Nighttime still sucks........

klkonwi

Starting a new thread because.....

klkonwi

Up at 2am......... Ugh.
I think my LO is teething or it's the leap. He keeps pulling away from the bottle and whining/crying and I can't console him easily at all.
I kind of feel like a big old failure at momming' right now.

klkonwi

This is me lately.........

upandbelow

klkonwi said:

Up at 2am......... Ugh.
I think my LO is teething or it's the leap. He keeps pulling away from the bottle and whining/crying and I can't console him easily at all.
I kind of feel like a big old failure at momming' right now.

I can relate, my normally happy baby has been sad so much more lately. She was born July 3rd, so behind most of you ladies, so I'm not sure what it is, but I feel terrible because all my tricks fail and I find myself just rocking her and apologizing because I don't know what to do

virginiaunicorn11

@klkonwi Babies be babies. Are you loving him, caring about him, offering everything you think he needs? Then you're a rockin' mama and the word "fail" belongs nowhere near you. I'm sorry he's being difficult for you lately.

ETA you too, @upandbelow But I've been in the "just apologizing to baby" spot. It feels awful, but again, babies be babies. If you're trying, you're doing a good job.

krystleshel

We were by the oven fan for 30 min last night. I feel you.

virginiaunicorn11

Am also feeling like a failure. Not only is LO (16 weeks) waking several times a night still, but he's been waking up still yawning lately. We have our next pediatrician's visit on the 12th, after we drive/move to our Midwest hometown, but they don't know LO yet. Going to turn to Dr. Google now. "Infant wakes still tired."

Can't decide if it's just who this baby is, or if I need to do something different to help him (me?!) sleep. He seems actively hungry each time he wakes, and other comfort doesn't seem to work, but admittedly I don't try very hard. If I'm honest, it's because
a) I have a belief, true or not, that on-demand everything provides what he needs;
b) nursing is easy because he eats and goes back to sleep in like 10 minutes or less; and
c) our life is sooo hectic right now, and will be until the 8th, that I truly cannot get LO into a routine. I don't want to hear that's what he needs because then it means I'm a bad mom for now.

He's a joy during the day, and doesn't really even cry at night. Just wakes and makes hungry sounds.

TL;DR sleep deprivation and moving are a bad combo with an infant

ChardeeMacDennis

@virginiaunicorn11 I don't have any good advice, but my second son was a lot like that. He woke several times a night wanting to eat (which does not always mean actual hunger). It didn't get any better until I completely quit night nursing and sleep trained around one year.

My advice would be to get your husband to take over putting the baby back to sleep unless it's been 3-4 hours since he ate. My baby would only take milk from me to go to sleep but my husband eventually figured out other techniques. It might work better if baby is in his own room so he can't see or smell you.

virginiaunicorn11

@ChardeeMacDennis thanks, that's a good tip. It is probably going to cause a few fights but I think you're right.
If LO doesn't really cry, should we wait til he actually cries, or is going in when he's whining ok?
I hate to let/make him cry, and know he's not old enough to have "bad habits" yet.

lwhrmomma

@virginiaunicorn11  We're in the middle of the 4 month sleep regression, and LO has been waking up every hour or two whimpering.  I haven't been feeding him at night unless he is absolutely screaming.  Usually he is able to fall back asleep within 5-10 minutes.  I hate letting him "cry", but seeing that he is falling back asleep assures me that he is okay.  I don't let him cry for 10 minutes straight--I'll go in after 5 and rub his back until he calms down.  Sometimes he starts crying again, but usually only for a minute or two until he falls asleep again.  We did this for a few nights, and it seems to be working?  Last night he actually slept again from 9-5:30.  He woke up "crying", but fell asleep again until just now (8:30).  

I agree that @chardeemacdennis had great advice by having your hubby put LO back to sleep sometimes.  I think our babies are starting to get smarter and associate mommy with milk, so daddy may have a much easier time than us.  

With everything you have on your plate right now, I am amazed and impressed at what a great mommy you are.  Maybe LO is waking up frequently at night because he remembers how much fun he has with you during the day, and wants more of that.  

KaLikeAWind

@virginiaunicorn11 I also will wait when LO starts to stir and make some noises overnight. Since he is still in the pnp next to the bed on my side, I have actually watched him partially or mostly wake, move around and grumble and make some noise, then suddenly just fall back asleep. Sometimes if its taking him a little longer to go back out I might pop his 'snooze button' (his paci) in. If he is truly ready to wake up, he'll spit that out and just keep going, but if not he'll relax with that and fall back asleep. I mean, its almost a given that every morning around 5am he wakes up a bit and starts to stir. Its enough to wake me up, anyway. I used to just go ahead and get up thinking he was up for the day since he had slept for so long. But I started to see what would happen if I waited, and it turned out he would hold off actually waking until around 7am. Some days he is more 'active' during this awake/asleep time between 5-7am - 'waking' more often and making more noise - and sometimes he only 'wakes' maybe 3 times or less. Even when we get up for the day he usually isn't at the outright crying stage when I get up, but I can tell when he's done 'snoozing' and is officially up. However, it took me quite a few sleepless mornings between 5-7am to be able to differentiate between when he was likely to wake up for good or might go back to sleep.

