@mamamiller I'm not sure if I should thank you for the validation or curse you for making this seem like a better idea!! I KNOW MH would be on board. So I haven't even discussed it with him because he will latch on.
I have another lame one. I judge people who use (very poor) "text speak" in texts and online (mostly fb). "THX" is my biggest peeve. "Thanks" is only 3 more letters! Also if you're trying to be a keyboard warrior and have a debate/argument with someone, you're not going to win if your post is full of Poor spelling and grammar. I judge. Hard.
@bacorrea, I completely agree! We were at Chick-fil-A and these kids were in the play area screaming so loudly they were disrupting the whole restaurant. Or the kids at the mall play area and think it is a ninja obstacle course when there are young children around. Big judgy glance from me!
@ShadeofGreen816 if it helps- the irritational pregnant women is not going to win this one. Amoung my principals, I know it will cause more anxiety for me and in my area they are not as affordable as many others. They run $175 for a five minute scan! I can't justify it!
@mamamiller that would do it for me too!! It's $80 here and it's a 10-15 min scan (which is probably unnecessarily long) which feels affordable. I'm hoping that my irrationality will be quelled when I go to the Dr on Tuesday and everything is OK and I generally feel less crazy.
i think it's ridiculous when someone posts a thread and the first comment is "you didn't post an intro" or "this should be addressed on the weekly randoms". Seems silly that if you have a question or rant that you should have to wait for a certain day or thread to have it addressed.
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@mia1116 I agree. I understand the desire for organization and not having a million threads about the same kind of thing, but some of the comments are pretty harsh. I personally don't read the intros, so I couldn't care less if someone posts an intro. Others may feel differently and that's fine.
i think it's ridiculous when someone posts a thread and the first comment is "you didn't post an intro" or "this should be addressed on the weekly randoms". Seems silly that if you have a question or rant that you should have to wait for a certain day or thread to have it addressed.
SIQB. Thats the beauty of this board, were not so strict about waiting until a certain day to post something. We already have the random thread going on for the whole week that those threads could have easily been posted into. When it comes to drive bys, yes I do acknowledge they're new and could get to know the board better first but I think I'm still pretty nice about how I handle it. Unfortunately most of these end up being trolls.
i think it's ridiculous when someone posts a thread and the first comment is "you didn't post an intro" or "this should be addressed on the weekly randoms". Seems silly that if you have a question or rant that you should have to wait for a certain day or thread to have it addressed.
That wasn't the first or even second comment. And this board isn't any different than any other bump board. None of them enjoy personal google drive-bys. I truly don't understands WKs that's have all day answer stupid questions for randoms or MUD.
eTA: It's ironic that the person who started a closed, exclusive Facebook group is complaining that we don't support randoms here.
I like most of the organization here, but the randoms/questions one is hard for me to follow. It gets too long, and I think some questions get missed. Maybe we need to do both a randoms and a questions thread. That might help make it so questions don't get missed.
May Siggy Challenge: Labor Memes
Me:31 DH:32 Married 11/06/10 DD: Born 8/23/13 (clomid+ovidrel+IUI) BFP 9/9/16 EDD 5/19/17
I like most of the organization here, but the randoms/questions one is hard for me to follow. It gets too long, and I think some questions get missed. Maybe we need to do both a randoms and a questions thread. That might help make it so questions don't get missed.
Im not against that idea if it will help more people follow along better and get their questions answered. I do love how involved that thread get now though
At one point, we had discussed a Symptoms Saturday thread, but it never happened. Maybe a separate symptoms thread would help clean up the randoms thread? I personally don't mind how the randoms thread is currently done, just a thought.
Some boards do a separate symptoms thread. I'm not against that. I'm also not against a separate thread for a specific question. It's the random drive by single questions that are annoying. I also like how involved the randoms & questions thread gets.
It's not the "no intro" posts that bother me (I suggested it to OP of the feel my ute thread, yes, but I'm Meh about them at this point). It's the people who've never participated in Any thread asking questions that google could have answered, then getting upset when they get truthful answers and not puppies, rainbows, and unicorn fart answers they wanted to hear; then we never see them post again. You wouldn't do that to a group of IRL strangers, so don't do it here.
Do you think it could possibly turn into a drive by because the first time they post a question, maybe not understanding the way the board runs, they are made to feel stupid so they don't come back.
What is wrong with @mia1116 posting her fffc? Just because she started a FB group doesn't mean she isn't entitled to participate here as well. All the other BMB's are ran this way? Really? I was in June 16 and it was not ran this way or dominated by a couple of people who feel the need to GIVE SNARK a whole new definition.
OK @mia1116 you should be in the clear now. I put the target right on my back. Snark away.
There is nothing wrong with mia posting her opinion. We are just as entitled to share our opinions as well. Its not the one sided opinion thread. FWIW, I already told her awhile ago that I would love it very much if she continued to stick around and participate in spite of starting the fb group, as well as other fb users. And I still feel that way. Everyone is welcome, drive by posts when you already have good ol' google just happened to be frowned upon by several of us while others feel the responses are uncalled for. It is what it is.
