Move prior or post delivery?

McRad

I am hoping for some guidance from prior mamas who have moved close to their due date or soon after.

My husband was informed an office for his company 1K miles away in Colorado has opened and we have always had the goal of getting there. My parents are coming out to visit us in Tennessee at the end of July which means we wouldn't be able to move until first of August (in the heat and humidity). My due date is first week of October. We have no family here to help pack and load a Uhaul and, literally, two friends who have kids.

My question to those of you who have done a move close to birth would be should we go for it prior to baby's arrival or wait a few weeks/ months after delivery? This is considering transferring OB doctors mid pregnancy compared to finding new a pediatrician, having a 1K mile drive with a newborn and post delivery compared to being large and in charge pregnant, and just the emotional side of "starting over" with a new town, new people, no family, no friends as a FTM.

Granted, this is not a "you have to move" order from his office but a decision we both had made the day we heard an office was in the works 2 years ago-- just didn't expect to be pregnant at the time. We both love the west, love the mountains, and thrilled to get back out that way.

Opinions and your experiences would be greatly appreciated.

shannond21228

We moved when our twins were about two months. We were suppose to move before they arrived but they made an early arrival. The boys were in the NICU for a little over a month and we stayed with my parents until we could move 6 hours away. We were lucky that they helped us move and our boys were great in the car.
We are moving in August and I'll be just getting into the third trimester when we move from Louisiana to Minnesota. This time we have movers through the army to pack and move our stuff. We will drive up with our 2 1/2 year olds and two dogs. We've made the drive before to visit family and it wasn't too terrible granted I wasn't pregnant. Our plan is to take lots of breaks and pray it all goes smoothly.
I guess I really don't have advice but it can be done. Good luck!

sarahewilliams118

Where in Colorado are you planning to move to? I am a native and live in Colorado Springs! My husband and I are moving 20 mins away, to monument in the next couple of weeks, but obviously I am no help in moving big boxes and furniture.. Lol I can't say if it is better before or after, however if you are coming to the Colorado Springs area I can recommend doctor Genrich at Academy Woman's healthcare associates!! He is excellent and his office is connected to the hospital so he delivers most of his patients babies!

Best of luck!!

sarahewilliams118

Also I can recommend an awesome pediatrician too.... Wish I had more advice on the move itself, but either way just know everything will work itself out no matter when you move. I would think moving prior to your due date would be best, but I'm not sure.

arwestover3

That's a great age to drive with a newborn! We moved about 1000 miles too when our daughter was 4 weeks old. That being said, we had tons of friends and family helping on both ends, and it definitely wouldn't have worked out so well without that.

double2rouble

I think I would wait until after you move just so you don't have to switch doctors for delivery.  We moved when my daughter was 3 months old and it wasn't too bad.  I was actually able to help lift boxes etc by that point.  If you are planing to move soon after delivery I'd pack before.  Also wait and get the babies furniture in the new place so you don't have to move it.

On the other side, it would have been nice to set up her nursery before she came.  

McRad

@sarahewilliams118 Thanks for the info! We will be in the Denver area, haven't settled on a specific location yet but plan to rent for a year to figure where we'd like to buy.
If they end up close by, and if we move prior, I will have to give them a call. Thanks for the info!

McRad

@double2rouble Thanks for the advise. We actually have baby's crib set up already along with quite a few big ticket items. I think we missed the mark in that. My husband was too excited to wait to set things up. Ha!

The concern I had was lifting boxes and helping to move furniture, if that was a possibility, and also doing it with no help to either watch our baby or help us pack up.

Rikki_5

I haven't moved when having a baby...but...I think you should move before.  I've moved several times long distance coast-to-coast and I couldn't imagine doing it with a new infant.  Plus, I think it will be a bonus for your recuperation to be settled after baby is born without having to think about relocating.  Could you tell your parents to come earlier?  And perhaps help you pack up? You can also ask if his company assists with relocation, they may provide movers at no costs to load the boxes and furniture. Another think, check out PODS or a moving company where you just load your stuff and deliver it.  Renting a Uhaul is so much work and still kind of expensive.  That way you just have to load up the trailer and its delivered to your new residence or warehouse nearby where your new house is and you just have to unload it once you get there.  Maybe even your parents could make the drive with you to help unload?   You could also still ask your friends to help, maybe even their kids too depending on their ages. Free pizza!

