We were on a roll for a bit, since I got off hormonal BC...my drive bounced back nicely for the mody part. But honestly, with me just starting a PT job , DS just starting DC 2 days a week and whatnot, we're just trying to adjust to a new schedule.
Aside from.that, TBH, DH is pretty vanilla in bed lately. Sometimes I just want rough, quick, and dirty. He's not always into it. So boredom strikes...thats kind of where we're at.Meh.
We were on a roll for a bit, since I got off hormonal BC...my drive bounced back nicely for the mody part. But honestly, with me just starting a PT job , DS just starting DC 2 days a week and whatnot, we're just trying to adjust to a new schedule.
Aside from.that, TBH, DH is pretty vanilla in bed lately. Sometimes I just want rough, quick, and dirty. He's not always into it. So boredom strikes...thats kind of where we're at.Meh.
We are in one of our dry spells. Once a week is the most. I hate it.
Also I too want to have more lust with it. Not well I like sex and doing it with you so lets go do it, but the I can't wait another minute sex in the laundry room/kitchen etc.
I have a box but after kids it's all a tad tight;) I love screaming o vibrating cock rings. Those are like 4-7$ and amazing. Our usual is 3 a week but were going 0-1/2 a week and that's low. I usually just want it to take care of him but lately I've been wanting to rip him apart. He wears this captain America shirt, with plaid thick soft pants and I just go crazy. Weird I know
dedddddddddddddddddddddddd
I can't help it. He also has a beard. A red one, he has brown hair but red beard....drool. I think my drive has gotten a huge boost since no more birth control or worries of pregnancy. He got the v in September.
Did you marry my ex? He wore a Captain America damn shirt every damn day for years. Usually with holes in them, despite me having bought him a new one every year or 6 months.
He only has one and it's practically new. He isn't in love with it but I love it.
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We are in one of our dry spells. Once a week is the most. I hate it.
Also I too want to have more lust with it. Not well I like sex and doing it with you so lets go do it, but the I can't wait another minute sex in the laundry room/kitchen etc.
This is how I feel too. I want that lust back. I feel like sex lately is so ho-hum.
We are in one of our dry spells. Once a week is the most. I hate it.
Also I too want to have more lust with it. Not well I like sex and doing it with you so lets go do it, but the I can't wait another minute sex in the laundry room/kitchen etc.
This is how I feel too. I want that lust back. I feel like sex lately is so ho-hum.
Anyone? Any good news lately on the sex front?
Dh and I were on a dry spell for a few weeks. We usually have a good drive but dh and I just weren't at our normal amount. In 6 days we've had sex 5 times. He just got out of his jams to go get me more wine:() love. I also ordered this sexy number from trashy.com
My tummy is y great but dh loves lingerie so I'm gonna try, oh I'm ordering in black not pink
Bless you for knowing what your hubby likes and going for it!
For my wife and I, it's been more than three months.
:-<
it's been VERY hard for me to be quiet on the subject but with a new baby around I really didn't want to push the topic. The real issue is that I work out of town during the week and come home early on fridays, with a very healthy appetite for my wife and she just isnt into it. At all. I dont know what happened with the whole pregnancy thing but she is like a different person. When she used to work, she used to wake me up at 5am! we have discussed it at great length and I dont want to push it on her, so she has tried to instigate a few times but it's been very awkward and she complains about it being painful so we never really even get started. It just seems like she is literally shutting me out - she doesnt want me there..... and it's very difficult to deal with especially being gone all week. I just feel like i should clean my own house, wash my brand new car that i never use, pay for everything and leave again.
@ratpasta how old is your LO? DH and I didn't DTD after DD was born for about 4 months. Is she BF? That really effects my sex drive. Lack of sleep definitely doesn't help either.
We barely had sex the first year of DS's life. Less than six times with a pity bj or two.
Something switched hormonally at a year for DW. We still have time and energy issues, but those first six months are a good time for a man to get reacquainted with his hand.
