Alright ladies, looking for some permission here. I did a little deep googling and I think I may have found a work email address. Should I attempt to reach out?
If you found a work email, did you also find a "real life" name that could be used for a Facebook search to potentially send a personal message?
OK, if its a work email then we know the work location. I wonder if we could contact someone else there - if its a school, maybe an administrator - and just tell them that we would like to know how she is doing, but have no way to reach her. We aren't asking for contact info, but if they are in contact with her, to let her know we are concerned? I'm not sure if that is appropriate, really, either, tho. What if we ended up reaching out to a jerk admin or something? Or, if that's too stalker-ish ("we know where you work!")
I would flip out if a person from this board googled me and called my office. Seriously. I am really against this idea.
I always ask myself if my behavior is about them or about me? In this case, I do not think this is done for CillyMama. This is to allay our own concerns. The only outcome is that we get information - this is not an outcome that helps CillyMama, this is a well-meaning but ultimately selfish outcome.
Please respect this lady's privacy. She was an active member on here, and will respond when she can. We must just hope for the best.
ETA: I am against using any personal information to contact a lady outside these boards. Even if you are not calling her office, but sending an email - I think that is too far, and I personally find that a big invasion of privacy. Again, I know you mean well, and I am not judging. But I do think this crosses a major line.
I would flip out if a person from this board googled me and called my office. Seriously. I am really against this idea.
I always ask myself if my behavior is about them or about me? In this case, I do not think this is done for CillyMama. This is to allay our own concerns. The only outcome is that we get information - this is not an outcome that helps CillyMama, this is a well-meaning but ultimately selfish outcome.
Please respect this lady's privacy. She was an active member on here, and will respond when she can. We must just hope for the best.
ETA: I am against using any personal information to contact a lady outside these boards. Even if you are not calling her office, but sending an email - I think that is too far, and I personally find that a big invasion of privacy. Again, I know you mean well, and I am not judging. But I do think this crosses a major line.
Oh good someone said this! I think it's really stepping outside of normal boundaries to do this... If she wants us to have an update she will provide one!
I would flip out if a person from this board googled me and called my office. Seriously. I am really against this idea.
I always ask myself if my behavior is about them or about me? In this case, I do not think this is done for CillyMama. This is to allay our own concerns. The only outcome is that we get information - this is not an outcome that helps CillyMama, this is a well-meaning but ultimately selfish outcome.
Please respect this lady's privacy. She was an active member on here, and will respond when she can. We must just hope for the best.
ETA: I am against using any personal information to contact a lady outside these boards. Even if you are not calling her office, but sending an email - I think that is too far, and I personally find that a big invasion of privacy. Again, I know you mean well, and I am not judging. But I do think this crosses a major line.
This is kind of what i was asking. I have no intention of calling anyone btw. I just used publicly available information nothing sinister about it, and no I won't tell you how I figured it out and I could be wrong. Generally, if you connect the dots you can find people. So if this freaks any of you out, check your posts for identifying information! and google yourself! As far as being selfish...well I really don't see it that way sorry. I think people genuinely care about others on this board.
I have to say that I'm in agreement with @amark11 here. Cilly knows where we are; she will see many notes of concern and know that she's being thought of. However, this does cross over into being about us and not about her if we contact her through work or FB. Let's just give her family time, time to recover and acclimate to her new-normal. She'll be back when she's able and ready.
CillyMama, I hope you and your family are doing well!
Alright. I am understanding the general unease. So I will leave the information where I found it. Thank you for your feedback ladies. @cillymama I really do hope that all is well for you.
Also once again for those of you upset that its possible for someone to id you from a message board, I would encourage you to look over your inter-webs activity. I just did it for myself and did some of my own updating/privatizing.
Yeah, I stepped away for a minute and thought about what @amark11 said. I don't know how I would feel if things were going fine and I was contacted by a member of the board in outside life, probably not too weirded out, maybe...? But - I DO know this - if something were going unwell in my situation that caused me to be silent, I would probably not be happy about being contacted. In that case it would be because I wanted time to myself, and it would be an welcome intrusion into my solitude, and then I would probably also be mad about being hunted down, because I was cocooning myself for a reason, and people had to come and find me and get in my bubble? That would indeed make me mad.
I'm hoping that she is silent for a positive reason, and not a negative one. But, if it were a negative one, I would think she needs space and we should give it to her.
thanks to @mrswigglewaggle for looking at our options, but I've considered it more and have come around to respecting her silence.
