Thinking about #2

EricaOO

Hi ladies,

DD is 9 months old and I am starting to think about trying for #2 in the next couple of months.  I want an age gap of about 2 years apart but am wondering what others' experiences are having an age gap of 21 or 22 months apart.  I would not be opposed to having them 2 1/2 years apart either so it's sorta a debate.  How difficult is it having an age gap of just under 2 yrs? 

ashiscute

Mine are 19.5 mos apart.  It was very hard at the beginning trying to figure out how to take care of two LOs but I think that will be true for everyone regardless of age gap.  There are quite a few 2 under 2 moms in my playgroup so I'll tell you what I've noticed from my experience and theirs.

The older sibling is less likely to get jealous than if they were 2.5- 3.  From what I've seen those kids have had a harder adjustment, regressions, jealousy.  My DD never really showed much interest in DS after the first couple days of his being home.  Once she sort of processed that he was permanent and cried a lot and took up mommy's time she just sort of tuned him out.  

ashiscute

Sorry that posted sort of abruptly.  She didn't really tune back in to him until he was old enough to sit up (assisted) and she could bring him toys and he'd actually hold on to them.  Now they are 3.5 and 2 and are really good friends.  I think the benefit of having them close together is that they are the same play level earlier and can enjoy the same toys and games.  I really enjoy watching them together.  

I'm hoping for #3 right now and that would probably be a 3 year age gap between DS and #3.  It's interesting to see how that will be different from what I've done.  

EricaOO

Thank you ash.. I wondered at what age they really become jealous so this is good to know.

krazyinsane

My first two are 23 months...we were aiming for 21 months as we had babysat our friends' kids for a weekend and liked the gap. We love the kids being close in age and have been NTNP since our oldest was born.

23 months is our biggest gap but my sister just had her second and the gap is 3 years, 2 months. While her daughter seemed to grasp it a little better than my kids did, I agree that really the younger 'big' siblings just seem to deal better with the changes that occur with a new little one in the house.

EricaOO

krazyinsane said:

My first two are 23 months...we were aiming for 21 months as we had babysat our friends' kids for a weekend and liked the gap. We love the kids being close in age and have been NTNP since our oldest was born. 23 months is our biggest gap but my sister just had her second and the gap is 3 years, 2 months. While her daughter seemed to grasp it a little better than my kids did, I agree that really the younger 'big' siblings just seem to deal better with the changes that occur with a new little one in the house.

 

Thanks for your input!  My husband and I are NTNP right now but I would like to try in January.  I've just been a little nervous about have a 2nd before DD is 2 years old but I'm getting baby fever already