♥♥♥AMA Check-in 10/12♥♥♥

rubysi

Hello everyone,

This check-in is for Sunday, October 12th, 2014

This is my first time as your check in leader. I have some wonderful shoes to fill. @buggirl72 Thank you for all of your support.

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No new members

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No BFP's

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This is a check-in designed for us that are AMA (35+) and dealing with that added challenge in our TTCAL journeys. Please feel free to share your insights, vents, thoughts, and anything else. Mostly this check-in is to remind all of us that we are not alone and to offer support to each other. Check in every other  Friday. New members: Post an introduction and your current TTC status and I will add you to the list! Welcome  Current members: Post your updates, link to your chart, upcoming appointments, and if you get a BFP, please PM me! If you get a BFP and do not PM me,  I will not post your BFP in the check-in.

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Current Members:

@bookishmama

@buggirl72

@clh4444

@dajhughes

@furrypaws

@gscoville

@HeyMrsPotter

@HoldingOutHope

@jenwashington

@katib77

@kboydbowman

@lesliem0901

@meredithcarole

@O2girl

@rubysi

@scrang74

@sunflwra

@Tablefor5

@tlc35

@VesperLynch

@yellowcat10

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Please provide an update on how you are and what’s going in your life. 

To anyone who missed last week’s check-in: how are you? 

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meredithcarole

Hi @rubysi! Thanks for running the check in!

I am....I don't know. Fretting? Nervous? Reading too much into things? I was all stressed out since I O'd late (cd19). My last 3 cycles have been 26 days and last month 27. That would give me all of a 8 day LP. So when my temp dropped a bit yesterday and I had a little spotting mid day I thought - yep, here we go....but nothing else has happened. My temp is about the same today (cd29) and there is no more spotting. I am obsessively looking for signs of AF. I am only 10 DPO (unless I O'd on cd17 as mlal thinks I might have) so I guess I will test tomorrow. I am kind of sick to my stomach thinking about it. I really thought this cycle was a bust, and now I am either going to be right and truly devastated by an additional 24-48 hours of false hope or.... I am not sure I am ready to think about the other possibility.

rubysi

meredithcarole said:

Hi @rubysi! Thanks for running the check in!

I am....I don't know. Fretting? Nervous? Reading too much into things? I was all stressed out since I O'd late (cd19). My last 3 cycles have been 26 days and last month 27. That would give me all of a 8 day LP. So when my temp dropped a bit yesterday and I had a little spotting mid day I thought - yep, here we go....but nothing else has happened. My temp is about the same today (cd29) and there is no more spotting. I am obsessively looking for signs of AF. I am only 10 DPO (unless I O'd on cd17 as mlal thinks I might have) so I guess I will test tomorrow. I am kind of sick to my stomach thinking about it. I really thought this cycle was a bust, and now I am either going to be right and truly devastated by an additional 24-48 hours of false hope or.... I am not sure I am ready to think about the other possibility.

****Breathe****

I am not a charting expert. I do know sometimes we ovulate at different times. Remember your not out until the witch shows her ugly mug. ((Big hugs))

sunflwra

Hi ladies!!  Been away a while, so I hope everyone is doing well   Thanks @rubysi for the check-in- hope you are doing well!

@meredithcarole - Fingers crossed for you- I'm sure this 2WW is so stressful!

AFM:  Waiting for the next cycle to start (I'm guessing by Mon/Tues) and then hoping that the final testing for my husband comes back on the shorter end of what they are estimating.  I really don't expect any results for him that would affect our plan (just confirming if he's a recessive carrier for the same things I am which could cause an issue) but we want to be sure and I'm guessing they will come in right around O. I so hope we don't miss out on this month by 1-2 days.  I'm excited and terrified to start trying again but I feel a little more comfortable feeling like we have a good plan in place.

Hope everyone has a wonderful week!

Tablefor5

Hey ladies. I've been away for awhile. September was my loss month and birthday month. My nerves were so shot I made myself very sick. I didn't expect to fall into a mourning mode like I did. I lost 10lbs. because of it. Not the best way to do that. I'm feeling better now and keeping busy. Friends are hitting me up to sew costumes so thats keeping me a little busy.