-My son was born in April 2012. He pretty much rules.
@ratpasta how old is your LO? DH and I didn't DTD after DD was born for about 4 months. Is she BF? That really effects my sex drive. Lack of sleep definitely doesn't help either.
Im struggling with the acronyms here but, I can guess based on context
Our boy is just three months old..... would you like to catch me up on some of more popular acronyms around here? heh
We barely had sex the first year of DS's life. Less than six times with a pity bj or two.
Something switched hormonally at a year for DW. We still have time and energy issues, but those first six months are a good time for a man to get reacquainted with his hand.
this is true, and quite possibly one of the reason I can get to sleep at all at night
@klondikebar I have been there. In the two years after we got married we had sex maybe 5 times. Sex was painful and got to the point where it was unbearable. I did the depot lupron shot for my endometriosis which helped tremendously but made me a miserable shell of a person for a year. We got pregnant with DD and had sex twice while I was pregnant. So in three years we were at 7 times. I never take for granted that it doesn't hurt now because I know it could go back to hurting at any time.
That being said...we had sex 8 times in two weeks which is ridiculous for us but then AF came so we are not doing anything right now...I am so hoping to pick back up where we left off when this bitch goes away.
this is all very disturbing to hear...... especially for how common it is. My wife and I have always had a very healthy sexual relationship and it has provided us a closeness that i have never known with another human being. it has enabled me to learn to trust women again, and want to get married etc etc Our intimacy had been declining throughout her pregnancy (understandably) and I was really hoping to get back to at least making love a few times a month.
One of my worst fears is being in a sexless marriage.....with the kid around obviously there are more important issues at hand - but a sexless marriage is not something I ever wanted to be in
DH and I kind of ebb and flow in the sex department. We just came off a several week dry spell due to a succession of illnesses (stomach flu is not sexy y'all) and are getting back in our groove this week.
I like it when he's aggressive and just takes charge. Like last night when he bent me over in the living room . It's also part of my motivation for losing weight - he used to be able to just pick me up and toss me around. I miss that.
"Man, be creative. Like the stuff you do. Do nice things. Love respectfully. Laugh a fucking lot. Curse when you feel like it. Life is cool." - Jean Grae
this is all very disturbing to hear...... especially for how common it is. My wife and I have always had a very healthy sexual relationship and it has provided us a closeness that i have never known with another human being. it has enabled me to learn to trust women again, and want to get married etc etc Our intimacy had been declining throughout her pregnancy (understandably) and I was really hoping to get back to at least making love a few times a month.
One of my worst fears is being in a sexless marriage.....with the kid around obviously there are more important issues at hand - but a sexless marriage is not something I ever wanted to be in
It's been three months since she popped out a fucking human being, the first six weeks of which she can't fuck you anyway. I get it's probably frustrating, but she's taking care of a newborn while you're gone all week. She's tired. Her hormones are still out of whack. Give it some time. You're being overly dramatic here.
"Man, be creative. Like the stuff you do. Do nice things. Love respectfully. Laugh a fucking lot. Curse when you feel like it. Life is cool." - Jean Grae
When DH and I were first married, we'd DTD 3-4x a week. When G was born, that dwindled to 2x a week. When G was about 16 mo, DH switched jobs and his new job literally drains him of energy. We're TTC#2, but now that G is older, doesn't take naps, we have a puppy, and DH's job blows, we've taken a hit in the sex department. Last month, we did it 2x… because I was like "It's Christmas. I want you right here" (pointing to my girly regions) and one day G took a long nap. I told DH that I miss those nights when we'd put G to bed then have a quickie on the couch. Nowadays, once G's in bed, we pass out! My secret NY resolution is to initiate more sex.
this is all very disturbing to hear...... especially for how common it is. My wife and I have always had a very healthy sexual relationship and it has provided us a closeness that i have never known with another human being. it has enabled me to learn to trust women again, and want to get married etc etc Our intimacy had been declining throughout her pregnancy (understandably) and I was really hoping to get back to at least making love a few times a month.
