It is very hard to believe that almost a year has past since I first found out I was pregnant with my Hope. I was only 4 weeks when I took that first test and then basically took one a week for a while! It was an exciting and stressful time and I was so sick and tired!
As we are preparing to make some big (good) changes in our lives, I look back at all the things I had planned. I think about what I would be like if Hope made it and we were a family of 4 instead of 3. It is hard. I find myself still missing her.
I also find that everyone (even my therapist) feels like I should have moved on 100% by now! I mean are they kidding. What am I supposed to do, forget?
So instead we are adopting a dog and hopefully will be able to save up enough money to start the adoption process for a baby. But who knows. right now moving into our own Home will be a good first step to changing and getting my life back.
Quitting my job might be another step I am going to make. They do not understand what I have gone through and how my depression and pre-exisiting anxiety issues are effecting my day.
So How is everyone else holding up? Are you making any big changes to help you move on from your grief?