@cillymama we hope you are well! obviously, we are thinking of you!
Yes that did get a little insane but hopefully she will realize that it only got out of hand because we care and are worried about her. Everyone on this thread had the best of intentions. Here's hoping that all is well and she can have a good laugh at our expense soon.
@CillyMama I see you went through the thread and changed the title and gave some love to our crazy shoutouts. I hope you and baby boy are doing well. We were on pins and needles around here...obviously based on our contemplation to see if you were ok by any means necessary. Thank you for checking in. If you have time we would love an update on you and LO.
Hey everyone!!! Didn't mean to leave you all hanging! I'm feeling the catfish/stalkerly love. THANK YOU!!! I truly appreciate all the concerns
So after I was admitted, things stalled for a bit. I almost kept him in there for a week! Then about mid morning yesterday I was having contractions and bleeding. I ended up with a repeat c-section. Not what I planned but I'm so happy he's doing fine it doesn't matter. He was born at 11:30am, weighs 3lbs 12.8oz and 15inches long.
Yay Caden and Momma! Love the name! Welcome to the world. Glad you were able to keep him cooking for a little longer, every day helps. Hope you are recovering well and able to get a little rest. Keep us posted on his progress. So happy for you! ❤️
Hey everyone!!! Didn't mean to leave you all hanging! I'm feeling the catfish/stalkerly love. THANK YOU!!! I truly appreciate all the concerns
So after I was admitted, things stalled for a bit. I almost kept him in there for a week! Then about mid morning yesterday I was having contractions and bleeding. I ended up with a repeat c-section. Not what I planned but I'm so happy he's doing fine it doesn't matter. He was born at 11:30am, weighs 3lbs 12.8oz and 15inches long.
Meet Caden Rhodes. This is him saying "hi!"
Welcome Caden! So, so happy you're both healthy! Rest up and enjoy the extra time with your precious little boy!
Omg such a precious babe! I hope you're feeling well after surgery... he looks good! A dear family friend had her son at 32 weeks, and he's the best looking child I've ever seen. I'll have to tell her that her son has competition. Good job and much stalkery love to you and the kiddo!
So glad to see your baby boy! Congratulations on your new arrival. So very happy for you! Sorry if we freaked you out! Glad to know he's here and things are well!
Re: Baby boy is here!!!!
I would flip out if a person from this board googled me and called my office. Seriously. I am really against this idea.
I always ask myself if my behavior is about them or about me? In this case, I do not think this is done for CillyMama. This is to allay our own concerns. The only outcome is that we get information - this is not an outcome that helps CillyMama, this is a well-meaning but ultimately selfish outcome.
Please respect this lady's privacy. She was an active member on here, and will respond when she can. We must just hope for the best.
ETA: I am against using any personal information to contact a lady outside these boards. Even if you are not calling her office, but sending an email - I think that is too far, and I personally find that a big invasion of privacy. Again, I know you mean well, and I am not judging. But I do think this crosses a major line.
Yeah, I stepped away for a minute and thought about what @amark11 said. I don't know how I would feel if things were going fine and I was contacted by a member of the board in outside life, probably not too weirded out, maybe...? But - I DO know this - if something were going unwell in my situation that caused me to be silent, I would probably not be happy about being contacted. In that case it would be because I wanted time to myself, and it would be an welcome intrusion into my solitude, and then I would probably also be mad about being hunted down, because I was cocooning myself for a reason, and people had to come and find me and get in my bubble? That would indeed make me mad.
I'm hoping that she is silent for a positive reason, and not a negative one. But, if it were a negative one, I would think she needs space and we should give it to her.
thanks to @mrswigglewaggle for looking at our options, but I've considered it more and have come around to respecting her silence.
@cillymama we hope you are well! obviously, we are thinking of you!
So after I was admitted, things stalled for a bit. I almost kept him in there for a week! Then about mid morning yesterday I was having contractions and bleeding. I ended up with a repeat c-section. Not what I planned but I'm so happy he's doing fine it doesn't matter. He was born at 11:30am, weighs 3lbs 12.8oz and 15inches long.
Meet Caden Rhodes. This is him saying "hi!"
Sorry we were almost gonna stalk you! So glad to hear that you and Caden are well! ❤
ETA best wishes for a smooth, comfortable recovery after your c-section
Oh yeah! And don't forget to post his birth on the birth announcements page!