Bed Rest Woes — The Bump
June 2015 Moms

Bed Rest Woes

First time poster, long time lurker on the boards. Due 6/22 with our first son, I'm 32 weeks and have been on strict bed rest due to cervical incompetence and funneling that was found when I leaked a bunch of amniotic fluid all over my couch at the beginning of my 29th week and ended up in the hospital... No dehydration and my fluid built back up, so they believe I had a hole in my membranes that healed itself with rest in the hospital and released me after a negative fibronectin test. I still got antibiotics and two steroid injections for baby's lungs just in case and have since had to do vaginal progesterone suppositories twice a day. I've had miserable cramping (and anxiety because of it) my entire pregnancy and some guilt because as much as I want to be a mother and as long as the road was to get here to, I have hated pregnancy and it's been a lot harder than I ever imagined. I've always worked and am hating just laying around, especially because I was SO active the first 29 weeks and didn't have nearly as much discomfort as I've experienced since just laying around for the last three weeks. My amazing husband is working almost 70 hours a week to support us while I can't work and deal with the horrendous NYS short term disability folks to try to get paid. I'm just miserable, sore, lonely, sad, and anxious laying around. I have books, magazines, Pinterest, some adult coloring books, of course Netflix, and my two cats and dog to keep me company during the day, but we live far out from my family and close friends so I spend all day alone in bed and it's been awful. Our nursery isn't even done yet and we have no idea when/if/how we'll get the finishing touches completed and of course I'm up to pee every half hour walking right by and being reminded of that, too... Everyone keeps preaching to enjoy my alone time, get my rest now, yadda yadda, nothing helpful or comforting at all and it sucks to think to myself "yep, I know you're so right, this is just great what was I thinking!!" I feel so whiny and pitiful sharing this, but I can't complain to my husband when he's working so hard and I'm already stressed/worried enough and don't want to complain to non-pregnant friends who don't understand the anxiety of hoping my baby is okay and will stay put for at least four more weeks. Ugh.

Re: Bed Rest Woes

  • I can't imagine having to do this in the hospital, oh my gosh do I feel lucky for being released now... I thought I would work until my water broke, and I can't help but feel as though I let my bosses down, let my husband down, and like my body has let me down. It sucks, because all I have is time to sit around and think about it all. I have to say the only upside has been actually relishing in pregnancy, being able to feel every movement and see what he responds to, and see my pets react to my belly/hormones even (they definitely know their momma is pregnant). I can't believe three weeks has passed, you're definitely right about that...severe cramping and discharge this week so I have a hospital visit for monitoring, ultrasound, and another fibronectin test in the morning. Sigh, it's stressful and worrysome! At least working I was distracted from counting down days, feeling like crap, and wondering what was going to happen all the time.
  • thatgirlstefthatgirlstef
    100 Love Its 10 Comments Name Dropper Photogenic
    member
    edited April 2015
    mjschenk said:

    I have to tell you despite what anyone says you are a rockstar I can't imagine being on bed rest I would go nuts.

    You don't even know what that means. I had a "friend" say to me when I complained about my maternity disability taking so long to be approved and how broke we are currently "well you're pregnant not disabled I don't even understand why you're not working"....it's not my choice! I tried to even plead that I needed to go back to work and my midwife laughed at me. :(
  • I found out last Friday that I have an irritable uterus and have been to l&d twice now for bleeding. They just told me to take it easy, but I am beyond paranoid something is going to happen and I'll wind up on bedrest. I don't know how ya'll do it, I would seriously go crazy because I know I would just sit there worrying about everything. I'm sorry you're far away from family and close friends and feel like no one understands. I agree with @karaelaine1991 don't be shy and feel welcome to post! I think we've got a very supportive group of ladies here and you'll find yourself in good company!
    karaelaine1991KaLikeAWindthatgirlstef
  • You're doing great! And your "friend" who told you that is an asshole! I've had some complications this pregnancy too and all we can do is keep on going day by day! Not far from now we'll all be posting out cute little baby's pics!!! Keep your head up girls!!!
    knwilliams01karaelaine1991thatgirlstef
  • I also feel bad for you ladies on bedrest / hospital rest. Try not to let yourself get dragged down by feelings of boredom or guilt. You gals are all doing great. Maybe you could take an online course or something? Nothing too stressful, I'm thinking videos to learn how to knit, or something like that.

    Keep your spirits up, you're doing great!
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    knwilliams01klkonwikaraelaine1991thatgirlstef
  • thatgirlstefthatgirlstef
    100 Love Its 10 Comments Name Dropper Photogenic
    member
    edited May 2015
    foxa319 said:

    You're doing great! And your "friend" who told you that is an asshole! I've had some complications this pregnancy too and all we can do is keep on going day by day! Not far from now we'll all be posting out cute little baby's pics!!! Keep your head up girls!!!

    @foxa319 ...you know, after finding the community and opening up to my mom today while stuck in the hospital I pretty much came to the conclusion that most of my "friends" have been assholes through this. I was in the military and while normally I find straight-forwardness a good thing and love them for it, they have been just mean and made me feel like crap.

    THANK YOU to everyone for making me feel less nuts and welcomed!!  :)
    HoosOnFirstKaLikeAWindklkonwifrankengibbs
  • @karastwin & @karaelaine1991 - I had a "busy" day stuck in the hospital for another fibronectin test and other things I don't even want to think about let alone discuss yet, but you were both sooooo right, I found some boards and posts and I can't believe how much better I feel just getting this "out" to other pregnant women. I am the first in my group of friends experiencing pregnancy and to say they don't understand or even really care to is kind of an understatement (two of them NEVER want kids and have actually said they don't care/want updates/etc...so cold!). They made me feel awful through my first tri through the holidays while I was sick, gaining weight and uncomfortable about it, and trying to just figure out WHAT pregnancy was (LOL) and I feel completely forgotten now in my third tri... I had only searched out symptoms and such before and found some posts that way, I wasn't even aware the community of women here was so amazing!! I feel so lucky now to have all of you! :)

    Aww I'm so glad that this has been helpful to you! I'm also one of the first in my friend group to have kids (2 of my friends from home have some, but none of my sorority sisters do, and they're the ones who I see most often). It can be really hard to be the first, since no one else knows what it's like. But yeah I can definitely relate to that part of what you're going through! Welcome to the group! :)
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    KaLikeAWindthatgirlstef
  • I completely understand how you feel! I've been on hospital bed rest and have those same feelings and feel guilty for having them... People keep telling me how they wish they could be on bed rest and all I want to do is be at my home and back to my normal self again. It is very frustrating!

    Of course I would do anything for this little one to make sure she is healthy, but that does not mean it is not very hard to go through all this. As if pregnancy in general isn't hard enough already without all the complications...
    knwilliams01thatgirlstef
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