Currently on cd10 of a monitored (100mg) Clomid cycle.

Missed you guys ((hugs))

sunflwra

@furrypaws - good luck with the HSG hon and I totally understand having a husband who has a hard time sharing feelings.  While I appreciate the fact that I feel like it's sometimes twice as hard on them because so many men feel like they have to help us get through it before they can deal with any of their own feelings- the fact that he hasn't gotten the karyotyping done yet would seriously irritate me too.

I do know that my DH though also didn't want to have a full on "decision" type conversation until we had whatever test results that we were going to have in place.  None of it gave us much to work with, but he didn't see the point in having stressful conversations about some of this stuff until we had all of the information.  While I understand it, it's still frustrating.  All of that to say, that I understand what you are going through.  Let us know how things go on Thursday!

sunflwra

Oh and @furrypaws - Walking Dead tonight- WOOHOOO!!!!

rubysi

sunflwra said:

Hi ladies!!  Been away a while, so I hope everyone is doing well   Thanks @rubysi for the check-in- hope you are doing well!

@meredithcarole - Fingers crossed for you- I'm sure this 2WW is so stressful!

AFM:  Waiting for the next cycle to start (I'm guessing by Mon/Tues) and then hoping that the final testing for my husband comes back on the shorter end of what they are estimating.  I really don't expect any results for him that would affect our plan (just confirming if he's a recessive carrier for the same things I am which could cause an issue) but we want to be sure and I'm guessing they will come in right around O. I so hope we don't miss out on this month by 1-2 days.  I'm excited and terrified to start trying again but I feel a little more comfortable feeling like we have a good plan in place.

Hope everyone has a wonderful week!

Welcome back. I am glad you have a plan in place and I hope you dh results come back soon and with the answers you want. FX the timing will work out. 

rubysi

furrypaws said:

Hi lady! @rubysi :-h Thanks for taking over for our beautiful bug!

I'm kind of meh-tastic today. I have not had any luck getting my DH to open up. He said it's up to me...WTF. I got mad and finally said something to the effect of 'I deserve to know how you are feeling about moving forward'. He mumbled about and said 'let's see what the test Thursday shows'. I'm getting my HSG Thursday. I was just so irritated I said fine. But I expect to hear what he thinks and how he feels about everything Thursday evening. I want to know either way...does he want to try again or not.

Just typing this out is making me angrier at him...blah. Is he scared? Is he emotionally done? IDK...why the fuck can't he just tell me.... ~X(   Oh, and he still hasn't gotten is karyotype testing done...it's been over a month now...WTF.

So, HSG Thursday late morning for me.

Walking Dead tonight...at least I have that to look forward too. 8-X

EDIT:::Just spoke w/ DH...I got somewhere this time...finally...What a freaking weirdo...anyway, he says that yes he does want a child. Yes he wants to try again but that it is harder on me and seems to be more concerned with my state of mind.

I feel better. I feel like just snuggling up with him and never letting go.


@sunflwra Glad to have you back hun! So happy for you to start trying again!

@meredithcarole Deep breaths sweetie!

Your DH sounds a lot like mine. I think they believe it reduces our stress by not providing answers. What they need to know very little relieves our stress. I am glad you got to a snuggley place. Let us know how the hsg goes.

rubysi

Tablefor5 said:

Hey ladies. I've been away for awhile. September was my loss month and birthday month. My nerves were so shot I made myself very sick. I didn't expect to fall into a mourning mode like I did. I lost 10lbs. because of it. Not the best way to do that. I'm feeling better now and keeping busy. Friends are hitting me up to sew costumes so thats keeping me a little busy. Currently on cd10 of a monitored (100mg) Clomid cycle. Missed you guys ((hugs))

I am so sorry last month was so rough. I am glad my favorite holiday is providing a distraction. I only make 1-2 costumes a year... DH doesn't always dress up. Sending you uber follies hopes. ((Hugs))

meredithcarole

@rubysi and @furrypaws‌ I'm working on that. The Benedict Cumberbatch gif helped . God, this process is such a mind fuck. Furrypaws, I am glad you got somewhere with YH. They are funny in the way they approach these things.

