I was that 101 person and I got denied I would be hurt. Just an opinion. 

There was a thread created a few weeks ago regarding this topic and most ladies felt like right now is to soon. We are basically only on the second or third date Let's get to know each other a little more and I'd be happy to join. 

mirdamae03

Hey Anna, I'm all for a facebook group when it's been a little bit longer. However, you probably should post a little bit more around these parts before offering to start a facebook group. You currently have 2 posts to your name (one of which was a duplicate) and 0 replies. Everyone's got to start somewhere, but maybe give it a little time

Mashunya425

Agree with the ladies above. It is a bit too early for a facebook group- even for the ladies that have been posting consistently here for the past 6 weeks+. We need some time to weed out the "crazies"

Assiram42

mirdamae03 said:

Hey Anna, I'm all for a facebook group when it's been a little bit longer. However, you probably should post a little bit more around these parts before offering to start a facebook group. You currently have 2 posts to your name (one of which was a duplicate) and 0 replies. Everyone's got to start somewhere, but maybe give it a little time

Nothing screams I'm going to steal your money or babies, like offering to start a FB in your first post. 

MrsCaliRN

This looks very troll-ish. The first 100 members? OP, I really hope you aren't trying to pull a fast one 'cause that wouldn't be cool

loopstation104

anna13013

Oh wow. You have all read me very wrong. I am an elementary special education teacher. I am far from a troll and I am sorry to have rubbed anyone the wrong way. I am going to go about enjoying my pregnancy with those who would like to join me. Perhaps now is too soon for many of you and I absolutely respect your decision. I kindly ask that you do not continue posting on this thread in efforts to make me out to be anything other than what I am. 

I'm sorry that this was my first post. I didn't realize that it would be so offensive to some of you. 

thankfully

That sounds nice and all but I think we have the beginnings of a group like that here already (you might not know that, since it doesn't look like you've joined us or shared much of anything). But we're still getting to know each other, I'm not ready to hand out my first and last name, location, and other identifying info. 

anna13013

@itsfine Thank you for your reply! I can agree that it may be too soon. I just went based on my past experience which was really positive. I may have just been lucky! After the response that I got here, I'm actually a bit hesitant to start a group now. Sometimes I can be a bit naive... Thinking that everybody is good! I wish you a healthy and smooth pregnancy! :-)

anna13013

@Mashunya425 I can understand your point! Seeing as how this post was received, I think you may be right! 

anna13013

@mirdamae03 thank you for your reply!  I hesitate posting on forums because I fear getting negative comments. Of course it happened here with my very first post.  I have a tendency to be pretty sensitive!!! Sometimes I find that it's easier for people to be unkind in forums which is the reason that I suggested creating a separate page. 

Perhaps I do need to give it a little more time :-). 

loopstation104

It probably happened with your first post because you came here, never introduced yourself, never lurked long enough to see what people actually thought about a facebook group and just decided a facebook group needed to be started because being here wasn't special enough. I just find it slightly offensive that you wouldn't really want to get to know people here and just want to know people who followed you to your special group of 100. 
My last bmb started a facebook group late in third tri and it completely exploded. There is a very different dynamic when you real name is revealed. Call me negative all you want. If you wanted to actually get to know people here you probably would have tried to do that. 

kfry22

mrspeachy110307

Wow.  Are you for real?!?  I cannot believe that you would purposely hurt someone's feelings AFTER they apologized for upsetting everyone.  

mrspeachy110307

I understand everyone's hesitation to join a FB group.  But I cannot believe the comments and accusations you're all comfortable flinging without giving Anna a chance.  Yes, there are bad, awful people out there.  But how does SHE know you're not a troll.  She doesn't!!!!!!  But she is kind hearted enough to take a chance.  Joining a FB group (if you're FB profile is locked down like it should be) only gives your name and profile picture.  So what?!?  I could google that.  If you don't like the group you're free to leave.  Or you might meet 99 awesome momma's to go though this journey with!!  Have a little faith in humanity, ladies.  You might be pleasantly surprised.  I actually "know" Anna from a September 2015 birth group.  And I can tell you, if you choose to alienate her or other sweet, caring momma's you're the ones missing out.  

Mashunya425

@mrspeachy110307 There really wasn't anything that harsh in the thread... I am not sure why the strong reaction. 

Assiram42

mrspeachy110307 said:

Wow.  Are you for real?!?  I cannot believe that you would purposely hurt someone's feelings AFTER they apologized for upsetting everyone.  

Oh it's going to be a long 7 months if you can't take snark. This was literally her first post and maybe @kassyfry didn't read comments yet.

anna13013

@mrspeachy110307 I appreciate your comment. I'm embarrassed to admit how much the responses on this post bothered me today! The worst thing is being perceived as someone who you are not. Yes, perhaps asking women to join a Facebook group may be unfavorable to some but it may be favorable to others! Im going to leave this alone now but if anyone would like to join a group of women who choose to support each other, please feel free to directly inbox me ☺️ I wish you all a very uneventful and healthy pregnancy! 

mrspeachy110307

Someone said her post was trollish, someone said her post screamed I want to steal your money and baby, someone posted the meme "she doesn't even go here"...in my world those are harsh.  

Assiram42

mrspeachy110307 said:

Someone said her post was trollish, someone said her post screamed I want to steal your money and baby, someone posted the meme "she doesn't even go here"...in my world those are harsh.  

Guess you've both been fortunate enough not to have been in a group that involved trolls or someone stealing your money.  It's still too soon.  By all means make a FB group. No one is stopping you, but when your first post is to solicit members for a FB group, it's a red flag for those who've experienced the crazy.

mrspeachy110307

@Assiram42 Snark, as you put it, is one thing, if you know someone and know how it will be received.  Being nasty for the sake of being nasty is another.  I sure hope I'm raising my daughters to know the differences. 

prettyesq08

How about if you don't want to join a group, you just refrain from joining. I see no need to bash someone for offering. Accusing her of wanting to steal babies, saying she doesn't belong and the like. That's not snark. Thanks flat out mean girl behavior.  I'm not afraid to say that some of you should be ashamed of yourselves.

Assiram42

mrspeachy110307

***Removed for TOS Violation***

EmeraldNC

***Removed for TOS Violation***

Assiram42

***Removed for TOS Violation***

sarahannexvi

@anna13013 you do you, girl! I was in the Sept 2015 group, too. I don't remember reading about a Facebook group (I was very scatterbrained), but don't let some negativity pull you down. Sometimes TB can be overwhelming with over 400 people in the group posting new stuff all of the time. If it's more personal or less stressful for you to have that Facebook group then please do what makes you happy in your pregnancy! Not everyone has time to go on here and comment on every post or Like enough posts to gain credentials to be able to make a suggestion like some people claim is a requirement. Do what makes you comfortable. 

EmeraldNC

***Removed for TOS Violation***

thatlauragirl

I just wanted to add that I think there's a lot of value in this group and the way it's set up right now. It can be a source of entertainment, support and camaraderie not just for the regular posters but for countless others who may not participate a whole lot at first but love reading everything. I personally would hate to narrow my focus down to 99 other women only as I feel like I would rather organically find friendships here first. Not a bash, just another perspective.

BumpAdmin

This thread has been closed to new posts due to the change in topic. Continuing to create threads related to this topic will be grounds for warning and/or removal from The Bump Community.

Please note that we remove posts that do not follow our guidelines and will issue warnings to users who violate the Terms of Use.

To review our Community guidelines, please visit the Bump Guidelines pinned at the top of this board. Thank you.