One of my worst fears is being in a sexless marriage.....with the kid around obviously there are more important issues at hand - but a sexless marriage is not something I ever wanted to be in
It's been three month since she popped out a fucking human being, the first six of which she can't fuck you anyway. I get it's probably frustrating, but she's taking care of a newborn while you're gone all week. She's tired. Her hormones are still out of whack. Give it some time. You're being overly dramatic here.
I would jump at the chance to switch places with her both in the job department and with having had the baby, hell my dad was the original mr. mom but unfortunately I don't get to make that choice. Im doing my best to be patient and not push anything. Doing therapy four times a month to help with anger and frustration as well. I work 10 -14 hours a day so my family can have a home in a nice area and my wife can drive a new car..... a little affection is appreciated
this is all very disturbing to hear...... especially for how common it is. My wife and I have always had a very healthy sexual relationship and it has provided us a closeness that i have never known with another human being. it has enabled me to learn to trust women again, and want to get married etc etc Our intimacy had been declining throughout her pregnancy (understandably) and I was really hoping to get back to at least making love a few times a month.
One of my worst fears is being in a sexless marriage.....with the kid around obviously there are more important issues at hand - but a sexless marriage is not something I ever wanted to be in
It's been three month since she popped out a fucking human being, the first six of which she can't fuck you anyway. I get it's probably frustrating, but she's taking care of a newborn while you're gone all week. She's tired. Her hormones are still out of whack. Give it some time. You're being overly dramatic h
***Stuck in the box*** Your wife is home alone with a newborn for 5 days. If you want to get lucky show up Friday night with dinner, draw her a bath give her a glass of wine and leave her alone for a few hours while you spend time with the baby and have zero expectations of your own. She might come around eventually.
I do my best to make things easier for my wife when Im home on the weekends...... the whole situation is tough for sure
this is all very disturbing to hear...... especially for how common it is. My wife and I have always had a very healthy sexual relationship and it has provided us a closeness that i have never known with another human being. it has enabled me to learn to trust women again, and want to get married etc etc Our intimacy had been declining throughout her pregnancy (understandably) and I was really hoping to get back to at least making love a few times a month.
One of my worst fears is being in a sexless marriage.....with the kid around obviously there are more important issues at hand - but a sexless marriage is not something I ever wanted to be in
It's been three month since she popped out a fucking human being, the first six of which she can't fuck you anyway. I get it's probably frustrating, but she's taking care of a newborn while you're gone all week. She's tired. Her hormones are still out of whack. Give it some time. You're being overly dramatic here.
I would jump at the chance to switch places with her both in the job department and with having had the baby, hell my dad was the original mr. mom but unfortunately I don't get to make that choice. Im doing my best to be patient and not push anything. Doing therapy four times a month to help with anger and frustration as well. I work 10 -14 hours a day so my family can have a home in a nice area and my wife can drive a new car..... a little affection is appreciated
Nobody's saying what you do isn't hard. I'm just trying to get you to see it from the other side. I had to have a come to Jesus with my husband over the same issue. It wasn't that I didn't want him, or I didn't want him around. I WAS FUCKING EXHAUSTED. Extended periods of interrupted sleep can do terrible things to a normally perfectly pleasant person. My body was run down, I was sick all the time, the baby needed me constantly. It wasn't that I didn't want to have sex with my husband, I physically and mentally just could not get myself there. If he had taken a moment to stop thinking about his dick and ask me what he could do for me, or drawn me a bath like PP suggested, I guarantee I could have shifted into the mood.
"Man, be creative. Like the stuff you do. Do nice things. Love respectfully. Laugh a fucking lot. Curse when you feel like it. Life is cool." - Jean Grae
Not to mention leaky, sore boobs, and post partum bodies ain't exactly cute.
