We just had a backup nanny/babysitter cancel on us last-minute, via care.com message, that she does not feel comfortable babysitting for us because of our nanny cameras.
In her interview we told her we have two cameras, one in the living room and one in the baby's room. They are essentially webcams which allow us to check in while at work. The reason we wanted them is we do not have any family in the city we live, so we have to hire strangers to care for our daughter.
We have googled questions about nanny cams, and what we've read in various articles is that nannys are usually fine with it as long as they are not being secretly recorded. But is that true or are they more off-putting than that?
We are especially disappointed, because this woman would have been seemingly perfect otherwise. We have a regular nanny who is okay with the cameras, and we finally had to find a backup person because our nanny will be gone for the first time since we hired her. (We also are starting to think about hiring a babysitter, so we can have a date night once in a while.)
Wondering all your thoughts. Also, if this backup person would only be used on occasion, would you consider not telling her about the cameras to avoid a situation like this?
thank you.
Re: Are nanny cams off-putting?
I think it's weird that she had a problem with it. We have security cameras in our house and you can bet if I was leaving my child there with a sitter, they'd be on.
She didn't decline the job at first. We interviewed her on Wednesday, offered her the job Sunday, she said yes, then changed her mind and backed out the following Wednesday.
Makes us wish we just never mentioned the camera since she left us in a big jam when we needed child care.
It's not that we are "leaving our kid with someone we have that little faith in"... But we don't have family or neighbors to watch her so we have no choice but to hire a stranger. (Our work hours make centers and home daycares impossible)
The camera just gives a little peace of mind.
My kid is my priority and if a potential nanny had a prob with the camera then *I* would not hire her. I don't see any difference from having days when I'm home with the nanny around and being able to keep tabs on her vs. being away and using the cameras to do the same. Would it be ok if a nanny told you she didn't feel comfortable doing her job if you were home bc she would feel scrutinized? I don't think so. In my opinion, a nanny cam is no different.
Keep looking, you will find one that not only doesn't care but that understands why you have cameras. Also as long as they are in the open, I don't see any reason to disclose. It's not like she's blind and can't see them and decide of its a deal breaker for her.
I am also a former nanny. I wouldn't want to work for someone who was recording /monitoring my every move. In fact, I would actively avoid that situation. To me, it implies a lack of trust and definitely hints at micromanagement.
My reluctance to be recorded isn't because I do things with my charges that I don't want their parents seeing, I don't want to be recorded by anyone for any reason.
Finally, if I found out a family I worked for recorded me without my knowledge I would be livid and I would tell everyone in my network of providers! Most of the providers I know feel the same way I do about cameras, so I suspect that family would suddenly have a tough time finding childcare.
I probably sound like I don't get the other side of the coin, but I actually do. When you go into someone's home to do a job, you are making yourself vulnerable too. But the fact of the matter is, while you may miss out on some good people by having a camera, I think you will eventually find a good nanny if you have one and you'll have the peace of mind a camera provides.
I've been thinking more about this... my reaction to the idea of cameras might be based on where I live. I live in the Midwest. Everyone here knows everyone else somehow, even in the "big" (500,000-1million) cities, there is no anonymity. It's very difficult to find an actual stranger. This is much different, I imagine, from people who live in locations like NYC... I can see how a nanny camera would be desired in a place like that. I still wouldn't want to be on it.
In an area where there are actual "strangers" I think it would be more expected among the childcare community... accepted as part of the job. Where I am, the centers don't even have cameras.
Also, as the other poster stated above, a live-feed camera wouldn't be so bad. I'm leery of being recorded.
Anyway, I hope you can get some backup figured out. Hopefully cameras are more the norm where you are and that one instance was an insolated incident. Good luck.
I also live in the Midwest and there are plenty of strangers in my 20,000 people town where I have lived for 12 years. I don't agree with PP on that point at all. Daycare centers around me have cameras as well.
OP I agree with a PP who suggested phrasing the discussion differently and in a way that makes it sound more like you want to check on and see your kids not spy on the nanny. I think just the term nanny cam is off putting.
I'm not saying all of the Midwest is like that, but it is like that where I live. Sure, there are strangers...I didn't mean that literally, but the two biggest population areas are college towns and most small town kids move to one or the other and then stay. I can get the scoop on most anyone I want with two phone calls. It's awesome... and terrible.
Anyway, looking from her point of view, maybe she just doesnt want to be micro managed or something. but id be suspicious (as always). HTH
Also, I would try to avoid micro-managing. Obviously, if you see truly egregious behavior, that's a problem. But if your nanny sits down for 5 minutes on the couch while the kid(s) are playing contently on their own and she looks at her phone, and is normally otherwise pretty active and engaged - I wouldn't say anything.
You say "why did I hire her if I have to supervise her". well, if you're a manager and you hire a new employee... you supervise them, right? Why wouldn't you want to have some supervision over your nanny - the person taking care of your children?
Nanny cam aside - anyone who has a nanny DOES supervise to a degree. If part of their job is to clean up after lunch and they don't do that? Well, you're going to talk to them about it, right?
But this also goes back to the person who said they hate the term "nanny cam". I feel like having a camera in your home really should be about wanting to see your kids because you miss them. And the side benefit, at least w/ a new nanny, is to make sure they are basically doing what they are supposed to be doing. But I would hope that in time, you're concern over that would lessen once the nanny has proven herself.
Yes but at work your supervisor is presumably at work with you and can call or stop by your office at any time. Usually you can't do that with a nanny. And as someone with a nanny cam, I don't use it to monitor her all day. Obviously I work and have other things to do which is why I have a nanny. But I do like to check in around lunch and see what they are up to or see if she's sleeping and how/what time her naps are. My nanny takes her to the park so obviously I'm not monitoring her every movement as they spend a big chunk of the day outside. I think you're assuming (incorrectly) that people with nanny cams watch every movement all day long and then use it as a tool to micromanage their nannies when in fact most of us just want to check in on our kids and feel a little connected during the day.