At this point, I am not impressed by ANY of the presidential candidates. But I would vote in a heartbeat for whoever wants to make a change. Sad, I have watched 2 republican debates (I am a repub) and not one of the 16 hopefuls has even muttered the words "maternity leave". #IammovingtoCanada
im canadian we sure have our benefits but we got our issues too
im very sorry this is happening to you guys, while im not in the same situation mine i slightly similar in the money department
as i said i am canadian, well my husband is american and military so..i had to move to america because his career was not a just up and leave one, where mine i can go anywhere
but because my dual citizenship isnt all done yet, i cant work..so i feel really bad for hubby as hes the only working person in our household
Here in Germany, I get 6 weeks before and 8 weeks after delivery at full pay. After that, I can split 12 months at 65 or 70 (something like that) percent of pay between me and my husband. There's also extensions if you work part-time. We'll probably do something like me taking 8 months and then me going back full time while he does a year of flexible part-time work.
We pay for that through a lot of taxes and pretty much no way to get childcare for under-12 month olds, though. So basically, you have no choice but to take at least a year off.
Here in Germany, I get 6 weeks before and 8 weeks after delivery at full pay. After that, I can split 12 months at 65 or 70 (something like that) percent of pay between me and my husband. There's also extensions if you work part-time. We'll probably do something like me taking 8 months and then me going back full time while he does a year of flexible part-time work.
We pay for that through a lot of taxes and pretty much no way to get childcare for under-12 month olds, though. So basically, you have no choice but to take at least a year off.
Interesting! So, if you don't mind me asking (since you mentioned you pay for it through taxes), are you happy with that or would you rather pay less in taxes and not have to take so much time off? Not trying to get political or anything, just curious about stuff like that.
I'm self employed, so no maternity leave for me! Luckily I do most of my work from home and it's very flexible, so I'm hoping to get back to it at least part time relatively quickly.
About paternity leave- I remember hearing about a study that found men who take longer leave (I think it was 3 months or so) actually end up being better fathers and more involved with their children throughout their child's entire life. That early bonding is so important.
Not sure if this is something any of your SO's would be interested in/able to do, but I have heard of fathers who don't get paid leave switching to part time (4 hours per day), so they are home more and can stretch it out longer. I always liked that idea, that may be what we end up doing (although my BF already has so much leave saved up its ridiculous, lol).
Decent maternity leave is one thing my company does right (at least by U.S. standards - 6 weeks fully paid, option to use PTO for full payment for another 6 weeks), probably because it's just one division of a much larger global company.
I just wanted to interject that I never realized how little time 6 weeks actually is until I had my daughter. While some new moms are ready to go back to work when their baby is 6 weeks (and that's ok), I feel like the vast majority are not. 6 week old babies are still brand new and completely helpless... And geez, so tiny! I hate that so many moms are forced to go back to work that early because they can't afford to take unpaid leave. It's a crappy system.
I already replied to this thread, but I thought I'd add info on my leave, also, as a point of context. I work for a university and will get a full semester (~15 weeks) of leave. My summers are essentially mine to do with what I wish. If you want to succeed in this field, you do research over the summer, but I'm working hard now to get balls rolling in the right direction so I will have the summer "off" as well (May EDD, obviously). I'll have to be with the baby during the summer, of course. Even if I'm somewhat behind, I can pick my work back up mid-semester, but I'll still be free from teaching and service for the summer and fall semester. Spring semester starts mid-January, and that's when I'll have to physically be back. Also, I just got tenure, so that makes things a lot easier, too.
Interesting! So, if you don't mind me asking (since you mentioned you pay for it through taxes), are you happy with that or would you rather pay less in taxes and not have to take so much time off? Not trying to get political or anything, just curious about stuff like that.
Well, theoretically, if the taxes weren't that high, I could save the money myself and take off the same amount of time, right? Or pay for a nanny with it or something. But realistically, I don't think I'd have the discipline for that, so I am glad I just get the option to have a long parental leave, even if it's not all that much of an "option" for me.
It has societal impacts as well, of course. Women who take less than a year are called bad mothers who are selfish and shouldn't have had kids in the first place pretty openly, because the financial pressure to get back to work soon just isn't there. So people don't get why any woman would want to go back to work before that year is up.
