Dumb Questions - August 22nd Edition

MrsMaryK2016

I'm going to start this thread because I can't be the only one who has dumb questions and no one to ask them to. If it's popular, I'll keep it going weekly.

MrsMaryK2016

Where are you supposed to strap the carseat in? Drivers side? Middle? Passenger's side? I know it needs to be rear facing but is there a side that's better?

arcticseal-2

I think I've heard middle is best, and after that, it's theoretically equal.  For us, we don't have the lower anchors for the middle seat so the baby is behind the passenger, next child will go behind the driver, and our oldest (who can do up her carseat on her own) is going in the middle in our truck (as we won't fit in the car anymore (Pontiac Vibe)).   Also, it's not a dumb question.

kvruns

MrsMaryK2016 said:

Where are you supposed to strap the carseat in? Drivers side? Middle? Passenger's side? I know it needs to be rear facing but is there a side that's better?

I always assumed middle seat (unless you had other kids that made that impossible). I asked at BBB and the one girl said ummm I think side is best and then another lady was like nope middle is best, which makes sense because then you're not next to the side airbags. I've realized the downside with middle is if you want to put in one of those mirrors there is no where to hang it unless your middle seat has a headrest

kvruns

how do you feed/change a baby in the middle of the night if the kid is in your room? I asked this question to some people I know and they said desk lamp/clip on lamp - I never would have thought about that. 

jenesiso

I've always been told to keep with the legal codes, you have to have the seat installed at the local fire station.

kvruns

I have a question: 

how is many outfits to babies go through each day? I don't mean changes for special going out outfits but just a general day chilling at home. 2 + a sleeper? More? Fewer?

arcticseal-2

kvruns said:

I have a question: 

how is many outfits to babies go through each day? I don't mean changes for special going out outfits but just a general day chilling at home. 2 + a sleeper? More? Fewer?

I don't know but trust me it's a lot of laundry in those beginning days.   I'd say it's at least 2 or 3 though plus a sleeper. And in checking hospital/newborn photos it's about that.

kvruns

ArcticSeal said:

kvruns said:

I have a question: 

how is many outfits to babies go through each day? I don't mean changes for special going out outfits but just a general day chilling at home. 2 + a sleeper? More? Fewer?

I don't know but trust me it's a lot of laundry in those beginning days.   I'd say it's at least 2 or 3 though plus a sleeper. And in checking hospital/newborn photos it's about that.

That made me think of another. What do babies wear in the hospital? Just a diaper and those blankets? Or do you bring actual clothes (beside a going home outfit) ?

i think I might be good at this dumb question thread lol 

kmmnocal

MrsMaryK2016 said:

Where are you supposed to strap the carseat in? Drivers side? Middle? Passenger's side? I know it needs to be rear facing but is there a side that's better?

we are putting baby behind the passenger side. This way, I can see her easier from the driver's seat and she won't take up the entire back seat like she would if the car seat was in the middle. Also, our infant seat has one of those support arms that reaches to the floor and I don't even know if they can be installed in the middle. 

SandNStarsNJ

kvruns said:

ArcticSeal said:

kvruns said:

I have a question: 

how is many outfits to babies go through each day? I don't mean changes for special going out outfits but just a general day chilling at home. 2 + a sleeper? More? Fewer?

I don't know but trust me it's a lot of laundry in those beginning days.   I'd say it's at least 2 or 3 though plus a sleeper. And in checking hospital/newborn photos it's about that.

That made me think of another. What do babies wear in the hospital? Just a diaper and those blankets? Or do you bring actual clothes (beside a going home outfit) ?

i think I might be good at this dumb question thread lol 

These aren't dumb questions at all! In the hospital I go to the baby wears a diaper, a kimono shirt, a hat, and is swaddled - all of which is hospital provided. The only thing I brought with our first was a coming home outfit. 

@mrsmaryk2016 I'm pretty sure the middle is the legal ideal, but I have DD behind the driver's side which has worked out well for me. 

rspalding001

When DD was in our room we had a night light I kept plugged in to see by and a chair in the room. Some people nurse in bed.

rspalding001

As far as outfits go we really didn't need that many. Unless you are having blowouts you shouldn't need more than one a day, maybe we just got lucky but we almost never had a reason to change in the middle of the day until DD started eating solids which is just messy.

arcticseal-2

My girls wore sleepers in the hospital, but I'm in Canada so that could be different.   They roomed in with me pretty much the whole time so I was responsible for their care and it made sense for them to be in something....  Especially because there is lots of pictures... 

mrsmoose5

kvruns said:

ArcticSeal said:

kvruns said:

I have a question: 

how is many outfits to babies go through each day? I don't mean changes for special going out outfits but just a general day chilling at home. 2 + a sleeper? More? Fewer?

