Anyone else?? Maybe TMI

keaton732

Sooo I just had a D&C done on 10/26. Stopped bleeding last night. Today I was very fertile and my hormones was sky high. Has this happened to anyone else before and they had intercourse with their significant other and it was fine??? We had already been without sex for a month due to spotting and couldn't get off each other today because of high hormones. And it is helping us emotionally. I have read that some people have done it before and things were fine. I hope I'm not the only one experienced this. Opinions please?!!

rainbowturtles

After my last miscarriage we didn't go to the doctor so nobody told us to abstain. I didn't have a D&C, though. We did have sex the day after my loss and I was fine but I have heard there can be a risk of infection, especially since D&C is considered a surgery, so I'm not sure you'd want to risk it. If I knew now that we should have abstained, I wouldn't do it again even tho I was fine. But as far as it helping emotionally, that's exactly what I felt. That I needed the closeness to DH and it helped. Perhaps you could be intimate in other ways that don't include penetration just to be safe?? I'm very sorry for your loss and understand the wanting to be with each other as intimately as possible

keaton732

Thanks @rainbowturtles. We definitely needed that closeness with each other but I will definitely try to stay on the safe side from this day forth. I am feeling fine but don't want to cause any problems. My follow up appointment is November 23rd and it feel so far away omg. But we will try to hold out until then before letting it happen again. It's sort of tough right now but we will try to hold out. Thanks alot for your input ❤️

RiverSong15

After a MC in general, I was told to abstain from sex for two weeks to avoid risk of infection. I'm not sure if a D&C has extra restrictions since it's a surgery, but I'd recommend asking your doctor. I understand the need for closeness, though. Maybe there's other things you can do that aren't sex to get that closeness? Pretend you're young, hormonal teenagers that haven't had sex yet 

keaton732

Okay @RiverSong15 I guess that's what we will have to do then. This wait is going to get the best of us though lol

flipflopped

Same two week abstain instructions as @RiverSong15 for a natural miscarriage.

keaton732

Okay thanks @flipflopped

weareturtles

I was told wait a week after D&C.

SP128

My doctor just told me yesterday to wait two weeks after passing the sac.  She said my cervix was closed but since it was recently open she didn't want me to risk infection.  I was wondering how it would be a risk if my cervix is already closed.  For me, better safe than sorry because an infection is the last thing I need right now.

starfish827

My Dr. also said to wait 1 week after D&C. We waited a few more days cuz it hurt when we tried. By two weeks it was fine. 

keaton732

Ohhh okay okay @SP128. Thanks. This information is definitely useful. My cervix closed too but hey I am going to wait until my follow up appointment. @endo_mom I definitely don't want it to hurt so yeah we will wait. 

NewMommyCoop

Late to the game, but it seems doctors advice is different, I used Misoprostol and my doctor said it was safe once the bleeding stopped. Of course, it was three days shy of two weeks before it fully stopped. 

keaton732

Oh ok then. Thank you @NewMommyCoop mines has actually stopped already but spotting a little yesterday then stopped again. Thanks for your input. I appreciate it

NewMommyCoop

I was like that too @keaton732. I was random and maybe only once a day. I would think I was done and then have a little more. I waited until I did not have any for two full days.

keaton732

Oh okay lol had to make sure my body isn't the only one that did that. I be about to get all happy then see spotting again lol but thats what I am going to do as well wait until after two full days of none or maybe three then get excited lol that way I will know it has stopped. @NewMommyCoop

NYTino24

*Bumping the zombie to acknowledge I read this thread, but hoping for more recent responses*

When did you first have sex after your MC? ...or when do you think you will? Was it protected or not? Did it hurt? Did you bleed? I started crying the first time I saw sex on tv after my loss. Just the thought of it made me sad. I think my hormones were just all over then. Now I'm emotionally ready, but plan on waiting the two weeks or until I feel 100% normal down there. DH has sworn off sex in the first trimester for the next pregnancy (or more if necessary) since I started bleeding the day after we last DTD. 

jen83mn

@NYTino24

I actually have been thinking about the same thing tonight. I had an early miscarriage last week, just stopped bleeding yesterday, and HCG was down to 0 as of yesterday. The past two days I've actually been really in the mood, but I'm going to wait two weeks from when the bleeding stopped just to make sure everything is back to normal and there's no risk of infection. It will be protected (condoms) until we start trying again in June (benched for one cycle at doctor's advice, then waiting until June for other reasons).

I'm also curious as to whether it will hurt or if I will bleed, but I wouldn't be surprised if I bled as my cervix tends to get very sensitive during pregnancy. We will also be holding off on sex during first trimester when we get pregnant again. *TW: LC Mentioned* I spotted after sex every single time during my first pregnancy with my son. It was terrifying each and every time. Went on to have a healthy pregnancy, but after this experience, I know I couldn't handle that next time, so DH is just going to have to suck it up for awhile! We didn't have sex much anyways during my last pregnancy because in first tri I would spot, in second tri it started to really hurt because my cervix was so sensitive, and in third tri it was just awkward. *End TW*

splashmountain

@NYTino24 and @jen83mn we waited until I stopped bleeding which was almost 2 weeks after my natural mc. I had no pain (DH was very gentle just in case), no bleeding and we used a condom. 

