it's Friday bitches.

thechickencoop

...

thechickencoop

I listen to a lot of inappropriate music in the car with DS and I don't feel bad about it. Not like anything too too bad I guess,but stuff with cussing, etc.

thechickencoop

I was actually a little upset last night when H turned down a blow job. We need to spice up our sex life a little bit and I was totally going to stick a finger up is ass.

oh, the actual confession part is that I was not going to tell him before hand. Going in for a hopefully good surprise? Like an ass ninja... :-?

goillini823

I started sleep training DS2 on Wednesday via the sleep lady shuffle. He has done awesome. He only wakes up twice and whines for about 2 minutes and goes back to sleep.
My confession is that I won't be able to use being so run down from lack of sleep for having done nothing around the house.

jensriot

I'm taking in a pile of dry cleaning that has been in my closet for a while. DH and I just don't wear much that needs it, obviously. Because I wore one of these pants for a Halloween party last year. Yikes!

minerswife17

I hate admitting this but I confess that I got really teary-eyed when The Guidices got sentenced yesterday. I just hate it for the kids. 

caybeh

I woke up with mastitis. DH's doesn't have any sick time as the new company started Wed and they paid out all the vacation/sick time under the old company. I told him he had to go to work and I would just send DS over to a friend's house. DH decided to stay home with us.

My confession is even though I told him to go to work, I'm really glad he decided to stay home.

fintin

Dh's birthday is on sunday and I can't make myself want to do anything special for him. He has been a grade A ass hole lately.

jesselayne8

JJ+SA said:

I don't wash our upper windows enough.

I never wash any windows. Sometimes I give the kids a windex wipe and let them go to town.

notkateanymore

scatteredtrees said:

I wish I didn't know someone was going to stick her finger up her Hs ass.

Seriously. It's like right up on the top of my list for things I didn't need to know...that Coop is planning on ass finger her husband without prior permission ASAP.

notkateanymore

My husband stayed home from work today and I just read him ass ninja...he says that's not a good surprise. Though he said I was more than welcome to be a blow job ninja at some point today. No.

zbeesma86

I feel like ass play should never be a surprise.

thechickencoop

scatteredtrees said:

cjcouple said:

scatteredtrees said:

I wish I didn't know someone was going to stick their finger up their Hs ass.

You could've kept THAT to yourself...lol

No, OP could have kept it to herself.

::shrug::

zbeesma86

Kimbus22 said:

zbeesma86 said:

I feel like ass play should never be a surprise.

I'm defending her assuming she was going to take her time and give him an option to say "WTF, stop it!" and not that she was just going to go 3 knuckles deep with no warning.

hahaha right? I'd hope. But for me, I'd need a play by play of what was going on. A finger up the butt isn't in my pleasure realm. And I know the last thing DH would want is for me to go milking his prostate while orally pleasing him.

Different strokes for different folks, I get it.

Andrewsgal

If I stuck a finger up my husbands ass I seriously don't think he would ever sleep with me again he would be pissed!

HeatherS2010

The only reason my windows are clean is because my kids have those window markers and that shit stains if it doesn't come off in a reasonable amount of time.
My DH would not like a finger in the ass. Surprise or otherwise.
My confession: I'm eating my kids chips while they nap. I'm also making DH eat his lunch for dinner since he keeps forgetting it at home and getting takeout.

Aussie45

Eh, I wouldn't care if DH surprised me with a finger in my ass. That being said, I know him and he would never do it and I know he wouldn't like that either. There's a big difference between surprising your spouse to try to spice up your sex life with something you'd think they'd like vs sticking a finger up their ass when you'd know they hate it.

I'm assuming coop is the former and not the latter.

magentawarped

I picked and flicked on the Haunted Mansion ride. Totally gross, but that booger wasn't going to wait and I didn't have a tissue.

I feel like this can't compete with uninvited ass fingering.

Arnegard

Kimbus22 said:

There's a mom on my BMB who says she puts flower headbands on her daughter because she has a boy's name so people think she's a boy.

