@Kashy17 I love both of the names Phoebe & Anna! You might have three A's but they are all different sounds (at least with my accent) so that seems okay to me. I know siblings that are Phoebe & Felix and that is way too similar for my taste even though the letters are different, they are pronounced Fee-bee & Fee-licks.
I think your right that they are different sounding enough. And it is really really growing on me the more I say it.
@madamerwin We found out over the weekend that we are having a girl and we are going with Evelyn! I think it is a beautiful, classic name. I think Sue would go with it as well.
I posted that we were pretty much set on Henry. Well then I got to thinking about how I've always liked the name Charlie. I added it to my top 3. The husband was not AS excited but didnt veto. Today at lunch, I asked our daughter if she could say each of the names. Out of nowhere she starts saying "Charlie's my favorite"
DH likes Esther, I like Abigail, I'm hoping we can find something we both love! We just found out it's a girl yesterday, so hopefully we'll come up with something!
DH likes Esther, I like Abigail, I'm hoping we can find something we both love! We just found out it's a girl yesterday, so hopefully we'll come up with something!
Abigail was the only other contender we had for a girl name this pregnancy or the last. It is another beautiful and classic name.
@Gretchypoo oh yeah kids are gonna figure out something regardless. i got called all sorts of stuff that rhymed with my name. i'm not too concerned about that.
Me: 36, H: 37 FTM, 2 Furbabies married 03/17/07 lived in Houston, Austin, Los Angeles and NYC due: 2/15/17
Major just seems like a title, like Sargeant, Captain, Mister, Deputy, etc.
Maybe he will be a super cool kid that can pull off a commanding sounding name? But what if he isn't? Also, what if he wanted to join the military someday? Would that be confusing or awkward?
Major just seems like a title, like Sargeant, Captain, Mister, Deputy, etc.
Maybe he will be a super cool kid that can pull off a commanding sounding name? But what if he isn't? Also, what if he wanted to join the military someday? Would that be confusing or awkward?
It would be a moot point since first names are rarely ever used.
@krob not sure which website you were looking at, but the one I'm on "baby center" has it listed as 476 so far in 2016. IMO anything past 200 isn't popular enough to skip naming your kid a name you love!! I get people that say the name they love they won't use if it's in the top 10, but 350-500??? You love it? ---> pick it!
I think we have finally decided on a name. We have been using it the last week or so just to see how we feel about it. DD learned the name and I just love hearing her try to say it...
Easton Charles the middle name will be after DH's grandfather who passed away when his dad was very young.
we will wait to announce the name until next weekend after we double check at the A/S that it is a boy.
We found out today that we're having a girl!!! I think that means we're set on a name. Of course as soon as we told friends/family that it's a girl, they asked if we have a name. I'm saying no for now because I'm not ready to reveal it to them, and I feel like we need to have a middle name set and then we can tell people. The name we're loving is Gemma. I think it's such a beautiful name and DH loves it too! So exciting to finally know the sex after waiting so long!
We are now leaning towards Albert, Thatcher, Neville or Louis for a boy's name. If I know myself at all, this baby will have a name by sunday. We find out the sex Friday and the girl's name is set.
DD1- Aug11 Angel Baby- June13, said goodbye Oct12 DD2- Aug13 DD3- due Feb17
It's funny, coming up with a middle name seems to be harder than the first name! Any ideas anyone? Our last name is one syllable and starts with a "SH" sound, I feel like a lot doesn't go with it.
It's funny, coming up with a middle name seems to be harder than the first name! Any ideas anyone? Our last name is one syllable and starts with a "SH" sound, I feel like a lot doesn't go with it.
Maybe something short and hard like Gemma Kate Sh____.
@pennylucille we have friends who named their daughter gemm@ h0pe z_____ (2 syllables). With 1 syllable last name I think you could do any number of syllables in the middle.
Me: 1979 * Husband: 1976 * Little girl: 2010 * Little guy: 2013 * MMC: 2016 * Last baby: EDD 2/11/17!
I would like honest opinions about this. Sorry this isn't a "happy" thing.
***TW/LOSS MENTIONED***
We have had 2 boy names we've been deciding between. My husband has always been leaning towards Austin Reid. This name has no significance we just like it. I've wanted William August. I like the name William, but it's also my husband's grandpa's name. It's been an open discussion for us. And now that we found out we are having a boy, it's been brought up between us again. We never shared these names with any family because we didn't want them pushing us towards what they like. And nobody but you girls know we found out the sex. So nobody will ever know the name we dont use.The thing is, most of you know my sister just lost her unborn baby boy at 39 weeks. He was named Benton William. (Benton was after our grandpa) William was a name taken from the baby's paternal grandpa. We had known they were naming the baby that the whole time, but I didn't think it would be a big deal for us both to use the name Willliam. Theirs was a middle name, ours would be a first name. But now that they lost the baby, I feel like it would be inconsiderate, and disrespectful to use that name. I would never want to do something hurtful to my sister and brother in law. The question is, am I making it into a bigger issue than what it really would be? Or am I right in thinking I should just scratch that name, especially since we never shared it with anyone to begin with.
