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Pregnant after 35
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update (not good)

kboydbowmankboydbowman member
in Pregnant after 35
After a first ultrasound this morning where the midwife found a baby but no heartbeat, she referred us out this afternoon for a higher resolution ultrasound.  Second ultrasound showed no heartbeat and stopped growth at 7w5d (should be 10w).  So I have lost the baby.  Wife and I are beside ourselves; she is still crying, I am in numb mode.  Have already called our respective works and taken the next week off.  Midwife will be calling later, presumably to talk about how to proceed; she drew an HCG level so hopefully that will let me know if it looks like I'll pass it naturally or whether we need to do a D&C or RU486 or whatever.  Still in shock.  Somehow I knew though - my boobs had stopped getting bigger and weren't as sore.  We will try again, but this hurts a lot obviously.  The ultrasound technician was very respectful and did take some still shots for us to keep.  In some ways I hate that we had announced already but in other ways it will be nice to have the support.
Current pregnancy -
First BFP on 1/4/22.  Due date 9/13/22.

Four prior losses, no living children - 1 first trimester miscarriage, 1 blighted ovum, 1 chemical, and one extreme premature live birth daughter who died at 15 days old.


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Re: update (not good)

  • rascus15rascus15 member
    I am so sorry for your loss.  I too had a loss before this pregnancy and I know no words can make the hurt go away. This LO is doing well but my heart still hurts for the first one.  My next dr appointment is on the first baby's due date so that will be a bitter sweet day.  The only advice I can offer is to cry when you feel like crying and lean on those around you who knew.  It was a good thing for us that we announced early so people understood what we were going thrrough.  Hugs to you and your wife.

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  • jbellejbelle member
    I am so, so sorry for your loss.

    AMA & SAIF. TTC #1 since Oct. 2010. DX: Unexplained. BFP on break after 32 months trying and 2 med cycles. Baby girl born at 40w0d!

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  • Beachgal72Beachgal72 member
    I am so sorry. I am glad you have support to help get through this. Sending hugs and strength to you and your wife.
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  • springbeduk2springbeduk2 member
    Lots of ((((((hugs)))))) to you and your wife, and so sorry for your loss!  It sucks.  It's good you are taking some time for yourselves to deal with this.  Hope to see you back here sometime when you are feeling ready to try again (if you choose to - don't mean to make assumptions, just to say that there is hope of success after loss).  Best wishes for your recovery from this both emotionally and physically.  
    Me: 39  DH: 44  together since 2000 married 9/2004 TTC #1 since 2/2012
    BFP #1 6/5/2012  m/c 6/15/2012 about 5w3d   BFP #2 6/?/2013 m/c 7/1/2013 5w 3d
    BFP #3 8/25/2013  EDD 5/7/2014    DD A. born 5/8/2014!!  Love!!!!
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  • obscurereferenceobscurereference member
    I'm so sorry for your loss. Please take care of yourself.
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  • QOTRQOTR member
    I'm so sorry.   Big hugs to you both.
    Me-41, Hubby-40.
    1st BFP-8/17/12!  Missed Miscarriage discovered @ 8 week US.  D&C.
    2nd BFP-2/13/13!  Blighted Ovum discovered @ 8 week US. Natural miscarriage.
    3rd BFP-5/22/13!  By early June, progesterone plummeting.  Another loss.
    August 2013 - started Donor Egg process, but surprise BFP with my own eggs.
    Dear Son born 5/28/14
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  • jodester2014jodester2014 member
    (((hugs)))
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  • babystacybabystacy member
    I am so sorry to hear that. My heart breaks for both of you. Hugs. 
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  • cornflwr33cornflwr33 member
    I am so sorry for your loss :(
    Married 08-04-13
    BFP 12-31-13
    EDD 09-01-14

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  • wolcottmomwolcottmom member
    XO - I am so very sorry.  Lean on your friends and family.  You need them now.  

    Be good to yourself.
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    Me:39 & DH:40 ~ TTC #2



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  • DawnHopeDawnHope member
    I am so sorry for your loss.
    Me-42 DH-43 TTC #1 since 3/11
    HSG 7/11 showed possible blockage
    8/11 BFP, then early m/c  (Natural)
    9/11 blood tests reveal Factor V Leiden (heterozygous)
    11/11 Hysteroscopy revealed uterine septum, which was repaired
    12/11 1st round of Clomid (100mg)=BFN
    1/12 2nd round of Clomid (100mg)=BFN 
    2/12 Repeat HSG=All clear 
    2/12 IUI with injectables #1=BFN 
    3/12 natural cycle=BFN 
    4/12 IUI with injectables #2=C/P 
    7/12 IVF #1=30ER, 9F, 3T, 1 Frostie 7/29=BFP! 
    8/27/12 No Heartbeat. Waiting to M/C 
    9/13/12 D+C
    12/12 Operative Hysteroscopy 
    1/31/12  IVF#2 ...BFP 2/6 m/c 2/12 methotrexate due to presumed ectopic
    July '13 IVF #3: 13R, 10M, 8F=BFP
    1st Beta=549  2nd Beta 594 3rd Beta 422. M/C #5
    IVF#4 in November=BFP…TWINS!!!!!

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  • kelley72kelley72 member
    So sorry for your loss.  Ts and Ps your journey continues with beauty and joy
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  • CheezeFaceCheezeFace member
    I'm so sorry for your loss.  I wish I had words to make it easier for you but know that even though we this group isn't with you IRL, we are sending you our best wishes.  Our thoughts are with you.  Again, I'm so sorry.
    ~Married 11/08~
    ~TTC since 01/09~
    ~SA & B/W - 06/09 - Normal~
    ~Encouraged by OB to "just keep trying" 06/09 - 06/10 (oh, the wasted time)~
    ~HSG - 08/10 - Clear/Normal~
    ~Lapo - 01/11 - Normal~
    ~Clomid 50mg, Trigger shot, Prometrium - 01/11, 02/11, 03/11~
    ~BFN - 02/11~
    ~IUI #1 03/15/11~
    BFP 3/28/2011
    Diagnosed with GD at 28 weeks. Controlled through diet and exercise. No insulin.
    Diagnosed with Cholestasis of pregnancy @ 36 weeks.
    Delivered via C-section @ 36 weeks on 11/9/11.

    TTC#2 for a few months naturally (ha!)
    ~IUI#1, Clomid, Trigger,  10/13 - BFN
    ~IUI#2, Femera, Ovidrel, 11/13




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  • Issa6601Issa6601 member
    I'm so sorry for your loss.
    Me:PCOS, fibroids DH: no issues 
    TTC for 3 years. IVF #1 in Jan 12 - severe OHSS; miscarriage at 11 weeks
    2 myomectomies and 6 hysteroscopies in 2012 and 2013.
    FET in Aug 2013 BFP

     
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  • Krisd6Krisd6 member
    I'm so sorry for your loss
    Thinking of you!
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  • 2redtulips2redtulips member
    I am so sorry. {{{hugs}}}

    _______________________________________________________________________
    First-time mom, 35+, parenting after a loss (mmc Oct. 2012 @ 8 wks), ttc for a year after loss

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    January PAL siggie challenge; Good advice:
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  • dannie2011dannie2011 member
    So sorry,hugs

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