Crazy things you do b/c of the infertility... I can't be the only weirdo!

vssbrm

I posted this over on another thread (April/may success) but now I'm curious. 

What are the weird things that you do that are probably related to the battle with infertility??

Here is mine, it's bizarre, but hopefully not too?

So my husband figured me out. For my last apt w the RE he told me to bring my syringe containers w me so they could dispose of them. We went thru 3 big ones. I put them in my dresser drawer instead. I could not part w them. He was in my dresser looking for something for me and found them. He is utterly confused as to why I can't part w them. Honestly I am not sure either, I just can't. Not yet.  

AandDM2014

I still have all of my sharps containers, though I've been using them for almost a year.

dragonfaerie

I have my calendar and all of my paperwork still. And after I got my second beta, I went home and POAS just so I could finally have that stupid positive in front of my eyes.

mskeenan

Lol I'm sure I do tons of crazy things . I still randomly pee on sticks (at almost 30 weeks I know that's absurd and wasteful ) It just feels so good to see a positive after all the negatives .

i also have my sharps containers . And I have extra crinone and gonal f sitting around "just in case " . I know , I'm nuts . 

I also have my hand on my bump a ridiculous amount because it feels so good to have a bump that is baby and not excessive bloat from IVF meds . 

vssbrm

Thank you! I feel better now. I also have all my calendars and spare meds too!

I never did poas, I was too afraid that everyone was playing a big truck on me and it would be negative!

chicandbubbly

Yep... I still have my sharps container full of stuff.... And just realized my leftover Follistim is still in the fridge

kuposa17

I only just got rid of my sharps containers, but it was hard, I don't know why.

tvh1982

I had no problem getting rid of the medication. 
I was like, whoop whoop I don't need you!!
I do still have all my bills, calendars, brochures and what not together in a folder.
I also wrote down my journey in a notebook for me and maybe my little one one day.
And every time someone comments my belly, I for some reason have to tell them there's a baby in their. Like they might not see it

clt2pwm11

I check for blood Every. Single. Time. I.Wipe. also, I probably baby myself more than if I had easily gotten pregnant. I mean, I find any excuse to rest for awhile. It's quite silly.

yelllow22

@clt2pwm11 Me too! I had bleeding on week 6 and thankfully it stopped then ... It's week 15 and I still check Every Single Time!

flanners1

Knicker checking is definitely the most insane part of this journey. It starts with checking when period comes, when period ends, how much discharge, what colour consistency, texture, then spotting, no spotting... Argh  

capps42613

Not sure if I'd still do this or not if I didnt have IF issues but whenever I see a gender reveal video in my FB newsfeed, I have to watch it. Even when I have no idea who the couple is and one of my friends posted it lol

ADRIANAC1982

@clt2pwm11 and @yelllow22 ditto on the checking for blood every single darn time!  I feel more paranoid now than I have ever been and damn you google, worst thing ever while pregnant 

clt2pwm11

@ADRIANAC1982 I hear you on the Google! Today I googled "itchy nipples while pregnant." 

Tulips29

All of the above! I still have my containers and leftover meds. I have all my paperwork and weekly medication instructions from my nurse filed neatly in a gmail folder. I check for blood each time due to the 2 prior incidents. I google random crazy things. I peed on a stick after my BFP and still keep it in my medicine cabinet with the 2 lined facing me so I can see them each time I reach in there. I've had an urge to pee on a stick every time I question my sanity, luckily I don't have more laying around. I question every single thing and wonder if somehow I hurt the baby. I read every infertility story out there and cry each time because I can so relate. I cry in general, at everything. I keep telling myself I'm really pregnant, because it's still a disbelief that this process worked and there's a little human growing inside me (words I never thought I'd say)...and I rub my belly because it feels damn good. 

juliajoan

Oh the checking for blood! My vaginal progesterone pills are red, so my discharge is almost the color of blood and a have a mini panic attack every time I look. Who manufactures these pills and how do I find them to punch them in the face?! 

I also feel a little crazy but I talk to the baby whenever I'm alone in a room. Especially if I've just said something negative to someone else, like at work "oh I'm having a rotten day..." Once I'm alone I tell the baby that I'm actually having a great day because you're with me so don't worry about anything! 

tvh1982

That's so cute that you do that @juliajoan!

And the red pills?!? wtf, who does that! Glad mine were just white as I would have a minor heart attack every day.

vssbrm

A red pill?!? A man made that, or someone with a cruel sense of humor.

Tulumina

Here are some crazy things I've done:
- not making my prenatal appointment with the OBGYN as instructed by my RE office because I thought doing so would be tempting fate. At 8 weeks my RE nurse had to yell at me to do it.
- at my 7+6 week u/s everything looked good but on the drive home I worried that the doctor may have lied to me about the baby size and HB so I wouldn't get upset.
- of course always looking for blood.

We have been through 7 IVF cycles and this is our first pregnancy. At 8+1 weeks I still can't really believe it might work for us.

ale9687

@tulumina I was telling my sister yesterday I had to google everything after my nt scan because I thought the dr lied to me and said everything was good. Also after my first ob apt I obsessed that maybe the dr had me listen to my own hb and not the baby's so I wouldn't be upset he couldn't find it. My sister had to remind me they absolutely would tell me if something was wrong, they aren't go to lie to me just to keep me happy. 

kfras

@clt2pwm11 you are not the only one with the itchy nipples! My husband thinks it's in my head, and my coworker and I have an ongoing joke that she has to tell me if I'm subconsciously scratching my nipples at work. 

I totally agree on the checking for blood when I wipe. Not sure if I would be as worried about it if I had conceived naturally. 

I am sure I am definitely handling pregnancy differently than if we had naturally conceived. The wait to tell everyone about the BFP because I was so worried something would go wrong. Also, our immediate family and some of my close friends were so aware of everything happening and knew when all our dr appts were etc so now that I am pregnant I am trying my hardest to keep some of these moments more intimate for just DH and I to experience together. MIL, my mom and sister are pretty much freaking out about our gender reveal, but I haven't even told any of them which day my ultrasound appointment is. It's super weird I know, but we are trying to keep it as something for just the two of us to share for as long as we can... 

2legbaby

I am with the others who still have their stash of syringes and sharps containers that I just can't get rid of
Had spotting for the first 10 weeks and still freak out when I see a little blood when I wipe
Cry at diaper commercials or any others showing babies being held by their mothers
Feel like the more people I tell the more I may "jinx" our bfp and something will go wrong (even though this makes no logical sense)...

Glad to know that I am not alone