I've said it before, but I'm strongly in favor of encouraging individual threads. This board is very slow IMO. To be fair, I don't read any of the daily threads because I don't want (or have time) to sort through a bunch of stuff I'm not interested in. I think there are nice ways to link someone to a recent discussion on the same topic, but most of the time I think it's just easier to ignore so the topic doesn't keep getting bumped to the top. I definitely feel discouraged from starting threads on this board because of some of the responses others have gotten.
I'm so happy that this post came up so we can all have our opinions heard
1. I love the individual threads I feel like it's more organized that way.
2. Love the search bar option.
3. I hardly ever read the randoms.. it's too much jumbled info..I get lost in that thread
4. The GKTY thread is not for me but I know some ladies like it so enjoy it
5. It makes me sad when I read the snarky comments bc I think omg these women are about to be mothers..are their children the ones that are likely to bully..
A good example is the first blump/bump I think that poor girl decided not to come back to the board after being attacked the way she was.
6. Lastly I'm happy you all are here. I am learning so much from you all and this board is very helpful. I'm also happy that it's a democratic board so why dont we place a poll to ensure that we have a clear picture of what the board wants
I really didn't see that blump/bump controversy as an attack and it was pretty tame in my opinion. Those of us who weren't in favor of it just voiced our opinions with a "you do you, but I don't think anyone wants to see my blump" kind of response. No one said "hey stops posting pics here" or called names or anything bad. But also, even if it did escalate beyond that, you can't dictate how someone will react on the internet. You just keep doing you and ignore the ones you don't like.
Previously PaukMeKiande
Surprise BFP/MC February 2011 BFP May 16th 2016
EDD January 25 2017 DD born January 30 2017 Surprise BFP/MC April 2017
I think @Lecool and @mommywesley and @karaelaine1991(eta) hit the nail straight on the head, and eloquently stated the things my hormone-riddled brain could not string together properly.
Thank you for posting this! I was literally thinking the same thing. The response of "there were some good responses to that question in such-and-such thread if you want to check them out" is totally helpful but I've seen a lot of snarkiness towards people that is not meant to be helpful. I'm with you, if you aren't interested in or are irritated by a particular thread, just keep on scrolling.
Thank you for phrasing it like you did! I have no problem when someone suggests a thread with similar questions/responses and then adds their two cents. However, I've seen quite a few downright rude responses to things that just stops that person's question in its tracks or has the person defending why they started a new discussion.
To those, like myself, that don't have a past on any bump boards I personally could care less individual vs threads. I just come on for the sense of community because I participate on anything that I find interesting. I do feel there is a clique mentality on here and if bumpers have been together for awhile I get it but be nice to everyone and re-read something before you post. We're all hormonal and sometimes it gets the best of us myself included. @emilyn2012 thank you for saying something and I don't believe it's rude at all.
I really enjoy the individual threads. I find them far easier to navigate. The wealth of information is presented in a way my brain finds more organised. I think maybe people who have different learning and organisational styles are drawn in different directions and because of this we need both. The random thread is different to other weekly threads in my opinion. I expected it to be talking about random not baby related stuff. Not useful questions or discussions mixed with chat. Thinks like the symptom threads are great and are really useful. They are naturally going to circle as our dates can be 31 days apart and people are going to have and this keeps everything tidy. However if people have concerning symptoms like bleeds that they want immediate feedback on an individual is warranted. Honestly this has been the biggest repeat topic and i'd rather we had it to address it everyday than these women feel unsupported. No one is forced to read every individual thread or every long thread so both approaches can be supported. To be completely honest I have avoided commenting, asking questions or participating for fear of upsetting people by starting an individual thread. But when I have talked about things that are important to me in bigger threads I have hardly any responses and my post gets buried so I gave up. I think now we have a greater number of people here a poll or two to sort out people's preferences and maybe we can make our own adjustments to the standard set of rules to suit the collection of personalities we have. I also agree with @BrennansMom2012 I think hormones are definitely factoring into our discussions and occasionally our tone and patience levels with each other.
I like the individual threads too and I was a regular on the GP board a couple of years ago so I'm not really new to all this. I never read the randoms thread because I'm busy at work all day and can only check in for a couple mins here and there.
I think we have room for both the randoms thread and individual threads. It's not like we have a limited amount of bandwidth. I also understand why people like the strict organization that boards like TTGP have, but I don't think they are necessary on a BMB. If TTGP didn't have rules, it would be chaos. It would be nothing but hundreds of 'am I pregnant?' threads from people who would then never post there again. On a BMB, our population should eventually stabilize and we will be going on this journey together, so there isn't the need to guard against a daily influx of the same questions over and over.
Also, I am amazed with how well we are all getting along so far. We're all closing in on the end of 1st tri and we haven't had any major drama or bannings or GBCB's. We're sitting here actually rationally discussing how we would like the board to work rather than dividing into two 'sides' of the issue. I think this is shaping up to be an awesome BMB!
Agreed! On my last bmb people just posted whatever wherever they wanted, there were no rules about needing to stay in a thread topic and it was great. I don't give a hoot about how "messy" the board looks. If I see a topic that's clearly something that's already been discussed or I'm not interested in then I don't open it.
I think we're all coming from a great place with our intent on mega v individual threads. We all want the best outcome... I can't argue with the intent and goal of what was stated here regardless of my personal thoughts. Ok now... maybe I'm the one to start drama then @sagoon. Sorry.