"Man, be creative. Like the stuff you do. Do nice things. Love respectfully. Laugh a fucking lot. Curse when you feel like it. Life is cool." - Jean Grae
Give it time... she's barely past the 6 week restriction period for sex (it's very likely there may be discomfort still for her), she is still extremely hormonal, exhausted from doing things on her own the majority of every week, and still getting the hang of motherhood -- these are BIG changes and BIG adjustments for both of you.
This is one of those trying times where you have to try to rise above your personal upsets or resentments for the greater good... I promise that in time things will start to feel normal again, it took SEVERAL months, closer to a year, for us to get in the swing of things (not just sexually, but just living a life that feels anywhere close to normal)... the first 3 months was this horrible nightmarish haze for me and my H.....but it DOES GET BETTER....but it is important that you SUPPORT eachother, comfort eachother and just understand that this is temporary.
The worst thing you can do, is turn this into resentment, pressure her or add to her stress by making your frustration obvious, that will only make recovering from this harder, take longer, and will in turn make her resentful against you
Without a doubt, the first year of having a child is the hardest year on a marriage.. Hands down. Don't use this time as an example for what the rest of your life is going to look like or something, it's not... this is a unique and temporary time.... and you can survive it.
Without a doubt, the first year of having a child is the hardest year on a marriage.. Hands down. Don't use this time as an example for what the rest of your life is going to look like or something, it's not... this is a unique and temporary time.... and you can survive it.
This. I'm crossing my fingers that with experience the second will be easier on us when it happens, but I also know we'll be older and more tired than this time around :P
-My son was born in April 2012. He pretty much rules.
I have my fingers crossed for that too @luckydad! I think it will be ... when I had DS, I was SUCH a novice with all things baby, I'm an only child and never lived close to any cousins or younger family members.. I honestly had no experience. I didnt even know how to change a diaper. So I didnt have much confidence going into things, which made me already stressed before he even came. My DS was like going to a baby bootcamp, I feel like I had to learn everything the hard way. But NOW, when I think about number two, I feel far more confident.
The scary thing is, balancing two..... DS will be at least 3.5 by the time a second comes around, so... I'm hoping that means he's even more independent and it'll make things easier. But who knows.
I am doing my best to observe the advice given here and I'll have to bring it up with my therapist as well. Im struggling with many things and this is one of them for sure. Im really starting to feel the distance.... and My wife and I are very open and it's hard for me to keep my feelings from her but Im going to do my best to not share this but then Im not being open/honest with her. So im not sure which is worse.
Im also fighting feelings of resentment..... before we had out son, my wife quit her job I supported our household for two years while my wife was trying to get pregnant. I paid for fertility treatments, and handled the bulk of the housework as well because, well, she just never did much of it. She is getting better especially as a new parent..... but just being under a pile isn't exactly what I want my life to be - which has lead to; regret, anger, frustration, resentment, exhaustion..... yeah Im struggling
this is all very disturbing to hear...... especially for how common it is. My wife and I have always had a very healthy sexual relationship and it has provided us a closeness that i have never known with another human being. it has enabled me to learn to trust women again, and want to get married etc etc Our intimacy had been declining throughout her pregnancy (understandably) and I was really hoping to get back to at least making love a few times a month.
One of my worst fears is being in a sexless marriage.....with the kid around obviously there are more important issues at hand - but a sexless marriage is not something I ever wanted to be in
It's been three month since she popped out a fucking human being, the first six of which she can't fuck you anyway. I get it's probably frustrating, but she's taking care of a newborn while you're gone all week. She's tired. Her hormones are still out of whack. Give it some time. You're being overly dramatic here.
I would jump at the chance to switch places with her both in the job department and with having had the baby, hell my dad was the original mr. mom but unfortunately I don't get to make that choice. Im doing my best to be patient and not push anything. Doing therapy four times a month to help with anger and frustration as well. I work 10 -14 hours a day so my family can have a home in a nice area and my wife can drive a new car..... a little affection is appreciated
Just be sure to never say that to her if you are wanting more sexytimes tho.
