Fake drinking tips

ebp913

I've seen this come up a bit here so I wanted to share all my fake drinking tips for the holidays!  I love beer and wine and I don't like to announce my pregnancies until 12 weeks or later so I have had to fake drink quite a bit in the last couple years.  Here are my tips

- grab a beer in a brown bottle and pretend to take sips.  You can take it with you to the bathroom and dump it out and refill the bottle with water.  You can continue to refill the beer bottle with water all night so you can actually be drinking something.  Or you can have your SO/DH casually switch bottles with you. Be aware... this makes for a drunk SO!  

- order water or sprite or cranberry juice in a drink glass with a lime.  Don't let the bar put it in a water glass as that's a dead giveaway, it has to be in a drink glass. 

- sneak in a bottle of non alcoholic wine if you have to get out of drinking wine or again, dump it when you go the bathroom or swap with your SO.  Again, warning, when your SO drinks twice as much covering for you, he or she gets sloshed!

- never be ordering at the bar with a friend.  Send your SO to get drinks so you aren't caught ordering water with a friend who is like, WHY ARE YOU GETTING WATER?! ARE YOU PREGNANT!?  (this happened to me)

- If you must, one sip will not be the end of world. Take your sip then distract to something else! (ie champagne toasts, etc)

Those are my tips!  Feel free to add any others.  If you enjoy social drinking and don't want to tell everyone you've got a tiny baby in your uterus this is the way to go!  

LupeVallejo

My entire first pregnancy I ordered "virgin vodka soda with lime" or "vodka soda with lime, hold the vodka".  

megmarissa

I did the vodka and soda hold the vodka 4 nights in a row. I'm a wine lover so I'm sure I was getting the side-eye but no one said anything...

karacc18

I got through a family party on Saturday by bringing my own stash of Welch's Light Grape Juice.

 Everytime my Great Uncle poured me a glass of wine, i held it for a little while and then went in the bathroom and poured it down the drain, pulled my large water bottle filled with grape juice out and switched it. No one knew the difference!

I plan to do the same at the cookie swap i am hosting on Saturday, only it will be easier because I can hide the jug of juice in the bathroom vanity.

allisonud

This is my big concern for Christmas!  We will be at my parent's house on Christmas Day and they are BIG wine drinkers!  None of us bring wine to the house when they host us because my dad is a wine snob and will only drink from his collection  We will start the day with champagne, move on to white wine and then red wine with dinner & dessert.  It is going to be so hard to fake because I will not be in my own house and able to pour a glass of non-alcoholic wine or something.  No one will drink beer or anything else, so I can't use some of the other tips.  I think my only option is to take the glass from my dad and walk around with it, dumping when I have an opportunity and having my DH drink some when he can.  I feel terrible wasting so much good wine!!!  I hope this works. 

laurync87

YES! haha This is going to be the hardest part of our next few weeks.  We are traveling up north to stay with family for two weeks over the holidays and have already made plans with family and friends we haven't seen in a while, all which involve going to dinner or somewhere everyone will be curious why I'm not drinking.  Thanks for the tips! I drink vodka with sprite and a splash of cranberry a lot, so I plan to get there early and tell the bartender or waiter ahead of time that when I order those I actually want it without the vodka but still in a bar glass.  Hopefully no one blows my cover! haha

sarahg8r

I did tonic & lime at two Christmas parties last week. Unfortunatley, the bartender gave me away in the end when he made rounds at the end of the night and asked if I wanted another tonic and lime in front of some people. THEN, I found out (from the person who realized something was up)...that you aren't supposed to drink tonic while pregnant. SO many rules! I am really bummed because so far, tonic is the only virgin drink that actually makes me feel like I'm getting a real drink. I tried the soda with cranberry and it wasn't cutting it.

BlckRoses

Thanks for the great tips!  I've only had to fake drink once, and I just made my own drinks at my friend's house while no one was looking.  I even pretend poured the vodka into my glass which felt very silly.

I do have a bunch of happy hours and new year's to get through.  I plan on just 'drinking' the same thing as DH and have him swap glasses with me.  I didn't even think about the pouring out idea, but it seems like such a waste.  

I'm sure my friends will figure it out eventually, since we joke that all of our activities involve drinking in some way.  

KayD2010

@Sarahg8hWhy can't you drink tonic?

KJLR2012

Another tip - fill a flask with water and mix it with sprite.  People will think you're drinking vodka sprite!

Rosebean

While I love my wine, my family knows I am a slow sipper. With a tendency for DH to steal mine. I think we are just going to act out me getting mad at him for finishing my wine. That should work for Christmas dinner. For parties though, I love my spiced rum and egg nog. And my friends know this so I am hoping no one pays attention. :S sometimes I just seriously think that if they don't know you were trying, it might be the guilty looks on our faces that really give us away.

caballablanca

I would have a cup and just pour some beer into dh glass when no one was looking. That way it looked like I was just nursing that beer.

HeatherHam10

I could've used this tips last week! My DH got me a coke with a lime and forgot to get it in a cocktail glass...I hope no one noticed.  I just acted like it was a double. 

Mrss827

I just found a wine at the liquor store called "Fre". It's alcohol removed and was only $5!!

bumpuser10179393

Don't forget to act fake drunk too!

sarahg8r

@KayD2010 tonic has quinine in it which is class C.

tabaskoa

Yep these are all great tips! And you can bet I'll be stocking up on some Fre wine.

My tip to add to the above, act normal! You might think it's obvious that you are faking, but if you are having a good time and being subtle...most likely nobody will even notice you are not real drinking! If you start acting strange or trying to cover it up too much people will start to notice.