XP: FMLA Nightmare

atcwag · December 2013

Ok, I'm going to try to keep this brief....

My LO (12 weeks on Thursday - eek!) has been hospitalized since 12/9 (at our local hospital, now at Children's Hospital - Pittsburgh) for severe dehydration due to vomiting and diarrhea. He lost nearly 2 lbs. in 2 weeks.

My FMLA ends this week and I am scheduled to return to work on Thursday. Obviously, this has been agonizing. How do you leave your LO?!?! Fortunately, my husband and my mother have some vacation time that could be used, but.....it's just not the same as mom being here.

I have been given the most amazing gift of approximately 2 weeks pay by my medical director (I work in healthcare) and have been offered a "solution" to my problem from my employer. Basically, to comply with FMLA requirements, I need to resign from my position. However, it is up to my department as to posting my job for re-hire, which they are not going to do. As long as I return to my position within 90 days, it would be more of a "reinstatement" and my benefit time, years of service, etc. would remain the same. The only major downfall would be that my insurance would go to COBRA.

Here are my questions:
1. I have health insurance through my employer and through my husband's employer as my secondary policy. If my policy is dropped, will my husband's effectively become my primary? Do I need to do anything to ensure this? If it doesn't work this way, knowing I would be literally 24/7 in the hospital with my son, would you go without insurance for the short amount of time until I return to my position (insurance would be reinstated on the 1st of the month following my return) or pay over $600/month for COBRA?
2. Are there any specific questions I should ask my employer regarding my resignation/reinstatement? I plan to get their answer in regards to my status remaining the same in writing.
3. At this point, I don't know if my LO will be here another few days or another few weeks. Unfortunately, I'm running out of time to make a decision in regards to what I'm going to do about returning to work. I plan to talk to my boss again about whether I should wait until the last minute to resign, if needed or whether I should just resign now and re-evaluate my situation in 2 weeks. Even if my LO is discharged later this week, he may come home with his picc line and I'm sure it's going to be an adjustment getting into a routine again and being more "needy". I have been pumping this entire time to keep my supply up, however he hasn't effectively nursed in more than 2 weeks and hasn't nursed at all since early last week. I'm sure that is going to take some real work to get back to EBFing without problem. What would you do?

mae0111 · December 2013

What a terrible situation! What would happen if you couldn't go back to work right away? What if they didn't post, but the req got pulled and they couldn't hire you back? Happens in my company all the time... Would you be OK for a while without your income?

Re: insurance, every plan is different. DH and both work for large multinational companies, so a resignation would be a "life event", allowing an off-cycle change. It wouldn't just happen - we'd actively have to sign up. But that may be different at his company. He should investigate.

Honestly, if I was in this situation, and the situations above were ok, I would quit. But that's an emotional decision, definitely not logical.

Best of luck to you and your LO. I hope he is feeling better soon!

atcwag · December 2013

We would be ok without my income for a month or 2, but no longer than that.

I'm not worried about not being hired back, but then again, crazier things have happened. My boss is actually "making up" for my maternity leave by covering much of my position, however that includes decreasing his time spent in his position and cannot happen for a significant period of time. My department literally cannot function effectively for any lengthy period of time without being fully staffed, so I don't think there is any chance they would cut my position or anything like that and my coworkers/boss have determined that they will not post my position.

VitaLuna · December 2013

What insurance is LO on? That would make a big difference in my decision. I would try to keep LO double covered, because no doubt this illness will be horribly expensive.

Re: returning to work.. Can you live without your income if something were to happen to your position? If yes, then I would resign. I would wait until the last second to do so, though, so that you may have a better idea of what LOs recovery will look like. Like PP said, while they say they'll welcome you back, things happen and you may not be able to get your job back. It is unlikely they will give you anything in writing.

Not sure how your company works, but would your director be willing to give you those two weeks of pay in the form of PTO? If so, you can "return" from FMLA leave, and then immediately use those two weeks of PTO.. Which would give you 2 more wks to figure out which direction things are going.

And lastly, I recognize you from my BMB. I had no idea your LO was sick and I'm so sorry to hear that

carlab44 · December 2013

First, I'm sorry about your LO. Hope he gets to come home soon.

I'm confused about why you have to resign? FMLA says they have to hold your job (or an equivalent job) for 12 weeks, but it doesn't say they can't let you take more time than that off. You just aren't covered by FMLA if you request (and they grant) more time off.

Personally I'd be hesitant to resign. That would make me nervous - especially if we weren't comfortable living on just one salary for an extended period. Did they make you use your vacation or sick time during FMLA? Or could you request a few vacation days off over the next few weeks? Then rely on your husband or mom for the other days?