NYTino24

Thanks for the responses @pumpkin0913 and @jen83mn. I already changed my mind. I think I will cry if we do it too soon and I am not ready. I stopped bleeding yesterday and only had light spotting for the last 2 days. I hate thinking / knowing that it will upset me since I love DH and I don't even know why the thought bothers me.

babypi

We pretty much jumped in the sack the same day I got cleared by my OB. That was 12 days after D&C. I did have a bit of spotting after, but my cervix tends to be sensitive anyway. 

MimoCa

We waited til I stopped bleeding the last time around and there was no pain or anything but everyone is different. This time though, I think we are more awkward. Still bleeding so haven't tried but I doubt we will get back on the horse so easily lol

Edited because I'm bad with words

Uhlease13

surprisingly I don't remember the details about how long we waited but I do remember shedding a tear the first time after sex after our first loss. Sex can already be an emotional thing and adding this on top of it,

vlagrl29

I had a CP and was notified of that I think a few days before New Years. We had sex on New Years unplanned it just felt right. I did cry right afterwards. Since then though it's been fine back to normal. I'd say ever since my bleeding has stopped I've felt much better emotionally.

SP128

My ob had me wait two weeks after I passed the sac. She explained that too soon may cause an infection since my cervix wasn't recently open. We needed tbat advice since an infection was the last thing I needed

dh was gentle and I felt like it was an emotional experience. It just felt odd knowing that there was no more baby. I think regardless of how long we waited, it would've still be awkward the first time. 

We did not not use protection 

edit - mobile bumping and auto correct do not mix : )

RiverSong15

My OB said the same thing as @SP128. We needed to avoid for 2 weeks to prevent infection (this is the same reason I was supposed to use pads and not tampons during a MC). The absolute last thing I wanted was to get an infection on top of everything else. We ended up waiting a month both times because I just wasn't emotionally ready. Phsycially, the first time felt completely normal. Emotionally, I felt more numb and couldn't enjoy it completely because of thinking about the MCs. The second time felt much more normal. Not gonna lie, though, I still have moments in FW where I'm sad that we're still TTC. I try not to let it affect sex, but the thoughts are there sometimes.

dragonfly87-2

@NYTino24:

I was much earlier along (about 4 weeks 4 days) and did not experience a lot of bleeding (only two days), so my experience may be different. 

However, I did not feel like having sex for about 10 days after the MC. And honestly, I didn't really feel like, but my FW was coming up and I knew I would O soon, so we decided to DTD. We weren't planning to wait any cycles...even though my doc recommended it.

Well, I thought I was emotionally ready to TTC again last month, regardless of the outcome (positive, negative, another CP). I was so wrong. I decided to take a hpt the night before AF was due. When it showed a stark white negative, I had an emotional meltdown. Then, when I had a very spotty, 2 day period (like I did during my CP), I broke down again because I knew my uterine lining still hadn't increased and was thin (thanks Mirena). 

Now, about 6 weeks post MC, I am feeling more "normal." We decided to try again this month and I think it will be better emotionally. But DTD still feels odd and I am distracted during it. I think it's mostly though because I am wondering if my body is ready to cooperate and get its hormones back in check.

Mack2342

I can't remember what mine said but I want to say 10 days to 14 days to avoid infection and no tampons for same period. I was nervous the first time but it was good for my emotions and it was about 2 weeks after 

NYTino24

Well my HPT is close to negative now, but my OPK is pretty dark still. Wondering what my HCG test results will be. Doing that tomorrow and should get the results by the middle of the week. FF is counting the actual day of MC as CD1, so technically I'm on CD8. In just one week, my boobs are totally gone (nipples are still a little bigger than usual though) and so is my stomach. I have lost 4 pounds, my BP is back to normal, and all traces of being pregnant are pretty much gone. I'm feeling some stuff on my right side (where the baby was) and if I hadn't been KU / had a MC, I might think it was eggs maturing and getting ready for O. I don't typically O until CD 15 at the earliest and 24 at the latest. Typically it's about CD19. I hope I have a normal AF with an ovulatory cycle.

SP128

@NYTino24  I hope you O too. I Oed on CD20 right after mc.  Since I didn't chart or do OPKs, I'm not sure if that was late or what.  Since then, my O has been give or take a few days.  
My advice to anyone thinking about TTC is to chart a few months before starting to get a baseline of what "normal" is.

justsuzie

@NYTino24 My OKS were dark for 1.5 weeks even after HPT were negative.

mylittleversailles

@NYTino24 I actually spotted all the way to my next period and the doctor said to wait until the bleeding had stopped, so I did. The first time did not physically hurt, but we both cried after. It was really difficult for a long time. It's still hard sometimes to be truthful. We have been having scheduled sex for 16 months, which is my idea of a nightmare, though since we hit a year, we worked hard on relaxing about it. It's kind of impossible not to track (even when I stopped tracking) because I know my body so well after all this time. It gets better, either way.