It won't be easy but I would definitely think about making this move before baby if possible.  If you HAVE to move in August that still gives you 2 months to set up baby's nursery and prepare for arrival.  You can also still switch OBs at that time.  I would also suggest checking out the boards where the locals are "Denver babies" on the bump for advice and support.  Good luck to you and I'm jealous by the way, my goal eventually is to get back out west to Washington but that probably won't be for a couple of years  

amorrison624

We made it a point to move before my babies make their arrival. I can't imagine getting used to a baby, with possibly little sleep, living in chaos. I wanted to be settled and relaxed before the babies get here. It's stressful enough packing and finding a house. I can't imagine doing it with an infant.

bbiutmcph

I would move prior to having the baby.  We are in the process of looking to buy a new house and last night was just telling my husband that if we haven't found the house before I deliver I would rather wait until after the holidays so I am feeling better and things are less hectic.  You never know how your recovery will be and adding a move on top of that is a lot.  With my first it took me a good 6 months to feel really normal again.  My second was much better and I was good to go in two weeks but you just never know. Even if you aren't 100% settled in the new house at least you are there and not worrying about the move, getting settled, and dealing with PP emotions and new mom feelings and trying to figure out motherhood on top of moving.  

on_the_move

With both of my kids we moved shortly after. For DS he was about 2 months and DD was 3 weeks. Both times it was a pain and I would have much rather done it ahead of time. With DS we had movers from the company and with DD we had lots of family come. Normally I am all about doing it yourself, but this is a time I would really hire some help to at least load a truck. Babies eat often and if you are driving a car and DH is driving the Uhaul it will mean lots of stops. They are also much quieter on the inside.

Rikki_5

@on_the_move hey..just wanted to tell you I love that pregnancy avatar you have at the bottom...it made me tear up!

shannond21228

Maybe if you have some neighbors with some teenagers they could help you load some of your stuff? You could pay them in pizza!

aethams

My dh and I are having this same dilemma and we are really hoping to move in the beginning of August as well with my due date being Oct 4th seems like the exact same time frame as OP. I don't think I could handle trying to unpack and juggle a newborn in a new city where we know basically no one. It's not ideal to find a new doc and all of that but I feel like it's worth it to do it before! Once the baby is here things can already be settled for the most part and if they aren't some of the family that's coming to help in the first few weeks can also help with organizing anything that's left to unpack!

amberrmariee20

My sister is moving this week and she's due July 20th, so she's like 8 months ! She helped with the painting, and moving but didn't lift the heavy things. She said its tiring her out quick but she has her boyfriend to help and a few others !

JaqiDec04

I think there could be a lot of variables in this answer.

If he's moving for the company, are they paying for the mover & movers? If so, then I think I could do either pre or post baby. Since I wouldn't have to do much.

If we have to do a lot of the moving ourselves, then I would do it pre-baby. I've moved with and without kids, and it is SO much harder with kids. Just assume you will be able to do basically nothing with a new baby around. DD needed to eat every 2 hours for the first four weeks. There was no way I could have done a 1000 mile road trip. In fact, this time around, we're not even sure we're going to make it home for Christmas when DS is 8 weeks old, and its only 250 miles. Having to stop every 2 hours to feed and change a newborn on a 1000 mile car ride...that would be a LONG trip.

McRad

Yes, @JaqiDec04 I should have clarified. They said they would pay for moving but we haven't confirmed if that's just Uhaul expenses, Uhaul and fuel (that was the case when we initially did our 2K mile move out here) or if it's actual movers coming to pack, move, and unpack us. If they say movers are the way they're going I'm on board to doing it ASAP.
They also just told us that they have temporary 6month housing set up for us to get settled and then go from there.

@Rikki_5 I'd love to have my parents come earlier but flights have been purchased and you know how much of a pain it is to switch flights after. Bummer deal for sure. I'm sure they'd be much happier to fly to Denver than Tennessee though. Haha


After reading everyone's comments and experiences, I'm thinking pre baby makes more sense. It's a long ass drive, we did it twice two years ago back to back and it would be twice as long with a newborn and feeding and changing.

