weight..

MrsMeatball41

Can we just delete the thread and move on. All points have been made. And guess what----- it's Friday!!!!!

amhah09

MrsMeatball41 said:

Can we just delete the thread and move on. All points have been made. And guess what----- it's Friday!!!!!

[-X

KatieGummow

@kellealward, Also, OP is not worried about the weight gain for health reasons, she is feeling fat. If you would have made that post and stated those concerns the outcome would have been a little different.

People: i feel like we are just trying to tell her she isnt fat. Why is that so bad?

thomas930

MrsMeatball41 said:

Can we just delete the thread and move on. All points have been made. And guess what----- it's Friday!!!!!

Sorry threads don't get deleted just for flaming/snark. They really have to break TOS to be delete worthy. 

MrsMeatball41

I didn't mean for flaming... I mean bc the same points are being made over and over and over.... That's all.

AcaAwkward

mummyofsix said:

JessieAlbin said:

mummyofsix said:

I have made the decision to refuse weigh ins from now on. Inspired by @biggerinreallife who said her Dr doesn't make her. I like this very much. I cannot believe that it has taken me 10 children to reach this epiphany. 

All I can see in this post is 10 children. As a FTM who cannot fathom the idea of doing this again, I kinda wanna give you a medal or something. And a Wayne's World "we're not worthy!" gif. (But I'm mobile so the mental image will have to do)

We do it for tax purposes. And for the sexy van I get to drive. 

That response is the best thing in this thread BY FAR.

cloudninemom2be

jellysparkles said:

sayysayy13 said:

dear god! holy shit, god forbid i ask a question im a FTM who waent sure about weight gain. dont need to make me feel like shit... its fucking weight i was just wondering how other people were doing with this because i felt fat..

You got it easy, sweets. Check the links I posted for you. You don't even have to search.

Jelly you are such a doll!! I vote you as sweetest April Momma ever!

cloudninemom2be

Why can't we all just get along?!?

cloudninemom2be

MamaFantastic said:

ohhhh, i'd say i've gained about this much: 

|  <------------------------------->  |

Haha! Make that two of us!

WifeofaComposer

jennypenny1014 said:

sayysayy13 said:

dear god! holy shit, god forbid i ask a question im a FTM who waent sure about weight gain. dont need to make me feel like shit... its fucking weight i was just wondering how other people were doing with this because i felt fat..

You gonna GBCB now too? I bump on mobile all the time, and even I can see that we've had a kajillion weight posts in the past 5+ months...without having to search for them.

ETA: Not to mention several ladies on this board have been pretty damn vocal about their feelings on weight posts/weight questions/weight inquiries in other posts...you'd have to be blind to not have seen any of this.

I weigh over 250lbs before pregnancy. You still feel fat now with your piddly 18 (out of 25-35) lb weight gain giving you nothing more than an ass and something to fill your bra?? Thought not.

@jennypenny1014 - Let's get married.  :x

WifeofaComposer

Who wants cake?

jennypenny1014

WifeofaComposer said:

jennypenny1014 said:

sayysayy13 said:

dear god! holy shit, god forbid i ask a question im a FTM who waent sure about weight gain. dont need to make me feel like shit... its fucking weight i was just wondering how other people were doing with this because i felt fat..

You gonna GBCB now too? I bump on mobile all the time, and even I can see that we've had a kajillion weight posts in the past 5+ months...without having to search for them.

ETA: Not to mention several ladies on this board have been pretty damn vocal about their feelings on weight posts/weight questions/weight inquiries in other posts...you'd have to be blind to not have seen any of this.

I weigh over 250lbs before pregnancy. You still feel fat now with your piddly 18 (out of 25-35) lb weight gain giving you nothing more than an ass and something to fill your bra?? Thought not.

@jennypenny1014 - Let's get married.  :x

YES! YES! A thousand times YES!!! 

Sisimama10

KelleAlward said:

I was surprised when my OB was significantly concerned about 18 pounds gained at 21 weeks, while I assumed it was normal. From what I am gathering here other women with similar weight gain at this point are not getting the same response from their Ob.

There are many valid reasons for discussing weight and this is a great way for FTM's like myself to get guidance from STM's. I've learned lots through previous weight discussions and I think it's silly to make it a taboo subject.

A shorter person say 5'1 that was at the high end of her healthy weight range before becoming pregnant gaining 18 pounds is not the same as a 5'11 woman that was underweight or at the low end of her healthy weight range gaining 18 pounds. Each woman on here has a different body and different circumstances.

A number that they have gained is really not comparable because you're not going to find someone that is the exact same as you to compare yourself to. So, the number of pounds gained does not tell you much anyways. Your doctor knows you, your body and your history. If they're concerned make changes, if they're not keep up what you're doing.

Alana1977

Bluebird2318 said:

@BiggerinRealLife Your Supernatural GIF warms my heart. :x That show was such a guilty pleasure for me. 

That show was such an addiction for me! Before I was pregnant I used to joke that if I had a boy I was going to name it Jared Jensen (their real life names combined). So yummy

Rachel71189

amyjeanaz1 said:

sayysayy13 said:

dear god! holy shit, god forbid i ask a question im a FTM who waent sure about weight gain. dont need to make me feel like shit... its fucking weight i was just wondering how other people were doing with this because i felt fat..

