Egg sharing vs. egg donation?

AllieAlba

I don't actually know if you guys have egg sharing in the US, but it's when a woman donates some of their eggs in the same way that you would normally donate eggs, but you get free IVF in return. I've already booked my IUI, and since I've already had a load of tests done on my ability to carry and on my eggs themselves, and found that I have no fertility problems, my consultant said I shouldn't actually need IVF, but I definitely want to donate some of my eggs anyway.

I was wondering if anybody could tell me about their experiences with egg sharing or egg donation in general.

brooklynesque

There are some egg donors on this board who can tell you how it's been for them.  I'm a DE recipient and so grateful to those who choose to donate.  You'll have to see how things go, though, obviously -- tests don't tell the whole story.  A large % of infertility is unexplained.  (The tests told me my eggs should be okay, when in fact I can't use them at all. )

ArgyleBride

Hi there--I am an egg donor, but our situations are awfully different since I wasn't looking to get pregnant myself.  I think it's really lovely (and important!) that you want to donate eggs anyway, and not only as a cost-saving measure.  It's very important to be certain you're completely on board for this type of thing, because of how important it is to recipients that we follow through and also because you are helping to create a life that wouldn't really exist without you, which is pretty heavy and worth reflection.  If you're sure, though, I don't see a downside *except* not ending up with as many eggs as you would have liked, and coveting the donated ones.  

Happy to answer any specific questions about donating.  I have never for a second regretted it, my IPs are due in July and I'm over the moon for them.  I am planning to donate again in June.

AllieAlba

@ArgyleBride I've got loads of questions! Obviously, don't answer any you aren't comfortable with.

Did you have the needle/ultrasound procedure to have the eggs removed from your ovaries, or a Laparoscopy? Did it hurt?
Were you under a general anaesthetic or were you sedated  for the procedure?
Did you donate 'fresh' eggs straight to the recipient, or were they frozen for later use?
Did you donate just one egg, or did you have hormone treatment so you could donate more than one at a time?
Did you have to speak to a counselor before you donated eggs? And if so, what did they ask you?
And this one if just out of curiosity, since it's illegal in the UK, but did you meet the recipients of your eggs?

Sorry for asking so many questions, but I don't know anyone who had donated eggs to ask.

ArgyleBride

Happy to answer! 

AllieAlba said:

@ArgyleBride I've got loads of questions! Obviously, don't answer any you aren't comfortable with.

Did you have the needle/ultrasound procedure to have the eggs removed from your ovaries, or a Laparoscopy? Did it hurt?

I'm embarrased to say I don't know the details of what Laparoscopy is, but I am pretty sure the needle/ultrasound is what I had.  It didn't hurt.  

Were you under a general anaesthetic or were you sedated  for the procedure?

General.  My clinic offers an "awake" option but it isn't their standard.

Did you donate 'fresh' eggs straight to the recipient, or were they frozen for later use?

Fresh.  They would have fertilized them first even if they wanted to freeze, I suspect.

Did you donate just one egg, or did you have hormone treatment so you could donate more than one at a time?

Hormone treatment, and I produced a ton of them.  I have never heard of single-egg donation.  Is that done?  As an aside, I had no side effects from the hormones except mild pain from bloat.

Did you have to speak to a counselor before you donated eggs? And if so, what did they ask you?

Yes, I did.  They asked things such as who I would tell, how I would feel if I never had children of my own, what was important to me in my recipients and how I felt about not getting any say in who they were.  They also asked about trauma in my life, including if I'd ever been raped, which surprised me.  I wrote about it at the time here: https://forums.thebump.com/discussion/9093032/egg-donation-cont-psych-and-medical

And this one if just out of curiosity, since it's illegal in the UK, but did you meet the recipients of your eggs?

No.  I was afraid I would start subconsciously evaluating their fitness as parents, which is squicky.  Didn't want to go there.

Sorry for asking so many questions, but I don't know anyone who had donated eggs to ask.

I'm happy to answer.  Ask away

LittleLady77

OP why are you having infertility treatments? Is it something on your husbands side or unexplained? I'll be brutally honest, we do have the cycles you are talking about over here but they are wildly uncommon because most people looking for eggs don't want to "invest" in eggs coming from another person who has fertility problems herself. The whole point of using a donor is to increase your chances of conceiving and using a donor who has a problem doesn't help that. You might have a very difficult time finding a couple who would be willing to pay for your cycle. That being said, I have seen this happen when the fertility issue is on the male side (azoo or something else that requires IVF) but the woman is healthy fertility wise. That's really the only way a reputable fertility clinic would allow it in the states. Sorry if that was direct but I wanted to be honest.

AllieAlba

@LittleLady77 I'm assuming you're viewing this on your mobile; I'm single, and using donor sperm, as it says in my siggy. So, as far as we know (things that you can find through testing) I am perfectly fertile.

LittleLady77

AllieAlba said:

@LittleLady77 I'm assuming you're viewing this on your mobile; I'm single, and using donor sperm, as it says in my siggy. So, as far as we know (things that you can find through testing) I am perfectly fertile.

Yep, viewing on mobile. In that case it's a great option

ArgyleBride

Running back to add--I said ER didn't hurt, but I just remembered that I used a hot water bottle and I don't know why I would have if it didn't hurt!  So yeah it probably did :P  

By the way, I think it's wonderful you're pursuing single motherhood--that was always my plan if things didn't pan out for a marriage.