Update after 2nd consult

violetmarie61516

Hi everyone.  I know I haven't been around much but I'm trying to come back more often.  Work has been so incredibly busy.  We are moving and expanding appx. 8x our current size.  Needless to say, I've been working like a crazy woman.  I had a phone consult with Dr. Duffy at FIRM for our 2nd FET.  I really like him and I think he will give us our best shot at success with DEmbryos.  We still have 3 blasts at this point.  We are going to do a mock cycle this month with a trial transfer and we're also doing an endometriel function test with Kliman's method.  If should take about 10-14 days to come back and then we will make a plan for another transfer at that point. I'm really concerned about travel and time off work, not to mention the cost involved.  I haven't even asked about the costs yet.  I was so worried about my consult after our horrible experience the last time and I completely forgot to ask about money.

He also talked about using and egg donor.  I have been against using DH sperm with a donor egg for quite some time now but I recently find myself considering it.  I still have time to ponder it and decide.  We want to give our embryos a chance first before we think about our next steps.  I was just surprised that I was considering it after so long.

Twinkie0612

Congrats on moving forward! I hope your tests come great and you can move on to transfer soon!

A few thoughts..First I believe if you have leftover embryos, your transfer price is reduced at FIRM, you only have to pay the higher rate if you end up having to pick new embryos.

As for egg donors, have you thought about doing a double donor cycle? Donor sperm is inexpensive when you compare it to the cost of donor eggs. It might be a good option since you are uneasy cycling with donor eggs and your husband's sperm. It's sort of like using donor embryos, but you get to pick both donors and it usually has a higher success rate, since the embryos are created by two fertile people, where donor embryos were created by a couple suffering from infertility. California Conceptions' donor embryos are actually double donor embryos (they make their embryos using donor eggs and donor sperm). They are less expensive than a traditional double donor cycle, but you have to pay for a 3 cycle plan, I don't believe you get to keep any extra embryos, and you don't get to pick each individual donor.

poohniki

Glad to see an update. Sorry work is such a pain, but its great that you found a new RE that you like.

I am still in the "trying every possible option" before going to egg donor, but I know when I do get there I will be kind of in the same boat. DH also had a torsion and has azoo. We have some sperm frozen at our clinic, but he is ok with donor sperm and I don't even think he remembers he has sperm in storage. We originally decided if we found a proven donor and received more than 10 eggs we would fertilize anything over 10 with DH's sperm. I won't be able to see the eggs not fertilize or arrest on day 2 because of my decision- but I don't want to say he doesn't deserve a chance. 

FX you won't need next steps and these embryos have your take home baby!

Km672

@Love4Labs326‌ - So very sorry about your last cycle. This is all so very hard. I hope you are able to find a path you are comfortable with. >:D<

@Twinkie0612‌ - I have heard that California conceptions are from 2 donors, but I haven't been able to find anything on their website that stated this...also, pls correct me if I am wrong, but I believe you can do individual cycle pricing... I would not qualify for their 3 cycle guarantee because I am a 4x egg donor recepient failure.. (If we do take this route, I'd be a 6x failure by then) If you have anymore info on this program, could you let me know? Just trying to figure out our next steps, assuming it doesn't work with the 2 blasts we have left.
Thanks in advance!

poohniki

@Km672 I spoke with California Conceptions around November. They select the donor for you. They said they would only match you on your race- factors like eye color and hair color are not their concern. I am not sure how they select the sperm donor- but it is my understanding that everyone you cycle with will potential have full siblings (and almost the exact same birthday). 

They also said that they will only let you turn down the donor a few times- so you can't wait for the perfect donor to be presented. 

In my opinion, it is truly a last step.

Km672

@poohniki - thank you so much for the info. Did they tell you they use egg and sperm donors? I still can't find any more info, despite multiple searches.

I totally understand what you mean about it being a last step... I agree with you, about all of the issues you are mentioning about the cons, they are the reasons we spent so much time and money doing 2 fresh cycles.

Unfortunately, that's exactly where we will be at, our last steps. We have no interest in doing a 3rd fresh cycle. Our other options are a frozen DE cycle, donor embryo or domestic infant adoption. We've been at this for 5+ years, we can't do this much longer.

Jessarab

Work sounds insane! It can be difficult to balance this process and a crazy work life, lol unfortunately I know that all too well! 

Moving onto DE's isn't always an easy pill to swallow - I was very much against it when it first came up. Something clicked along the way as I started doing adoption research and I realized how much I wanted to carry and give birth. Our clinic made the process as personal as it could be with amazing donor profiles that really showcased the personality of each donor along with baby photos and adult photos. I wonder if it's the same for DS? 

Wishing you the best of luck as you move along in the process!

Twinkie0612

@Km672 I haven't personally looked into CC all of my information comes from what I've learned from my EA group.