TW Tuesday

Shiva14

Who's being a twatwaffle in your life?

AmMcc12

Ahh I just posted this as well! I'll turn mine into a gif party

Shiva14

My across the street neighbor is being a HUGE twatwaffle. We spent the 4th with my parents because they have an awesome view of the fireworks. Today we found tons of trash in our driveway and firework trash all over DH's car. Even worse, we found red dust (gun powder I'm assuming from the rockets) all over DS' slide in the backyard. The backyard is fenced in, so means they were shooting fireworks over our house into the woods behind our house. Jackasses. 

I have no proof it was them, but our only other neighbor is a sweet elderly couple who we are on very good terms with. I've never seen them set off fireworks while we've been here, so I highly doubt it's them.....

Shiva14

AmMcc12 said:

Ahh I just posted this as well! I'll turn mine into a gif party

Great minds think alike hahaha. Or maybe it's the 3rd trimester turning everyone around us into twatwaffles...

abberson

People who put their seats all the way back on airplanes without care or asking are twatwaffles. Seriously. I'm pregnant and dealing with a 3 year old, constantly having to pull stuff out of my bag 'o tricks to entertain her. I had to shoulder into her seat a few times as I reached down for said bag and got glared at. As she listened to headphones and read a magazine (not even sleeping!?). WTF. Also, airlines are TW for how little cramped airplane seats are anyway.

AnnaS930

My MIL was a TW all weekend long. I've posted about her just about everywhere else so I don't want to get too far into it, but a summary includes:
- Comparing everything my son does to my husband, because he's just the most perfect specimen to ever walk this planet
- Trying to encourage my son to go to her while I was comforting him (after I accidentally nearly wiped him out by putting a chair in his running path)
- Shouting with laughter at 9pm while my son was asleep, while repeating EVERY line of the episode of Full House she was watching (is she 12 years old?)
- Talking constantly about her weight loss and everything else going on in her life
- Trying to help with the Baby-Q, then telling every guest exactly what she did in preparation (which was very very little.. as in she made lemon bars that we forgot to take out of the fridge) as if it was her own party

and the list goes on and on and on...

AnnaS930

Also, a baby app that I use is a TW today.  The quote is about baby's immunity and adds "2.0 just needs your milk in the first year or so to become a sickness-fighting machine"  ... don't you be pushing breastfeeding too hard on me now.. you're lucky you're a free app!

ElcaB

My legs are being twatwaffles because I was up ALLLLLLLLLLL night with the worst leg cramps ever. 

mrsvoorhees-2

@AnnaS930 my DD was breastfed for 15 damn months and was sick freaking monthly. That app is indeed a TW.

I don't really have any good Crinkle Cut stories for you today. But I did just realize that it's freaking July and she still isn't engaged but also still
thinks she will get married in October. And they're paying for their own wedding. And she wants a $30,000
ring and he approved of it, and she said they are wanting to go to Europe for 2 weeks for the honeymoon AND the dress she wants is no less than $10,000.  They aren't rich. They aren't hurting for money either, but they definitely aren't wealthy enough to pay for all of that. I just wonder how she thinks they're going to pay for all of this. And inside, I'm thinking that I'm looking forward to none of it working out for her and then I remember that just like everything else in her Crinkle Cut world, it will. she will
get it all. 

jhems776

So we moved in on Thursday and I thought wow this building is nicely sound proof, I don't hear my neighbors at all. I guess they were on vacation. I hang hear them pretty good along with a yappy/howling dog. Well I guess in a few months I'll be the loud neighbor. 

kosmo86

@MrsVoorhees - when I was engaged last year ads kept popping up for a company that does "wedding loans up to 100k". I always wondered who would want to put themselves in so much debt for 1 day, but now I wonder if these were geared specifically to people like crinkle cut. I am guessing these people are still paying off the loan years after the divorce!

geminigirl16

@MrsVoorhees Years ago I worked with a girl who planned her wedding before her boyfriend proposed. She would monitor his bank account to see if any large movements of money were made and when she finally got the ring, she a) hated it and asked for another one that she preferred more and b) got upset at how he proposed because she had a cold and didn't feel or look as nice a she wanted when she was proposed to. 

