Time Flies — The Bump
Late Term and Child Loss

Time Flies

It is very hard to believe that almost a year has past since I first found out I was pregnant with my Hope. I was only 4 weeks when I took that first test and then basically took one a week for a while! It was an exciting and stressful time and I was so sick and tired! 
As we are preparing to make some big (good) changes in our lives, I look back at all the things I had planned. I think about what I would be like if Hope made it and we were a family of 4 instead of 3. It is hard. I find myself still missing her. 
I also find that everyone (even my therapist) feels like I should have moved on 100% by now! I mean are they kidding. What am I supposed to do, forget? 
So instead we are adopting a dog and hopefully will be able to save up enough money to start the adoption process for a baby. But who knows. right now moving into our own Home will be a good first step to changing and getting my life back. 
Quitting my job might be another step I am going to make. They do not understand what I have gone through and how my depression and pre-exisiting anxiety issues are effecting my day.

So How is everyone else holding up? Are you making any big changes to help you move on from your grief?

Re: Time Flies

  • I know what you mean. I can't believe that Hannah will be gone for 7 weeks tomorrow. Time just seems different now. It feels like we lost her yesterday but at the same time it feels like it has been years. We are looking to buy a new house. Hannah is our first child and we had her nursery all set up and ready for her. Every time I walk into the house I just think she should be here. So I think we will move.
  • Hugs to both of you!!

    @Deepoet don't let anyone make you feel like you are grieving incorrectly! You should not be "over it." I don't think this is something people just get over. It's something that becomes a part of you and you just learn to deal with it a bit more every day. I'm definitely not over my loss, and I never will be, because I will always think of her and who she might have been.

    I'm a different person now, and I'm trying to figure out who that is. I know it's been hard for DH to figure out who I am now as well. We will keep working on it.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
     Rainbow baby Savannah born 5.13.16 at 30 weeks    
     ♥ 
    Baby Cadence born still 3.24.15 at 28 weeks 

            
  • Hugs to all of you ladies! I agree this is something you never "get over" or "move on" from. My son is always a part of me though not as I planned. I always wish he was here like I imagined and I continually work on finding my new normal. There are different stages of grief and it's a process - whatever helps you is good and for each person it can be different. 
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