I don't know but trust me it's a lot of laundry in those beginning days.   I'd say it's at least 2 or 3 though plus a sleeper. And in checking hospital/newborn photos it's about that.

That made me think of another. What do babies wear in the hospital? Just a diaper and those blankets? Or do you bring actual clothes (beside a going home outfit) ?

i think I might be good at this dumb question thread lol 

It just depends on the day. I'd say average is 2 + a sleeper. Some days more, some days only one. My DS is 18 months now and this still holds true, he is always getting dirty playing outside, getting wet playing with the hose, getting food all over himself, etc. So I still usually end up going through 2-3 outfits a day.

As for the hospital, they do provide diapers, a kimono thing, and swaddle blankets. We only packed a coming home outfit for DS, but I ended up having an unexpected c-section, so DH ultimately had to go home and get more clothes, swaddles, etc. because we were there for 3 days. This time I'll bring more just in case. Also, relatives kept texting us to see pictures of him and after a while requested that we "get him out of the hospital clothes" lol. Looking back, I definitely prefer the hospital pictures we have of him when he is in his own outfits and blankets.

mrsmoose5

Ok my dumb question is for moms of 2 or more — how the hell do you manage to nurse a newborn while simultaneously chasing a toddler around, taking him to the park, playdates, making lunches, giving baths, etc. This is what's freaking me out the most about going from 1 to 2, I just remember spending so much time with DS sitting and nursing, but I can't imagine doing that now with a toddler who is super active and hates being cooped up in the house. It just doesn't seem possible ... but people do it, I guess?

Muscatmommyof4

I think everyone's questions are awesome lol.
I always buckled in the middle unless I was in a smaller car then I always buckled behind the passenger seat so I could see if I needed to. 

As for outfits its depends on the baby. My son I could use one outfit all day just changed him at night into a gown or sleeper with a zipper. DD #1 baby #2 it was pretty much the same except when she had blowouts which didn't happen often. But my DD #2 had acid reflux really bad and went through 5-6 outfits/sleepers a day if not more it was awful! But in the hospital I always brought a 2-3 different outfits the first few hours they were just in a diaper and swaddled but after that I always put a sleeper on them. 

@mrsmoose5 this will be baby #4 for me and I have to tell you when I had DD #1 my DS was only 22months and it was the hardest transition for me, DH and DS for the first 2-3months just because DS didn't  fully understand what's going on and so he would cry when she cried or he wouldn't come to DH or I if we were holding her we felt so guilty for having another baby it was awful at first but after everyone adjusted he became super protective and super lovable towards her and they are so close it's awesome! And I'm not saying it will be like that for you in the beginning but for me transitioning from 1-2 was hard...

kvruns

Thought of another  

How do you have (or plan to have) your baby's clothes organized? We have an armoire thing with like 5-6 small square drawers and 1-2 big rectangle ones plus a closet. Trying to decide how to organize clothes. Originally I was thinking use the drawers but we can hang stuff too. Do we put sleepers, socks, random stuff in drawers and just hang up the special matching outfits?

H is afraid if stuff is in drawers he'll forget about it but we were just given a ton of hand me down onesies and I just don't see hanging them all up (or I guess rotating out for sizes) since some will just be for wearing around the house. 

Not to mention sizes blow my mind. Some things say 0-3 and look giant, others are 3-6 and look teenytiny.  Ugh.

MollySm

I only hang dresses and special outfits when they are babies.  The rest I would put in bins or drawers.  Short sleeves, long sleeves, pants, sweaters, sleepers, etc.

BabyTaylor88

We are having a diaper and wipe shower and I dont have a clue how many packs of each size I will need. I hear that we should only get small amounts of Newborn and 1, but what's a small amount?? And how many size 2 and 3 is a good amount? 

rspalding001

regarding clothes, We hang everything except pants and throw socks /tights into a drawer. I keep stuff for the next size up hanging since some stuff is sized smaller than others and everything we are not ready to wear goes in a drawer.

Regarding diaper size, id personally not stock pile much over size 3. My daughter wore size 3 until she was ready to potty train whereas some kids I knew were in size 4 and up before they turned 1, so it just depends on how big your baby is and how fast they grow. In general a new born will go through as many as 10 diapers a day, but that goes down as they get older. By the time we were potty training we were using maybe 4 diapers a day as an example. Its all pretty subjective and depends on the baby but that might give you an idea of the high and low.

EvergreenIslandMama

Middle is safest for most cars. Contact your fire department, they usually have (or will know of) car seat specialists that will help you install your carseat and figure out what you're doing! We did this with our firstborn and it was a godsend.

kmmnocal

California moms PSA: the CHP does car seat installs. Call to make an appointment, they fill up! 

arcticseal-2

My first was 2.75 when my second came along.   You just do it.   It's hard to explain but everything just figured itself out.   However, with both kids when we came home from the hospital I had this huge overwhelmed feeling but that was where my husband and just doing life one thing at a time came in handy.