You're doing a great job. You've got so much going on right now. I'm actually a bit in awe of you and your DH juggling all of this while dealing with a baby. Hats off to you, gal.

YouAreMySunshine15

LO is so messed up right now with sleep. I don't know if it's my fault for trying to force the crib, leap 4, or an early sleep regression. After a week of fighting sleep at bedtime, she finally fell asleep right away last night and slept 7 hours straight in her own room. It was in the RNP but right next to her crib. I really needed that. It's taken 3 hours of standing and bouncing every night to get her down for the last week. My legs and back are killing me. Side note and DH rave: he surprised me with an awesome new baby monitor yesterday and we used it last night. So cool and worth the $$!

delujm0

LO rarely cries when she wakes up because we hear her making noise before she gets to that point.  I have seen her on my video monitor recently be completely awake at 2am, roll around for about 10 minutes babbling, find her thumb, and put herself back to sleep.  Generally if she's actually hungry she will be fussy and unimpressed, so we will go in and feed her.  But if she's content in there and settles down in 10-15 minutes, we let her be.

 

When she wakes up in the morning she rarely cries, but it's so funny...she will look up at her mobile and smile at it and start talking to the animals.  So when we go in there, she's all wide eyed smiles and babbling, and it's super cute.  And then about 20 minutes later she remembers that it's been several hours since her last meal and she starts yelling for food.  I'm always super jealous that DH has LO for the morning shift.  She's so happy in the morning.  By the time I pick her up from daycare, she is tired and cranky and after about an hour I just give up on trying to force her to play with me and put her to sleep.  I can't wait for the weekend.

 

LO is 14 weeks and she has slept through the night now three nights in a row...I am alternating between being super excited and being terrified that she's just going to do this until I'm comfortable enough to expect it, and then have her 4 month sleep regression and it's just going to be SO SO BAD since I'm used to having it so so good right now.  She was SUCH a cranky baby for 3 months, it was miserable, and she's been sleeping so well lately, I'm going to be so sad if that gets taken away from me.  I would like to take a time machine to the day after that sleep regression ends and call it a day.

cbrtncanadian

Our babe will wake several times but not actually need to eat, typically I put the soother back in say back to sleep sweetie and then leave the room for a bathroom break or to grab a snack or drink. By the time I come back he is usually asleep again and I resume sleeping. If he really needs to get up he will start to get louder and possibly cry when I do this routine.

However if I just stay in the room he will typically not go back to sleep and we will end up getting up and feeding before he is able to go back to bed.

Maybe this would also work for you?

lovethatcolosun

LO is still not STTN, which honestly I've expected. DS didn't start that until 8 mo. She's cut down on the length of her feeds though so fingers crossed we're getting closer to that point. She's 14 weeks.

LO has also been more fussy the last couple of days, not sure exactly why yet. A random thing that I have found that works to settle her is to put her in the breast feeding position in my arms with boob out and walk around for a little bit. She eventually latches and calms down so I can sit down and nurse her. It's something about the standing and walking, because I've tried to trick her with mimicing movements while seated and she still screams. I stand up and take two steps and she latches. It's weird, but it works.

virginiaunicorn11

^ I do this, too. And there is NO fooling LO. Homey KNOWS when you're walking and when you're faking. He says ain't nobody got time for the fake crap. That's scream-worthy. ("How could you, Mama?!")

KaLikeAWind

I am SO looking forward to getting my video monitor tomorrow. Once again LO has fallen asleep next to me on the couch while I ate dinner. Now I know new bedtime is around 7-8pm. I consdiered right now putting him to bed in his crib (for the first time), until I realized that I would totally bug out not being able to see him. Hopefully a video feed will give me the gumption to make the plunge!

lovethatcolosun

@mellymar I was so hesitant to move DS at three months old, but I bit the bullet and just did it. He slept so much better, as did I. With LO I moved her at 6 weeks. I repeated all the same emotions and she did great. Give it a go girl!!

YouAreMySunshine15

lovethatcolosun said:

@mellymar I was so hesitant to move DS at three months old, but I bit the bullet and just did it. He slept so much better, as did I. With LO I moved her at 6 weeks. I repeated all the same emotions and she did great. Give it a go girl!!

