Fighting with hubby

Ravenbaby

Lately we just seem to be butting heads ALL the time. This is our second baby, he just got a promotion but we don't know how much the increase will be, we just know he won't be getting it till March I'm wanting to work part time so not knowing the full financial picture makes me nervous. These are just a few of the stressful things going on. I feel like right now we should be happy with a new baby on the way and the fact that we are like this makes me sad. I know I need to talk to him but just wanted to put this out into a space and off my head/heart for now

ANGnJON

Sorry you're in a rough patch with your DH! Hang in there, I'm sure things will get better soon!

Emerald27

I'm sorry. ((hugs))

Welcoming a new baby is such a blessing and a wonderful thing, but it is stressful and frightening and brings worry about supporting your family, etc. It's unfortunately just unrealistic to expect the entire baby planning/growing process to be sunshine and roses.

Have you looked at how much money working part time might save you in terms of needing to pay less for childcare? If you weigh the costs of commuting full time + childcare with the costs associated with going part time, that might help put your mind at ease. You might end up saving some money because of being part time!

Finances are especially scary for the parent who carries the majority of or the full earning responsibility for your family, so even though it's super hard, try to cut your DH some slack and support and encourage him. Remind him that he is an excellent provider and that he contributes so much more than just his work time and money to your family, that you value him as daddy as well as provider.

Big life changes are just plain scary and bring stress and strife. I hope you guys can calmly approach this with care and determine what is the best route for each of you and your family as a whole!

jlz32185

I can sympathize with your situation. My husband lost his job 2 weeks before we found out I was pregnant (we had been trying for almost a year). Fortunately he was able to find a job quickly but he's making less and we had depleted our saving and ran up our credit cards in the mean time. I feel like my entire first trimester was just miserable. We hardly talked and when we did it was only to fight.

I was really depressed and then of course felt guilty for feeling that way. The BEST thing I did was sit down and had a heart to heart with him. I told him that I shared his concerns about finances but wanted to focus more on joy of finally having a baby. Things have gotten better. We try to discuss what we need to about finances and then let it go and enjoy our time together and this pregnancy. I don't know if it's in the cards for us to have another (obviously for financial reasons) so we have both tried to make an effort to enjoy every moment while we can! We still argue but we try to move on quicker and not hold a grudge. Hang in there!

lilmissfancy

I understand your  frustration but, try not to stress. I had to quit my job because my MS was so bad. I called the cable, internet and cell phone company, to see if I could get the bill lowered. They magically found a deal that saves us a lot each month. We cut back on spending on fast food, shopping and going out. Now I'm trying to get into couponing. I just want to make sure we are financially set while I'm not working.

bumpuser10309732

I'm sorry you're having a rough patch with DH. Money can put such a strain on a marriage, I think talking it out would do you both a lot of good. Hopefully you get it figured out! ((hugs))