This is exactly why I never ask questions. You never know what nerve you might hit. I personally only use my phone to sometimes look on here.. So I've never seen any weight posts either. Sucks people feel the need to be snarky with eachother.. Especially when your just looking for some reassurance. That's what we're all here for right? To support one another?

I'm sorry ur getting grief. I six weeks ago got scolded for a post like this also. There are some of us out there that like it discuss it. Sad others ruin it for us. 18lbs sounds great! I've always been super tiny but I've gain 13 and for me that feel huge too! Good luck.

KelleAlward

Thanks for the feedback. I'm actually 5'10 and slender. The doc said that by 20 weeks I should only have gained 10 pounds and a half pound a week thereafter. Her statement was based on her standard for pregnancy weight gain.
I am active, have low blood pressure and am all around healthy. It seemed strange to me because I had seen posts of other women with similar weight gain whose docs weren't concerned. Either way, I'm cutting back on calories and trying to find the energy to exercise a bit more.

My doc is at Kaiser and my appointments are always brief. I think the Kaiser healthcare system is very impersonal, as was the "10 lbs at 20 weeks" guideline. At least Kaiser does a good job of keeping up with testing, ect.

csmily51

So um Despicable Me 2....mmm BANANAS!!!

mrsB68

I also don't get why it's such a taboo topic (and I'm no looking for a response on this). The post is clearly marked weight so if you're not interested, just don't read it. While comparisons aren't equal sometimes posting your emotional feeling with some stats to back it can be helpful to get others opinions on. I know personally I had a VERY tough time emotionally with my weight change (loss or gain) because it was a body change as a FTM. Hearing other Moms opinions is actually what got me through it. So for some of us, we need to discuss it. Again, I'm not trying to start anything just explain that posts are usually for a valid reason and are not required to be read.

pineconey

mrsB68 said:

I also don't get why it's such a taboo topic (and I'm no looking for a response on this). The post is clearly marked weight so if you're not interested, just don't read it. While comparisons aren't equal sometimes posting your emotional feeling with some stats to back it can be helpful to get others opinions on. I know personally I had a VERY tough time emotionally with my weight change (loss or gain) because it was a body change as a FTM. Hearing other Moms opinions is actually what got me through it. So for some of us, we need to discuss it. Again, I'm not trying to start anything just explain that posts are usually for a valid reason and are not required to be read.

yeah.... you're right. 38497985729527 of these posts a week are totes necessary.
THANKS SO MUCH for digging up a post that had finally died.
and there have been plenty of women here who have explained why it's a "taboo topic".

NYJodway

It is unhealthy to fixate on weight, whether you are pregnant or not.  That said, I completely understand that some people do not cope well with weight gain, even during pregnancy, and may be helped by seeking better coping skills from those with similar struggles.  However, this is not the same as body weight comparisons, which are dangerous.

People who have experience actually dealing with ED and trying to get better, as well as people who are familiar with treatment of ED, are well aware that weight comparison in social contexts is a driving force behind body image issues and unhealthy weight control habits.  Think along the terms of social comparison theory.  Our self-evaluation is affected by the norm we perceive to exist among our peers.  There are three possible outcomes to our participation in direct weight change comparisons.  One is that our self-evaluation is not truly affected. This will require either a sound, objective viewpoint of weight in pregnancy or strong coping skills, which people fixated on talking weight are not likely to have.  The second possible outcome is that our self-evaluation is negatively affected (by a perception that our weight change does not match the norm).  Obviously, if someone is having "a very tough time emotionally with their weight change," this outcome can be anywhere from somewhat harmful to downright devastating.  The third possible outcome is that our self-evaluation is affected positively because we view our weight situation as normal when compared to that of our peers here.  Even this behavior, which seems all fine and dandy on the surface, can be particularly dangerous during pregnancy, when weight should not be viewed as normal or healthy based on the weight of other pregnant moms.  We may convince ourselves that something is perfectly fine, when, in our particular case, it is not.  This can obviously have very serious consequences for us and our developing children.

The "need to discuss" coping with weight gain should be viewed as an entirely different concept than discussing direct comparisons of weight gained by individuals.  A post wherein a person might say, "I'm having a really difficult time coping with weight gain as a first time mom, because I don't have a healthy viewpoint of body change that I can't control," would be met entirely differently than a post that says, "how much have you all gained?"  These are two very different conversations. 

There is no need to discuss a direct comparison person a's weight vs. person b's weight.  It is categorically unhealthy, thus it will be continuously discouraged by those who encourage good health in pregnancy. 

NYJodway

pineconey said:

yeah.... you're right. 38497985729527 of these posts a week are totes necessary.
THANKS SO MUCH for digging up a post that had finally died.
and there have been plenty of women here who have explained why it's a "taboo topic".

He looks so fabulous.  I wonder how much he weighs! 

mammasuzelov

@nyjodway.. Your post is everything that should be posted in the second post of this thread..

For shame on the person who felt compelled to drag this up and BOOM nyjodway

Edit to add that if you are worried about your weight gain talk to a doctor or nutritionist. Someone who can give you good advice or direct you to someone who can.

As someone who has battled with an eating disorder and all the destructive thoughts that go with it, I can say now that I don't think it's anyone's business how much I weigh unless that person is my doctor.