Thank you all for your input. It's not seeming like as much of a daunting task hearing how you all did the move, some prior and others after! You are giving me encouragement!

eat111315

Just another vote for moving before. We moved in August while I was 7 mos pregnant with my first. It was hot and hormonal but much more managable than it would have been with a baby. We hired movers to load and unload the truck but did the packing ourselves.
Good luck!

allielouu

I moved while I was pregnant with my DD. I know you will be miserable and won't be much help since you can't lift, but I feel it would be far better to have you're house set up and ready for baby when you come home opposed to having to redo a whole house after you have the baby.. I like to have everything set up and ready to go befofe baby arrives. Although switching drs mid pregnancy can be a pain.

kacichch

I plan on moving at the end of August 8 weeks before due date. I was planning on staying where I am until after the baby's born but I sat one day last week looking at all the baby bits I have already, looking at what I still need and realised that for me I had to move, I had to be ready for the baby, I didn't want the stress and upheaval with a newborn of having to redecorate, start making furniture, unpack etc. It would probably take a couple of weeks before the new place would be completey finished for us. That way I will know what nursery furniture I can buy, what theme I can go for, what new furniture we might need according to room sizes etc. I know it will be tiring doing the move whilst pregnant but for me I just wanted it over and done with. I don't know how drs etc work in America but in the UK all drs have access to all of your medical records wherever you are? And it's simple joining a new surgery here so for me it wouldn't be a concern. But then our drs and midwives aren't at our delivery, we have whoever is on shift at the hospital. Good luck with whatever you decide to do

nbpa3027

I would move before the baby comes. Maybe take advantage of the fact that your parents are visiting to use their help to pack? If you aren't going to be getting movers, I second the recommendation to use a company like PODS. When we moved we used Pack Rat because they were way cheaper. They deliver the container to your door and you can have it there as long as you would like so you can slowly pack it up. It might work well because you can have it delivered while your parents are there so they can help load it. The company then picks it up and delivers it to your new place. They can even store it for you if you need. We weren't moving 1000 miles, but it still ended up being cheaper to get 2 containers and store them for a month than the u-haul one way rental with mileage.

Moving either way will be stressful, there are lots of circumstances that would make moving with a newborn a lot more difficult. If you were to move after the baby was born, I don't know how long you would be waiting. If you were to need a csection you might end up being able to do less packing than pregnant and you never know what kind of personality your little one will have. When my son was tiny he was a pretty good baby, but wanted to be held all the time. It would have been tough, but we probably could have moved with him. My daughter on the otherhand, had a really difficult time eating and she was just not a happy baby. She wasn't colicky, but pretty much cried for the first 4-5 months of her life she was a terrible sleeper and at that age would only sleep 45min to an hour at a time, even at night. There is no way we could have moved until she was 6 or so months old just for our sanity.

Another factor to consider would be the weather. I feel like it would be easier to move in the humidity than the snow.

Moving can be very emotional for lots of reasons, but a new baby is actually a great way to meet new people and make new friends. A lot of hospitals have classes and support groups for new parents and parents to be. You can also find different moms and dads groups. When they are babies all of those groups are more about the moms than socializing the babies.

JaqiDec04

eat111315 said:

Just another vote for moving before. We moved in August while I was 7 mos pregnant with my first. It was hot and hormonal but much more managable than it would have been with a baby. We hired movers to load and unload the truck but did the packing ourselves. Good luck!

This is also an option, and how we did our last two moves. I did all the packing, rented the u-hauls, and packed as much as we could. Then hired "movers" for all the larger things, they packed everything up, and then we hired movers in our new town, to unpack everything.

And remember, packing it up will take 2-3 times longer than unpacking. We had a whole u-haul unpacked, with the help of two movers, in less than an hour. It was well worth the money spent. They even put together some of the larger furniture pieces, and installed our appliances.

So even if the company is only willing to pay fuel & u-haul, it might be worth the cost to look into someone to help you load & unload.

Good luck! Moving long distance is tough.

AGMeeks

I'd recommend either doing it before or waiting until the baby is a few months old. We moved shortly after my second was born, and it was just awful. The day before the movers were supposed to come, our newborn (11 days old) got sick with a 104 degree fever that required a three day hospitalization. I realize that this might have happened regardless, but I always think that we were all stretched too thin and were not being as careful as we should have been about hand washing. She ended up just fine (and is now an amazing 3 year old) but maybe if we'd been more focused on our little one in those first days with her, she might not have gotten sick at all. Just my experience...