I've not posted about this yet but I have read all of the comments. Just based on the amount of people who have had to have it done later in life for whatever reason I would just do it at the hospital. It's just not something I would want my child to potentially have to go through later on. When my twin brothers were born (I was 17) they had it done and had no problems at all. It was easy to care for after and they healed quickly. As for labias, I personally (maybe TMI but that's the point) have one that is much larger than the other. The labia minora not majora. I would LOVE to have it surgically fixed but I'm scared of the pain TBH. I might still do it eventually. I wish it wasn't an issue.
I have a little guy who is now 16 months old. We did not circumcise him. Personally I think it isn't necessary, which is why it's no longer covered by insurance in Canada. Ontario specifically. I have a whole group of moms we spend our time with and there are several boys in the group-- the majority are not circumcised. Seems far more ordinary these days. Of the 6 boys, 1 is circumcised but they too had a horrible experience with it. He will have to go back again when he's older and may experience long term issues. It's just heartbreaking. Obviously this doesn't always happen! But the risk was not worth it for us. That's my personal take, but to each their own.
I have to agree with some of the pp's. Although it's become normal to us as a society, cutting a child's genitals for "hygiene" reasons is like saying you're going to cut off his belly button because he doesn't need it and you know he won't clean it well. Hm.
But just curious, would you remove your daughter's labia if it reduced the risk of an std? Some also say it is more hygienic to remove labia.
Probably the risk of labia removal would far out weigh the benefits. Removal of labia would require stitches post procedure and with a much higher risk of bleeding out from the amount of tissue removed vs removal of foreskin.
All things can be considered and the benefits assessed against the drawbacks.
Maybe if people want to be super progressive, they should remove their daughters' hymens. You know, because some girls have imperforate hymens and that can cause serious problems at puberty. And you get rid of the whole "virgin" stigma and fear of pain of first time sex.
@StephPegasus this is exactly what I think! FGM is so appalling in our society but not male circumcision. I don't really get why either. Some "doctors" claim that FGM also helps to prevent UTIs, so would you be willing to do that to your baby girls?
One reason FGM is so strongly reacted to, is that it alters the entire vaginal area. The clitoris/hood is cut Ooff, the labia removed, and the actual opening is sewn partly shut. This is all to the purpose of making sex unpleasant for the woman, thereby ensuring that she will remain pure until marriage. Male circumcision is not regularly done to remove sexual pleasure. While that is a reason it was so widely publicized in the early US, that is not the reason it came about, or the reason it remains such a common occurance.
There also aren't studies that show FGM or female circumcision prevent or lower UTIs while there are studies that show a reduction, however small, in male UTIs.
Formerly known as Kate08young August '18 Siggy April Showers:
Me: 28 H: 24 Married: 7/22/14 Baby L: 8/4/2015 August 2015 Moms Baby E: 11/18/2016 December 2016 Moms TTC #3 08/2017 BFP 11/27/2017. Twin B lost 11/22/2017, Twin A doing well.
@StephPegasus this is exactly what I think! FGM is so appalling in our society but not male circumcision. I don't really get why either. Some "doctors" claim that FGM also helps to prevent UTIs, so would you be willing to do that to your baby girls?
One reason FGM is so strongly reacted to, is that it alters the entire vaginal area. The clitoris/hood is cut Ooff, the labia removed, and the actual opening is sewn partly shut. This is all to the purpose of making sex unpleasant for the woman, thereby ensuring that she will remain pure until marriage.
It does depend on the culture in question as to whether infibulation is performed, which is the most severe form of female genital mutilation, and which you are referring to. Sometimes it is merely removal of the hood and glans, or both and the inner labia. It isn't entirely to prevent sexual pleasure, there are also social stigmas associated with not having the procedure done - a reason many people posted in this thread as at least part of their basis for their decision to alter their son's penis (not wanting them to be different from their fathers, avoiding potential teasing from peers and/or potential sexual rejection). In terms of health dangers, yes FGM can have much more severe consequences. But in terms of human rights, the issue is very similar. People are choosing to alter another person's body based on their ideals.
^^^ this! You are describing the most extreme form of FGM. There really isn't much more for me to add other than what @StephPegasus said. I will add however, that studies can be manipulated to a certain degree to give you the desired results. Also, money and funding of research plays a big factor at times. I am sure that the doctors that perform FGM can provide studies showing how it is more hygienic and reduces risks of infection just as there are studies saying the same about male circumcision.