I have a four drawer dresser, sleepers in the top, onesies and socks/tights in the 2nd, 3rd is clothes, and 4th is the next size up.   Dresses and sweaters get hung in the closet (usually!).   Also, a tote in the closet for too big clothes that weren't the next size up or current size...

shevaCC

MrsMaryK2016 said:

Where are you supposed to strap the carseat in? Drivers side? Middle? Passenger's side? I know it needs to be rear facing but is there a side that's better?

@MrsMaryK2016 the safest place is where you can get a safe install and the driver can safely drive. If that's true for all 3 rear seats, the middle is *slightly* safer than the sides. These factors vary quite a bit from car to car and from car seat to car seat.  

Many cars don't have LATCH in the middle seat. While seat belt installs and LATCH installs are both fine, it's sometimes easier to figure out LATCH installs, so that's one factor that would favor installing on one side over installing in the middle. The safest car seat is the one that's installed/used correctly every single time.

Also many car seats take up a ton of room front to back. There are also a lot of cars that don't allow the car seat to be touching the front seat at all, requiring even more room front to back. This can make it difficult for the driver and/or passenger to position their seat as far back as they like. It's most important that the driver can sit in a safe position to drive. This might mean that the car seat can't be behind the driver, and may or may not be able to be in the middle seat, depending on the shape of your car's seats and your car seat.

Finally, with multiple kids it's often safest to keep the older kid further away from the baby (using either side rather than side plus middle) if he/she's not old enough to know not to mess with the baby. Also, as baby gets bigger it becomes more of a hassle to reach in and buckle them in the middle seat. So convenience comes into play too.

shevaCC

kvruns said:

how do you feed/change a baby in the middle of the night if the kid is in your room? I asked this question to some people I know and they said desk lamp/clip on lamp - I never would have thought about that. 

@kvruns, I use a nightlight in my room when I have a baby in my bed. I want to be able to see baby immediately when I wake up, I often need to see to be able to help baby latch on for breastfeeding, and it also puts off enough light for diaper changes. The light from the nightlight isn't ideal for sleeping, but newborns aren't ideal for sleeping either.

Re: outfits -- DD was a "happy spitter" -- she didn't seem to have reflux, but she spit up after nearly every feed for several months. So we went through a TON of outfits, blankets, etc. 5-6 per day for a while, plus a lot of changes of shirt for me too. DS didn't spit up much and was in 1-2 outfits a day most days, often only 1.

Re: hospital clothes -- my hospital provided a kimono top, diapers, and a hat for babies. I brought a sleeper and a coming home outfit for DD. I brought a onesie and a coming home outfit for DS. They were each in the hospital for just over 24 hours after birth.

MrsMaryK2016

@shevaCC Thank you! That's the best and most helpful answer for sure! I think I need to get my SIL's old carseat (I registered for the same one) and make sure it's all going to fit properly. I should be okay but I drive a small SUV and I'm not 100% convinced it's going to fit (especially if it can't touch the seat in front). 

shevaCC

mrsmoose5 said:

Ok my dumb question is for moms of 2 or more — how the hell do you manage to nurse a newborn while simultaneously chasing a toddler around, taking him to the park, playdates, making lunches, giving baths, etc. This is what's freaking me out the most about going from 1 to 2, I just remember spending so much time with DS sitting and nursing, but I can't imagine doing that now with a toddler who is super active and hates being cooped up in the house. It just doesn't seem possible ... but people do it, I guess?

@mrsmoose5, it's really tough at first. It helps to learn how to nurse in a baby carrier, but DD's life had to slow down quite a bit once DS was born since we were all in survival mode. We quit any scheduled classes since it was hard to be somewhere on-time for a while. 

Out of necessity I had to give DD a reasonable amount of freedom since I couldn't hover with a newborn. Going to the park was mostly doable, but I stuck to places with smaller climbing structures since I couldn't follow DD around. Bathtime was similar -- she (and now DS too) does her own baths with some reminders from me/DH while we sit just outside the open bathroom door observing but rarely intervening. Our easiest early outings were places where DD could run around contained and DS could hang out in a baby carrier (mall play area, smaller playgrounds). Or where DD was in the shopping cart/DS in the baby carrier. At home there was a lot of screen time in the early days.

Pre-planning is your friend. Use whatever help you have whenever you have it. I either put together lunches and snacks in the morning while DH was home or had things I could quickly grab. Same with dinners.

To be honest, it was hard and DD was upset about a lot of the changes at first. But she adjusted, DS grew and got a lot more interactive plus easier, and now she has no recollection of life before he was born. I'm hoping the transition from 2 to 3 is easier. Now they play together some of the time so I'm hoping she'll help entertain him when DD2 is nursing. Also he's never experienced that constant one-on-one attention she had before he was born. FX I'm not deluding myself, lol.