But overall, I'm okay with the system and a lot better than no leave, of course! It's just not as 100 percent positive as it often sounds to people when I explain it to them, which is why I mention this stuff.
I already replied to this thread, but I thought I'd add info on my leave, also, as a point of context. I work for a university and will get a full semester (~15 weeks) of leave. My summers are essentially mine to do with what I wish. If you want to succeed in this field, you do research over the summer, but I'm working hard now to get balls rolling in the right direction so I will have the summer "off" as well (May EDD, obviously). I'll have to be with the baby during the summer, of course. Even if I'm somewhat behind, I can pick my work back up mid-semester, but I'll still be free from teaching and service for the summer and fall semester. Spring semester starts mid-January, and that's when I'll have to physically be back. Also, I just got tenure, so that makes things a lot easier, too.
I didn't realize how bad you guys got it! Happy Canadian here.... 52 weeks paid at 80% of my salary. My work topped up to 100% for 34 weeks. I also took 3 months sick leave prior to my sons birth at 100% of my wage. I just got back to work from that mat leave. 9 weeks pregnant now and will get the same with baby #2.
I get nothing. Nada. And because we were banking on 3 months at least before medicated cycles and we randomly got pregnant on our own, I will be not be at any new job for a year.
I feel your pain. I am royally fucked and would absolutely take a few weeks paid over nothing.
Now I feel bad for bitching. Urrrgggg what a freaking joke.
Don't! It's total bullshit all around that there needs to be stress about this.
I'm self employed so I get nothing. I'll take 4 weeks and then go back slowly, but I only work part time so I'm planning on just going to 2 days. DH gets 3 weeks this time which is much better than his 5 days with my son! I can't believe we haven't evolved on this yet. Hearing about the way other countries value maternity AND paternity leave makes me so envious!
Interesting! So, if you don't mind me asking (since you mentioned you pay for it through taxes), are you happy with that or would you rather pay less in taxes and not have to take so much time off? Not trying to get political or anything, just curious about stuff like that.
Well, theoretically, if the taxes weren't that high, I could save the money myself and take off the same amount of time, right? Or pay for a nanny with it or something. But realistically, I don't think I'd have the discipline for that, so I am glad I just get the option to have a long parental leave, even if it's not all that much of an "option" for me.
It has societal impacts as well, of course. Women who take less than a year are called bad mothers who are selfish and shouldn't have had kids in the first place pretty openly, because the financial pressure to get back to work soon just isn't there. So people don't get why any woman would want to go back to work before that year is up.
But overall, I'm okay with the system and a lot better than no leave, of course! It's just not as 100 percent positive as it often sounds to people when I explain it to them, which is why I mention this stuff.
Just curious? Are you German? Because I am and I never heard anyone around me making a comment like this badmouthing working mothers... I'm pretty sure people like this exist. It's just I never in my whole entire life came across someone like that. It just comes down to what works best for your family, who cares what other people think.
Someone asked whether you'd rather pay more taxes and get leave or pay less taxes and get no leave. I found this article interesting. It calculates, based on existing programs in New Jersey and California, that providing paid maternity leave to all employees would cost each employee less than $50 a year. Frankly, I think the argument that it costs too much is bullshit.
Just curious? Are you German? Because I am and I never heard anyone around me making a comment like this badmouthing working mothers... I'm pretty sure people like this exist. It's just I never in my whole entire life came across someone like that. It just comes down to what works best for your family, who cares what other people think.
Yes, I am German. I have heard these kind of comments when I even dared to mention that women don't have to take a full year off. These kind of comments are also often directed at women who go back to working full time instead of the "expected" part time.
That said, I am curious, do you know any women who returned to work before one year was over? Especially one who returned after less than six month? I don't. In over 80 percent of heterosexual households, women take 12 months, and the dad takes the minimum of two months concurrently with the mother.
Someone asked whether you'd rather pay more taxes and get leave or pay less taxes and get no leave. I found this article interesting. It calculates, based on existing programs in New Jersey and California, that providing paid maternity leave to all employees would cost each employee less than $50 a year. Frankly, I think the argument that it costs too much is bullshit.
Someone asked whether you'd rather pay more taxes and get leave or pay less taxes and get no leave. I found this article interesting. It calculates, based on existing programs in New Jersey and California, that providing paid maternity leave to all employees would cost each employee less than $50 a year. Frankly, I think the argument that it costs too much is bullshit.