ETA: it is claimed that male circumcision reduces sensitivity during intercourse, so by circumcising boys, are we not also altering their sexual pleasure?
If o have a boy we will be doing it. It's not so much of an issue until later in life but when I did my CNA clinicals we saw that a lot of the elderly men had issues cleaning properly (due to old age ect.) And it caused them a great deal of discomfort and pain. Also embarrassment when we had to go in an clean inside the foreskin for them.
Your sons will thank you for getting them circumcised when they get older
Is that your own personal experience speaking? Or just an assumption based on your opinion regarding male circumcision? It's impossible to know what everyone's sons will say to them regarding whether or not their penis has been altered. Please don't make blanket statements like that.
It comes across as extremely judgmental, and OP has requested this thread to be a judgment free zone.
Not everyone may agree with this way of thinking but I'm letting my husband decide. He is circumcised and has a buddy who isn't so he knows the pros and cons. I will look into the actual procedure once we find out if we're having a boy to see what to expect but since I don't have a penis I don't know firsthand the long term benefits of either option. I will get educated on it but I feel like my husband has a better say on this since he's had a penis for 26 years and I have not. But that is just what works for our family! Good luck OP!
Your sons will thank you for getting them circumcised when they get older
Really? Because when my husband and I started researching circumsicion when we were pregnant with our first, he felt a lot of anger towards his parents. Your comment is a generalization and ignorant.
I have mixed emotions on this subject.
I grew up in a family where my parents thought circumsicion was unnecessary and inhumane. My dad was circumcised, but my parents decided not to circumcise my brother. Fast forward. My brother is now 23 and HATES that my parents didn't circumsize him. Obviously, this will not be the experience/opinion of all uncircumsized men, but it was my brother's. He was made fun of by his friends all growing up, and still gets teased for it today. He has a great sense of humor about it, so that aspect didn't really affect him, he just doesn't like the "look" of his penis (that was a weird statement to make about my brother...).
My husband is adamant that our son (if/when we have one) will be circumcised. I struggle with this, but have decided that I will defer to him on all penis-related issues (but we'll see how I feel when/if this becomes a reality).
Circumcision it's not something that's very common from where I'm from and none of my family members are circumcised. DH is also not circumcised. Easy decision right ? Nope I was still torn and wanted to make the right decision for my son. We ended up not circumcising our son and will do that same if this LO is a boy. I understand the religious reasons for Circumcisions but that's it . The whole hygiene/cleanliness thing doesn't make sense to me. They need to be taught how to clean themselves as with all body parts or u can have issues. The elderly men issue is awful but elderly people in general can struggle with many things that weren't a problem their entire lives so that wasn't a good enough reason for us. Should we remove other things that elderly people may not be able to keep clean as they age ? What would be left. Lastly we decided his body was made this way so it was for a reason and that's good enough for us .
I don't know my babies gender, I'm waiting until d-day. But, it's a no for me. I believe in body integrity. For the same reason I did not pierce my daughters ears. It is overwhemingly a cosmetic procedure. My family members who were born at home have had no issues as children or in their adult lives. Caring for newborn is difficult enough without having to worry about the pain and proper care for a wound in such a sensitive area. Birth is tough on babies, there's a lot going on inside them that's unseen. It just makes me too nervous.
If o have a boy we will be doing it. It's not so much of an issue until later in life but when I did my CNA clinicals we saw that a lot of the elderly men had issues cleaning properly (due to old age ect.) And it caused them a great deal of discomfort and pain. Also embarrassment when we had to go in an clean inside the foreskin for them.
So if I have a son, yes he will be circumsized.
If a person is elderly and affected physically to the point that they are not able to clean their foreskin properly, even though it was something they had undoubtably been capable of doing it their whole life to that point, I would say that a lot of things such as going to the toilet, and all other personal hygiene and related activities would be an issue, and that person should be in care?!
In saying that, no males in my family have had the procedure done, and they have not suffered personal hygiene issues, whether young or old. I will certainly not doing it to my child. I understand that this is somewhat of a cultural issue, but I certainly do not think it should be a "hygiene" issue.
I'd just like to add that the locker room point is pretty much null and void. In Canada, less than 30% of boys are circumcised. (A statistic from 2006. It's dropped since then, but I didn't want to write a percentage without being certain). Which means that circumcised boys are going to be the minority, and likely be the target of bullying.