Muscatmommyof4

kvruns said:

how do you feed/change a baby in the middle of the night if the kid is in your room? I asked this question to some people I know and they said desk lamp/clip on lamp - I never would have thought about that. 

I always turned our tv on for light and made sure it was on mute. I coslept with all 3 kids and I plan to do the same with #4. 

squish143

@rspalding001 Yes! Same here. We almost never went through more than 1-2 outfits a day and then Jammie's at night. Now that he is a crazy active toddler I go through 2-3 outfits most days.

MrsMaryK2016

I've got another one! I knew this thread would be popular...

How do you go about finding a pediatrician you like? I mean I can read reviews online and talk to my SIL but do you go and interview them to make sure you like them too? What is the process if you don't already have kids?

rspalding001

Regarding Pediatrician's, yes you basically have to interview them. I mean for someone like me it was easy since Im not super picky, so I interviewed 1 person and was like OK yeah lets do it, but I know some people put more thought into it especially if they anticipate having a special needs child, or they prefer alternatives to traditional western medicine etc. Basically just let them know when you call to make an appointment that you are having your first baby and want to talk to the Dr to see if they would be a good fit for your family. It will cost you to see them, probably just a co-pay, but they get this kind of thing all the time so it wont be weird for them or anything and I'm sure they will be happy to answer your questions.

MrsBigTime

MrsMaryK2016 said:

I've got another one! I knew this thread would be popular...

How do you go about finding a pediatrician you like? I mean I can read reviews online and talk to my SIL but do you go and interview them to make sure you like them too? What is the process if you don't already have kids?

I asked some of my friends and coworkers who they used and I found that I had a large majority love a particular doctor and so we went with her and subsequently loved her. 
I didn't meet her before delivering, but I called her office to be sure she was able to take my daughter when the time came. 

kvruns

I've noticed my belly button getting more shallow each day, does that mean I'm finally going to "pop" out? Mine was pretty deep thanks to belly fat right over that area but it's definitely getting more shallow now 

MollySm

As far as doctors, we chose a family doctor instead of a pediatrician.   But the idea is the same.  Lots of people on my first BMB interviewed, but we just looked at reviews online, and then figured if we didn't click at the first appt we'd just try someone else at the second appt. 

As far as belly buttons, mine got more and more shallow, but has never popped. Thank goodness

kvruns

Can I bump this up - I thought of another  (blushing)

If you are using formula, and assuming the kid isn't picky, is there any reason you couldn't switch back and forth with brands? I'm still unsure of feeding plans but figure there will be some supplementing at a minimum. Any reason why I could use a similac sample, then an enfamil sample, etc ? Or is it best to stick with the same brand all the time? 

MollySm

You can switch back and forth, but it might be a bit much for their bellies to digest.  My kids are pretty good eaters, and were always fine if we switched, but I know other babies can have a harder time with transition.  They all smell so different, so I'm sure they taste different, which could cause issues too, but it really depends on the baby.  

mrsmoose5

I have another really dumb question for moms of 2 or more. How do/did you handle your toddlers or older kids and the new baby's stuff? For example, we already have this baby's crib set up and DS is always wanting to climb in it and play in there and I'm not sure if I should let him or maintain that it's not his. She's also gotten some stuffed animals, which he sees and instantly wants them and treats them like their his. I'm all about sharing, but I do feel like in the future she should have some things that are designated as hers and haven't been taken over and used by her older brother? Yes, no? I know at this age he doesn't understand that there's a baby on the way nor the concept of sharing, but I'm just wondering if I should set a few boundaries? 

MollySm

I would set some boundaries.  In particular the crib(I just think it's easier to be clear about sleep from the start, so the older ones don't get in the habit of going in and waking baby).   And then my kids both have lovies that they sleep with that are theirs and don't need to be shared.   Other than that, and breakable things (no climbing in vibrating chairs or carseats), everything else is shared, and we let the big one share from the beginning.  Things that belong in the baby's room, I always made sure to have the big kid put back in baby's room, so big kid knew it wasn't theirs, but I figured using the toys doesn't hurt anything. And it's hard for little kids to see new toys and not play with them.  

mrsmoose5

MollySm Thanks, that's what I'm thinking. My fear is that if I allow him to think everything that's going into that room is his, then when she does get here he's going to interpret it like I'm giving the baby HIS things, which I think will just make the transition harder. I've been putting her lovies and stuffed animals up high in the closet where he can't see/reach them. Of course, I will promote sharing of toys and most other things, I just think things like the crib and some special stuffed animals,loveys, etc should be just hers. 

MollySm

@mrsmoose5 - when he does use things that are hers, you can also already comment each time about how nice it is that she shares with him.  And mention that he'll share with her too once she's older.  Just to get him used to that frame of mind.