That's about six weeks of paid leave at about two thirds of wages, though - in Germany, I get a lot more, hence the comment about paying higher taxes here.
Someone asked whether you'd rather pay more taxes and get leave or pay less taxes and get no leave. I found this article interesting. It calculates, based on existing programs in New Jersey and California, that providing paid maternity leave to all employees would cost each employee less than $50 a year. Frankly, I think the argument that it costs too much is bullshit.
That's about six weeks of paid leave at about two thirds of wages, though - in Germany, I get a lot more, hence the comment about paying higher taxes here.
With DS I took 8 weeks off but had to use all my sick days and vacation. He is only 15 months old so I've been hoarding all my days in anticipation of having another baby. My boss actually commented that I need to start taking some mental health days .. I'm like,, thanks but no. LOL I will have saved 9 weeks between both sick and vacation days. I think I'll be saving money from now till then to take the whole 12 weeks off though, 3 weeks unpaid ( .
We get nothing. You can burn all your PTO and sick days, and then FMLA. If you bought short-term disability you get a % of your salary after 2 weeks. I work for a major health system and they just don't care.
At least you get paid something. I have not talked to HR yet, but from what I have read in the employee handbook, I don't think I get a thing and still have to pay for my insurance while I'm out. From what I read, maternity leave falls under FMLA. And that is pretty much all the handbook says about that other than you have to pay your insurance when you are out. I'll talk to HR later on when I get further along. I could probably get a couple weeks PTO I'm guessing since we have unlimited PTO, but I don't want to push it. Right now I guess I"m saving based on the little bit of info that I have which means I"m going to have to still pay my college loans somehow during that time, as well as a personal loan I had to take out to pay the medical bills from the miscarriage earlier this year. All that on top of groceries and stuff.
Edit: I just looked at our employee handbook again. They apparently have updated it since I looked last. I take back all of what I said above. Ours is the first two weeks is PTO and then weeks 3 through 6 is STD and supplemented with PTO and then weeks 7+ is just STD.
I will take PTO for a week and then get ST Disability at 100% pay for 5 weeks, after that I will be able to use whatever additional vacation I have accrued (won't be much because we can't roll over vacation and have to use it or lose it each year) that will cover probably a couple of days assuming I don't have the baby until the end of May. Then I will take the rest of my FMLA time unpaid. Also DH is a teacher so he won't be getting paid most of the time I'm off either (it will be great having him home with me during the summer though!). Time to start saving!
If I am just taking regular vacation and not maternity leave then I can use it whenever during the year I want to and don't have to wait until it is accrued. Since it is maternity leave I can only use what has been accrued so far. I might go back to work in mid August for a couple of weeks then take another week vacation once DH is teaching again to extend our time at home a bit, but would have to clear it with my boss. I will need to save vacation for appointments since DH doesn't really get vacation time being a teacher.
I don't have any maternity leave at my company but I was told by my HR that I qualify for short term disability. I guess 66% pay is better than nothing since FMLA isn't covered til 1 year of employment. Join the real world USA. Some of the countries we look down on for their treatment of women still provide them with ML.
Just curious? Are you German? Because I am and I never heard anyone around me making a comment like this badmouthing working mothers... I'm pretty sure people like this exist. It's just I never in my whole entire life came across someone like that. It just comes down to what works best for your family, who cares what other people think.
Yes, I am German. I have heard these kind of comments when I even dared to mention that women don't have to take a full year off. These kind of comments are also often directed at women who go back to working full time instead of the "expected" part time.
That said, I am curious, do you know any women who returned to work before one year was over? Especially one who returned after less than six month? I don't. In over 80 percent of heterosexual households, women take 12 months, and the dad takes the minimum of two months concurrently with the mother.
Interesting. Coming from the same country, I guess we experienced completely different situations. Indeed I have friends that went back to work after just a couple of month by choice also working in completely different professions (nurses, lawyers, ingeneers). I'm glad to have a choice in Germany. Rather have that than being forced to go back so early just for financial reasons. But I just never experienced negative conversations. People can be so judgemental!