Do you think it could possibly turn into a drive by because the first time they post a question, maybe not understanding the way the board runs, they are made to feel stupid so they don't come back.
What is wrong with @mia1116 posting her fffc? Just because she started a FB group doesn't mean she isn't entitled to participate here as well. All the other BMB's are ran this way? Really? I was in June 16 and it was not ran this way or dominated by a couple of people who feel the need to GIVE SNARK a whole new definition.
OK @mia1116 you should be in the clear now. I put the target right on my back. Snark away.
I didn't say she can't post her opinion. I said her opinion was ironic. That was my opinion.
I don't participate in FFFC because I never have anything good to add, but I do love reading them!
Personally I think the level of snark over here is higher than my previous bmb/other groups I'm part of on TB. Sometimes it feels a bit harsh, other times it's quite entertaining. Though I do think people who are really bothered by it may find it helpful to seek the type of support they're looking for elsewhere. No implications for any one person meant in that statement at all, just to clarify. I just think everyone is entitled to the support they need, and if that's not here that's perfectly okay.
@SparkySunDevil Ditto. The snark was awful on my Sept 14 that I didn't get involved as much as I do now. The bump got a lot stricter by the end of 2014 as some of us may remember. If you think its bad now.. I could probably find some old threads that are downright awful.
Coming from TTGP (I was more of a lurker for a long time and then participated for a month or two), the snark here is tame. I prefer our level - some snark is good, but I tend to think it can get out of hand on TTGP at times. It's just a happy medium we need to settle into. We'll get there.
FFSC: I miss the old bump. Nov '14 was fun as hell and pulled very few punches. It's puppy and rainbow city over here and it gets a bit boring sometimes.
We still have some honest real real women on hefe though and you all are great, just outnumbered!
FFSC: I miss the old bump. Nov '14 was fun as hell and pulled very few punches. It's puppy and rainbow city over here and it gets a bit boring sometimes.
We still have some honest real real women on hefe though and you all are great, just outnumbered!
For real! I hate the rainbows and butterflies. My BMB (July 2014) was infamous for sniffing out a catfish. The drama was nuts....and insanely entertaining haha
This is ironic because I had the thought this morning to write a FFFC about how I get so annoyed when people aren't snarky to drive-by's/randoms. Like, anyone who responded with a non-sarcastic "cool story!" on that thread about dreaming up her baby's name got serious side-eye from me.
I think the issue is what happens when there isn't some level of snark. Go on one of those other boards and seriously every other thread is someone posting a question they could have googled without first becoming part of the community. I love The Bump because there is a level of etiquette that you don't see on other sites and that etiquette exists because people call each other out when they try to jump in and ask questions without any intro. And to agree with other posters, I don't think anyone expects that you do an intro in the intro thread per se, but for God's sake, when writing a post take a second to say "hi, I'm so-and-so, this is my second pregnancy and I'm really excited to be here and learn from you ladies. I have a question that I haven't seen answered other places and I'm wondering if you can help..." Even that is a huge improvement from what we've seen.
People have likened this to a support group in person and I think that's the best possible comparison. I have never been part of an IRL pregnancy group, but I was part of a few mom groups when DS was younger. And let me tell you, no one showed up on their first day and jumped right in with "my baby has colic what do I do?" People got to know each other, introduced themselves, offered support to each other, etc. all while getting answers to their own questions. But it was very much a give-and-take and the posts that are getting snark are usually total strangers jumping in and then (usually) offering nothing in return. That's not ok in real life, and I appreciate everyone who has called out that kind of behavior because if it keeps happening it takes away from the overall community. If you don't like the snark, don't do it, but recognize it doesn't just come from someone trying to be bitchy. It's an attempt to preserve and strengthen this community.
@RainyDays86, I think I love you. ^ perfectly said.
Ditto. I have to warn you, @RainyDays86, if you keep composing well thought out posts like this, I may develop a little crush on you. This goes for anybody else too!
See, we are pampers people, too, but I feel like honest company people are the real snobs. Also I love this board. I have ptsd from my last board because everything I did was wrong no matter how hard I tried. Which is weird because that was my second bmb and I'm still super active with my first group six years later. So I'm blaming the board (humor me).
I really hate tv shows where someone throws up one time and then they realize they are pregnant and then never throw up again. I want to see three months of constant morning sickness at a minimum.
Also fffc I'm still team Rafael even though Jane and Michael got married. (Jane the virgin, sorry, I'm watching a freakish amount of t.v. these days.)
@RainyDays86 that's seriously the best explanation I've ever heard for bmb snark. UO, probably, but I don't get why experienced bumpies wouldn't just clue a sister in or try to explain the issue before immediately jumping into snark mode. The unspoken bump rules are not obvious to everyone. E.g. I learned about trigger warnings the hard way!
@tenfour well, it's my first bmb but I've found that if you read it for ten minutes before posting you may find all the answers. Most of the questions inviting snark are really basic and can be googled in like five minutes. And some people don't seem to realize that replies on here can't be interpreted as actual medical advice (like the "there's spotting, what do I do?" threads).