@sunflwra‌ it's good to see you :-h

@Tablefor5‌ glad you are doing better this month.

rubysi

HoldingOutHope said:

Hi, ladies! Thanks for taking over the check-in for Bug, rubysi.

Tomorrow afternoon I have my consult with my new RE. That's about all the TTCAL news I have right now.

NTTCALR, we're still slowly getting the new house put together. I've started running again, which is a nice addition to my exercise routine. I actually hate running, but it's good for me, so...whatever. I'm trying to live life again as though I am not KTFU and won't be anytime soon. I realized that the last 2+ years since my first loss, I've been so focused on trying to plan things around theoretical pregnancies, and it's time to stop living like that.

Big (((hugs))) to all who need them, ladies. I hope you all have a great week.

It sounds like things are falling into place. I tried running, I hated it. I need to work on trying again. Let us know how the new RE consult goes.

buggirl72

Hi rubysi! Thank you for taking over the check in!

@meredithcarole - a later O is not necessarily a bad thing. Progressively earlier O's can be a sign that your reserve is dwindling and can raise concerns for egg quality (like a CD8 O date) so, again, try not to worry about your O date being a few days later than your average. FX for you!

@sunflwra - I hope you get those test results in quickly and they show your H is not a carrier also.

@furrypaws - ((((Hugs)))) and I'm glad he finally opened up. Good luck with your HSG on Thursday.

@HoldingOutHope - Good luck today! I hope you love the new RE! Good luck with the running - I'm not a big fan of it either but I know that it is good for me. Right now, I'm trying to be more consistent on my daily walking and then I'll add running back in.

@Tablefor5 - (((Hugs))). Make sure you are still taking care of yourself and I hope you are feeling better. Keeping yourself occupied is a good thing.  I love making costumes! Share pics if you can!

AFM - My latest lab results are available on my online portal. FSH came in over 40 and LH came in at 14.9  - that would be sort of okay if I was around CD14 or so but since I was only CD3, not so good. Both numbers are in post menopause range. My doctor also redid the cancer markers and they both came in normal limits. The problem with my hormone levels is that they don't fit with what my body is doing. If I am post-menopause then I should have had a year without cycles. I have not even had a month without a cycle. So, I'm back to keeping track of everything and seeing the doc for a follow-up in 3 months.

On the non-TTCAL side of things, I finally got in to see a new dermatologist. This is a fairly big deal for me since I've had a rosacea dx for about 15 years now. When I moved to AZ, the derm there told me the type of rosacea I had could not be treated with medicine and that I would just need to do laser treatments (which I never did because those are not covered by insurance). Needless to say, in the past 5 years of zero medicine, my rosacea has gone insane and I know have damage that can only be treated by a laser. Thanks AZ doc. The new doctor here is wonderful. She put me on low dose doxycycline indefinitely, and two different topical creams. We at least will get it back under control. 

Since I was a new patient, I also got a free full body screen (apparently, I really cannot say no to free things).  I've never had one and being a child of the 70s, I have a history of severe sunburns and a childhood without sunscreen. She ended up removing two moles that she did not like. She shaved them off. This would not be so bad accept both of them are in places that I cannot see on my own - my upper back and the back of my upper thigh. Ever try putting a bandaid on something that you can't see unless you are looking over your shoulder in a mirror? Not fun. Good thing Mr. Bug is a trooper and is willing to doctor my "wounds"

rubysi

buggirl72 said:

Hi rubysi! Thank you for taking over the check in!

@meredithcarole - a later O is not necessarily a bad thing. Progressively earlier O's can be a sign that your reserve is dwindling and can raise concerns for egg quality (like a CD8 O date) so, again, try not to worry about your O date being a few days later than your average. FX for you!

@sunflwra - I hope you get those test results in quickly and they show your H is not a carrier also.

@furrypaws - ((((Hugs)))) and I'm glad he finally opened up. Good luck with your HSG on Thursday.

@HoldingOutHope - Good luck today! I hope you love the new RE! Good luck with the running - I'm not a big fan of it either but I know that it is good for me. Right now, I'm trying to be more consistent on my daily walking and then I'll add running back in.

@Tablefor5 - (((Hugs))). Make sure you are still taking care of yourself and I hope you are feeling better. Keeping yourself occupied is a good thing.  I love making costumes! Share pics if you can!