OP, your leave sounds amazing to me. I work for the government (department of health to be specific) and we get no paid leave. Zero. Zip. Nothing. I have basically been stockpiling my sick and vacation time for the 2 years that I've been there, and that won't get me all that far. I'm guessing I'll have 4 weeks of sick and vacation to discharge. I had a co-worker have a baby last week and she's coming back next week- 2 weeks post partum. Hilariously (in a How Am I So Effed? kind of way) my state has a TDI program so everyone else in the state gets paid maternity leave, but state employees are excluded from the TDI mandate. Criminal.
I didn't read any responses so forgive me if I'm repeating any info. I feel the same way about the US! I have taken out long term and short term disability through my work so while I'm out for maternity leave I will have my full pay. We have to sign up for this every year and will obviously be doing this come December to cover when this LO comes. I don't know if that's an option for you but I hope this may help. I read a long time ago that Norway pays mothers full pay with leave for 1 1/2 years! WTF U.S.!
Been married since 2009. Unicornuate Uterus (yes I menstruate glitter) Several MCs DD born 2013 (our miracle "you can't have babies" baby!)
@vinerie yes however I think the other issues she's pushing for with Planned Parenthood are appalling (in my opinion) and really trump any thought for me that she should be a speaker for women.
Been married since 2009. Unicornuate Uterus (yes I menstruate glitter) Several MCs DD born 2013 (our miracle "you can't have babies" baby!)
I work at a school so I have to use my PTO and then FMLA will kick in- just in time for me to get my June, July, and August pay checks (no, seriously). My husband has about three months accrued long term leave and another month of PTO available that he's saving. We're going to try and spend the summer together with the new baby. Plus his job is really flexible- another guy just switched to half time for six months because his wife had a baby.
Not only do I not get maternity leave but DH won't be able to take time off either. I'm hoping I won't be fired for taking a couple of weeks off after the birth but we'll figure it out because we have to. I am happy for those that get PTO or actual maternity leave because that's not reality for most people and every little bit helps!
I feel fortunate to live in a community that is of the belief that it takes a village. Because of this I know we will have support in various ways and for once I won't be shy about asking for help when needed.
I do often day dream about what it must be like for people that get a substantial amount of time off and still collect their salery so they can spend time with their newborn. Kind of seem like a fairytale.
Not only do I not get maternity leave but DH won't be able to take time off either. I'm hoping I won't be fired for taking a couple of weeks off after the birth but we'll figure it out because we have to.
I am happy for those that get PTO or actual maternity leave because that's not reality for most people and every little bit helps!
I feel fortunate to live in a community that is of the belief that it takes a village. Because of this I know we will have support in various ways and for once I won't be shy about asking for help when needed.
I do often day dream about what it must be like for people that get a substantial amount of time off and still collect their salery so they can spend time with their newborn. Kind of seem like a fairytale.
Where are you from? If you are from the United States, I was under the impression that FMLA was the law and they cannot deny you even unpaid medical leave; as in you cannot lose your job for taking medical leave under FMLA. Maternity falls under medical leave. I could be wrong.
Wow let me count my blessings (I work for the Cal State University system - so basically for the state of ca). I get 30 work days off (weekends and holidays dont count) that will take me from may to the end of july. then i can tap into my own pto. And supposedly i get an additional 8 weeks at 66%.
At this point, I am not impressed by ANY of the presidential candidates. But I would vote in a heartbeat for whoever wants to make a change. Sad, I have watched 2 republican debates (I am a repub) and not one of the 16 hopefuls has even muttered the words "maternity leave". #IammovingtoCanada
Not a Republican, but Bernie Sanders wants to fight for paid maternity leave and early child care.
I agree Maternity leave is a joke here. This is why I quit my job at a top ten university. But it's not really a party line thing. Companies don't want to do it. It's not the cost, it's rather the change in acknowledging what motherhood is in this country. We as a whole are too caught up in being equal to men rather than embracing woman hood. The top execs don't want to lose any profits. Also don't buy any criminal candidates like Hillary in their stands. It's one thing to run on platform ideas than to reform a country's thinking. Yes, love Canada's system and other countries but they have limited ultrasounds and long waits since everyone has coverage. It's obviously better than ours, but there's negatives to their system if you have a disease that you must see a doctor past a quota past 10 entitled appointments.
I don't get any pay while on maternity leave because I work for a non-profit. I'm saving up my PTO and we are saving every penny to have money for the 8-10 weeks I plan on being out. I may move to Sweden before the baby is born you get 14 months paid leave there!
