CIO before or after travel? — The Bump
June 2015 Moms

CIO before or after travel?

Sorry this is a long one.... Bit of a loaded question. Tried to be quick and to the point. Also asked on the 9-12 month board.

Quick background - baby is 10 months and has been a great sleeper up until this point. Overall I think she's at some sort of developmental leap and/or over tired. 

The issue - The last week she has consistantly gone to bed at 8:00 pm which is part of her routine and normal, but wakes up at 10:00 pm crying. We did have a bad diaper rash the last week as well so I would take the opportunity to get a dry diaper on her. Diaper rash is healed, and other than waking up, she's fine and should have no issue sleeping at this point. We dabbled with CIO but my husband and I didn't go into it with a solid plan. However, what we saw was she would become more and more hysterical each time we would go in (3, 5 and 10 minute intervals) that she was shaking and couldn't settle. 

The question - Once she has reached that point of hysterical crying, do we continue to go in and leave her crying as she was? Do we stay until she's settled down? If not - that would mean we are in there for atleast 30 minutes - easy. 

Finally - we have a trip with a three hour flight next week. Should attempt CIO this week, only to have her schedule/environment disrupted next week or hold off?

Re: CIO before or after travel?

  • I have a terrible sleeper so am in no position to give advice. But part of my problem is that I've heard you need 2-3 weeks of consistency for sleep training (not that it takes that long - just to really set the routine after the training). We travel about that often, so we will dabble in CIO or another method, and then the routine is broken and we can't make it stick. 

    My suggestion, as a total sleep flunkee, would be to wait til after travel, if you can then offer 2-3 consistent weeks after that.

    Re: your other questions, I'm curious about the answer. My kid isn't learning to self-soothe either, and also gets increasingly hysterical. I wind up holding him after he's shaking crying, until he's almost asleep, then putting him back in his crib. He knows he's back in his crib, but is not really gaining the self-soothing skills I would like to be teaching him.

  • I would also suggest just waiting until after travel to sleep train, assuming you can then dedicate a couple/few weeks to helping your LO self soothe and put themselves to sleep.

    When I read about the Feber Method (Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems) it said you only want to soothe for 1-2 minutes (don't pick them up, just rub/pat their back, etc), then walk out when they are still awake.  So going by that method, I wouldn't stay until they are quieted as that would seem to defeat the purpose of helping them soothe themselves.  My LO also gets more riled up when we go to check/soothe her for 1-2 minutes, and I believe the book did address that, but I don't recall what it said.  I think it said you can consider postponing when you soothe if you think it would just upset your LO more.

    Of course you want to do what you feel comfortable with.  I'd just say whatever you do decide, try to have a solid plan going in and try for at least a full week so you're not giving up too early.  At least for me, having a solid plan helped me feel better about what we were doing.
  • I agree on waiting due to travel. The more I thought about it.... She's going to be off anyway next week.

    Her sleep did improve over the weekend. This may not be the ideal situation but if and when she fully wakes in the middle of the mighty - she seems to settle much quicker if we stay in the room. We are not pulling her out of the crib but hanging out in the glider till she's calm and laid down to go to sleep. It's working for now. 

    I found symptoms for a developmental leap that happens about week 44 (The Wonder Weeks) and she is the poster child for leap 7. 

    Also found that when she does "wake", even if she is crying (she's not initially hysterical, unless we go in there), we don't go in her room. Most nights she did this - she went back to sleep.

    Ive also found that she is sleeping in a bit longer. Over the weekend she was making it to 8:00 am, which is when we do her morning bottle. Monday and Tuesday, we've had to wake her to get her to grandma's at 6:30.

    Hopefully the resolve is us just waiting out that initial cry/"wake up".

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