She is now divorced. Karma.  

yellowrose314

Our neighbours upstairs are TW's. I know our (shared) landlord extremely well, since I was about 5 years old. When we moved in, she wrote it into our lease that the entire left side of the driveway was ours, enough to park our two cars side by side. Three girls live upstairs, two of them are lovely, but the other one... I've started calling her Bitchy McCuntyface. For some reason in the last 2 months she keeps parking behind my car. 99% of the time I don't care because she's gone before I have to go somewhere, but I had to go to work early (about 830 am), and I had to go knock on her door and unfortunately woke her up to ask her to move her car because there was no way I could get around her. She was not pleased. That night DH used my car, and when he got back she was parked in my spot, so he parked behind her, but I didn't realize it at the time because I was in for the night, I'm not that passive aggressive, I probably would have just parked behind DH... next morning she's hammering on our door yelling at us to "move your godamn car" and yelled at DH and I for always parking in her spot. I stayed calm, apologized for parking behind her, but explained that our landlord had said those spaces were ours. She said that's not how this works, there's 3 bedrooms upstairs, you have 1 bedroom downstairs therefore we get 3 spaces and you get one. Which I would agree with, except it specifically says in our lease "two side by side parking spaces on left side of driveway" that's included in our rent. She didn't believe me, so I told her to take it up with our landlord.
Literally that afternoon, she ran over one of the sprinkler heads on the right side of the driveway/lawn, the side that's THEIR designated parking. I saw her do it, and she looked at the fountain spewing in the driveway and drove off, I don't think she saw me standing there with my jaw on the floor. So I called the landlord to let her know, but Bitchy McCuntyface beat me to it and blamed DH!!!!!! Even though he was at work. My landlord was confused because she knows we don't park on the right side of the driveway and I had to explain to her that it was actually that bitch who drove over the sprinkler. She believed me, since she knows me, but I felt almost like I was tattling, which is ridiculous. She asked if we've been having lots of problems with this girl, and I said besides the parking issue this was the only thing, and I didn't exactly appreciate her trying to frame my husband for something she did. Landlord was super understanding and said she would come over and talk to BMC. Haven't heard anything yet, but I'm sure I will eventually... 

sorry for length!!

rock1cherry

People thinking it's cool to set off fireworks consistently from about 10:30 pm - well after 1 am are TW's! How did they not run out of fireworks in that amount of time?? 

LakeR2014

@yellowrose314 what was that chicks deal?! She definitely has a huge attitude problem?  Has she always been doing the three parking spot thing or is that a recent thing.  Either way blaming your DH is NOT cool.  Keep us updated on it.  

abberson

My mom is a TW for putting the most unflattering picture of me from
this weekend on FB. It was with my 4 sibs and we don't get together often, so I understand she wanted to put one up. But there were like 15 shots of the 5 of us, and she picked the one where my mouth is hanging open, my arm is pressed flat wide against my side at a terrible angle, and she cropped it so you can't tell I'm pregnant it just looks like I gained a bunch of weight. Awesome. Thanks. 

Eta: As an extra fun bonus, it's now her cover photo.

yellowrose314

LakeR2014 said:

@yellowrose314 what was that chicks deal?! She definitely has a huge attitude problem?  Has she always been doing the three parking spot thing or is that a recent thing.  Either way blaming your DH is NOT cool.  Keep us updated on it.  