Did you do anything special, or just put them in?

slr1229

14 week baby over here, please just wake up once tonight I-)

lovethatcolosun

Sjeff0816 said:

lovethatcolosun said:

@mellymar I was so hesitant to move DS at three months old, but I bit the bullet and just did it. He slept so much better, as did I. With LO I moved her at 6 weeks. I repeated all the same emotions and she did great. Give it a go girl!!

Did you do anything special, or just put them in?

I did my routine of jammies, nursing, white noise and swaddle in the nursery and then set them in the crib milk drunk and sleepy. Like I said before, I was the one with all the hyped up feelings and anxieties of what ifs. All it took was one good nights sleep "away" from them to get over that.

jessieR358

Well the zipadee zip is a big fail over here. Waking up just as many times...which is every 45 minutes to an hour the past 3 weeks. Something has to give. I'm exhausted and worn down with no sleep.
He's still in his Pnp bassinet in our room. I'm tempted to put him in his crib bc he keeps hitting the sides of the bassinet but I don't know if that will make a difference. I'm not letting him CIO but letting him fuss/whine for 5-10 minutes before getting him. The second I pick him up eyes are closed and he's out. Then repeat the process again when I put him back down. Thoughts? Advice? He'll be 12 weeks tomorrow. He was only waking up 2x a night until we went on vacation and it's been AWFUL since then.

dancegurl1118

LO has been waking up in the middle of the night but unless she's crying I ignore it. She goes back to bed. That was originally our problem with her in our bedroom, as soon as she stirred I would feed her.

jessieR358

I just got an almost 4 hour stretch with the zipadee zip! Holy cow.

Sammy K

LO was up every 2.5 hours last night. I'm so jealous of those who are STTN.

I don't know what I would do without coffee.

virginiaunicorn11

Last night before bed, I got DH on board with your suggestions. Then I only fed LO if it had been at least two hours since he last ate - which meant my patting him and turning on white noise on two occasions, DH picking him up on one occasion, and me nursing him twice. (Yes, LO woke at 11:00, 1:00, 1:30, 3:30 and 6:00. I fed him at 9:30 pm, 1:00 and 6:00.)

This was admittedly less restful for me (and DH) than just feeding him all five times... but I feel good about already starting on a path that hopefully gets us toward learning to sleep longer intervals. And I also feel good that this doesn't mean making him/letting him cry.

Thanks so much for your suggestions, ladies!! @ChardeeMacDennis @kristenk727 @mellymar @christinabrtn @delujm0

(And actually, this made me realize I am over-responding to LO more generally. Sounds are not the same as crying. I'm going to let him whine it out a little more often, more generally. FTM here, learning to chillllll!)

delujm0

Our STTN streak ended at 3.  Last night LO woke up at 2:45 for a snack and was still asleep when I left the house at 6:45 this morning.

 

I love when she sleeps through the night, which is typically 7pm-6am, because while I usually have to wake up around 2 to pump to stay comfortable, I actually get to SLEEP until my alarm goes off at 5.  DH prefers it when she has a MOTN feed because he's on morning duty and usually if she eats between 3-4 she will sleep until at least 7.  So he'll get up when she wakes MOTN and change her but then hand her off to me and pass back out.  When I left today and they were BOTH still sleeping, and I had been up since 2:45 (because when I got back in bed at 3:45, DH WOULD NOT STOP SNORING) I wanted to "accidentally" do something terribly loud in the bedroom, I was so jealous of DH.  Also, my asshole cat decided this would be a fun morning to poop on the floor right in front of me, two feet from his clean litter box.  Happy Friday!  I'm unsure of what I did to offend him today, but he's about three seconds from being locked outside in the hurricane.  Ugh.

Eta: just heard from dh, LO slept until 8 today. Now I really hate him. So much.

mlindzz

@delujm0 my husband would keep me awake when he snores to, luckily with a little push or kick, he rolls over and usually stops. Maybe try getting him to change positions?

@upandbelow I can relate, all of the tricks I had that use to put our babe down quickly for naps he now only protests against.

@sammyk my LO is 15 weeks on a Sunday and still feeds every 2 hours as well, day AND night. Although luckily he's usually a deep sleeper so there it isn't much work to put him back to sleep, he barely even wakes most of the time. Lately he's been up between feedings though after I'm not getting all of his burps up. So that splits up my 1.5 hours sleep between feedings.

Last night sucked. I wear a fitbit to bed, it tells me I slept under 3 hours between midnight and 7 am last night. Luckily my DH works from home so on days like this he'll take LO for an hour or two so I can go back to sleep.