Personally I can only check the boards once or twice a day, and I'm strictly mobile. When I check at the end of the day, and have to scroll half way down the 2nd page to see something unread... I no longer want to even try many days. Too much. Though, I am still here.
The argument that the board is too slow, but you only read half the posts because 'it's what I want' annoys me. We all have these responses to create a better community, but you're agreeing you don't want the community when the community might need you. Only when you need the community. That's not what community means to me... hence I'm still here. I get not participating in threads that don't apply (ie TTGP grads if new to tb, or PGAL for first pregnancy), but to ignore half the board just because. I don't get it.
Sorry if this is our first big drama, but I think more than the issue of mega v individual threads.... What we want to define as community might matter more to our future together on this bmb.
I don't think she meant ignoring posts based on "what I want" but based on certain topics she could relate to. Some on here are not going to relate to cloth diapering, or breastfeeding etc. I don't think them skipping those is being selfish or not putting effort into the bmb.
And yes, the board is slow, when there are only 10 topics and 7 don't relate to me (TTGP, PGAL, PCOS, AMA, etc) that isn't because I don't want to read those, and sometimes I do just to feel connected to the ladies that are going through that.
I dunno, I get what you all are saying, but I also get what the others are saying. It's completely different jumping into topics that appeal to you and not those that don't vs ONLY starting threads to get your answers but never offering answers to others, which I think we've noticed a few people do that, and I think that is tacky and rude.
I don't think she meant ignoring posts based on "what I want" but based on certain topics she could relate to. Some on here are not going to relate to cloth diapering, or breastfeeding etc. I don't think them skipping those is being selfish or not putting effort into the bmb.
And yes, the board is slow, when there are only 10 topics and 7 don't relate to me (TTGP, PGAL, PCOS, AMA, etc) that isn't because I don't want to read those, and sometimes I do just to feel connected to the ladies that are going through that.
I dunno, I get what you all are saying, but I also get what the others are saying. It's completely different jumping into topics that appeal to you and not those that don't vs ONLY starting threads to get your answers but never offering answers to others, which I think we've noticed a few people do that, and I think that is tacky and rude.
Re: Can I ask a kinda rude question?
BFP May 16th 2016
DD born January 30 2017
Surprise BFP/MC April 2017
To those, like myself, that don't have a past on any bump boards I personally could care less individual vs threads. I just come on for the sense of community because I participate on anything that I find interesting. I do feel there is a clique mentality on here and if bumpers have been together for awhile I get it but be nice to everyone and re-read something before you post. We're all hormonal and sometimes it gets the best of us myself included. @emilyn2012 thank you for saying something and I don't believe it's rude at all.
I think maybe people who have different learning and organisational styles are drawn in different directions and because of this we need both.
The random thread is different to other weekly threads in my opinion. I expected it to be talking about random not baby related stuff. Not useful questions or discussions mixed with chat.
Thinks like the symptom threads are great and are really useful. They are naturally going to circle as our dates can be 31 days apart and people are going to have and this keeps everything tidy. However if people have concerning symptoms like bleeds that they want immediate feedback on an individual is warranted. Honestly this has been the biggest repeat topic and i'd rather we had it to address it everyday than these women feel unsupported.
No one is forced to read every individual thread or every long thread so both approaches can be supported.
To be completely honest I have avoided commenting, asking questions or participating for fear of upsetting people by starting an individual thread. But when I have talked about things that are important to me in bigger threads I have hardly any responses and my post gets buried so I gave up.
I think now we have a greater number of people here a poll or two to sort out people's preferences and maybe we can make our own adjustments to the standard set of rules to suit the collection of personalities we have.
I also agree with @BrennansMom2012 I think hormones are definitely factoring into our discussions and occasionally our tone and patience levels with each other.
I never read the randoms thread because I'm busy at work all day and can only check in for a couple mins here and there.
Also, I am amazed with how well we are all getting along so far. We're all closing in on the end of 1st tri and we haven't had any major drama or bannings or GBCB's. We're sitting here actually rationally discussing how we would like the board to work rather than dividing into two 'sides' of the issue. I think this is shaping up to be an awesome BMB!
Jan17 Sept Sig: Pumpkin Spice gone too far
SaveSave
Ok now... maybe I'm the one to start drama then @sagoon. Sorry.
Personally I can only check the boards once or twice a day, and I'm strictly mobile. When I check at the end of the day, and have to scroll half way down the 2nd page to see something unread... I no longer want to even try many days. Too much. Though, I am still here.
The argument that the board is too slow, but you only read half the posts because 'it's what I want' annoys me. We all have these responses to create a better community, but you're agreeing you don't want the community when the community might need you. Only when you need the community. That's not what community means to me... hence I'm still here. I get not participating in threads that don't apply (ie TTGP grads if new to tb, or PGAL for first pregnancy), but to ignore half the board just because. I don't get it.
Sorry if this is our first big drama, but I think more than the issue of mega v individual threads.... What we want to define as community might matter more to our future together on this bmb.
And yes, the board is slow, when there are only 10 topics and 7 don't relate to me (TTGP, PGAL, PCOS, AMA, etc) that isn't because I don't want to read those, and sometimes I do just to feel connected to the ladies that are going through that.
I dunno, I get what you all are saying, but I also get what the others are saying. It's completely different jumping into topics that appeal to you and not those that don't vs ONLY starting threads to get your answers but never offering answers to others, which I think we've noticed a few people do that, and I think that is tacky and rude.
DS1 - 03/31/2006
DS2 - 12/31/2008
DS3 - 06/26/2012
DS4 - 08/07/2014