@LakeR2014 I have no idea what her problem is, other than being a passive aggressive wiener. And it's funny because one of the other girls said she doesn't understand why she started parking behind me, because she's always just parked behind one of them. So I feel like we've done something else that's pissed her off to make her start parking behind me, but for the life of me I can't figure out what it is; we're not loud, the other girls said they've never ever heard us downstairs through the floor. If she confronts me again maybe I'll ask her exactly what we did to rub her the wrong way. 
Update on the landlord situation though... she came over about half an hour ago to talk to the girls about who's going to pay for the sprinkler head. She came downstairs and talked to me after and told me that the bitchy one maintains it was Brandon who parked there, to which I was like that's impossible, it was 2 pm in the afternoon, he was at work, you can check with his boss if you want to. Landlord was like I don't believe her for a second, out of all 3 of them I like her the least. The other two girls said that they've never ever seen us park on the right side of the driveway, always the left, so they pretty much called out the third girl for lying. Landlord has told them that the far left two spots are ours, end of story. BMC wasn't too happy about that, but landlord said if I have any more issues to let her know. I feel bad for the other two girls though, because the bitchy one wouldn't fess up, landlord said she would just take it out of their group damage deposit. 

LakeR2014

yellowrose314 said:

LakeR2014 said:

@yellowrose314 what was that chicks deal?! She definitely has a huge attitude problem?  Has she always been doing the three parking spot thing or is that a recent thing.  Either way blaming your DH is NOT cool.  Keep us updated on it.  

@LakeR2014 I have no idea what her problem is, other than being a passive aggressive wiener. And it's funny because one of the other girls said she doesn't understand why she started parking behind me, because she's always just parked behind one of them. So I feel like we've done something else that's pissed her off to make her start parking behind me, but for the life of me I can't figure out what it is; we're not loud, the other girls said they've never ever heard us downstairs through the floor. If she confronts me again maybe I'll ask her exactly what we did to rub her the wrong way. 
Update on the landlord situation though... she came over about half an hour ago to talk to the girls about who's going to pay for the sprinkler head. She came downstairs and talked to me after and told me that the bitchy one maintains it was Brandon who parked there, to which I was like that's impossible, it was 2 pm in the afternoon, he was at work, you can check with his boss if you want to. Landlord was like I don't believe her for a second, out of all 3 of them I like her the least. The other two girls said that they've never ever seen us park on the right side of the driveway, always the left, so they pretty much called out the third girl for lying. Landlord has told them that the far left two spots are ours, end of story. BMC wasn't too happy about that, but landlord said if I have any more issues to let her know. I feel bad for the other two girls though, because the bitchy one wouldn't fess up, landlord said she would just take it out of their group damage deposit. 

@yellowrose314 How old is this chick?  She sounds like she's 12, with all this 'No I didn't, you did it!' and 'It's not fair!' chatter.   Glad that the landlord knew it wasn't you guys and that even her roommates knew it smelled fishy and stuck up for you guys.   That really says something about a person when even your roommates don't believe you.

AnnaS930

@yellowrose314 don't feel too bad for the other 2, that's the risk you take sharing an apartment with people, shared responsibilities for damage. Hoping this doesn't start some huge drama for you though!

skirtandsandals

Apparently all my twatwaffles are coming out this month! (Or I've lost that patient feeling...) 

For the 4th, my parents had a family party at their house on the lake. My super cool aunt and uncle brought their pair of kayaks and were letting whomever wanted to use them. My husband and I went out, my first time but not his. Getting in was enough of a challenge with this belly, but I did it and we went around for about 30 minutes without me tipping over! When we came back, it was of course a time when no one was swimming or out in the other boats or floaties, so I had quiet the audience. I can't imagine getting out of a kayak that is still in the water is easy when your center of gravity hasn't recently moved up and forwards, but it wasn't easy for me! My husband was helping me, and the rest of my loving family was shouting lots of conflicting advice, in case I wasn't clear that they ALL were watching. The biggest TW of this story is my a-hole uncle, who shouts, "Don't worry, I'll got get the crane!" Luckily, I was quick enough to shout back, "Ahh! That's why you're divorced!" 


ETA: Here I am being a pregnant kayaking superstar: 

yellowrose314

@LakeR2014 Officially, she's in her early 20's, but yes, the maturity of a 12 year old. Apparently the other 2 girls are hoping she's going to move in with her boyfriend soon so they can get her the eff out of there.
No drama with my landlord, she's a lovely lady and totally on our side. I've known her since about 5 years old, and I graduated high school with her daughter. She called me today wanting to know if we were looking to move into a bigger place once the baby gets here, which we are, and offered a brand new upper suite that her and her husband built (they're real estate developers), for a crazy discounted rate (average price for a nice 2 bedroom suite/apartment where I live is about $1300/month, she offered it to us for $1050, utilities included!).

