Thoughts on circumcision

mac00127

never thought of it until I knew I was having a baby boy and would have to make that decision...I know they do it all the time but it sounds so painful and risky?! Any moms who have had boys how did you decide?

kladd7182

I have 2 boys, and I left the decision up to my husband. I wouldn't even sign for it, I made him do it.

NittanyPA

I let my husband make that decision. He said we are doing it, it's cleaner. i'm sure it probably hurts but baby will forgive us.

abbymessina

I have two boys and we chose not to cut anything off of our babies!! If god didn't intend for it to be there it wouldn't be, that's how I see it!

samanthaj0e

I work in healthcare and a lot of men get infections and have to have them removed as adults. That's a hell of a lot more painful and risky than doing it when they're an infant.

That thought is what made my decision nice and easy.

Plus I personally find foreskins kind of nasty and considering I would like grandkids someday...

asun123

It makes me really sad just thinking about it.  

My 2 year old is circumcised. And the one on the way will be getting it done too.

jesicabrennan

We decided not to. Not medically necessary so it's unnecessary. Plus my husband is British and thinks the whole American concept of all boys getting circumcised is weird.

erinkaydonnell

I think the foreskin is like our appendix or tail bone the used to serve a purpose but now they get in the way some times

sschwege

I think my main fear would be our son being in a situation where he had to do it later in life, that would be awful!  Plus you hear stories about men ending up in nursing homes and the caretakers being unable/unwilling to clean down there properly and it turning into an infection.  There are benefits and risks involved and no right or wrong answer here.  The AAP stance was a factor in our decision they state:
"After a comprehensive review of the
scientific evidence, the American Academy of Pediatrics found the health
benefits of newborn male circumcision outweigh the risks, but the
benefits are not great enough to recommend universal newborn
circumcision." 

https://www.aap.org/en-us/about-the-aap/aap-press-room/pages/Newborn-Male-Circumcision.aspx

It wasn't an easy decision, while I voiced my opinion I decided to leave the final call up to DH.  I figured if there was something involving female anatomy I would want the final say.  So we did circumcise DS and will again if this baby is a boy.

@kladd7182 you are lucky your hospital would allow you not to sign it.  With our son DH reached for the paper and the doctor said, "No, only the mother can sign it."  It was sad to sign that paper and know that it was only my signature on there  

beeish

My son was not circumcised. By age three he started to have problems. He was circumcised at age three and it was a horrible experience. I wish I would have gotten it done at the hospital. Round two is a girl but if I were to have another boy I would definitely get it done.

mom3babies

I left the decision up to my husband with our first son. He got it done and this LO will have it done too. It's not about the whole cleaning part for me. I don't have a problem cleaning it myself but not every single kid is going to clean it like its supposed to and I don't want him to have to get it done later in life.

looneyru

We will be having this little guy circumcised. I feel like it's cleaner and we are Jewish. So we are religiously mandated to do it.

lindsaypkelly

I don't have a son and I'm expecting a girl. BUT I do work in a nursing home and we have a lot of issues with foreskin. A lot of times we will pull it back to clean underneath and it's extremely difficult to get it back into place.

I also find foreskins kind of weird haha

chanielle14

My husband is not, my son isn't either. Having my next two sons I absolutely will not do it. I'm not causing unnecessary pain to my child. My husband and I teach our son every day how to clean himself because we are aware of what may happen if not properly taken care of. This is all just my opinion on it. I work in an urgent care and men who are circumcised, if they aren't very cleanly, are not completely problem free.

blukats

This will be baby boy 2 for us and we did it with our first son and will with this one as well. It was quick and we have had no problems with that area at all.

erinnlou

We circumcised our first. However, I feel we weren't very well educated on the subject. This time around, I would like to keep our son intact.