I urge you anyone considering it to do extensive, unbiased research on the topic.
My DH is not circumcised and I read the blog @Cricket99 posted and I have to say that all of the sexual benefits the article quoted for non circumcision are true. In 13 our 13yrs together, we have never had to use lubrication and sex with my DH has never been painful (a benefit of the foreskin apparently). If baby 2 is a boy, we will most likely not circumcise him. There is not much benefit according to scientific research, in fact there is more protection for the urethra and less chance of infection with intact foreskin and with proper hygiene, the area can be kept clean.
Honestly I would go with the snip snip cause medical research has shown it to be healthier for boys to avoid getting dirt and germs trapped in the foreskin plus it is more attractive to see a circumcised penis than an uncircumcised one. I would never let a man with a foreskin touch me. Just get it done and over with. He will thank you later.
Honestly I would go with the snip snip cause medical research has shown it to be healthier for boys to avoid getting dirt and germs trapped in the foreskin plus it is more attractive to see a circumcised penis than an uncircumcised one. I would never let a man with a foreskin touch me. Just get it done and over with. He will thank you later.
***le sigh***
There was another comment like this above. It is extremely judgmental and offensive to make a blanket statement like this. You have no way of knowing what anyone's son will say to them regarding whether their penis has been altered. OP has requested this thread to be a judgment free zone, so in the future if you're going to comment on a thread like this please respect the wishes of the original poster.
Please don't make this decision based on the personal, anecdotal experiences of people here. Everyone's individual life experiences are valid for them, but this is ultimately a medical procedure, albiet a small one, please make medical decisions based on medical facts. You should seek out actual statistics about complications of having it done versus remaining uncircumcised and make your decision based on this information and your religious and cultural values.
Also, the idea that someone would 'never let an uncircumcized man touch you' is a shocking statement to me, and as a woman married to a wonderful and very hygenic uncircumcized man, kind of ridiculous, immature, and offensive.
Honestly I would go with the snip snip cause medical research has shown it to be healthier for boys to avoid getting dirt and germs trapped in the foreskin plus it is more attractive to see a circumcised penis than an uncircumcised one. I would never let a man with a foreskin touch me. Just get it done and over with. He will thank you later.
If you wouldn't let a man with foreskin touch you because of all these trapped germs and dirt maybe your just talking to the wrong men. I also happen to think a circumcised penis is more attractive so your statement is incorrect people like different things. Also do you have one of those handy crystal balls ? Cuz if you don't you can't tell me what my son will thank me for a decade from now.
I had my DS circumcised. There were a few factors that went into the decision making process:
1.) Worrying about teaching him how to care for an uncircumcised area when older. My SO is circumcised so he does not have experience in that department either.
2.) Insurance doesn't cover the procedure as it is not deemed medically necessary. Could we afford it? Most OB/GYN's (they perform the procedure normally) offer payment plans or discounts for paying all at once. We had saved for the procedure once we made our decision.
3.) Do the benefits outweigh the risk? There is scientific evidence that backs the theory that circumcision can reduce the risk of certain infections including UTI's. As with any procedure, there is risk of infection of the incision site. As long as proper hygienic methods are applied, you can reduce these risks.
It is a decision that I would choose again if LO is a boy as well. Most doctors will take the baby into a separate room and use a local topical anesthetic to numb the area. They will show you how to dress the area when changing his diapers and what to watch out for.
As long as proper hygienic methods are applied, you can reduce these risks.
Not because I want to discredit your choice but I feel like you contradict yourself with this statement as you could use the same logic to apply it to leaving your son uncircumcised.
As long as proper hygienic methods are applied, you can reduce these risks.
Not because I want to discredit your choice but I feel like you contradict yourself with this statement as you could use the same logic to apply it to leaving your son uncircumcised.
It was a decision making factor that actually went both ways. #1 was actually the most important deciding factor.
Hi. My DH and I just had this discussion with my OB yesterday. My husband, his brothers and father are not circumcised and we are having a son. If you actually find the source of this procedure in America is would shock you! It dates back to victorian times and a certain prude cereal maker who thought that makes should not masturbate and thus taught that circumcision was the answer... It's quite interesting if you look into it. We told my OB yesterday that we do not plan to circumcise our son and she said no biggie to her since neither the AMA not the American Academy of Pediatrics recommends this procedure any longer and rates have dropped to about 50%. I do not wish to mutilate my sons genitalia just for aesthetics. Lastly, while I have not seen every penis on the planet... I have seen my fair share and they all look weird to me whether they have a turtleneck (what we call it) or not. To each his own, but it sounds like there are just as many boys out there that will look like my son as yours... Which is fine by me, he will have more enjoyable sex as an adult. Congrats to all!