@kswiger06 oh man I would ask my sister not tell her you know what you're having for sure but be like "william was on our boy list and we wanted to know your feelings about it"
I probably wouldn't just because I would be afraid everytime she heard his name it may remind her of her baby. I feel like middle names wouldn't click as much, so maybe use it that way if you really like it? That's tough. If it were me, I would say it's okay even if it wasn't, which would be my hesitation from just asking her.
Ps. It's really thoughtful of you to have her feelings so close. A lot of people might not even think twice about it
@kswiger06 I'm leaning towards avoiding Will. 39 weeks is just so traumatizing. It really depends on your sister, though. That loss is going to be very raw for a long time, it depends on how she'll process those feelings. The name is going to hurt, but anything baby will for a while. Would she take it hard and emotionally and hold it against you, form up a fued-type anger, or would she be able to remember that it's a family name on both sides, and not meant to remind her.
@Lafreeman21 I honestly don't know how she would take it. It's weird because she just called me about half hour ago and was asking me about my pregnancy. I've been somewhat avoiding her, because well, I feel terrible and don't want to upset her, and because I get upset everytime I think about her. She'd never get super angry and tell me off or anything, but I could see a possibility of her being upset and holding a grudge, maybe complaining to other people about it. Not saying she would, but if she did get mad, I think that's how it would play out. But I can also imagine her being ok with it, and feeling a connection, since we were pregnant together. I really don't know though. We've never had this type of experience or situation.
I'm going to agree with others that I'd probably not use it. It is so incredibly thoughtful of you to think of her feelings and I do think she may associate the name with her loss. It just seems too close for comfort.
With that said, I do like Austin Reid a lot, as well as August. Or maybe you could do a portion of William and just use Liam?
@kswiger06, If it was the middle name, I think she might be ok, or even honored. But as a first name I agree, its going to be too raw and I think it could cause pain. You should talk to your sister. Hugs.
Married - 7/29/06 Ben and Maggie - 4/10/09 Mia - 6/16/11 Surprise! due 2/23/17
@leslie1331 I wouldn't want for anybody to be constantly reminded (unpleasantly) of the baby either, which is a part of why I would feel it to be inconsiderate.
@PerraSucia thanks for the advice, if I still feel like I really want to use the name, I definitely think it would be a good idea to mention it to her, before anyone else, the way you suggested.
Also just as a side note don't avoid your sister just because your pregnant.. just don't talk about baby stuff with her.
I know, it's just hard. I feel like I don't know what to say since for the last few months we talked about nothing but baby stuff. Today was a mix of topics, but I never said anything baby related unless she asked a direct question. She did tell me to call her though, so I know I need to.
You're so sweet @kswiger06 and such a great sister. I probably would err on the side of avoiding the name to be safe, but in general, big hugs about the whole situation.
That is such a tough situation.. in my heart I'd probably avoid the name all together. The wound is very raw, and will stay raw. I don't think she'd be 'angry' that you used the name per se, but I imagine a deeper hurt everytime she heard the name. This isn't a case where you used a baby name and she wasn't even pregnant, this is a loss of a child and that's an incredibly delicate situation to navigate.
You know your sister best, and maybe as you talk more the answer will come to you. I also want to say what a beautiful spirit you have to consider her feelings on the matter. I know this has been so tough on all of you, and at least there's a lot of love and support in your family to lean on
@kswiger06 I think I would also avoid the name. While in 5 years it may be less painful to hear, by February it is going to still be very fresh and raw. She has gone through a very traumatic experience, and any constant reminder will likely be painful.
That said though, I would not avoid her! It is definitely an awkward situation you are in, but if you feel uncomfortable about it, just allow her to lead if she is ok to discuss the topic. You said she has brought it up a few times, so she is obviously still thinking about you and your LO. You are a very sweet sister to be thinking about this, and to keep her feelings at the forefront.
@kswiger06 I wouldn't use the name. The only exception I'd consider is if you had a heart to heart conversation and asked your sister how she would feel if you used it to honor her son.
I'm worried about you not talking to her much though and not discussing her baby and yours.
I lost premature twins last year and a lot of my relationships have changed. Sometimes people do say the wrong things, but the most hurtful and distancing have been those that don't say anything at all. My own family/siblings never mention my babies and don't address how we might be feeling. It feels like they've forgotten or don't care (or realize?) that losing a baby is a grief that never goes away. Every day we think of them, miss them, and carry the grief of their deaths. Those that can acknowledge that are easier to be around and feel close to.
I'm so much closer now to the friends that kept the conversation going, that weren't afraid to cry with me, not afraid to ask about my babies and how we were/are feeling.