If you do resign, I'd talk to your insurance companies to find out if you would be covered under your husband's policy without COBRA. There is no way I'd try to go without insurance for any amount of time - especially given the ACA mandate starting up on January 1.

djm31012 · December 2013

I have no advice but just wanted to say im so sorry your LO is sick and I hope he is better really soon. Good luck to you all!

jlaOK · December 2013

First of all, I'm so sorry that your family is going through this and I hope your LO has a fast recovery.

I would be very hesitant to resign from my position. As a couple have mentioned, a company can extend your leave time beyond the 12-week FMLA at their discretion. It sounds like you will need more time off. I would do anything I could to get the time off without resigning.

As far as insurance, loss of your benefits should be considered a "life event" that would allow your husband to put both you and LO on his insurance. You need to double check with you DH's insurance company on this.

Since you work in a hospital, do you have the option of going to part-time or even reducing your hours and still working full-time? Remember also that your DH is eligible for FMLA as well. Since you can afford to quit your job you may need to look into him using his FMLA to help care for you LO.

Once again, I'm sorry you are having to deal with this. Especially, having to focus on work logistics instead of being able to be with you LO.

caladpi02 · December 2013

Does your company offer catastrophic leave? We can donate vacation/sick/PTO to people that need time off but are out of it. I would not resign and see if your H can take FMLA.

ASmallWonder · December 2013

Yeah I absolutely would not resign. The fact that they are saying you need to but won't post your position doesn't sit well with me because if they aren't going to post your job, why not just let you take a personal (unpaid) leave of absence? Once you resign, no matter what they've promised you, they have zero obligation to do ANYTHING for you.

cedenton · December 2013

Ditto everyone else. FMLA is just protection for people with crappy admin. If you have nice people who say you can take unpaid leave, then there's nothing preventing them from doing so. Hell to the no would I resign.

I can't even imagine your position, but long term what would probably be best is for your family is to keep your job/benefits. If NO ONE could be with LO that's a whole 'nother story, but if your husband and mom can help out...

VitaLuna · December 2013

In reading other responses, I'm remembering now that my employer also has an extended leave option for up to 6 months. It is complete employer discretion (not mandated like FMLA), and you have to have enough hours per paycheck to cover your insurance benefit deduction. The hours can come from spreading your PTO out, or from donated hours from coworkers (or from those two weeks your boss is giving you). Might be something to look into.

Murphie82 · December 2013

I don't have a whole lot of advice short of - DO NOT RESIGN unless you are ok with the idea that they may not hire you back regardless of what they say. They should be able to extend your leave (since that is effectively what they are doing by asking you to resign/be re-hired), which would mean you'd have no reason to resign.

Good luck with everything and I hope for a speedy recovery for your LO.

atcwag · December 2013

As policy, my company does not offer personal leaves of absence. My DH has not been at his current company for a year, thus is not eligible for FMLA.

jf198400 · December 2013

No advice, but just wanted to say I'm so sorry you are going through this. The laws in this country are terribly inadequate. I hope your LO comes home soon!

Have your DH talk to his HR about the insurance, you should be covered per "life event" of losing your primary coverage.

caladpi02 · December 2013

atcwag said:

As policy, my company does not offer personal leaves of absence. My DH has not been at his current company for a year, thus is not eligible for FMLA.

I was on mobile earlier...what would they do if you were in a car accident? Chemo treatments, etc? That is what we have "catastrophic leave" for-when you run out of time off or have nothing left. People can donate their vacation and sick to you and you can use it. Would they be open to something like that?

umma4babes · December 2013

Ditto to what everyone else said. There's no requirement in FMLA that says you have to resign if you are taking more time off than what FMLA gives. Your employer either doesn't really know the law or is trying to push you out without looking like a big douchebag. Also, if you resign, you don't get unemployment benefits. Employers who really try to help out their employees usually "eliminate" the position or something similar so that you're laid off - so that you can collect the benefits.
I would go back to work at least for a few weeks, and see if you can qualify for another FMLA when the new calendar year begins with your LO's situation as a new event. Or propose a part time work schedule. Good luck!

JessAnnJ · December 2013

I would definitely not resign for the reasons stated above. I don't see how you resigning somehow makes it possible for them to take you back.

Piper1Chapman · December 2013

Like someone mentioned, I think this qualifies as an additional FMLA event. Look into that! And do not resign. Hugs, hope your LO feels better soon.

Muffins_Mom · December 2013

Just so you know where I'm coming from, one of my responsibilities is to approve or deny requests for FMLA for my employer, so I deal with this every day, literally. Unfortunately, this will not give you another 12 weeks of Federal FMLA, which only mandates 12 weeks in a single 12 month period. Does your employer use a rolling 12 month period or a calendar year? What state are you in? Some states require a more generous FMLA than the Federal FMLA. I'm not advising you, but I'm not sure if I'd resign. This doesn't smell right to me. I don't understand your statement "to comply with FMLA requirements, I need to resign from my position." That makes no sense. I don't have any idea what "requirements" they're referring to.