Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss

I guess I belong here now. 2nd tri loss intro

Hi, ladies. If it's okay, I'm going to go ahead and join you today. On Wednesday we went to the peri to have some testing done to diagnose a Trisomy 21 diagnosis and found that our son had already passed. Despite bracing for bad news later down the line, we were shocked and dumbfounded that he was already gone. 

We had to have a D&E done but due to the political climate around here, none of the local hospitals work with the doctors that perform them. I was referred by my perinatologist to a clinic and upon arrival found it was an abortion clinic. I had to sign all kinds of state-mandated forms consenting to the termination of my son even though he was already deceased. It was a nightmare on top of a nightmare. The procedure itself went well and now I'm home trying to rest and figure out how in the world I'm supposed to get up and go face the world again. All I want is to be pregnant with my son again. I look down at my now flat belly and I can't stop crying.

I'm sorry from the bottom of my heart for everything that has brought all of us here together and hope I'm able to provide some support to everyone else who is hurting.
Me: 38 l DH: 41
Gavin - 8/27/10
Gabriel - 2nd tri loss 5/17/16 Trisomy 18 & 21
Hope -  2nd tri loss 12/7/16 complications from pneumonia

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Re: I guess I belong here now. 2nd tri loss intro

  • @thatlauragirl I am so, so sorry for your loss and that you need to join the board. However, we are happy to have you and hope you find it to be as supportive and comforting as I have. 
  • RiverSong15RiverSong15 member
    edited May 2016
    I'm so incredibly sorry for your loss, and I'm angry on your behalf that politics has made this heartbreaking loss even harder. I'm so sorry. Hugs.

    ETA: I went and read your posts on N16. I'm so sorry you had to deal with insensitive comments from others about an intensely personal and agonizing situation. I thought your post was articulate and tactful. That's more than some deserved. Hugs.
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  • chloe97chloe97 member
    edited May 2016
    Hi @thatlauragirl I am so so sorry to see you here. I was in November 16 with you and I had a similar story to yours. I found out 10 days ago that my baby had Triploidy after a CVS bc my NIPT failed twice and though we had made plans to terminate at 13 weeks, we found out that the baby passed before the D&E on Monday. This has been the most heartbreaking month of my life. I hate hate hate that politics get involved at all in the care of women in our situations. I'm lucky that I live in a state with fewer restrictions end my insurance covers abortion services or my D&E would have also been scheduled at an abortion clinic despite the terminal diagnosis.

    Im not sure when this gets better. I'm also having a bad day today. Just know we are here to listen to you whenever you need it. Sending so many hugs!

    ETA I just read your post in N'16. Thank you so much for writing what you did about the reality of of T-21 diagnosis. That needed to be said and you said it perfectly. 
  • GlitterGlitter member
    Im so sorry your here, but it is such a great place. Its been so helpful for me.

    Im sorry that you had to go through even more issues, I didnt know that hospitals wont do d&e. I guess its an area thing. Mine does them and offers prayers, burials, and support. I hate that you had to go through the extra heartache. But you seem to have done well. Its a sad time and takes everyone different amounts to heal both physically and emotionally. We are all here for you, just pm if you ever just want to chat. Hugs your way.
  • lin0442lin0442 member
    I read your post in Nov 16. I just want to say again that I'm so sorry for what you're going through and the injustice you had to face. Hugs. 
  • fioripfiorip member
    I am so sorry you are going through this, I cannot fathom your pain, you are so strong. I pray you find peace. Hugs. 
    I'm 29, husband is 30
    Together since 2006
    Married 01.17.15  <3

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  • There aren't even enough words for me to express how deeply sorry I am for your loss. There are so many amazing women on here who will listen and help you. I turned here a month when my baby's heart stopped, and I'm so thankful that I did. This is a place to express your ideas and thoughts-we are here for you. I am praying for you and everyone else. Lots of hugs being sent ❤️ 
  • I am so so sorry for your loss.  
    About me:
    /loss mentioned/
    TTC#1 July 2014
    dx: MFI (morphology)
    IUI #1 w/Clomid + Ovidrel Sept. 2015 ~ BFN
    IUI #2 w/Clomid + Ovidrel Halloween 2015 ~ BFN
    IUI #3 w/Clomid + Ovidrel Thanksgiving 2015 ~ BFP!!
    hb 146 bpm at 7w5d
    1/28/16 ~ began to say goodbye to our beautiful baby at 11w 
    d&c, followed by cytotec
    TTCAL April 2016
    IUI #4 w/Clomid + Ovidrel Apr. 2016 ~ BFN
    IUI #5 w/Clomid + Ovidrel ~ CP
    IUI#6 w/Clomid + Ovidrel ~ BFN
  • I am sorry for your loss. :(
  • I am so sorry for the loss of your son and all that you have gone through. This board has been an incredible source of support for me and I hope you can find some comfort here while going through your grief process. Sending you hugs and peace during this difficult time. 
     ****TW: Pregnancy, loss and children mentioned****
    Me (39) DH (40) 
    From my first marriage DD: 03/04 CP:01/06 DS:12/06 
    DH- no kids
    TTC: since 2/15, RE Consult 9/15
    IUI #1 10/15: Letrozole = BFN 
    IUI #2 11/15: Letrozole + trigger = BFN
    1/08/16: Surprise- BFP!!  2/16/16: MMC @10w 2days,  D&C: 2/17/16
    TTCAL: May 2016
    IUI #3 5/27/16: Letrozole+trigger=BFN
    IUI #4 06/24/16: 7.5mg Letrozole+trigger= BFN
    IUI#5 08/24/16 Menopur+trigger = BFN
    IUI #6 09/19/16 5 mg Letrozole +Menopur + Trigger= BFN
    **10/2016: No more medicated cycles, TTCAL on our own**
    12/03/16: BFP!! EDD: 08/12/17 It's a girl!! 
    Eleni was born on 8/14/17!!
  • I'm so so sorry @thatlauragirl and I'm sorry for the difficulties you encountered getting your procedure taken care of. I'm so heartbroken for you. Sending you big hugs.
  • I'm so so sorry for your loss. After our d&E, we had our baby girl cremated and when we were making arrangements at the funeral home, picking out her urn and doing paperwork we were given a copy of the letter from the hospital to them stating why our baby was deceased, I was heartbroken that the medical terminology had to say "abortion,"such a harsh word when I wanted nothing more in this world then to have my daughter. I'm sorry that rather then caring for you at such a traumatic time, based on politics, you were sent away to a abortion clinic. Prayers for your family and your Angel coming your way!
    Married August 2012
    Me:28 DH:31
    Diagnosed with Diminished Ovarian Reserve March 2015
    IUI # 1 May 2015 - BFN
    December 2015 - Natural BFP - Our Angel baby Mila Grace went to heaven @ 21 weeks on 4/21/16 (D&E) due to Triploidy
    Currently waiting to start TTAL
  • Thanks for the support, everyone. @chloe97 and @lin0442 I am so so sorry to see you here too. I feel like we should still be on the Nov. board and this isn't real. Sending big virtual hugs to everyone. 
    Me: 38 l DH: 41
    Gavin - 8/27/10
    Gabriel - 2nd tri loss 5/17/16 Trisomy 18 & 21
    Hope -  2nd tri loss 12/7/16 complications from pneumonia

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