Wow you get paid!!! We don't get paid at all. The only way I get money during maternity leave is paying into disability, which is not a whole paycheck but kinda close.
Not only do I not get maternity leave but DH won't be able to take time off either. I'm hoping I won't be fired for taking a couple of weeks off after the birth but we'll figure it out because we have to. I am happy for those that get PTO or actual maternity leave because that's not reality for most people and every little bit helps!
I feel fortunate to live in a community that is of the belief that it takes a village. Because of this I know we will have support in various ways and for once I won't be shy about asking for help when needed.
I do often day dream about what it must be like for people that get a substantial amount of time off and still collect their salery so they can spend time with their newborn. Kind of seem like a fairytale.
Where are you from? If you are from the United States, I was under the impression that FMLA was the law and they cannot deny you even unpaid medical leave; as in you cannot lose your job for taking medical leave under FMLA. Maternity falls under medical leave. I could be wrong.
A company is only required to comply with FMLA in certain circumstances. You have to have worked at a company for 12 months and have worked 1250 hours in that time if they do provide it and the company only has to provide it if you work at a location where there are at least 50 employees employed within 75 miles. So if you work for a small organization or something your employer doesn't have to follow FMLA.
Most companies do provide some time just to not look like jerks, but your job is only safe for 12 weeks (or any time really) if all that criteria is met.
I know we are all making the best of shitty situations, but it just sucks. Some moms want to go back to work, and there is NOTHING wrong with that, but those that want some more time should be able to take it without worrying about finances or getting fired. The fact that FMLA only protects workers in companies of 50+ is ridiculous. Families get no support in this country and are at the mercy of their employers.
The private religious school I worked at last year was not large enough for FMLA and said they only "recommend" taking 6 weeks, 8 for C-section, when I mentioned if I got pregnant again I would wish to take 12 weeks unpaid. I resigned because the job was seriously paying for childcare and the electric bill, but the fact that even a religious institution that preaches the value of family cannot even support its own employees to raise their families is crazy.
Reading all three pages of your stories makes me so angry and sad. It seems we're all working so hard to do what's right for our families when we are faced with so little financial support. Thinking of those who are worried about losing their jobs or having financial difficulties. Hugs.
Re: Maternity Leave is a JOKE
im very sorry this is happening to you guys, while im not in the same situation mine i slightly similar in the money department
as i said i am canadian, well my husband is american and military so..i had to move to america because his career was not a just up and leave one, where mine i can go anywhere
but because my dual citizenship isnt all done yet, i cant work..so i feel really bad for hubby as hes the only working person in our household
We pay for that through a lot of taxes and pretty much no way to get childcare for under-12 month olds, though. So basically, you have no choice but to take at least a year off.
I'm self employed, so no maternity leave for me! Luckily I do most of my work from home and it's very flexible, so I'm hoping to get back to it at least part time relatively quickly.
About paternity leave- I remember hearing about a study that found men who take longer leave (I think it was 3 months or so) actually end up being better fathers and more involved with their children throughout their child's entire life. That early bonding is so important.
Not sure if this is something any of your SO's would be interested in/able to do, but I have heard of fathers who don't get paid leave switching to part time (4 hours per day), so they are home more and can stretch it out longer. I always liked that idea, that may be what we end up doing (although my BF already has so much leave saved up its ridiculous, lol).
I just wanted to interject that I never realized how little time 6 weeks actually is until I had my daughter. While some new moms are ready to go back to work when their baby is 6 weeks (and that's ok), I feel like the vast majority are not. 6 week old babies are still brand new and completely helpless... And geez, so tiny! I hate that so many moms are forced to go back to work that early because they can't afford to take unpaid leave. It's a crappy system.
DS: Born 5-17-16
It has societal impacts as well, of course. Women who take less than a year are called bad mothers who are selfish and shouldn't have had kids in the first place pretty openly, because the financial pressure to get back to work soon just isn't there. So people don't get why any woman would want to go back to work before that year is up.
But overall, I'm okay with the system and a lot better than no leave, of course! It's just not as 100 percent positive as it often sounds to people when I explain it to them, which is why I mention this stuff.