AFM - My latest lab results are available on my online portal. FSH came in over 40 and LH came in at 14.9  - that would be sort of okay if I was around CD14 or so but since I was only CD3, not so good. Both numbers are in post menopause range. My doctor also redid the cancer markers and they both came in normal limits. The problem with my hormone levels is that they don't fit with what my body is doing. If I am post-menopause then I should have had a year without cycles. I have not even had a month without a cycle. So, I'm back to keeping track of everything and seeing the doc for a follow-up in 3 months.

On the non-TTCAL side of things, I finally got in to see a new dermatologist. This is a fairly big deal for me since I've had a rosacea dx for about 15 years now. When I moved to AZ, the derm there told me the type of rosacea I had could not be treated with medicine and that I would just need to do laser treatments (which I never did because those are not covered by insurance). Needless to say, in the past 5 years of zero medicine, my rosacea has gone insane and I know have damage that can only be treated by a laser. Thanks AZ doc. The new doctor here is wonderful. She put me on low dose doxycycline indefinitely, and two different topical creams. We at least will get it back under control. 

Since I was a new patient, I also got a free full body screen (apparently, I really cannot say no to free things).  I've never had one and being a child of the 70s, I have a history of severe sunburns and a childhood without sunscreen. She ended up removing two moles that she did not like. She shaved them off. This would not be so bad accept both of them are in places that I cannot see on my own - my upper back and the back of my upper thigh. Ever try putting a bandaid on something that you can't see unless you are looking over your shoulder in a mirror? Not fun. Good thing Mr. Bug is a trooper and is willing to doctor my "wounds"

Did the dr have any idea why your numbers are so high even though you are cycling? I hope on your 3 month appointment the mystery will be solved.

I am glad to hear you have found a new dermatologist that is working for you. I hope the medication will help. This reminds me I should make an appointment, I was burnt almost continuously during my youth. My mother believed baby oil was what you needed to go out into the sun.

And if the dh wasn't there to put bandages in awkward places what would be the point?

tlc35

Hi Ladies,
@rubysi thanks for taking over the checkin
@meredithcarole your chart looks pretty good but I get how you don't want to get your hopes up
@sunflwra I hope the results come in soon so it won't affect this cycle.
@HoldingoutHope good luck at your RE appointment
@furrypaws I am glad your H is finally opening up a little bit
@tablefor5 I'm sorry your EDD month was so hard (I am scared that mine is coming up) but am glad you are feeling better now
@buggirl72 I'm sorry your labs weren't good and your body is confusing.  I am glad your new dermatologist is awesome.

AFM: We finally had sex last night!  I was so excited.  My temps indicated I haven't O'd yet and I had a darker line on an OPK yesterday afternoon (but not an actual +) but my cervix is low and firm this AM so I'm not sure what is going on.  I guess I just have to wait it out.  We went to my parent's house last weekend and took a little outing on my Dad's sailboat which was nice.  This weekend MIL and FIL are visiting and the next week is my first RE appointment so lots coming up here.

buggirl72

rubysi said:

*snip*

Did the dr have any idea why your numbers are so high even though you are cycling? I hope on your 3 month appointment the mystery will be solved.

I am glad to hear you have found a new dermatologist that is working for you. I hope the medication will help. This reminds me I should make an appointment, I was burnt almost continuously during my youth. My mother believed baby oil was what you needed to go out into the sun.

And if the dh wasn't there to put bandages in awkward places what would be the point?

The doctor is worried about cancer. So far, other than what would be considered abnormal bleeding if I am post-menopausal (which he is convinced that I am), I have no symptoms.  The endometrial biopsy he did in August came back fine and the cancer markers he checked then were normal. I got the feeling that he really was leaning more towards some sort of surgery in January to check things out over another biopsy. We shall see.

rubysi

tlc35 said:

Hi Ladies,
@rubysi thanks for taking over the checkin
@meredithcarole your chart looks pretty good but I get how you don't want to get your hopes up
@sunflwra I hope the results come in soon so it won't affect this cycle.
@HoldingoutHope good luck at your RE appointment
@furrypaws I am glad your H is finally opening up a little bit
@tablefor5 I'm sorry your EDD month was so hard (I am scared that mine is coming up) but am glad you are feeling better now
@buggirl72 I'm sorry your labs weren't good and your body is confusing.  I am glad your new dermatologist is awesome.

