Twatwaffle Tuesday 10/4

joyful08

Who has a twatwaffle today?

BlondePeanut

My sore throat! It sucks today, ugh

Gretchypoo

A volunteer leader at my org. A few weeks ago she was abusive to me and I had to write an incidence report. I woke up to an email from her this morning and it instantly raised my blood pressure.

She doesn't understand that she is not my boss. She does not approve my workplan. But she wants to and makes everything 1000000x harder for me to do my job.

Also, who screams at staff? Crazy people. Crazier people scream at pregnant staff.

yogadevil

DH is a mild TW. I've started slowly making freezer meals for when the baby gets here, and DH kept sneaking entire handfuls of meatballs and then looked all sheepish saying "well we can just have this for dinner right?" It made me so edgy for some reason, it's hard enough to prep dinners in advance, I'm not doing that crap twice just because he thinks the kitchen is a perpetual free for all. New rule: If one sees an assortment of freezer ziplocs on the counter, one backs away slowly.

kirstynikole

My 2yo son somehow managed to break a glass jar of salsa on our light carpet in the middle of the living room. I literally sat my breakfast down on the dining table and walked into the kitchen to get my water, returned to a SPLAT. I used the carpet cleaner yet it still looks pink to me. Thankfully he didn't get any glass shard and he didn't smear the salsa but REALLY?!!!

edit: well now I feel like the TW because DS seems to not be feeling well this morning. 

jem89

@Gretchypoo That sounds terrible. I am sorry to hear that you have to deal with her. Maybe she should be removed from your work place? I cannot understand yelling at a pregnant woman. It feels like yelling at a baby or an elderly person and there is something so uncomfortably bad about it, to me.

My TW is the ultrasound place that called me at 9am to reschedule my AS (from 10:10am to 2:15pm). A lot of planning goes into an outing for me that I cannot entertain my 2 yr old and 11 month old at. Plus I need to pick up my kindergartener at 3:15 so there is no chance that I can do it all without babysitters. This meant that I have to get my dad to pick up my daughter from school (which meant a lot of planning for switching her car seat into his truck and coordinating with her school) and I had to find a babysitter for the other two. I know not everyone has so much planning involved with every move but I do so them changing my appointment time added so much stress and work. 

Gretchypoo

@jem89 she's a volunteer and I can't remove her. her behavior has apparently been discussed with her but I have to continue to work with her. it's fine, but she raises my blood pressure.

lap018

I nominate myself, whilst trimming the hedges this weekend I somehow managed to cut right through our $130 waterproof outdoor extension cord that was powering said hedge trimmer. I only blew like 10 fuses though so that was cool.... Thankfully we didn't have to replace the entire thing since DH just put a new head on it, although it is no longer waterproof. What a twatwaffle! 

glitterdragon-2

@BlondePeanut this sounds weird but try gurgling a little apple cider vinegar every couple of hours. Just gurgle it, you don't have to drink it. It should get rid of it. 

LaurenAshley04

TW
This cold... I think I'm going to use a few of the very few hours of sick time I have left and go home early. 

Im between punching this network admin and crying.
I am to hormonal and sick to deal with his mood swings. He knows the answer and solutions but doesn't "share them". And then speaks in his arrogant and condescending tone to me how stupid I am for not having these answers. Bitch please that is not even in our realm for our job description... nor my teams skill set. Train me if you want us to take it over. Do not make me re-invent the wheel. I am the only one (only girl) he talks to like this. He is NOT gods gift to IT. Please fast forward me to January so I can Quit?!

BlondePeanut

@GlitterDragon - thank you! i'll give that a try

jem89

@Gretchypoo Well I hope she gets it through her head soon and you don't have to deal with that any longer but I respect your perspective on it.

Vastra

@LaurenAshley04 ugh, what is it with IT Guy being the new Douche career? We have a piece of work here, who has zero idea how to do anything, is super duper condescending and thinks that restarting the machine Is the solution to everything. It's become a joke in my department that we all chant "don't be Greg,* don't be Greg, don't be Greg" when we call the general line for help. The other day, I was so not in the mood to talk to him that when he did answer I went "ooops, wrong extension!" and then called back to get someone else before he had a chance to hang up. 

*name changed. I'm not a monster! 

LaurenAshley04

@vastra It's a really common issue! 
Greg sounds like a jerk!

The worst part is - I'm part of IT! He's the "expert" for a bunch of stuff but doesn't want to teach! That's not how this works!!!

skiingstark

We have a wild fire near us that started yesterday that is near our city so that is bad. What sucks for me and my students, the wind is blowing the smoke and ash right on to our school so we need to keep our windows close. The issue, we have no air conditioning and we still go into the 80s... so now it is hot and smokey.

PerraSucia

Who has two thumbs and forgot deodorant this morning?

good thing i wore a dry clean only shirt. 

MrsDramaK

My coworker.  It's Rosh Hashanah so I said I would be available to do minimal and time sensitive work and she's called 5 times with stupid and unimportant things that could have waited until I was back in the office.