Just curious? Are you German? Because I am and I never heard anyone around me making a comment like this badmouthing working mothers... I'm pretty sure people like this exist. It's just I never in my whole entire life came across someone like that. It just comes down to what works best for your family, who cares what other people think.
2010: Infertility
October 2015: missed miscarriage #2 at 11 weeks (trisomy 22)
That said, I am curious, do you know any women who returned to work before one year was over? Especially one who returned after less than six month? I don't. In over 80 percent of heterosexual households, women take 12 months, and the dad takes the minimum of two months concurrently with the mother.
https://fortune.com/2015/02/05/paid-parental-leave-costs/
2010: Infertility
October 2015: missed miscarriage #2 at 11 weeks (trisomy 22)
2010: Infertility
October 2015: missed miscarriage #2 at 11 weeks (trisomy 22)
At least you get paid something. I have not talked to HR yet, but from what I have read in the employee handbook, I don't think I get a thing and still have to pay for my insurance while I'm out. From what I read, maternity leave falls under FMLA. And that is pretty much all the handbook says about that other than you have to pay your insurance when you are out.
I'll talk to HR later on when I get further along.
I could probably get a couple weeks PTO I'm guessing since we have unlimited PTO, but I don't want to push it. Right now I guess I"m saving based on the little bit of info that I have which means I"m going to have to still pay my college loans somehow during that time, as well as a personal loan I had to take out to pay the medical bills from the miscarriage earlier this year. All that on top of groceries and stuff.
Edit: I just looked at our employee handbook again. They apparently have updated it since I looked last. I take back all of what I said above. Ours is the first two weeks is PTO and then weeks 3 through 6 is STD and supplemented with PTO and then weeks 7+ is just STD.
First Pregnancy
Second Pregnancy
- BFP: 09/11/2015
- EDD: 05/25/2016
Baby Born04/15/2016
PGAL
If I am just taking regular vacation and not maternity leave then I can use it whenever during the year I want to and don't have to wait until it is accrued. Since it is maternity leave I can only use what has been accrued so far. I might go back to work in mid August for a couple of weeks then take another week vacation once DH is teaching again to extend our time at home a bit, but would have to clear it with my boss. I will need to save vacation for appointments since DH doesn't really get vacation time being a teacher.
I had a co-worker have a baby last week and she's coming back next week- 2 weeks post partum.
Hilariously (in a How Am I So Effed? kind of way) my state has a TDI program so everyone else in the state gets paid maternity leave, but state employees are excluded from the TDI mandate. Criminal.
Been married since 2009.
Unicornuate Uterus (yes I menstruate glitter)
Several MCs
DD born 2013 (our miracle "you can't have babies" baby!)
Been married since 2009.
Unicornuate Uterus (yes I menstruate glitter)
Several MCs
DD born 2013 (our miracle "you can't have babies" baby!)
I am happy for those that get PTO or actual maternity leave because that's not reality for most people and every little bit helps!
I feel fortunate to live in a community that is of the belief that it takes a village. Because of this I know we will have support in various ways and for once I won't be shy about asking for help when needed.
I do often day dream about what it must be like for people that get a substantial amount of time off and still collect their salery so they can spend time with their newborn. Kind of seem like a fairytale.
Where are you from? If you are from the United States, I was under the impression that FMLA was the law and they cannot deny you even unpaid medical leave; as in you cannot lose your job for taking medical leave under FMLA. Maternity falls under medical leave. I could be wrong.
First Pregnancy
Second Pregnancy
- BFP: 09/11/2015
- EDD: 05/25/2016
Baby Born04/15/2016
PGAL
TTC#2: BFP: 8-23-15 MMC: 10-29-15
DD 2: 9-15-16
DD 3: 9-16-17
Where are you from? If you are from the United States, I was under the impression that FMLA was the law and they cannot deny you even unpaid medical leave; as in you cannot lose your job for taking medical leave under FMLA. Maternity falls under medical leave. I could be wrong.
A company is only required to comply with FMLA in certain circumstances. You have to have worked at a company for 12 months and have worked 1250 hours in that time if they do provide it and the company only has to provide it if you work at a location where there are at least 50 employees employed within 75 miles. So if you work for a small organization or something your employer doesn't have to follow FMLA.
Most companies do provide some time just to not look like jerks, but your job is only safe for 12 weeks (or any time really) if all that criteria is met.