@skirtandsandals Bravo on the quick comeback. Also super impressed that you had the courage to even go kayaking. DH wants to go so bad but the thought of trying to fit my giant belly under a life jacket makes me anxious haha

vampirina

Somedays I just feel like everyone is a twatwaffle because I'm pregnant and hot and cranky and so unless you're supplying me with a steady stream of ice pops you're a twatwaffle and so there. 

I'm a real treat to be around these days. 

AnnaS930

TW Thursday is happening right now..  I sit in an office room of about 25 people, mostly in cubicles.. I have a corner desk and face the walls.  I can hear a coworker clipping their fingernails somewhere in the room behind me. I keep shooting death stares behind me, but don't know who it is - I've seen a few workers do this during the work day, so my suspects are a handful of people. It's disgusting!  No one wants to hear that *clip clip clip* sound.  I can understand needing to trim a painful hangnail during the day.. but do it in the bathroom.  This person is clearly doing all of both hands as it has been going on for a ridiculous amount of time. If there's any possibility that they are also clipping their toenails I will honestly vomit and go home.

LakeR2014

@AnnaS930 Nope, Nope, Nope!  This is disgusting!  Who really things taking care of personal hygiene at your desk is an OK thing to do?  Where's the etiquette and sense of personal boundaries!?  And OMG if they're clipping the toenails, book it from there, call HR from home and say you had to leave due to an unhygienic work environment, will be working from home and will NOT be taking any PTO for the time you're gone.   I mean EWW!

yellowrose314

@AnnaS930 Ewwwwwwwwwww. People are gross. I can't handle the sound, let alone having someone close to me clipping their fingernails or toenails; even when I wasn't pregnant it made me want to vomit. I make DH do it in the shower, and he kindly makes sure that all the clippings are down the drain... he did them in the living room once and I stepped on one and I shit you not it lodged in my foot and made me bleed like a stuck pig. I doused my foot in half a bottle of rubbing alcohol because I was convinced I was going to get gangrene or necrotizing fasciatis or something... *vomits in mouth* excuse me...

AnnaS930

@yellowrose314 - I hate the sound as well. I don't mind doing my little guys because awwww, cute little tiny baby nails.. but my husband knows to do his with his foot on the toilet so all clippings go down the drain. YUCK

AmMcc12

The guy that sits in the cube next to me clips his nails weekly. I am just waiting for one to fly over the cube wall 

LakeR2014

Who are these nail clipper people?!? Have they no couth?

mrsvoorhees-2

So today, Crinkle Cut was talking about her wedding and saying that now she's thinking 11-5-16 because 11+5=16, so fun date. Then she threw out another date that was a little later, but then said, "oh, no, never mind, I don't want it to be all double digits." 

What.  

camichael84

MrsVoorhees said:

So today, Crinkle Cut was talking about her wedding and saying that now she's thinking 11-5-16 because 11+5=16, so fun date. Then she threw out another date that was a little later, but then said, "oh, no, never mind, I don't want it to be all double digits." 

What.  

Seriously. What??? How are these important factors in picking a wedding date?

But at least she seems to be realizing she's not going to be getting married in 3 months. 

mrsvoorhees-2

@camichael84 oh no, she still wants to get married in October but just mentioned that that was a fun date. I told her that dates like that are usually booked early. Like how you're supposed to plan a wedding.

ruemcclanahan

@MrsVoorhees I don't understand. Invitations should be ordered soon lol how does she think that this is happening? 
Or is she not actually serious??

yellowrose314

@MrsVoorhees At this point I want to meet her so I can just stare at her in fascination. 

mrsvoorhees-2

@Megan324 oh no, she's very, very serious. Almost everything else in her life has worked out perfectly on its own, so she just assumes everything will. She also doesn't realize that no, I'm not helping throw your engagement party, (which she has already chosen the venue she would like) and no, I'm not throwing you a shower. Because I don't have time, I don't feel like being stressed over getting it planned and booked and done and invited right before I have a baby just because you had to get married asap, and I don't feel like spending the money on it when we are about to drop 3 grand on a hospital bill. Sorry, not sorry. This is what you chose. 

