Making the decision to become a SAHM

wendyneilson

Hi guys,

I'm thinking about becoming a SAHM. And really actually leaning towards it. (I'm due in April) However, my biggest concerns are:

1. My current employer terminating my contract when I tell them. I would like my benefits and disability to continue through the end of my contract. My contract doesn't expire until August and I'm a school employee so my maternity leave will keep me out until next school year regardless of whether or not I return, but I'm an at-will employee so technically they can cancel it at any time.

2. Burning a bridge if I don't tell them until the last minute in order to keep my contract afloat... When I told one of the directors I was pregnant, she asked me to let them know if I'm not coming back so they have ample time to fill my position. I also know people who left abruptly for new positions and it left a sour taste in the employer's mouth, however I want to keep the relationship good in case I want to try to come back in the future. 

3. Losing my position - I really enjoy the position I'm in. It's very unique and the only one in my network. I know that if I leave I probably won't get it back unless they decide to add a new, similar position at that time or the person they replace me with is really horrible (not likely).  But I also know that I'll regret not taking the opportunity to stay home. And I'm not sure in the long run I'd be doing this forever anyway.. but still it's nerve-wrecking to give up the sense of security to have a job that I mostly enjoy.

I'd love some advice if anyone has grappled with this decision themselves or had a similar situation. 

angelsnight

I can't answer your questions about your contract, but I advise that you wait until your baby is born and you've been home with him or her for a bit. You may find that you don't like staying home and look forward to going back, or you may decide that you really love being home and want to continue. Then you can give notice and you won't have been dishonest because it is so hard to say what you want to do until you do it. I never thought I'd want to be a SAHM, but once LO was here, I realized how much I wanted to be one.

I had three months ML, went back for two months and then quit. Of course I wished I could be home with her during those two months, but it gave me a chance to try working and let me see that I was making the right decision, and I don't feel as though those two months away from her while I worked made a huge impact.