When someone steals your favorite name — The Bump
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When someone steals your favorite name

Hey ladies!  I've never posted here before but I was hoping I could get some opinions on something.  I have had my girl name picked out forever- Amelia.  It took us a while to get pregnant so we have had lots of time to spend thinking about this, and this is the one name that DH and I both love.  Well I went on Facebook this morning, and my ex-boyfriend's wife just had their baby and of all the names in the world, guess what they picked.  I haven't talked to him in about 8 years, they live hours away, and we don't have any mutual friends.  Is it crazy to still consider using this name??
Me: 28 DH: 30 Married 3 years
Stopped BC 7/13 Officially TTC 9/13
First RE appt 3/28 Dx- non-IR PCOS
No response from Clomid 50mg or Femara 5mg
Clomid 100mg- BFP! Beta #1 15 DPO 169, Beta #2 17 DPO 340
EDD: 4/15/15



Re: When someone steals your favorite name

  • No. Use the name.

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    [Deleted User]blu-eyedwife
  • Use it. They didn't steal it, they used a name you happen to like. Any name is up for grabs and it's been 8 years.
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  • Use it!
       
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  • Use it. Especially considering you havent spoken in 8 years. 
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  • Use it!!!!! and congrats!!!
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  • Okay, I guess "stolen" was a poor choice of word- I'll just say used instead.  I appreciate your opinions, thanks everyone!
    Me: 28 DH: 30 Married 3 years
    Stopped BC 7/13 Officially TTC 9/13
    First RE appt 3/28 Dx- non-IR PCOS
    No response from Clomid 50mg or Femara 5mg
    Clomid 100mg- BFP! Beta #1 15 DPO 169, Beta #2 17 DPO 340
    EDD: 4/15/15



  • ...did you just Facebook stalk this person and see that? If you haven't even spoken in eight years I can't even image you are Facebook friends so it seems like a very odd thing to be concerned with.
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    this decaf life[Deleted User]
  • No, I never bothered unfriending him.  He never posts anything so I didn't realize I was even still friends with him.  I realize it probably does seem odd to be concerned about it especially since it's been so long, but I just felt like it is weird to name your baby the same name as anyone else you know.  
    Me: 28 DH: 30 Married 3 years
    Stopped BC 7/13 Officially TTC 9/13
    First RE appt 3/28 Dx- non-IR PCOS
    No response from Clomid 50mg or Femara 5mg
    Clomid 100mg- BFP! Beta #1 15 DPO 169, Beta #2 17 DPO 340
    EDD: 4/15/15



  • Use it...

    Honestly, the only weird situation would be if your ex used your name on his baby.  Like exact first and middle.
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  • i would stick him in the "people I don't know anymore" category and not worry about it
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  • You should totally still use the name:

    1) It was your idea first

    2) You are completey separated from him

    3) You love it.  

    You are too far removed from this person to allow them to have such an influence on your decision.

  • Stop thinking about it. Use Amelia.
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    DawnJM25ArgyleBride
  • Still use it!! It's not a big deal and like you said you haven't spoken in 8 years and don't even live near each other to worry about any awkwardness.
  • KimL725 said:
    No, I never bothered unfriending him.  He never posts anything so I didn't realize I was even still friends with him.  I realize it probably does seem odd to be concerned about it especially since it's been so long, but I just felt like it is weird to name your baby the same name as anyone else you know.  
    I understand where you're coming from. But in the end, I'm going to guess you guys won't be double dating or anything, so I'd use it. Like PPs said, it's getting very popular so I wouldn't put as much thought into it as if it were a name out of the top 1000 or something.
                                       
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  • Why in the world would your ex-bf's kid effect you?  Amelia is a pretty common-ish name, it's totally fine for you to use it. 

    (if you haven't spoken in 8 years...why do you have him on Facebook?)

    No body owns a name, it can't be stolen.

    My cousin used my favorite boy's name for her son.  I was sad but she happened to have a little boy first (and it's her husband's first name).  I could still use it if I wanted to but I'm not.

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  • kdr1710 said:
    P.S. Why are you friends with your ex-boyfriends wife? Or your ex-boyfriend? Unfriend/unfollow them and move on...
    This is really all I was thinking.  Seems odd to be friends with an ex, let alone his new wife.  That said, use the name.  It's fine.  It's not like you will ever see them or your kid will ever interact with theirs.  NBD.
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  • Am I the only one that doesn't necessarily find the situation that weird? Maybe! I ended up friending a HS boyfriend's wife after we played on the same soccer team last year. She's just SO.NICE. haha. I couldn't care less what he's up to, but she's just the sweetest thing.
                                       
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    [Deleted User]
  • Ummm use it! Who cares if you don't know her or see her...


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  • Ummm use it! Who cares if you don't know her or see her...


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  • My sister's high school ex-boyfriend with whom she is still good friends, just named his daughter one of our top choices and I'm not taking it off our list (and I see him a few times a year like my sister and nephew's birthday parties or whatever). If you never see or speak to this guy, then it's certainly still fair game. 
  • I think if you reread all of that, you would realize that OF COURSE you should still use the name. :) 

    Some guy you used to date who you have not spoken with in 8 years and you both have moved on and gotten married named his daughter something you love for your own daughter? This is not a reason to not use a name. If it ever comes up (and it won't) just say "I guess great minds think alike!" and leave it at that in a positive way. They didn't steal the name from you either. Probably you are pretty similar to his wife as people tend to date/be attracted to similar people and you both just have great taste in names.

    If the name were truly unusual... like you both named your daughters Amialah or something then that would be quite odd. But Amelia is a great name and much loved/used so there is no reason to feel weird whatsoever about using it. 
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  • Also agree with others. I am not a facebooker so I just don't get it. If you have not talked to him in 8 years and not close to these people, why have you friended them on facebook? I wouldn't want random acquaintances seeing my private family photos and pictures of my kids. I just don't really understand this.


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  • No, Amelia is super popular. You are going to run into lots of people who have used it.

    I have an ex who has a son named Henry, it hasn't stopped me from keeping it on my long list because, ya know, it is a popular name. It has nothing to do with him. 

    And frankly, it shouldn't come as a surprise to people that they may have similar baby name taste as exes. You obviously had enough in common to date for some period of time, just because you broke up doesn't mean that those commonalities have disappeared.
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    [Deleted User]
  • My daughters name is Amelia. While I was pregnant with her, my neighbors asked what I was naming her. I told them. I've loved the name for 10 years and it was always my first choice. Anyways, my neighbors went out and bought a puppy. Guess what they named her? You guessed it. Amelia. I was furious! Needless to say, I still used the name and moved away shortly after.
  • Use it

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