I am doing my best to observe the advice given here and I'll have to bring it up with my therapist as well. Im struggling with many things and this is one of them for sure. Im really starting to feel the distance.... and My wife and I are very open and it's hard for me to keep my feelings from her but Im going to do my best to not share this but then Im not being open/honest with her. So im not sure which is worse.
Im also fighting feelings of resentment..... before we had out son, my wife quit her job I supported our household for two years while my wife was trying to get pregnant. I paid for fertility treatments, and handled the bulk of the housework as well because, well, she just never did much of it. She is getting better especially as a new parent..... but just being under a pile isn't exactly what I want my life to be - which has lead to; regret, anger, frustration, resentment, exhaustion..... yeah Im struggling
&nbs
p;
I'm hearing a lot of ME ME ME and I think you have several other issues with your wife that have nothing to do with babies. I know for sure my husband knew what he was getting into when he decided to start a family. He knew things were going to seriously change. He couldn't fathom exactly how, but he knew that NOTHING would be the same. And it's not.
Me too. You can't talk about all the things you've paid for. I'm guessing she didn't have a baby for herself (in reference to fertility treatments). It's your baby too. Try not to harbor resentment. I'm going to go ahead and guess you made the decision together for her to SAH. Stop thinking about all the money as being yours. And for the love of god please don't say that to YW.
Im not sure what I was thinking was going to happen after we had a kid. My wife pushed me really hard and maybe I shouldnt have allowed her to. It may sound a lot like me me me for sure, and this again is where im struggling. All my wife wanted was a baby and I did everything I could to create a happy, healthy and safe environment for that baby. The baby that i wished I felt a stronger connection to and saw more often.
@Ratpasta - Having a baby in our first year of marriage, I was worried that if we didn't jump back into the sack PP, DH would feel cheated or resentful. When we got married, someone had told him to take a jar and fill it with marbles every time we had sex and then after the baby was born, take a marble out every time we had sex after that. The guy telling him that said he'd probably still have marbles in the jar before our DS turned 1.
At the time, I told myself, "I won't let that happen" but not only was DH's friend's comment just plain idiotic, but it also causes unreal expectations of what intimacy is like when you have a kid in the house. I brought up the jar analogy not too long ago and DH said it would be stupid to keep track of how often we do it. Yes, we don't have sex as often as we would like (either one of us) but love is more than just sex.
As far as your expectations of what she should do to show appreciation for your hard work, is your kid clean and cared for every day? Do you still have a house to come home to? Did you eat today? Teamwork isn't always equally divided, but it's still teamwork. You're in it together.
@ratpasta I missed the part about you being gone all week for work. Does YW have a lot of help? Family nearby? Does she SAH or work? If you have family nearby are they coming over during the week?
I agree with PPs that it's important for her to get some time for herself to relax. She went through A LOT physically. And still is. Can you help stock the freezer with food so she doesn't have to cook as much during the week?
You are partners. I can definitely see both sides here. You're working hard and want to be close to YW when you come home. For a while that just may not include sex. That doesn't mean you won't ever have sex again. It just might take a while.
Thinking about it more, it might have been closer to 6 months PP before DH and I had sex. The first year after a baby is definitely hard.
my wife has some help from her mom but my parents are out. My sister has two littles ones and totally burned my parents out of wanting to help.... which I understand but it makes the situation harder still.
today, on top of the heap is alcoholism which is prevalent in my family. The biggest difference between me and the rest of my family is that I can stop drinking..... but man the more stress I go through the more I dream about drinking - and that scares me shitless.
Luckily for me Pabst was the discount beer at lunch so I only had one..... ugh that stuff is disgusting
As far as your expectations of what she should do to show appreciation for your hard work, is your kid clean and cared for every day? Do you still have a house to come home to? Did you eat today? Teamwork isn't always equally divided, but it's still teamwork. You're in it together.
edit: grammar
dammit..... what's with all these clearly thought out, good points to which I have no real good answer?
also, for anyone who reads this - my wife is a wonderful, loving, caring, amazing person who is better with kids than anyone I have ever met. She is still the clearest sign that I know of that there is a god.