LivingLaVidaGinger

My OB is a TW. Not only did she refer to my baby as a "tumor" but she also laughed at me when I asked her if there was anything I could do about sciatic nerve pain. She told me "sometimes when we women are pregnant, we blatantly refuse to accept the fact that we are pregnant and resume the activities we did before we were pregnant." Like I get it, I am very aware I am pregnant, I've accepted that fact so much so that I haven't tasted alcohol in five months. And if my sciatic nerve pain is due to me sitting or going from sitting to standing, how the hell does she expect me not to do that? I hated that smug OB. She acted as if I were asking stupid questions. And don't call peoples babies tumors maybe?!

Spicyweiner

Well maybe I'm the TW, but guys, seriously. 
Just because you are pregnant does NOT mean you get to be talked to differently. 
Growing a person does not entitle you to be treated like a special snowflake, especially not like an elderly person or a baby. 
I totally get not being expected to like lift heavy shit or work with strong chemicals,  you don't get to be all "but I'm preeeeeeegnant! You have to be nice to meeeeeeeeee". 

Gretchypoo

Spicyweiner said:

Well maybe I'm the TW, but guys, seriously. 
Just because you are pregnant does NOT mean you get to be talked to differently. 
Growing a person does not entitle you to be treated like a special snowflake, especially not like an elderly person or a baby. 
I totally get not being expected to like lift heavy shit or work with strong chemicals,  you don't get to be all "but I'm preeeeeeegnant! You have to be nice to meeeeeeeeee". 

I do deserve to be spoken to like a competent human adult and not screamed at. I deserve to  not be abused. My case was so bad I put her on speaker so I would have witnesses and then had to write multiple incidence reports and she was disciplined. That's not me being sensitive, that is unprofessional behavior.

Also, you (not Spicyweiner, but you as in the abusive person) are just really a horrible person if you abuse me while pregnant. This person has no idea what is going on that could be going on with my pregnancy and I could have issues that their abuse exacerbates.

I'm not a snowflake or a child but I deserve respect, damnit.

Spicyweiner

I think you are missing my point. 
Everyone deserves respect, but you being pregnant has no bearing on that. Like, nobody should be nicer to you JUST because you are pregnant.

Gretchypoo

I agree with you that I'm not elderly or a child. But I do think hormones are a real thing.

Example: when my mom was going through menopause I was thoughtful abt how I phrased things bc I knew she got upset very easily. I was happy to do it bc I knew it was for a limited amount of time and I love her.

I feel like nobody owes it to me to walk on eggshells or be 100% positive all the time or kiss my ass. But common decency, respect and professionalism are a must for me. Being a dick when I'm pregnant is just an additional kick in the pants.

Spicyweiner

Crazier people scream at pregnant staff.

This is the line that bugged me. 
Is she crazy and rude? Hell yeah. But what does you being pregnant have to do with it?? 
Also I don't think you can compare menopause to being pregnant. 
You CHOSE to be pregnant. 

peachesnbean

The 2 moms at my daughter's elementary school who park in the drop off line and take their children in every.damn.day. I am so tired of it. They are Spanish speaking only, but it shouldn't be an issue because we've already gotten two reminders in addition to the beginning of the year parking lot guidelines. Two separate families. The parking lot is very poorly designed and it really gums up the works. I feel like saying something. 

Gretchypoo

I'm comparing menopause to pregnancy because the hormones can cause similar emotions. The comparison stops there.

As I said before, I think it is just an added layer of rude/ crazy. I'm happy to disagree here.

Spicyweiner

Gretchypoo said:

I'm comparing menopause to pregnancy because the hormones can cause similar emotions. The comparison stops there.

As I said before, I think it is just an added layer of rude/ crazy. I'm happy to disagree here.

We most definitely will have to agree to disagree. 

Vastra

Oh look, I went to lunch and came back with a new tw! The lady who blatantly, knowingly and rather haughtily cut in front of me in line. If she had apologized, corrected her gaffe or in any other way acknowledged it, I might have told her that her earring backing was missing. But she didn't, so....

grapeskittles4lyfe

Vastra said:

@LaurenAshley04 ugh, what is it with IT Guy being the new Douche career? We have a piece of work here, who has zero idea how to do anything, is super duper condescending and thinks that restarting the machine Is the solution to everything. It's become a joke in my department that we all chant "don't be Greg,* don't be Greg, don't be Greg" when we call the general line for help. The other day, I was so not in the mood to talk to him that when he did answer I went "ooops, wrong extension!" and then called back to get someone else before he had a chance to hang up. 

*name changed. I'm not a monster! 

OMG. Head of IT is the most condescending of self-enamored turd sticks I have ever had the misfortune to work with. He's leaving to work for his own company at the end of this year and our whole institute CANNOT wait.
He has single-handedly forced his IT dept, who are mostly super nice and amazingly helpful people, into paralysis. They aren't allowed to answer questions not submitted via the official form, even if it's only to request more toner for the hall copier. DUDE. How control-freaky do you have to get to need to control toner distribution?

