FFST pulled me out of lurking...

ComfortablyNumb

You guys would be really creeped out to know how long I've actully lurked these forums.  There are 3, well actually, now 4 boards I lurk daily. I am always compelled to comment or contribute more, but I suck, I'd rather lurk

Unfuckingtill, I just read the FFST.  Like I'm not a weirdo or anything, but, I really want to know these questions, seriously.

Anal - cant get my head around it.  Like you would willing give that shit up for nothing?  At all?  Fuck.  This could only happen in my marriage throught bait and bribery. A strategy needs to be inplace, you know?  ex.  Me:   I really want these new curtains for the front room H:  No, thats insane, lets put up a sheet. It works the same.  I need to spend more money on fantasy football.  Me:  I will give you anal.  H: Where do we order.  BAAM.  Every time folks.  Every fucking time. Don't give that shit out for free.  We aint Halloween.

And also, my other question goes to the waxing ladies.  I shave, and have to do it every other to day to feel fresh (not that I do, but in a perfect world)  When you wax, and wait 3 weeks, is it 2 weeks of bush before you get fresh again?  That's my problem, I don't want to wait for it to grow

Thanks all for bringing me out of lurkdome

 

SandyClam

I don't do anal and I don't wax. I could probably star in a 70's porn with my bush. YWIA for that image. Welcome.

SandyClam

@gwinnygirl, I totally live in your skin suit. The extra pubes make me feel cozy.

SandyClam

Finally, @mbenit4!

thetheisens

Meh, I like anal when I am in the right mood. It can be pretty hot. As Richard Slap would put it, some LAP is usually nice. I should be getting free curtains out of the deal? Halloween only comes once a year, so I'm more fun than that.

ComfortablyNumb

@MrsSkull1107 Was it too much?  Too soon?  I understand..

 

Learning the ropes

RichardSlap

@morgann2010 and I have the same sexual proclivities and adorable babies with the same name. I'm starting to think she's my alter ego. 

Weird? Yes. 

ComfortablyNumb

@Mrsskull1007 hey, I have no shame.  It's certainly fascinating to me how people just give that shit up for nothing. Anal fucking sucks.

RichardSlap

Sex as a weapon, the shining beacon of a healthy relationship.

ComfortablyNumb

justAphase said:

Well if people enjoy it, it's not exactly giving it up for nothing is it? How about you talk more so we can judge you for whatever it is you do.

I understand, really.  Where do I start the application process?  Ask me all what you like...I feel a drape question coming...

RichardSlap

morgann2010 said:

Richard Slap said:

@morgann2010 and I have the same sexual proclivities and adorable babies with the same name. I'm starting to think she's my alter ego. 

Weird? Yes. 

I knew I liked you.

LaurelBee

S/o FFST. Remember that Bj I promised Dh? Notafuckingchance. Just thought I'd update you guys. Also, anal? Nowayinhell

LaurelBee

Ps post more!! @comfortablynumb Eta Don't be scared off from joining in

ComfortablyNumb

Richard Slap said:

Sex as a weapon, the shining beacon of a healthy relationship.

15 years and going strong.   Sometimes you take a little and sometimes you give a little.  You're welcome.

thetheisens

I would rather have anal than give a full on bj. That shit takes too long and if I finish where's the meat for me? 

klondikebar

I'd take over his fantasy team, win and buy myself some curtains. The butt is off limits.

ComfortablyNumb

@MrsSkull1107 how long have you been married?  Curious minds...

 

RichardSlap

ComfortablyNumb said:

Richard Slap said:

Sex as a weapon, the shining beacon of a healthy relationship.

15 years and going strong.   Sometimes you take a little and sometimes you give a little.  You're welcome.

ComfortablyNumb

curious thats all.  And you're giving him anal at request, I take it?

 

RichardSlap

ComfortablyNumb said:

curious thats all.  And you're giving him anal at request, I take it?

 

LOL.

ComfortablyNumb

morgann2010 said:

Tell us your most embarassing secret.

Do you return your buggy at the store?

Feelings on fruit desserts?