On a bright note, my LO started laughing yesterday. Like throw his head back, deep belly laughing. It's about the best thing in the while world. XD

theletlers

@jesshrou sorry momma! I feel your pain. My LO typically eats about 1.5-2 hours day and night too. I'll prob jinx it now, but for the last 5 or 6 nights gone for a 3.5-4 hour stretch when he first goes down for the night before resuming to his 2 hour schedule. The first night I slept for three hours in a row I felt like a whole new mommy!

Hope all the mommies get a good night tonight!!! Lots of T&Ps for you all!! Sleep well babies!!

klkonwi

I'm on call for work tonight and just praying I don't get called in due to the fact that I stayed up cleaning, making/washing bottles, laundry for whole family, and pumping...... When I should of been trying to sleep... I'm so dumb sometimes but really who is going to do it!!?!? Lol

I spilled 4 oz of bm this morning I was so tired when I got off work and thanks to my mother in law I have to use 3 freezer bags in the next 24 hrs of bm because she just didn't put the bags in the freezer today........... DH swears he told her to .... Ugh.

klkonwi

Oh yeah........ To get to the point of this thread....... My babe loves to sleep through the night for DH when I'm gone at work .... It sorta pisses me off! Come on kiddo please do that for me at some point!!!!

virginiaunicorn11

Well, guess who has been sleeping since 8 pm and now it's 1:40 am? And guess who is NOT sleeping because she's been (back at the hotel) fighting with her husband for three hours, because he thinks going to a wedding was irresponsible and disruptive to LO!

No, really, DH. If the kid has his first 5+ hour sleep in over a month, it's time to admit you are just wrong - the wedding is not this terrible thing that is harming your baby. Jeebus.

klkonwi

@virginiaunicorn11 Ugh! Sorry lady! Men........ :-?

dancegurl1118

@virginiaunicorn11 if that's what it took for your LO to sleep you better start finding weddings to go to all the time!!!

dancegurl1118

LO just woke up screaming at the top of her lungs. Lady, don't you realize mama had one too many drinks when she went out last night?

klkonwi

I can't sleep........ Bah. Stupid being on call....
Can't relax enough to sleep!!! I get why my parents were obsessed with sleep growing up. It's legit.

theletlers

Well I went to bed at midnight. LO was actually asleep at 10:15. He got up to eat about 15 minutes after I fell asleep. Then again at 2:15, 4 and 5:30. Guess who has woken up too many times to fall back asleep...I wish I could get laundry and vacuuming done now but the washing machine is right outside where we sleep and I think it would wake him up. Same with the vacuum because the dogs bark like crazy at that thing. Grrrrr.
Side note, I think DH snoring bothers me more now than before baby. Pretty sure it's because I want to sleep deep enough to snore but haven't in so long. Probably since I was about 6 months pregnant.
I miss sleep....

lovethatcolosun

Both kids were asleep by 9:30. DH asks, "so what should we do since both kids are sleeping?"
Me: "uh, sleep?!" I asked him how many times HE got up last night.
Him: "3."
Me: "did you wake up three times or GET up three times?"
Him: "oh...ah...woke up."
Yeah, I thought so. I actually got up four times to put both kids back to bed! I'm going to sleep now. This will be the third time I've gotten up tonight, so I feel no guilt about turning him down. I wish I could join the STTN club. 8->

delujm0

LO went to sleep at 730, woke up at 1 to eat, and then got up for the day at 745. I had to pump at 5 bc that's when I get up for work during the week, so my boobs were ready to go. Buy this is the most sleep I've gotten in ages. I was in bed and asleep by 1030.

We did see lo wake up on at least 3 occasions on the video monitor and put herself back to sleep after thrashing around for about 10 minutes. Super happy she seems to know that she only needs to wake us up if she's hungry. At 1 we heard her loudly babbling to her mobile...she wasn't even crying. But she was super hungry when I fed her.

Good night! Hopefully that 4 month sleep regression will just pass us by in a few weeks? Doubtful, but a girl can dream!

aj1327

My LO has slept from 9-5 the past 2 nights and then if I put him in bed with us he'll sleep another hour or 2. Soaking it in because when we move him to the crib next week, this isn't going to be the case. My DH will not fully back me on moving this kid to his own room. Sweet that he wants him near by, but seriously!?! I need some support here. LO will also be four months next week. Not looking forward to this sleep regression.

KaLikeAWind

@virginiaunicorn11 seriously? Your DH is going to argue with what you did for the day while your kid is sleeping the longest stretch I've ever seen you mention? Oh hell no. Shut it, DH. And furthermore, how dare you argue while I (you) could be sleeping right now!!!!!