Vastra

@grapeskittles4lyfe and they're all like

MamaD233

Spicyweiner said:

I think you are missing my point. 
Everyone deserves respect, but you being pregnant has no bearing on that. Like, nobody should be nicer to you JUST because you are pregnant.

Yeeeeeeees theyyyyy shoulllllllld!
*in my sniffly toddler wail that I never outgrew*

I personally think people should drop rose petals as we walk and be required to present various forms of nonalcoholic hydration on demand lolol

Because society would die out if we didn't choose to take the physical, emotional,  hormonal hit for the good of humanity. 


Back to your previously scheduled agreement to disagree 

srscott3

^I'm guessing this was a joke?

Spicyweiner

srscott3 said:

^I'm guessing this was a joke?

I sure hope so. 

expandcontract

I've had crappy experiences with IT people.  Ana of course, my husband is in that field. So I began asking my husband things like how long should a request for xx take to complete? His answer is usually a LOT shorter time than what my employers' IT people take.  

MamaD233

srscott3 said:

^I'm guessing this was a joke?

The rose petals part was lol. I would gladly accept bottled waters and juice boxes from friends and acquaintances like hard candy from a church lady's purse. And school lunch-sized milk cartons. 

I am serious about us doing critical work for humankind. People who fail to appreciate this are like those who hate little kids in my book. I'm like, fool, you had a momma - maybe if she had been treated more kindly, you would not be such a schmuck (not you as in pp's). Likewise, you were once a child, and I'm sure you were not perfectly behaved or met all the heavy judgments people place on 5 year olds. Have some respect for your own humanity. 

But then, if people were nicer in this world it would probably be unrecognizable to most of us. *shrug*

jem89

It's fine to disagree on the topic but my perspective is that stress has been shown to be of significant danger while pregnant so I do feel that should be respected. I wish I had my psych texts where studies were done on it but nonetheless, I do not award an individual who cannot control their emotions to have even the slightest possibility of negatively affecting my pregnancy.

yogadevil

Our species isn't endangered, I guess I don't feel entitled to be worshipped just because I chose to have a child. And I definitely don't hate children even though I feel this way. Just like no one should judge a 5 year old, I don't think judgements should be placed on adults, pregnant or not

srscott3

No one deserves to have someone else intentionally stress them out. Obviously. But that doesn't mean just because I'm pregnant, my life should be stress free and everyone else must make that happen. If that were the case, I should quit law school *because I'm pregnant* and most people here should quit their jobs *because they're pregnant*

What I find annoying are the people who take advantage of being pregnant as if it were a handicap. Not saying people on this board do, but I know people IRL who do. And it just seems AWish. Honestly, if you continue living your life like a normal human being and you don't force others to do things for you or treat you differently just because you're pregnant, they will likely treat you better all on their own. Just as an example..not once have I told my husband that he has to do something because I'm the one over here saving humankind or because I'm pregnant so I *deserve* special treatment. Never said that and never will. But because I don't act all entitled, he goes way above and beyond.

I like to think I would do the same thing if I wasn't pregnant but had an interaction with someone who was. Of course take care of the pregnant women of society. But if that pregnant woman's attitude was "treat me better than everyone else" that would seem pretty arrogant to me and I would be completely put off. 

PerraSucia

When there are desserts and stuff I get the bigger one because I'm pregnant. 

MommaBean

Yeah I'm not gonna turn down special snacks and treats because someone wants to feed the pregnant lady, but I would be really offended if someone treated me differently because I'm KU. Especially at work. Like, "you're extra sensitive with hormones right now, so ____."  Heck no. You think you've seen hormones? Just wait. 

(Not referring to the PP's situation - that lady sounds like she's being an asshole and I think everyone should act like a decent human being. But just in general; pregnancy is not relevant.)

skiingstark

jem89 said:

It's fine to disagree on the topic but my perspective is that stress has been shown to be of significant danger while pregnant so I do feel that should be respected. I wish I had my psych texts where studies were done on it but nonetheless, I do not award an individual who cannot control their emotions to have even the slightest possibility of negatively affecting my pregnancy.

Here is the main study I have heard of:

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/18665002

Here is an article that talks about it for people who do not want to read the study:
https://www.theglobeandmail.com/life/parenting/pregnancy-stress-during-1998-ice-storm-linked-to-genetic-changes-in-children-after-birth-study-suggests/article20868841/

But yeah high stress situations do effect our babies and can have long term consequences. This one of the reasons why I think so many schools that serve poor families have more IEPS. 

WinchesterGirl

@srscott3 I agree with you wholeheartedly. I have not asked for special treatment, but I have been truly touched by how much DH and others have gone above and beyond for me on their own. I do know several people IRL though who have told me the "best thing about pregnancy" is how you can expect everyone to treat you better. That is just weird in my opinion.