Haven't warmed up to ya's for that yet.  Not sure if you guys are warmed up to me either....what a mixture!  

ALWAYS..not even a question here.  Through sleet, snow and hail, the buggys are returned to the corral.  It snows in ft here, so there's that.

I am a salty person, but strawberry shortcake will win my heart, always

RichardSlap

I'm super confused. When MH and I fuck, sometimes the flow of things leads to things in my butthole. There's no requesting or bargaining about decorating or whatever. Unless you count sexting for foreplay...?

ComfortablyNumb

MrsSkull1107 said:

ComfortablyNumb said:

curious thats all.  And you're giving him anal at request, I take it?

 Awesome, but I just wanted to point out, that you are being kinda weird about this thread.  What's your issue?  

If this is directed to me, the answer is no. I don't do anal, even if he asks for it. We do things we BOTH like.

RichardSlap

Somebody didn't lube up enough before entering the board.

ComfortablyNumb

Richard Slap said:

I'm super confused. When MH and I fuck, sometimes the flow of things leads to things in my butthole. There's no requesting or bargaining about decorating or whatever. Unless you count sexting for foreplay...?

slow claps...good job!  Is this you're reality, or are you trying to earn bump cred?  Feel free to use, over and over the decorating, bargaining, and drapes.  I get it.  But, can you repeat, the scenerio  when you and your H fuck..didn't quite understand.  Thanks

ComfortablyNumb

My god, some of you are a tough crowd.  Here I thought it was the most laid back parenting group ever.  Fuck.

ComfortablyNumb

justAphase said:

It is laid back, that's why judgy posts don't usually go over well.

But also, Parenting is like NY or something.

Thank you, but can you explain judgy?

thetheisens

Are we getting all butt hurt?

ComfortablyNumb

thetheisens said:

Are we getting all butt hurt?

Well played

ComfortablyNumb

Touche

thetheisens

morgann2010 said:

thetheisens said:

Are we getting all butt hurt?

If she would loosen up it wouldn't hurt so bad.

Glass of wine and a tube of lube. 

RichardSlap

After seeing the drunk bumping around here lately, I'm convinced I have mad drunk typing skills. All due respect, I'm just trying to feel like I have a talent. 

thetheisens

MabelShesTheBomb said:

why dooent you go here @cashingn2? we rally like you

RichardSlap

I'm anti-spit. Too short lived. 

In a bind, use coconut oil.

missyishere

Now now @Morgann2010, don't forget you're my bitch first.  TYVM

ComfortablyNumb

fuck you are all drunk dirty whores.

RichardSlap

Precisely Mabel. You get me. 

RichardSlap

ComfortablyNumb

Cashingn2 said:

Wait though, OP, aren't you the one that has sex with your H when you want him to give/buy you things. I think we just stumbled upon the definition of whore. I rest my case

nope, I certainly did not say that.  Perhaps go back and re-read.  I attempted to insert myself into a fun, witty, carefree public thread, in a fun, whitty carefree way.  Man, you guys take this shit personally.  I enjoyed the snark, but obviously too soon to much for me.  Tell me how to get to first base?  I tend to rush things...

ComfortablyNumb

Cashingn2 said:

Cashingn2 said:

Wait though, OP, aren't you the one that has sex with your H when you want him to give/buy you things. I think we just stumbled upon the definition of whore. I rest my case

nope, I certainly did not say that.  Perhaps go back and re-read.  I attempted to insert myself into a fun, witty, carefree public thread, in a fun, whitty carefree way.  Man, you guys take this shit personally.  I enjoyed the snark, but obviously too soon to much for me.  Tell me how to get to first base?  I tend to rush things...

You said in your post that you used it for bribery. You specifically said if you wanted new curtains, that's when you offer anal. I just re-read it. Eta: you said Me: I really want these new curtains for the front room H: No, thats insane, lets put up a sheet. It works the same. I need to spend more money on fantasy football. Me: I will give you anal. H: Where do we order. BAAM. Every time folks. Every fucking time. Don't give that shit out for free.

you are confusing sex with anal. 

thetheisens