"One of the leading advocates of circumcision was John Harvey Kellogg. He advocated the consumption of Kellogg's corn flakes to prevent masturbation, and he believed that circumcision would be an effective way to eliminate masturbation in males." Thus here we are!
I personally wouldn't hesitate. My godson didn't get circumcision because it's right where insurance companies decided it was an elective procedure and didn't cover it, and my dear friend couldn't afford it. The money she has spent in doctors visits from infections has been more than the circumcision. Some people are prone to UTI and this is just increasing this risk. My husband hands down would want a circumcision and I figure- well he's a guy and has it done so it's probably for a reason. I might defer to your husband on this since he's a boy and the baby is a boy and don't let "research" get in the way. Most research is just snooping unless you're really investing into all avenues of genuine research- anatomy, physiology, history, etc. best of luck!
I'm from India and this stuff is really interesting.. I didn't even know this was a prevalent practice and hadn't even heard of male circumcision until a few years back.. :-O I felt really stupid after reading this thread but after a quick web search I learned that it's anyways not practiced widely here and less than 15% get it done and only in some communities.. I asked my husband and he says he doesn't know anybody who has gotten it either.. But we do have the practice of getting kids' ears pierced at the age of 1 (for both boys and girls) but it's not just for aesthetics.. The ear lobe is supposed to be some positive accupressure points (or something like that) !!!
Honestly I would go with the snip snip cause medical research has shown it to be healthier for boys to avoid getting dirt and germs trapped in the foreskin plus it is more attractive to see a circumcised penis than an uncircumcised one. I would never let a man with a foreskin touch me. Just get it done and over with. He will thank you later.
WOW... And women have the audacity to complain about the pressures to look a certain way. Well I would never be friends w a woman who makes such judgmental comments as ". I would never let a man with a foreskin touch me." How disgusting.
I watched a dateline or 20/20 episode years ago where there's actually a movement of men who are upset about having been circumcised and are reversing or attempting to reverse the process w homemade weights they've rigged up, think extremely painful! I'm sure they're thanking their mothers
I personally wouldn't hesitate. My godson didn't get circumcision because it's right where insurance companies decided it was an elective procedure and didn't cover it, and my dear friend couldn't afford it. The money she has spent in doctors visits from infections has been more than the circumcision. Some people are prone to UTI and this is just increasing this risk. My husband hands down would want a circumcision and I figure- well he's a guy and has it done so it's probably for a reason. I might defer to your husband on this since he's a boy and the baby is a boy and don't let "research" get in the way. Most research is just snooping unless you're really investing into all avenues of genuine research- anatomy, physiology, history, etc. best of luck!
I'm sorry, but what??? Don't do your research in order to make an informed joint parenting decision regarding altering your son's genitalia? Research is all a conspiracy!!!!!
My husband is in the military and recently had a soldier under him go in for circumcision as an adult. I don't know the reasons his parents didn't do it for him as a baby but he cited big reasons for doing it now as embarrassment. I know that he stayed out of work for two weeks and is restricted from physical activity for an additional month. I don't know what I'm having yet, but I'm sure that if it's a boy, he will be circumcised. All of that^^^, does NOT sound like fun.
My husband is in the military and recently had a soldier under him go in for circumcision as an adult. I don't know the reasons his parents didn't do it for him as a baby but he cited big reasons for doing it now as embarrassment. I know that he stayed out of work for two weeks and is restricted from physical activity for an additional month. I don't know what I'm having yet, but I'm sure that if it's a boy, he will be circumcised. All of that^^^, does NOT sound like fun.
One man's experience is not representative of the population of intact men as a whole. Hopefully you are basing your decision on more than just one anecdote.
Look, it shouldn't matter to anyone what another mother chooses when it comes to their child (with best interest in mind, obviously). My only hope is that whichever side of the penis debate you fall on, is that you do your research for yourself. Look up pros and cons and make an educated decision with your significant other. Don't rely on word of mouth stories of 1 or 2 horror stories about not cutting, and don't rely on scare tactics from others who assume and vocalize you're a shit mother for for deciding to have the circumcision done. RESEARCH and make an informed decision. This is one of many, many, many difficult decisions you will make for your child, the best you can do is educate yourself and go from there.
