Secrets on Saturday

BlondieBia21

I'm the opposite with makeup. I don't usually put it on because I don't feel like I'm good at it or look good either way.

LokiLahve

I just want to say I love (as much as an internet stranger can) all of you. It is heartbreaking to hear what tragic/unfair/ horrible things some of you have been through but still know you are all still amazingly strong women and wonderfully loving mothers.
This board has ladies from all walks of life, yet offers support and kind words in such a way if have rarely experienced irl.
I'm very grateful to be a part of this community and to know what amazing individuals you all are.
Huge hugs to all who are hurting. I truly hope you find peace or comfort with your troubles soon. And until that time comes it makes me happy to know the support is here for you if you reach out.

MinnesotaMomma91

I think i touched on this once saying ive struggled with my body image most of my life. I struggled with eating disorders and compulsive overcexcersing for about 11 years.

Ive been in and out of therapy, self mutilated, used sex, alcahol and relationships to make myself feel better. I hated the way i looked so much thats why i started getting tattoos because it was theraputic to change how i looked.

When i was younger i went to private schools, in middle school my class mates called a fat slut shit like that, in high school a guy who was dating one of my friends sexually assulted and another girl and he didnt face any consequences when we turned him in. Our school didnt do anything and didnt tell our parents 90% of what happened so our parents didnt press charges.

I didnt talk to my parents about it till i was 19 and weighed 85 pounds and an ex was threatening to drive me to portland for rehab if i didnt get help. Igot healthy for about a year then relapsed while married. I only weighed 90 pounds when i got pregnant.

Sorry about the novel...

JaymeMac

@KatieR2310 Yeah the bed thing isn't nice. At this point I think its become a security blanket for me....without it I am lost. Hugs!!

BabyE143

I was just recently diagnose with PPA and I feel like I'm hanging by a thread. My anxiety is through the roof, I've been losing weight like crazy- down to 102lbs when my pp weight was 130 - not good. But I worry about LO's health constantly it's irrational, I know I sound crazy, but my mind can't seem to come to grips. I'm so ready for my hormones to even out bc it's exhausting.

BabyE143

NikkiD522 said:

KatieS7 said:

@BlondieBia21 I'm bitter because there are unwanted and unloved babies born every single day and yet it was my boy that had to die. It's not fair.

:-( I'm so sorry you had to go through that.. This hurts my heart. If you ever need an ear, we're all here!

This exactly. If you ever need to talk we're here @KatieS7 (((hugs)))

jennme

.

HermansWife

I'm so sorry @Katies7 -

Lorjo2022

I'm not super active on TB but I'm sending hugs to everyone that has went through a hardship or loss. All of you are so supportive and helpful even though you're dealing with your own hardships, and of that I thank you.

My secret is that I'm jealous that DH can get DS to belly laugh. Like really deep belly laugh. All the time! It is really cute though.

Wjoyner08

LAMuehlen said:

I think i touched on this once saying ive struggled with my body image most of my life. I struggled with eating disorders and compulsive overcexcersing for about 11 years. Ive been in and out of therapy, self mutilated, used sex, alcahol and relationships to make myself feel better. I hated the way i looked so much thats why i started getting tattoos because it was theraputic to change how i looked. When i was younger i went to private schools, in middle school my class mates called a fat slut shit like that, in high school a guy who was dating one of my friends sexually assulted and another girl and he didnt face any consequences when we turned him in. Our school didnt do anything and didnt tell our parents 90% of what happened so our parents didnt press charges. I didnt talk to my parents about it till i was 19 and weighed 85 pounds and an ex was threatening to drive me to portland for rehab if i didnt get help. Igot healthy for about a year then relapsed while married. I only weighed 90 pounds when i got pregnant. Sorry about the novel...