PS- I'm sure grieving is different for everyone. I hope it's ok to try to give advice.
Re: Names
Although I did do a search and it's more common than I thought.
Big Bro 7/14/13
Little Bro 2/6/17
FTM, 2 Furbabies
married 03/17/07
lived in Houston, Austin, Los Angeles and NYC
due: 2/15/17
"But what about Henry? Is Henry your favorite?"
"No! Charlie is my favorite."
....
I think our kid has chosen.
that being said, my name doesn't allow nicknames but I got lots anyway.
@BumpasaurusRex Labia Majora made me choke on my drink
@Gretchypoo My mind went to the same dark place. I can just hear the mean little kids saying "Hey look! There goes Major Loser!"
ME: 25, DH: 27
TTC #1 since 09/2015
Miscarriage @ 10 wks 02/28/2016
BFP 05/28/2016!
FTM, 2 Furbabies
married 03/17/07
lived in Houston, Austin, Los Angeles and NYC
due: 2/15/17
Maybe he will be a super cool kid that can pull off a commanding sounding name? But what if he isn't? Also, what if he wanted to join the military someday? Would that be confusing or awkward?
My MIL suggested we use my Mum's name if baby is a girl. My Mum died last year. I know she meant well, but, no.
Easton Charles
the middle name will be after DH's grandfather who passed away when his dad was very young.
we will wait to announce the name until next weekend after we double check at the A/S that it is a boy.
DD1- Aug11 Angel Baby- June13, said goodbye Oct12 DD2- Aug13 DD3- due Feb17
It's funny, coming up with a middle name seems to be harder than the first name! Any ideas anyone? Our last name is one syllable and starts with a "SH" sound, I feel like a lot doesn't go with it.
***TW/LOSS MENTIONED***
We have had 2 boy names we've been deciding between. My husband has always been leaning towards Austin Reid. This name has no significance we just like it. I've wanted William August. I like the name William, but it's also my husband's grandpa's name. It's been an open discussion for us. And now that we found out we are having a boy, it's been brought up between us again. We never shared these names with any family because we didn't want them pushing us towards what they like. And nobody but you girls know we found out the sex. So nobody will ever know the name we dont use.The thing is, most of you know my sister just lost her unborn baby boy at 39 weeks. He was named Benton William. (Benton was after our grandpa) William was a name taken from the baby's paternal grandpa. We had known they were naming the baby that the whole time, but I didn't think it would be a big deal for us both to use the name Willliam. Theirs was a middle name, ours would be a first name. But now that they lost the baby, I feel like it would be inconsiderate, and disrespectful to use that name. I would never want to do something hurtful to my sister and brother in law. The question is, am I making it into a bigger issue than what it really would be? Or am I right in thinking I should just scratch that name, especially since we never shared it with anyone to begin with.
Ps. It's really thoughtful of you to have her feelings so close. A lot of people might not even think twice about it
Married: 10/10
EDD: 8/27/16 MMC 1/16
Rainbow Boy: 2/04/17
TTC: 4/18 BFP: 1/2/19
EDD: 9/6/19
With that said, I do like Austin Reid a lot, as well as August. Or maybe you could do a portion of William and just use Liam?
Suggestions:
Reid August
Liam Reid
August Reid
August Liam
Big Bro 7/14/13
Little Bro 2/6/17
Ben and Maggie - 4/10/09
Mia - 6/16/11
Surprise! due 2/23/17
@PerraSucia thanks for the advice, if I still feel like I really want to use the name, I definitely think it would be a good idea to mention it to her, before anyone else, the way you suggested.
You know your sister best, and maybe as you talk more the answer will come to you. I also want to say what a beautiful spirit you have to consider her feelings on the matter. I know this has been so tough on all of you, and at least there's a lot of love and support in your family to lean on
That said though, I would not avoid her! It is definitely an awkward situation you are in, but if you feel uncomfortable about it, just allow her to lead if she is ok to discuss the topic. You said she has brought it up a few times, so she is obviously still thinking about you and your LO. You are a very sweet sister to be thinking about this, and to keep her feelings at the forefront.
I'm worried about you not talking to her much though and not discussing her baby and yours.
I lost premature twins last year and a lot of my relationships have changed. Sometimes people do say the wrong things, but the most hurtful and distancing have been those that don't say anything at all. My own family/siblings never mention my babies and don't address how we might be feeling. It feels like they've forgotten or don't care (or realize?) that losing a baby is a grief that never goes away. Every day we think of them, miss them, and carry the grief of their deaths. Those that can acknowledge that are easier to be around and feel close to.
I'm so much closer now to the friends that kept the conversation going, that weren't afraid to cry with me, not afraid to ask about my babies and how we were/are feeling.
PS- I'm sure grieving is different for everyone. I hope it's ok to try to give advice.