ETA I did a lot of research on both sides. And there isn't anything that states circumcision is medically necessary. Many other countries in Europe do not circumcise. I feel it's not necessary to put my son through that pain, so I won't. Not being circumcised is something that they can change in the future if they choose. But there's no undoing a circumcision.

grlplz

While it does hurt them they don't remember it. I did for both my boys even though I had to pay for it out of pocket (my insurance won't cover it because it's not medically necessary). I was nervous that they'd be that 1 in a million who have some sort of problem because of it but it came down to the odds of something going wrong is greater in an uncircumcised boy (I mean in the cleanliness and infection area) and I would hate for him to have life long complications or have to have it removed later in life. Also, please don't hate because it wasn't the deciding factor but it was something I thought about, kids can be assholes and someday they are going to be in a locker room or at a urinal and I'd hate for them to feel bad about themselves just because of something like that.

sschwege

The circumcision rate in the US has been on the decline and I think is at just over 50% currently.  So really, from an aesthetic standpoint when our sons go to school it should be pretty well split.

AmommyB

Before we knew the gender I asked my sis and bff (both who are health care providers ) and they both full heartedly supported having it done. Another poster brought up the event of a child having to get it done later in life and how painful and memorable it was. I know each side has some good points but if we were to ever have a boy we would have him circumsized.

werhanee

What kind of anesthesia do they use when u have done w a newborn?

sschwege

werhanee said:

What kind of anesthesia do they use when u have done w a newborn?

Depends on the person doing it.  I've seen it done in a Jewish ceremony, they only gave the baby a sponge with wine to suck on.  My SIL who is a pedi said the first hospital she worked at only did a paci with sugar water to keep the baby distracted.  My hospital numbs the area, which is good, but they still have to use a needle to numb it which I'm sure is unpleasant.  DS seemed to do well after though, just slept.

shakirahb

His dad and I have decided on the circumcision. I'd rather have him get it done during infancy (he won't even remember the pain) than waiting years later when a problem can occur.

NewMumzy25

My man and I decided on getting our little man due July 3rd circumcised

rnasir

In our culture, it's kind of a mandatory thing ( only for boys) and we also say the Aazaan or the Muslim call to prayer in the baby's ear(both sexes). It is also traditional to wet the baby's mouth with a crushed date (both sexes). The earlier it's done means less pain and less memory of the pain. So if my baby is a boy we will definitely get it done. Mostly Jewish doctors and/or Muslim doctors would perform this.

gotdiesel2007

Husband is not both my boys are and so will this one. I left the choice up to DH since he has one and that is what he chose.

qtjo5

rnasir said:

In our culture, it's kind of a mandatory thing ( only for boys) and we also say the Aazaan or the Muslim call to prayer in the baby's ear(both sexes). It is also traditional to wet the baby's mouth with a crushed date (both sexes). The earlier it's done means less pain and less memory of the pain. So if my baby is a boy we will definitely get it done. Mostly Jewish doctors and/or Muslim doctors would perform this.

We are Muslim so for this reason we will have it done, too.

mnj05

They can't do anesthesia in the traditional sense before 6 months of age. Most hospitals give babies sucrose (sugar water) on the tongue which distracts them from the pain going on. The nurses at my hospital said they see so many not even shed a tear over it.

We had it done with DS and will with this one too. DS had an issue with not enough skin on the under side of his penis so he needed it to help that issue anyway.

gatormom73

If I were having a boy I would have it done!

gatormom73

I know someone personally that his mom didnt have him circumcised as a baby, he said he was made fun of and embarrassed. When he turned 17 he decided to get it done he said it was so painful and that he hated that his mom didn't do it while he was a baby.

ToAoShesha

When I discussed it with my dr, they said either way is fine and healthy.  They recommended that baby be like daddy.  They will grow up seeing daddy and learning to be like daddy they will want to be the same as daddy.  They may wonder why they are different from daddy. 

mrsrep123

ToAoShesha said:

When I discussed it with my dr, they said either way is fine and healthy.  They recommended that baby be like daddy.  They will grow up seeing daddy and learning to be like daddy they will want to be the same as daddy.  They may wonder why they are different from daddy. 

This makes sense @ToAoShesha

ChristyM87

ToAoShesha said:

When I discussed it with my dr, they said either way is fine and healthy.  They recommended that baby be like daddy.  They will grow up seeing daddy and learning to be like daddy they will want to be the same as daddy.  They may wonder why they are different from daddy. 

