Will it get better? please help!

Neverbug

Hello,

I just had my baby 2 1/2 weeks ago. Since then I've been suffering from what I think is severe post partum depression and I don't know what to do. I feel completely detached from the baby, like there is no way I am his mother. I don't like holding him. When I'm feeling especially bad I can't even look at him without feeling sick. I get really bad anxiety attacks where I beg my husband to let me put him up for adoption. It's so horrible, I am embarrassed to write this. I feel like I will always feel bad and won't ever be abel to take care of him myself. I barely have an appetite and have lost my pregnant weight very quickly (already almost back to my original weight). My husband has been the main caregiver as he's been home, but will go back to work soon. I am petrified of taking care of the baby myself, and I don't think I can do it without having a nervous breakdown. I've reached out a lot for help- but so far nothing is getting better. I went ot the ER twice and they could only suggest 5 day inpatient which I didn't want to do. I've been to 2 therapists, the one that was pretty decent isnt' covered by insurance so I can't afford to go back. The best thing was that I went to my OB and she prescribed a low dose of Zoloft. I've been taking it just under a week and don't feel better at all. She said it will take at least a couple weeks, but I don't feel like it will help.. and how do I cope until then? Is it possible that this is just me and not a depression? That I just never should have had a baby and I will always feel like this? What If I just wasn't meant to be a parent?

emod10

I still have one really bad day per week like this. I see my psychiatrist every 2-6 weeks and have been seeing her for almost 10 months. I'm searching for a new therapist currently but was seeing her weekly.

It does get better. Promise. You do have to actively try though. Maybe take the inpatient deal even though you don't want to do it. Keep asking for help and, most importantly, take all the help you can get.

flcl

I want to commend you for all that you have been doing already to get the help you need.  I'm also glad to hear that you're not opposed to taking meds, keep taking them and pay extra attention to how you're feeling now that you've been on them.  You may want to ask DH to do the same thing.  PP is right in as you will feel better eventually, but it's going to take a lot of work.  Besides DH, do you have anyone else nearby to help (family, friends)?  What did DH say to the 5-day inpatient treatment?  If DH can get help with baby, I would encourage you to reconsider the 5-day inpatient program.  It's going to be pretty intensive, but it may be just what you need to get over this hump and start feeling better.  It may connect you with a therapist that you like and continue seeing.  If you decide that the program is not feasible, keep looking for a therapist to talk to.  Another idea is contact your hospital and see if they have any groups you can join.  Continue to reach out and try to keep an open mind to the different treatment options out there.  GL.

Ktorrisi

I remember feeling this way (sorta) with my daughter. She's almost 8 now. I'm 31 weeks with baby #2. It took a few weeks...but it DOES get better. If you feel like your medicine isn't helping then tell your dr you want something that will help right away in the meantime (maybe Xanax?) Just be patient, things will improve. Good luck and hang in there.

aprilshowers1234

I just had my son 6 weeks ago and during my ninth month of pregnancy I started get severe anxiety and panic attacks. I didn't know then what was going on and my husband and mother kept telling me it was most likely hormones. The first time I got it this fog came over me almost like my equilibrium was off and I didn't feel my self.I started crying and getting really nervous over everything. I was hoping it would go away after the baby was born but after almost looking him an emergency c section and having him stay in nicu it only got worse. I went to my ob and she put me on Zoloft im only on it 5 days it does take two weeks to get in your system and it could take up to 6 weeks to feel better, it depends. Dont forget to your hormones are raging and because I took fertility drugs to fet prego im experiencing hormones to the max! I went to the ER last week and they gave me xanax forthe panic. Not sure what brings them on but iys gotta be chemical and hormonal. I cry at least once a day. And when my son crys anxiety comes on full force. Im told it gets better and It will. Faith. Message me back if you wanna talk or have any questions. Good luck