I'm all, "Why the fuck do you give your girl a boy name if it's going to bother you if people think she's a boy?".  But I don't have the energy to deal with the shit show if I say that there.  Let them find it here and yell at me instead.

I've met boys with all 3 of my girls names.  I don't dress any of them anymore and really don't care what anyone thinks or says.  That said, there is also at least 1 other girl in our school with their names as well.

raraavis28

The question is, is the "surprise ass attack" grosser than the dog hair in the chicken? I vote yes.....and I guess my confession is I'm kinda relieved I wasn't the only one horrified and not the least bit turned on by such a notion.....

Coop, I will give you props for starting this thread out w/ a bang.....there will be no complaints of a boring FC today!

thechickencoop

Kimbus22 said:

zbeesma86 said:

I feel like ass play should never be a surprise.

I'm defending her assuming she was going to take her time and give him an option to say "WTF, stop it!" and not that she was just going to go 3 knuckles deep with no warning.


OMG yes so much this! keywords: gentle and slow lol.

Geicogecko

I've asked DH to leave my butt hole region alone these days but the man is drawn to it like a magnet. But late pregnancy and ass play just do not mix. DD to the rescue, she came out of our bathroom yesterday with my tube of presciption strength hemorrhoid cream and handed it to him. I don't even know where she found it because I haven't resorted to it yet, but I think things clicked.

ETA pronoun change. He's drawn to my butt like a magnet, not others' lol.

Keeptruckin

cjcouple said:

I feel intellectually inferior to most people IRL on a regular basis. I somehow feel like I "missed" something along the way to adulthood and it sucks. 

I felt this way today! The guy who came to clean my windows was from Scotland. He was so excited when I asked him about the referendum, but I really don't know much about it. He asked all these questions and I am pretty sure I sounded like an airhead!

Arnegard

My confession for you peeps is that I went running with friends yesterday morning - in Old Navy yoga pants and last month's marathon shirt.  The shirt is a fitted, technical weight so it isn't close to covering my ass.

I went grocery shopping afterwards.  I had so many things to get done yesterday that I did not have time to go home and shower & change before going shopping.

My girlfriends said, "At least you are going after a workout instead of putting on workout clothes to look like you did."  There you have it.  My IRL friends didn't give a crap what I wore (they were also in workout pants).

vlagrl29

I didn't know house windows were to be cleaned. lol.  I've been in this house for 8 years.  opppss

DH would kill me if I stuck a finger up his ass.  I wouldn't want to do that.  Some things just stayed in my 20s.  I've only done it 1 time and I thought the guy was weird for even wanting it.  something about milking the prostate….ewwww.

kcisthebombdotcom

JJ+SA said:

I don't wash our upper windows enough.

I only wash my windows when I have holiday stickers on them so like four times a year. I'm an amazing housekeeper.

I think its weird to ask permission before trying something new sexually. Certainly you can gauge your partners reaction in the moment...

magentawarped

kcisthebombdotcom said:

JJ+SA said:

I think its weird to ask permission before trying something new sexually. Certainly you can gauge your partners reaction in the moment...

I would agree with you on that for many things, but anal is potentially painful, potentially messy, and many people have a huge aversion to it. It's not something you just slip in there (pun intended).

kcisthebombdotcom

magentawarped said:

JJ+SA said:

I think its weird to ask permission before trying something new sexually. Certainly you can gauge your partners reaction in the moment...

I would agree with you on that for many things, but anal is potentially painful, potentially messy, and many people have a huge aversion to it. It's not something you just slip in there (pun intended).

she didn't say she was going to ram a cucumber in there or something. It's a finger. Certainly she could gauge whether her partner was into it before she actually did anything.

magentawarped

kcisthebombdotcom said:

magentawarped said:

kcisthebombdotcom said:

JJ+SA said:

I think its weird to ask permission before trying something new sexually. Certainly you can gauge your partners reaction in the moment...

I would agree with you on that for many things, but anal is potentially painful, potentially messy, and many people have a huge aversion to it. It's not something you just slip in there (pun intended).

she didn't say she was going to ram a cucumber in there or something. It's a finger. Certainly she could gauge whether her partner was into it before she actually did anything.