This was me, my lowest weight in high school/ college was around 80, I am short though. I still struggle when I am stressed. I came to the realization that for the last few weeks unless I am out with people I am maybe eating one real meal a day. I know I need to do better and eat more calories but I am just so over whelmed and tired I don't care. I am thankfully not experiencing extreme supply issues, but it has reduced and the fat content seems to have lowered. I am trying to get my shit together so I can stop treading water and juggle life better. It's a big task but if I can maybe  my supply will get better.

sfeebs13

henderson1026 said:

when i was working I had a crush on my boss.  He wasn't even that attractive, I just think it was the boss/assistant thing.  This is the main reason I have never and will never read 50 shades.

He also popped up in my dream last night and when I woke up I remembered today is his birthday.

Guilty. I dated my boss. I was a junior in high school, he was a junior in college. He was attractive, but I do believe it was more of the fact that I knew I shouldn't be involved with him that made me want to more.

ETA- I know it wasn't a "big career job" but it still got us in trouble when the "big guys" found out.

I dated one of my fire instructors. We dated on and off for 4 years and finally I moved in with him. He came and saw me as often as he could when I was in jail, it was so hard for him talking to me through the window. He would cry. He tried to stick with me through my addictions but I was fucked up and ungrateful. He was quite a bit older than me, but I hate what I did to him.

kanned0121

I have no self esteem/confidence. The reason I still don't have a degree is thus anything I think I may like I convince myself I'd be a failure and would rather not know.

MommyBolty

I have zero... Like negative sex drive. It's really sad. We still haven't DTD. I know it's killing him and hurting us. I don't know how to get my libido back. Used to couldn't get enough. Now,..get that thing away.

julianndelaney

My MIL sent me one of the most disgusting texts last week. Starting WW3. And really messing up my happy joyous holiday mood. I may not ever forgive her. So I de-friended her on Facebook because...

Marvel1013

My names frank, I'm a 56 year old man. I love fruit cake, wine spritzers, and speed dating

Revez

KatieR2310 said:

My names frank, I'm a 56 year old man. I love fruit cake, wine spritzers, and speed dating

Ktbug613

back at ya @katies7

KQuinonez

I was busy last night and then I fell asleep but I just wanted to take the time to say that my heart goes out for so many of you. You are all more brave than you give yourselves credit for and have overcome more than most people ever dream of. It is not easy to be open about your hurts but it does help the healing process. I wish I could just say something magical and make all your worries and heartaches go away.

Add me to the low sex drive club. We have done it 3 times. I want to do it until I see myself in the mirror. I have always been insecure but having a baby has really taken its toll on me. I just do not feel attractive at all and I really get overwhelmed by it. I know I should give myself a break but I just feel so ugly that I do not know how to get passed it.

Marvel1013

@zever000

kkay1982

Hugs to all of you who have gone through/are going through these things. I was date raped in high school and lost my virginity. It took me till after college to really get past it and date again. But it was until I met DH that I really felt like I was in a good relationship. No matter what you're dealing with remember you have lots of creepy internet friends here to love on you.

starshower22

After reading your secrets I just want to say there are some very strong women on this board. (((hugs))) to all if you.

tts432462

LO kept me busy last night so I missed this. All of you ladies should be so proud of how strong and courageous you are. Your LOs are so lucky to have you as their mommas. I'm praying for all of you that find peace and sending you internet hugs.

bendicott7

@BlondieBia21, thank you!

@Hiddenmickey, if you ever want to talk about it, I'm here.

@Katies7, there are no words, but please know how very sorry I am.

sfeebs13

LokiLahve said:

I just want to say I love (as much as an internet stranger can) all of you. It is heartbreaking to hear what tragic/unfair/ horrible things some of you have been through but still know you are all still amazingly strong women and wonderfully loving mothers. This board has ladies from all walks of life, yet offers support and kind words in such a way if have rarely experienced irl. I'm very grateful to be a part of this community and to know what amazing individuals you all are. Huge hugs to all who are hurting. I truly hope you find peace or comfort with your troubles soon. And until that time comes it makes me happy to know the support is here for you if you reach out.

starshower22 said:

After reading your secrets I just want to say there are some very strong women on this board. (((hugs))) to all if you.

You are all amazing women. I'm so happy to be a part of such a wonderful, strong group of momm as.