Much of this has to do with my internal struggle, to which I'm not sure if I'm losing or winning
I am appreciating the honest talk between other posters and @ratpasta@pobrecita I don't think my DH has never had thoughts like this before but if he went on an internet forum expressing them I would hope the women there would be responding very similarly to these women.
@ratpasta I appreciate your honesty and that you seem open to change. It seems like you take therapy seriously and I hope the women here were able to give you a little insight as to how your wife may be feeling.
Ok. Buck up camper. You have a baby. The glorious money you make by working so very hard is not all a child needs for a healthy and safe environment. Perhaps you don't feel connected to your child because you're too wrapped up in yourself. I feel badly for your wife. She doesn't know she pressured you into having a child that is stealing all your attention. I'm sure this is not what she would have wanted. Maybe you should have been a bit more upfront about having kids before you "allowed" her to convince you to have one. Might want to up those therapy sessions to twice a week?
Ok, now THIS is harsh and unnecessary. People have feelings that don't always line up with how they're 'supposed' to feel. He said he's working on shit, damn.
"Man, be creative. Like the stuff you do. Do nice things. Love respectfully. Laugh a fucking lot. Curse when you feel like it. Life is cool." - Jean Grae
The difference is what they do with those feelings.... do they grit their teeth through this temporary situation and try to focus it into something more positive so that maybe there's a chance of getting over the hill faster and happier? Or do they turn it into resentment and possibly harm the marriage?
He is entitled to his feelings, just like we are entitled to ours.... it's all in the ACTIONS and how we solve or move past these hard life situations.
Obviously you don't think it's harsh. Of course he's coming off selfish...he's talking about himself and how he feels. He can't speak for his wife. All that "I feel sorry for your wife" and "bump up your therapy" shit is not constructive, just kinda cunty.
"Man, be creative. Like the stuff you do. Do nice things. Love respectfully. Laugh a fucking lot. Curse when you feel like it. Life is cool." - Jean Grae
And for the record, I think he's on the right track by going to therapy and opening up here and listening to our advice.... feelings like these are hard to overcome....but he seems to be working on it.
No need for such harshness.
Just like the feelings we women have are hard to deal with and overcome sometimes.. men and women both struggle during this time... There are alot of things I felt could have easily turned into resentment towards my husband, but I had to work hard to try to put myself in his shoes as much as possible to try to understand where he's coming from, had to grit my teeth and push forward.... vise versa for him. Shit was hard, but we survived.
Re: Can we talk about sex?
Aside from.that, TBH, DH is pretty vanilla in bed lately. Sometimes I just want rough, quick, and dirty. He's not always into it. So boredom strikes...thats kind of where we're at.Meh.
Aside from.that, TBH, DH is pretty vanilla in bed lately. Sometimes I just want rough, quick, and dirty. He's not always into it. So boredom strikes...thats kind of where we're at.Meh.
Also I too want to have more lust with it. Not well I like sex and doing it with you so lets go do it, but the I can't wait another minute sex in the laundry room/kitchen etc.
He only has one and it's practically new. He isn't in love with it but I love it.
For my wife and I, it's been more than three months.
:-<
it's been VERY hard for me to be quiet on the subject but with a new baby around I really didn't want to push the topic. The real issue is that I work out of town during the week and come home early on fridays, with a very healthy appetite for my wife and she just isnt into it. At all.
I dont know what happened with the whole pregnancy thing but she is like a different person. When she used to work, she used to wake me up at 5am!
we have discussed it at great length and I dont want to push it on her, so she has tried to instigate a few times but it's been very awkward and she complains about it being painful so we never really even get started.
It just seems like she is literally shutting me out - she doesnt want me there..... and it's very difficult to deal with especially being gone all week. I just feel like i should clean my own house, wash my brand new car that i never use, pay for everything and leave again.
so to answer your question..... um no
Something switched hormonally at a year for DW. We still have time and energy issues, but those first six months are a good time for a man to get reacquainted with his hand.
