March 2013 Moms

20 month old and cancer

Hi ladies first time posting on this group but I have an almost 20 month old which I am sure most of ypu do. He will be on the 7th of Novemver. I am 23 years old and they found cysts on my ovaries. My mother was 26 when she had ovarian cancer. I have another appointment to talk about my options my doctor wants me to get a hysterectomy. I always wanted 6 kids and now my not be able to have any more. Just a few months ago my fiance and I were talking about trying for another. We are considering adoption but that cost a lot.
Also with chemotherapy I am feeling like I will be to tired to handle my son. Just feeling overwhelmed.
I tried talking to my mother who by the time she was 31 had breast cancer twice and ovarian cancer. Chemo all three times. Two masectomys, and a hysterectomy. She said I didn't need to have anymore kids. Like really that isn't the only thing I am worried about. I was young and I seen how exhausted my mom was. How she missed important things in my life. I don't want that for my son.
I know people probably say this all the time but I am only 23, I am to young to have cancer. I feel like my sons childhood is being taken away from me. Sorry for the depressing woe me I just need someone who is supportive.

Re: 20 month old and cancer

  • I'm so sorry to hear that you're going through this. :(
  • I'm so sorry to hear about your struggles.  I sort of know how you feel. A few months ago, I was misdiagnosed with an autoimmune disease that would have made me unable to carry another child.  More so than my disappointment for not being able to have another child was my disappointment in not giving my son a sibling.  People reminded me that I was lucky to have one healthy child and that my biggest personal priority was to stay healthy for him.

    I'm not sure what the costs are, but is freezing your eggs an option?  Even if having a surrogate is cost-prohibitive at this point in your life, you may be able to save to make it happen in a few years?  And someone in your life may step up and offer to be your surrogate.  My 54 yo mom offered to be mine.

    I am so sorry that you are dealing with this, especially at such a young age.  :(

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