@yellowrose314 It would take you a little while after meeting her to realize it, I think, because on the outside, she's very normal. And will talk about normal
thjngs. But when you're friends with her, all of her craziness comes out and you learn how self absorbed she is.

yellowrose314

@MrsVoorhees Don't care, the knowledge I know already would be enough for me to stare at her in rapt fascination. I would even bring popcorn. 

mrsvoorhees-2

New story, get your popcorn.

We just found out a friend of ours at work is 9 weeks pregnant, so, so excited for her. She just got married in Feb and started trying pretty quickly and got pregnant really quickly. So her due date is Feb 6th and her first anniversary is Feb 10th. Reminder: Crinkle Cut's birthday is right after
christmas and the day after her moms. She has serious issues with this. So
she tells our friend, "you better hope
you have that baby early because she will hate you forever if you have her on your anniversary." At this point, I've heard it too much and couldn't hold back, and asked, "why the hell
would that matter to any normal person?" And she said that she wI'll hate having to share the day, and I don't know what it's like to have to share every birthday and she never gets to have her own day because it's always shared with her mom and more self absorbed psycho babble. I told
her that I know many, many peiple
who have shared birthdays and have never bitched about it like she has. And that normal adults don't expect to
be the center of attention on their birthday like her. 

She is infuriating. And I can never make my point because she always just says, "you don't understand, you have your own birthday." She gets so, so mad any time anything like that is mentioned. Makes me want to scream and say really mean things that would probably get me in deep trouble at work.

OBMommy

@mrsvoorhees I knew there was a reason I checked in today! Thanks for not disappointing 

AnnaS930

@MrsVoorhees - my sister was born on my parents' 5th anniversary. Let me tell you - it didn't bother her one bit, if anyone got short-changed on the deal it was probably my parents because the focus became my sister instead of going out on a kid-free date night of their own.

Even I benefited as the younger child, since the 3 of them had something to celebrate I used to get a small present from my grandmother on that day too!  Woop woop!  (And people wonder why I'm nearing 30 and still gift-grabby!!)

camichael84

@MrsVoorhees I am so glad you said something to her about normal adults! My grandma, uncle, and cousins (said uncles children) have birthdays of Sept 21, 23, and 25 (two are on the 23rd). I have never heard any of them make this complaint. I have a good friend that is a twin. Far from hearing her complain about this, she loves sharing her birthday with her twin. And like Anna said, I would think with it being close to an anniversary (and not another birthday or major holiday), the only one missing out on anything would be the adults. I hope the co-worker knows her well enough to know she's spouting crap, and that Crinkle Cut didn't dampen her exciting news.

I also wish I could meet her or somehow view her in action on TV.

AnnaS930

Just overheard in my office by pregnant coworker:
"My OB keeps weighing me wrong! She said I had gained 26 pounds... uhhhh, NO!!  You're recording it wrong!"
coworker's reply "That would be a BIG ASS BABY!"

Pregnant coworker is 5 weeks behind me, so 26 weeks. At 26 weeks I had, in truth - by no miscalculation of weight - gained over 20 pounds.  Glad to know I'm growing a big ass baby.  Womp womp.

LakeR2014

@MrsVoorhees As someone who's birthday is the day after her dad's I call BS on Crinkle!   She can take that to her 'you don't understand' mentality.  I fully understand and LOVE having a birthday so close with my dad.   I felt bad for him when I was younger, because I felt that he was short changed, but since getting older it's always been another bond we've had.   All of our pictures show us with a joint cake smiling and I LOVE it!  Plus, I mean really, at her age, she needs to have a separate day from her mom?   At this point, with my dad's being so close to me only family knows.   My friends get together for a birthday celebration and it's only about Me.   Not because I want it that way, but because ya know, I'm in my 30s and that's what you do.   You have separate lives from your parents.