I hear this argument a lot but this always sounds weak to me. If daddy doesn't have his tonsils or is missing his big toe you wouldn't say that a Don should look like daddy. This is something that your son will live with his whole life, sounds too important of a decision to leave to what looks better

kleinjm1

I talked to DH since I don't have one...I have never even seen one uncircumcised so I took his opinion pretty seriously. He said 100% he wants to do it and is glad he had it done as a baby. After some discussion mostly me asking questions, we are decided on doing it.

ksdphillips

I was told it was recommended for baby to be like daddy, DH is so our first son is and this one will be as well. It hurt my heart but he didn't even cry our friends son had to have it done at 4, and it was an excruciating experience for him and his parents.

sarahsairsair

Wow, I thought this thread would blow up- but it's been pretty restrained so far

Where we live- only one dr will do it- he makes you watch a online slideshow which shows both sides of the argument before you can book your appointment, he will only do it at certain ages and with pain relief.
There's a lot to consider- I had a cousin who needed it done at 11 yo and my aunt said it was awful- she is a nurse and said if she had her time over she would have had it done at newborn.
My mother was a nurse and she said about when he is old and cleaning/infections.
DH read some research that said it lowers risk of some STI's
So weighing it all up- we did it, I cried the whole time and felt like I betrayed my baby- but he wasn't worried at all

Thera888

We have been talking about this but haven't made any decision. Daddy got circumsised when he was 15 (by his own choice) next few days after that probably was one of the worst ones in his life.. But he have never ever regretted this decision. In the place he grew up it gets done to almost all boys, but his parents wanted to give him possibility to choose for himself. The place I'm coming from is completely different story.. Some would say it's child abuse.. Personally I don't have any opinion on it..can't really say that I have been cleaning or not cleaning any foreskins so daddy will make decision on this one.

travelmama

We do not plan on having our son circumsized. Having done a lot of reading about the benefits and about the procedure itself I cannot in good conscience do that to anyone without their permission. My husband, (who is a scientist) originally disagreed with me but after looking through the medical evidence he also decided that if we espouse that our children have control of their bodies then we must allow for that to begin at birth. We feel that there is not a compelling enough health reason for us to compromise on our morals in terms of body ownership.

GSUDavis

I also left it up to DH. He is very adamant about having done. 

erinnlou - If you don't circumcise your second son, are you worried that your boys will "compare" later in life and that one might be resentful of you or the other? It might not even be an issue, but that was the first thing that came to mind for me.

erinnlou

@GSUDavis Honestly that is something that really worried me at first. But after talking to a lot of different people on forums who have been through the same experience, they said that their children rarely notice the difference. Boys don't necessarily go around comparing their penises with each other. If it is ever questioned why one looks different than the other, then I will explain that 1) everyone looks different and 2) I made the decision that I thought was best for each of them at that time.
And since I feel it's the best decision for my son, I don't want to base the decision on the aesthetic appearance.
I'm honestly more afraid that my first son will resent me for having him circumcised. That's why I'd really rather leave that choice to my next one.

GSUDavis

erinnlou said:

@GSUDavis Honestly that is something that really worried me at first. But after talking to a lot of different people on forums who have been through the same experience, they said that their children rarely notice the difference. Boys don't necessarily go around comparing their penises with each other. If it is ever questioned why one looks different than the other, then I will explain that 1) everyone looks different and 2) I made the decision that I thought was best for each of them at that time.
And since I feel it's the best decision for my son, I don't want to base the decision on the aesthetic appearance.
I'm honestly more afraid that my first son will resent me for having him circumcised. That's why I'd really rather leave that choice to my next one.

That's good enough for me. =D Totally a personal decision. I have to say though, that I'm glad you've done the research on it and have a good knowledge base to go forward on, instead of just being like "cause I want to!" lol 

asun123

I am totally into teaching your kids that every penis looks different and every vagina looks different. 

Not even every circumcision comes out looking the same. 

 Even though I will be getting my son circumcised, I don't ever want him to judge.