Our boy is just three months old..... would you like to catch me up on some of more popular acronyms around here? heh
why is that though? the baby? hormonal? choice? and during this period was your husband just on his own in this department....? or.....
That being said...we had sex 8 times in two weeks which is ridiculous for us but then AF came so we are not doing anything right now...I am so hoping to pick back up where we left off when this bitch goes away.
Our Little Raspberry Born 3/27/12
My wife and I have always had a very healthy sexual relationship and it has provided us a closeness that i have never known with another human being.
it has enabled me to learn to trust women again, and want to get married etc etc
Our intimacy had been declining throughout her pregnancy (understandably) and I was really hoping to get back to at least making love a few times a month.
One of my worst fears is being in a sexless marriage.....with the kid around obviously there are more important issues at hand - but a sexless marriage is not something I ever wanted to be in
"Man, be creative. Like the stuff you do. Do nice things. Love respectfully. Laugh a fucking lot. Curse when you feel like it. Life is cool." - Jean Grae
"Man, be creative. Like the stuff you do. Do nice things. Love respectfully. Laugh a fucking lot. Curse when you feel like it. Life is cool." - Jean Grae
Im doing my best to be patient and not push anything. Doing therapy four times a month to help with anger and frustration as well.
I work 10 -14 hours a day so my family can have a home in a nice area and my wife can drive a new car..... a little affection is appreciated
"Man, be creative. Like the stuff you do. Do nice things. Love respectfully. Laugh a fucking lot. Curse when you feel like it. Life is cool." - Jean Grae
"Man, be creative. Like the stuff you do. Do nice things. Love respectfully. Laugh a fucking lot. Curse when you feel like it. Life is cool." - Jean Grae
This. I'm crossing my fingers that with experience the second will be easier on us when it happens, but I also know we'll be older and more tired than this time around :P
Im struggling with many things and this is one of them for sure. Im really starting to feel the distance.... and My wife and I are very open and it's hard for me to keep my feelings from her but Im going to do my best to not share this but then Im not being open/honest with her. So im not sure which is worse.
Im also fighting feelings of resentment..... before we had out son, my wife quit her job I supported our household for two years while my wife was trying to get pregnant. I paid for fertility treatments, and handled the bulk of the housework as well because, well, she just never did much of it.
She is getting better especially as a new parent..... but just being under a pile isn't exactly what I want my life to be - which has lead to; regret, anger, frustration, resentment, exhaustion..... yeah Im struggling
thanks for the advice - oh and I ADORE Watterson. He has totally changed my life. I have his entire library!
It may sound a lot like me me me for sure, and this again is where im struggling. All my wife wanted was a baby and I did everything I could to create a happy, healthy and safe environment for that baby. The baby that i wished I felt a stronger connection to and saw more often.
today, on top of the heap is alcoholism which is prevalent in my family. The biggest difference between me and the rest of my family is that I can stop drinking..... but man the more stress I go through the more I dream about drinking - and that scares me shitless.
Luckily for me Pabst was the discount beer at lunch so I only had one..... ugh that stuff is disgusting
dammit..... what's with all these clearly thought out, good points to which I have no real good answer?
She is still the clearest sign that I know of that there is a god.
Much of this has to do with my internal struggle, to which I'm not sure if I'm losing or winning
@ratpasta I appreciate your honesty and that you seem open to change. It seems like you take therapy seriously and I hope the women here were able to give you a little insight as to how your wife may be feeling.
Our Little Raspberry Born 3/27/12
"Man, be creative. Like the stuff you do. Do nice things. Love respectfully. Laugh a fucking lot. Curse when you feel like it. Life is cool." - Jean Grae
"Man, be creative. Like the stuff you do. Do nice things. Love respectfully. Laugh a fucking lot. Curse when you feel like it. Life is cool." - Jean Grae