Re: Circumcision (no negative comments**)
That's my personal take, but to each their own.
Probably the risk of labia removal would far out weigh the benefits. Removal of labia would require stitches post procedure and with a much higher risk of bleeding out from the amount of tissue removed vs removal of foreskin. All things can be considered and the benefits assessed against the drawbacks.
Male circumcision is not regularly done to remove sexual pleasure. While that is a reason it was so widely publicized in the early US, that is not the reason it came about, or the reason it remains such a common occurance.
There also aren't studies that show FGM or female circumcision prevent or lower UTIs while there are studies that show a reduction, however small, in male UTIs.
Formerly known as Kate08young
August '18 Siggy April Showers:
Married: 7/22/14
Baby L: 8/4/2015 August 2015 Moms
Baby E: 11/18/2016 December 2016 Moms
TTC #3 08/2017 BFP 11/27/2017.
Twin B lost 11/22/2017, Twin A doing well.
It isn't entirely to prevent sexual pleasure, there are also social stigmas associated with not having the procedure done - a reason many people posted in this thread as at least part of their basis for their decision to alter their son's penis (not wanting them to be different from their fathers, avoiding potential teasing from peers and/or potential sexual rejection).
In terms of health dangers, yes FGM can have much more severe consequences.
But in terms of human rights, the issue is very similar. People are choosing to alter another person's body based on their ideals.
Edited for clarity.
You are describing the most extreme form of FGM. There really isn't much more for me to add other than what @StephPegasus said.
I will add however, that studies can be manipulated to a certain degree to give you the desired results. Also, money and funding of research plays a big factor at times. I am sure that the doctors that perform FGM can provide studies showing how it is more hygienic and reduces risks of infection just as there are studies saying the same about male circumcision.
ETA: it is claimed that male circumcision reduces sensitivity during intercourse, so by circumcising boys, are we not also altering their sexual pleasure?
So if I have a son, yes he will be circumsized.
Or just an assumption based on your opinion regarding male circumcision?
It's impossible to know what everyone's sons will say to them regarding whether or not their penis has been altered. Please don't make blanket statements like that.
It comes across as extremely judgmental, and OP has requested this thread to be a judgment free zone.
In saying that, no males in my family have had the procedure done, and they have not suffered personal hygiene issues, whether young or old. I will certainly not doing it to my child. I understand that this is somewhat of a cultural issue, but I certainly do not think it should be a "hygiene" issue.
I urge you anyone considering it to do extensive, unbiased research on the topic.
There was another comment like this above. It is extremely judgmental and offensive to make a blanket statement like this. You have no way of knowing what anyone's son will say to them regarding whether their penis has been altered. OP has requested this thread to be a judgment free zone, so in the future if you're going to comment on a thread like this please respect the wishes of the original poster.
I had my DS circumcised. There were a few factors that went into the decision making process:
1.) Worrying about teaching him how to care for an uncircumcised area when older. My SO is circumcised so he does not have experience in that department either.
2.) Insurance doesn't cover the procedure as it is not deemed medically necessary. Could we afford it? Most OB/GYN's (they perform the procedure normally) offer payment plans or discounts for paying all at once. We had saved for the procedure once we made our decision.
3.) Do the benefits outweigh the risk? There is scientific evidence that backs the theory that circumcision can reduce the risk of certain infections including UTI's. As with any procedure, there is risk of infection of the incision site. As long as proper hygienic methods are applied, you can reduce these risks.
It is a decision that I would choose again if LO is a boy as well. Most doctors will take the baby into a separate room and use a local topical anesthetic to numb the area. They will show you how to dress the area when changing his diapers and what to watch out for.
I asked my husband and he says he doesn't know anybody who has gotten it either..
But we do have the practice of getting kids' ears pierced at the age of 1 (for both boys and girls) but it's not just for aesthetics.. The ear lobe is supposed to be some positive accupressure points (or something like that) !!!
I watched a dateline or 20/20 episode years ago where there's actually a movement of men who are upset about having been circumcised and are reversing or attempting to reverse the process w homemade weights they've rigged up, think extremely painful! I'm sure they're thanking their mothers
Don't do your research in order to make an informed joint parenting decision regarding altering your son's genitalia?
Research is all a conspiracy!!!!!
All of that^^^, does NOT sound like fun.