@tenfour well, it's my first bmb but I've found that if you read it for ten minutes before posting you may find all the answers. Most of the questions inviting snark are really basic and can be googled in like five minutes. And some people don't seem to realize that replies on here can't be interpreted as actual medical advice (like the "there's spotting, what do I do?" threads).
That's fair. This board does a really good job explaining things up front.
@NotAPlaya-JustCrushAlot seriously, you need to let the Facebook group go. You asked on that thread if it was the last time I was going to post about it and I said yes and it was. Can we move on?
i understand some of your reasoning for why you want the board the way it is. I was just stating my confession. I think some people don't come back because they get a lot of snark and are intimidated to participate anymore.
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@NotAPlaya-JustCrushAlot seriously, you need to let the Facebook group go. You asked on that thread if it was the last time I was going to post about it and I said yes and it was. Can we move on?
i understand some of your reasoning for why you want the board the way it is. I was just stating my confession. I think some people don't come back because they get a lot of snark and are intimidated to participate anymore.
You mean the post you dirty deleted? I don't have to let anything go. And your confession was actually an opinion. Your entitled to yours; I'm entitled to mine.
If someone is intimidated by our tame community, this definitly isn't the place for them. We're all grown ass adults and there's no participation trophies here.
Re: FFFC!
i think it's ridiculous when someone posts a thread and the first comment is "you didn't post an intro" or "this should be addressed on the weekly randoms". Seems silly that if you have a question or rant that you should have to wait for a certain day or thread to have it addressed.
eTA: It's ironic that the person who started a closed, exclusive Facebook group is complaining that we don't support randoms here.
May17 Siggy Challenge
Labor
Me:31 DH:32 Married 11/06/10
DD: Born 8/23/13 (clomid+ovidrel+IUI)
BFP 9/9/16 EDD 5/19/17
May17 Siggy Challenge
Labor
What is wrong with @mia1116 posting her fffc? Just because she started a FB group doesn't mean she isn't entitled to participate here as well. All the other BMB's are ran this way? Really? I was in June 16 and it was not ran this way or dominated by a couple of people who feel the need to GIVE SNARK a whole new definition.
OK @mia1116 you should be in the clear now. I put the target right on my back. Snark away.
EDD: 06/25/2006 M/C: 11/03/2005
EDD: 04/08/2012 M/C: 09/03/2011
EDD: 12/27/2012 Born Sleeping: 07/19/2012
EDD: 12/07/2013 M/C 05/30/2013 & 05/31/2013
EDD: 07/01/2016 Born sleeping: 03/02/2016
May17 Siggy Challenge
Labor
*was not run
Personally I think the level of snark over here is higher than my previous bmb/other groups I'm part of on TB. Sometimes it feels a bit harsh, other times it's quite entertaining. Though I do think people who are really bothered by it may find it helpful to seek the type of support they're looking for elsewhere. No implications for any one person meant in that statement at all, just to clarify. I just think everyone is entitled to the support they need, and if that's not here that's perfectly okay.
Me: 26 DH: 28
TTC #1 since 06/2014
BFP #1 09/23/15. MMC discovered 11/24/2015
BFP #2 08/24/16 EDD 05/08/17
We still have some honest real real women on hefe though and you all are great, just outnumbered!
May '17 labor memes
I think the issue is what happens when there isn't some level of snark. Go on one of those other boards and seriously every other thread is someone posting a question they could have googled without first becoming part of the community. I love The Bump because there is a level of etiquette that you don't see on other sites and that etiquette exists because people call each other out when they try to jump in and ask questions without any intro. And to agree with other posters, I don't think anyone expects that you do an intro in the intro thread per se, but for God's sake, when writing a post take a second to say "hi, I'm so-and-so, this is my second pregnancy and I'm really excited to be here and learn from you ladies. I have a question that I haven't seen answered other places and I'm wondering if you can help..." Even that is a huge improvement from what we've seen.
People have likened this to a support group in person and I think that's the best possible comparison. I have never been part of an IRL pregnancy group, but I was part of a few mom groups when DS was younger. And let me tell you, no one showed up on their first day and jumped right in with "my baby has colic what do I do?" People got to know each other, introduced themselves, offered support to each other, etc. all while getting answers to their own questions. But it was very much a give-and-take and the posts that are getting snark are usually total strangers jumping in and then (usually) offering nothing in return. That's not ok in real life, and I appreciate everyone who has called out that kind of behavior because if it keeps happening it takes away from the overall community. If you don't like the snark, don't do it, but recognize it doesn't just come from someone trying to be bitchy. It's an attempt to preserve and strengthen this community.
May17 Siggy Challenge
Labor
I really hate tv shows where someone throws up one time and then they realize they are pregnant and then never throw up again. I want to see three months of constant morning sickness at a minimum.
Also fffc I'm still team Rafael even though Jane and Michael got married. (Jane the virgin, sorry, I'm watching a freakish amount of t.v. these days.)
i understand some of your reasoning for why you want the board the way it is. I was just stating my confession. I think some people don't come back because they get a lot of snark and are intimidated to participate anymore.
If someone is intimidated by our tame community, this definitly isn't the place for them. We're all grown ass adults and there's no participation trophies here.
May17 Siggy Challenge
Labor
May17 Siggy Challenge
Labor