this is a thread about two year olds

credcat7

sammie has officially started being willfull. What do you all do when the kids ignore you when you talk? do you repeat yourself a million times? Do you make them look at you (and when you do that do they drop their chins and peer at you through their bangs like sammie??) I feel like just recently she has started this. I know "the terrible twos" and all these growth changes are going to happen... I am just curious what your methods are. All in all shes a pretty damn good kid, I can't complain, but so.annoying.to.be.ignored.

[Deleted User]

Reset button is great. We would remove whatever is distracting him from paying attention. Or if he just refused to acknowledge, we would have a change of scenery- pick him up and sit him down in the den, for example. I would sit at his level and talk with him. He could resume play when he would respond/acknowledge.

And then pour more wine.

nunzchucks

Same as @rvasc‌. Choices have worked wonders for us even over simple things like choosing socks for the day. Most of the time she ignores us because she's totally engrossed in an activity. The only time we require eye contact is during a disciplinary moment.

carrotcake06

I forget exactly when we started this w my oldest, but we used timers a lot to transition between activities. It helped avoid meltdowns and let him know what to expect.

bumpuser1691848

CTGirl30 said:

sammie has officially started being willfull. What do you all do when the kids ignore you when you talk? do you repeat yourself a million times? Do you make them look at you (and when you do that do they drop their chins and peer at you through their bangs like sammie??) I feel like just recently she has started this. I know "the terrible twos" and all these growth changes are going to happen... I am just curious what your methods are. All in all shes a pretty damn good kid, I can't complain, but so.annoying.to.be.ignored.

I do not repeat myself 1,000 times. Get to their level, get their attention on you (gently touch their shoulder, for example) and clearly say what you need to. Anyone will tune you out if you become a broken record. 1-2-3 Magic & How to Talk So Kids Will Listen are big hits around here.

Exactly this.

2 year olds are a pain, but they're still better than 4 year olds.

MrsT0514

You have all my sorries @credcat7‌. My kid turns 2 next month and has already started with the super willful "I'll do what I want!" Type behavior. He'll literally tune me right out OR he'll turn and acknowledge me, smile deviously, and then continue doing whatever he's doing. It can be downright infuriating.

I second what @CTGirl30‌ said about getting down to their level. I usually need to do that to make sure he actually listens (even then it doesn't always make him do what I need him to!). Also, what @DC2London‌ said about adding "thank you" to the end of things (ie "No, we DO NOT pull on the Christmas lights, thank you"). I started doing this a while ago (and at this point I do it subconsciously!) And sometimes it does help.

Either way, I'll be stalking this thread for replies...bc I could use the help too!

MrsT0514

@ScoutNumbers05‌ Yeah, as a mom of a boy (soon to be 2 of them, oh fuck!), I'm wondering how toddler/preschool years are goong to pan out for us. now that we are quickly approaching 2, it seems like the crazy switch suddenly flipped and he went from being my sweet, angelic little baby to a damn crazy toddler (although I have to say he still has plenty of sweet moments along with the crazy ones). But holy fuck...where does the energy come from???

MrsT0514

ScoutNumbers05 said:

I read somewhere that kids tend to have asshole phases either at their birthdays or at the six month mark after the birthdays. Some developmental something or other.

That's held very true for us, my kids are in sweet phases during birthdays, but when we hit the x age and half mark, BOOM.

Jerk city.

We're finding this to be fairly accurate too. Except...its more around the birthday, so far. He'll be 2 next month and its like the monster switch got switched on!

dovetail223

I'm screwed. My 14 mo old is willful and crazzzzyyyy energetic already. I'll be taking booze recommendations now please.

credcat7

nellybluthredux said:

I make sure she is looking at me when I ask her to do something. i don't call to her from another room, and if she is resistant, I take her arm gently and lead her to what I want her to do or where I want her to be. If something is being a distraction, like the TV, it's turned off.

When she complies without having to be lead, she gets a lot of praise. If I have to lead her, I still praise her for doing what I asked, but it's more along the lines of, "next time I would like you to do it on your own. Can you do that?"

I also have her in the habit of answering me, "okay mommy" when I ask her to do something. I always thank her for answering me, too. She thrives on praise.

I get her to reply with " I listening mommy" ....when I praise her for "listening with her ears:

MrsT0514

@SunnySideUp26‌ this where we're at right now. I definitely think some of the behavior-related frustration comes from DS being a bit speech delayed. Even though he understands pretty much everything we tell him, and does a pretty darn good job communicating his needs with other nonverbal cues, his expressive language is delayed (which he starts ST for next week-woohoo!), so I think he gets frustrated by not being able to actually tell us when he wants/needs with words.

I'm look I forward to when he's able to start using words to communicate. Bc damn...its hardhaving to be a mind reader!

Eta..your ds sounds a lot like my ds! Also with being cooped up in the house...Doesnt usually fare well for us. Hes goes NUTS with cabin fever (totally takes after me there). My kid is the type thats content even just going out to thw grocery store. As long we get out of the house, he's good.