It may be cool with you, but for many people, that's a no-fly zone, so having a partner go there even just to "gauge a reaction" can be a huge turnoff and a violation of trust.

Hollylb3

I've actually heard that the finger up the butt can be extremely pleasurable for the man willing to try it. That being said, you couldn't pay me enough. I told DH that too, and he agreed. He did get the grapefruit BJ though, so he does alright.

Aussie45

I have never watched Gilmore Girls, Sex and the City, One Tree hill, or a lot of other popular TV shows that are "ZOMG you've never seen it?!?!" Eh, maybe one day.

magentawarped

Aussie45 said:

I have never watched Gilmore Girls, Sex and the City, One Tree hill, or a lot of other popular TV shows that are "ZOMG you've never seen it?!?!" Eh, maybe one day.

Me either. Add in Grey's Anatomy. The girls on my BMB think I'm broken.

dmartin726

But what if he was totally not prepared.  And had an awful reflex that caused him to just shit at the first feeling of stimulation.  Oh my god, now I want to vomit.  At my own comment X_X

Aussie45

magentawarped said:

I have never watched Gilmore Girls, Sex and the City, One Tree hill, or a lot of other popular TV shows that are "ZOMG you've never seen it?!?!" Eh, maybe one day.

Me either. Add in Grey's Anatomy. The girls on my BMB think I'm broken.

Oh ya, that one too. I knew I forgot one! I just feel like I've missed so many popular ones that now I have 4 major TV shows with shit tons of seasons to watch and I don't even know where to start. So, I just don't start.

magentawarped

Aussie45 said:

magentawarped said:

Aussie45 said:

I have never watched Gilmore Girls, Sex and the City, One Tree hill, or a lot of other popular TV shows that are "ZOMG you've never seen it?!?!" Eh, maybe one day.

Me either. Add in Grey's Anatomy. The girls on my BMB think I'm broken.

Oh ya, that one too. I knew I forgot one! I just feel like I've missed so many popular ones that now I have 4 major TV shows with shit tons of seasons to watch and I don't even know where to start. So, I just don't start.


I have no desire to watch them. I have a full schedule with all of the comic book shows and nerd fodder that are on right now. :-B

kcisthebombdotcom

Lmao that to respect your partner, you have to give them advanced verbal warning before trying anything new sexually so they can google search the risks.

Andrewsgal

Do you people not talk about your sex life? DH and I talk constantly about ours. New things we can/want to try. How to make it better etc. so yes we would both feel hugely disrespected if a finger was randomly shoved in our asses.

magentawarped

kcisthebombdotcom said:

Lmao that to respect your partner, you have to give them advanced verbal warning before trying anything new sexually so they can google search the risks.

When I was younger, I was against giving blowjobs. If a boyfriend had just randomly shoved a dick in my mouth to gauge my reaction, you can bet that he wouldn't get it back. It would have been incredibly disrespectful. You're not talking about busting out handcuffs where your partner can say "no, not into it" before they're cuffed...you're inserting something into an orifice without discussion or warning.

notkateanymore

Seriously this has got to be a record of how many times we've said asshole.

Also, as usual KC, you miss the fucking point. Trying a new position without asking is fine, sticking a finger up your ass without asking NOT fine. 

kcisthebombdotcom

Usually it isn't random though. Generally you take it slow with anything really. Not to get too graphic but don't people generally tease before going in for the kill? I didn't take it that she was just going to force his pants off and ram it in. I just don't think it needs to be a discussion over dinner and you can figure it out in the moment prior to the point of no return.

thechickencoop

Oh good grief, yea, my intention is not to make my husband feel uncomfortable or disrespected.  A wandering finger will certainly not destroy our sex life (or marriage), and if he's like, dafaq?  then that's that.  Then we'll laugh either way.  And yea, I probably wouldn't think anything of it if it was the other way around unless it was forceful or something, which, would in and of itself be the problem.  But just a little poke to gauge a response?  meh, that's just experimenting!