AFM: We finally had sex last night!  I was so excited.  My temps indicated I haven't O'd yet and I had a darker line on an OPK yesterday afternoon (but not an actual +) but my cervix is low and firm this AM so I'm not sure what is going on.  I guess I just have to wait it out.  We went to my parent's house last weekend and took a little outing on my Dad's sailboat which was nice.  This weekend MIL and FIL are visiting and the next week is my first RE appointment so lots coming up here.

Wow that is alot going on. It sounds like you are close to O. Good luck with the RE appointment and keep us updated.

rubysi

buggirl72 said:

rubysi said:

*snip*

Did the dr have any idea why your numbers are so high even though you are cycling? I hope on your 3 month appointment the mystery will be solved.

I am glad to hear you have found a new dermatologist that is working for you. I hope the medication will help. This reminds me I should make an appointment, I was burnt almost continuously during my youth. My mother believed baby oil was what you needed to go out into the sun.

And if the dh wasn't there to put bandages in awkward places what would be the point?

The doctor is worried about cancer. So far, other than what would be considered abnormal bleeding if I am post-menopausal (which he is convinced that I am), I have no symptoms.  The endometrial biopsy he did in August came back fine and the cancer markers he checked then were normal. I got the feeling that he really was leaning more towards some sort of surgery in January to check things out over another biopsy. We shall see.

I am glad your Dr is taking care if you. I am not sure what the best scenero would be but I wish you luck and lots of hugs.

rubysi

mlal78 said:

Hi ldies!  Thanks for taking over the check in Rubysi.

Not too much going on with me.  I started femara this cycle and am hoping that this will do the trick for me.  I have two doses left and then the EOD bd starts.  Unfortunately, dh is going to be away next weekend which is going to put a huge kink in things, so I am just keeping my fx that a Thursday night and Sunday night bd will be enough if O happens during that time.

How has the femara been treating you? FX Thursday or Sunday is the right day. Are you being monitored? 

yellowcat10

Hi everyone and thanks @rubysi for taking over the check-in.  We just got back home from a 5 hour drive after a visit with my family so I am a little fried.  My younger sister is getting married and I went with her to check out venues for a New Year's eve wedding, which I think will be an amazing time.  We also spent yesterday at a winery/grown-up cider place for another sister's birthday so a fairly relaxing good time.

I think I am getting out of my funk, but did have several "I want to punch ANYONE in the face" moments this weekend.  After talking with the RE and insurance it was decided (not by me) to do one more IUI before moving to IVF.  This time around I got the oral meds and a shot (which I had to get on the sly at my sister's with three small children running around).  My husband is a little nervous about my "I don't give a fuck" attitude, but this is the most relaxed about TTC I have been in a year.  I have basically written this cycle off which is what my husband is upset about.

((HUGS)) to everyone, sorry about the rambling!

scrang74

Hi ladies!

This month is 6 months TTCAL, so we decided to get some testing done to make sure everything is kosher. CD3 testing came back all normal. However the FSH, 9.4, had my doc a little concerned but at the same time, pointed out it was a normal number for my age. Hubby had a SA but haven't heard back from the doc yet. So for now, we're just continuing the natural course of trying. I am on CD 14 today, and OPKs have been negative so far and temp hasn't spiked. I'm anticipating O tmrw, so FX. Not looking forward to next month as it is our EDD month.

rubysi

scrang74 said:

Hi ladies!

This month is 6 months TTCAL, so we decided to get some testing done to make sure everything is kosher. CD3 testing came back all normal. However the FSH, 9.4, had my doc a little concerned but at the same time, pointed out it was a normal number for my age. Hubby had a SA but haven't heard back from the doc yet. So for now, we're just continuing the natural course of trying. I am on CD 14 today, and OPKs have been negative so far and temp hasn't spiked. I'm anticipating O tmrw, so FX. Not looking forward to next month as it is our EDD month.

It is always good and frustrating when the numbers come out normal. Good luck this month. Be good to yourself next month.