Lost job and seeking

jnkametz

I've searched through the boards but haven't found anything related so my apologies if this is duplicated. I'm currently 6w6d. June 10 is when I peed on the stick. My husband was with me, he read the box aloud saying "wait 3min" and I shouted back we don't have to. The second line came that fast! We were both shocked but truly excited. The next morning I was torn about telling my boss or not. I worked for a very small business of 5 people. We had talked over a year ago around the time I was getting married about my life plans, of settling down and having a family. She was right on board. She said motherhood is the biggest job I'll ever do (she has 3 children of her own). My main concern was since we were so small, could she give me maternity leave, std, etc. She guarenteed at least 6weeks off but depending on how the business was running, possibly 12weeks paid. I was so happy to hear this news because I likes my job and didn't want to have to search for something else. Well, since we were so small and she already knew I was in the "trying" phase, I figured I'd give her the most time to prep. I went into her and gave her the news. Her initial reaction was, oh sh!t followed by congratulations. I felt good. I was happy. Then at the end of the day we received an email with a "business update." She decided she couldn't do it anymore, running a business, and she let all of go effective immediately. I LOST IT! The whole conversation I had with her in the morning and the whole conversation I had with her prior, meant nothing. The exact situation I was trying to avoid this whole time now is here! Now being pregnant went from one of the happiest moments of my life to something bittersweet. My husband and I make a decent amount, however I am the breadwinner of the family. We can go for a little bit without work, but not long. I've been interviewing like crazy these past two weeks and I have a good feeling I may have an offer or two coming at me hopefully soon, but when do I drop the bomb on the new company? Do I wait for 90 days of probationary period and tell them after? Do I wait until my 12 week mark? My tummy is already bloated that my pants are tight; I'm worried how long I can go that I can hide it. Anyone in the same boat or know of someone who was?

cmelliott

I would wait at least until you have the job because even though it shouldn't happen people still don't get hired sometimes for being pregnant. Once in the job I would tell them as soon as you're comfortable because they're gonna need to know you're gonna need some time off eventually.

argonne

Definitely don't tell them at the interview phase.  If you would like to tell them when you get or accept an offer, that would be fine.  I think they would appreciate having more time than not to prepare for your absence.

aliciahaugen

kkleigh10 said:

Definitely don't tell them at the interview phase.  If you would like to tell them when you get or accept an offer, that would be fine.  I think they would appreciate having more time than not to prepare for your absence.

This...kind of. I would tell HR (never the hiring manager) when you receive the offer rather than after you accept it. That way you can negotiate maternity leave if you need to. Once the offer is accepted you may not have any wiggle room with their company policy. Again...tell HR. They should be well versed in knowing they cannot retract an offer due to pregnancy and will be in a better place to negotiate leave. The hiring manager may have a different reaction entirely.

Agree with both comments, but given your previous situation working for a small business and possibly going to another small business there may not be an HR department. I work for a small accounting firm and any HR requests/needs go thru the partners of the firm.

Definitely wait to tell them, but I would definitely find out exactly what their maternity leave is during the offer phase... Don't accept anything without 100% knowing what you're getting into.

I didn't do this when I got this job (we weren't trying at the time) and wish I had. I'm due during tax season, which means zero PTO. They'll be flexible with giving me maybe a week or two off, but beyond that I'm SOL.

nah82

No real advice but just wanted to say sorry this happened to you.  When I was pregnant with my first, the company I was working for declared bankruptcy right as I was starting my maternity leave.  My son was miraculously born on the last day we were to have benefits.  The company changed hands while I was on maternity leave, and a week after I came back to work, the new company announced they had sold us to yet another company, who would be closing the doors and not keeping any of the staff.  It sucked.  I hope you find a new job soon!

jnkametz

Thanks ladies! It's just a crap situation altogether. I have such mixed emotions about the pregnancy simply over the timing. I would be ecstatic if I was still working and I really can't convince myself to get there until all the pieces to the puzzle are put together. I know I'm not covered by FMLA and in Florida it's a right to work state, so they don't need a reason to let me go within the first 90 days; after 90 days they need a paper trail. I will keep you posted. Thanks again!